Thomas had expected to see red when he walked back through the door to his home on the 27th of December, and he did. Though it wasn't the red flurry of anger he'd expected from his fiancée's lips, it was the deep colour of her satin dress as she sat on the floor with Charles in the living room, playing together with his Christmas presents.

The house was eerily silent and his footsteps echoed obnoxiously loudly as he walked through the doorway into the room, opening his arms as Charlie sprinted to him without a second of hesitation.

He took his son into his arms and hugged him tightly, though it was nothing but guilt and regret that he felt as he looked over his son's shoulders and saw Blair staring at him with empty eyes.

"Daddy, come and look at all the toys Father Christmas brought me! There's trains and cars, books, too. Look, you can help me with his jigsaw puzzle!"

Charlie pulled his father by the hand over to the pile of gifts beneath the tree, an excited smile on his face as he pointed out everything he'd opened on Christmas Day.

"Alright, Charles. Just let me talk to Mummy first, I need to-"

"It's fine."

Blair rose to her feet, grabbing the glass of red wine from the table before walking swiftly out of the room, not turning to look at Thomas once.

She wasn't sure she'd ever cried as much as she had done on the evening of Christmas Day. After endless family members asking 'where's Tommy?' and 'how come Thomas isn't here?', a lonely silence beneath the sheets of her empty king sized bed was a bittersweet welcome.

It was the lack of answers that hurt the most, she thought. Nothing had ever been straight forward with Thomas Shelby. Although Blair had grown to accept that sometimes not knowing anything was better than knowing everything, being left alone on Christmas with nothing but a hurtful lie from Tommy had seemingly drained the soul from her body.

Of course, Blair laughed and smiled for the next two days until her family said goodbye on the morning of the 27th. She'd enjoyed their company and was glad to have her family all together again, but ultimately, it had meant nothing. The wholesome goodness of a family reunion had been overshadowed by a coldblooded lie from the one person Blair needed to trust.

To say Polly was furious would've been an understatement. She couldn't get in touch with any of the boys despite her hardest efforts and although she'd tried to console Blair, there was nothing that could fix the way she felt inside when she looked at the empty chairs around the dining table on Christmas Day.

Neither Polly or Blair had any idea where Thomas and his brothers were, what they were doing or if they were dead or alive. The thought of not having Tommy walk back through the door in one piece was sickening to Blair, enough to force her to drink her way through the day to numb the pain of such an awful thought. Though, having him return home safe and sound was almost just as bad.

Thomas left Charlie in the living room and walked after Blair a few moments later, finding her perched on the windowsill of the dining room, staring out at the snow falling across the driveway.

He approached her cautiously, sighing loudly before reaching out and placing a hand on her shoulder when his presence alone wasn't enough to catch her attention.

"Don't touch me." Blair said, shrugging his hand from her skin, her jaw clenched as she continued to watch the snow, the glass of wine still in her hand.

"Blair, I'm so sorry. The job took longer than we thought and-"

"I thought you were dead, Thomas."

He swallowed when her words hit her. There was a coldness in her tone that he hadn't expected to be there, one that he had never heard before. Of course, he'd messed up more than enough times, but each time they'd had the resolving conversation, Blair's anger had been passionate and hot, not emotionless and frozen.

Admittedly, the thought of finding an opportunity to phone Blair and let her know he was alive and that he'd be back later than planned had never been an option to him.  Tommy decided it would be better for her to know nothing than to argue with her over a telephone call and to face his fate when he did eventually return home.

He'd always come home, Tommy assumed Blair knew he'd be alive and well because he always made it back to her, a promise he'd made before and would continue to make. There was nothing that would ever stop him from doing his job and walking back through the door with a few cuts and bruises but still, a beating heart.

Though perhaps, he realised, a promise wasn't always enough.

"I'm sorry. I know I should've called and-"

"No. You should've never gone away in the first place. You left me alone on our first Christmas together, our first Christmas as a family with Charlie and you decided to leave us for work."

"You weren't alone, you had your entire family here."

Blair scoffed, finally turning round to look him in the eye. Her lips were painted the same red as her dress and her blonde hair was curled down her back, her eyes covered with a thin, gold glitter that matched her earrings and wristwatch.

"Do you take me for some kind of idiot, Thomas? You knew you'd not be back in time for Christmas, that's why you made me invite my family, to make sure I wasn't alone. Do you think I didn't work that out straight away?"

Tommy held her gaze with a blank expression. He could tell she desperately wanted to shout and scream but the tiredness in her eyes told him she'd used up any energy she had already.

The fact she was right only made Tommy feel worse. There had been a plan in place for months to carry out that particular job over Christmas and he hadn't wanted Blair and Charles to spend Christmas alone, and so the suggestion of inviting Blair's family for the holidays seemed like the perfect solution.

Thomas knew he was never going to be home on Christmas Eve and although it hurt him to feed Blair a lie, he thought having her family all together again for the first time in years would make up for his absence. Only now, it was clear he'd been wrong.

Blair shook her head, taking a sip of wine as she looked at Thomas with glazed eyes. She was exhausted, emotionally and physically drained, and he looked the same. His eyes were pale and his skin dull, the top button of his shirt was undone and there was no tie hanging from his neck, or any cuff links on his wrists.

He still looked beautiful, Blair thought. No matter how angry she was, how sick she felt when she finally heard the front door open that afternoon, she knew that there was nothing else on Earth that could ever come close to being as beautiful as Thomas was, and no amount of emotion would change that.

"I'm sorry, I had no choice. There are some things with work that I can't just-"

"What will it be next, Tommy? Will you miss my birthday, or Charlie's? Will you even turn up to the church on our wedding day or will I be left alone then, too? Your job is important, I know that, but there are some things that take precedence over work."

Her words were hurting him but he had to stand there and take it. Blair had every right to be angry, Tommy knew that, though the suggestion that he'd miss the most important day of his life felt like a deep cut across the chest. Though in hindsight, he knew deserved it.

"I love you, Blair, more than anything. I should've been here, I know that. There was nothing I wanted more than to be here with you and Charlie for Christmas but-"

"That's a lie, Thomas. If you wanted to be here, you would've been here. The fact of the matter is, you chose that job over your family and you chose to lie to me. There are only so many times I can tell you to think before you act, you need to realise that there are people in the world that actually care about you and want you, Thomas. I wanted you here with me, I wanted you to sit and help Charles open his presents, I wanted you to open a bottle of champagne with a smile on your face and I wanted you kiss me under the fucking mistletoe, alright? But you weren't here, because you chose something else over me, over us."

Thomas was speechless as he stood in front of Blair. He saw the coldness drain from her eyes and in a split second, tears filled them. Her bottom lip quivered and Tommy felt his heart shatter in two as Blair tried her best to stay composed, only it was clear she had no strength left inside her.

Blair thrust the glass of wine into Tommy's hand and stormed out of the room, running up the staircase without turning back. He sighed loudly, sinking down onto the windowsill.

"Fucking Hell, Tommy," he whispered, looking across the room to the portrait of himself and Dangerous that hung on the wall, "What have you done this time, ey?"