You were walking to Four's castle, with a basket of goodies for your boyfriends when Three calls to you.

"OI!"

You look around, confused.

"OVER HERE!"

You look to your right and see Three running up to you. He tackles you down into a hug and picks you up, "ITS DONE, LOVE, ITS FINALLY DONE!!" Spinning you around

You giggle and look at Three excited, "It is?! IT IS?!" You look over at the building, "OH MY GOD! It's..it's so cool!!" You kiss Three.

"I know right?!" Three says when he puts you down. He gets on top of the roof, "these are actual bombs!" He touches one and it explodes. He falls back to the ground, running up to you again and grabs your shoulders, "Come on! You have to see the inside!"

"Honey, your on fiRE-" Three drags you inside, causing you to drop your basket

__________

You look around, amazed, "holy shit...this..this is so...beautiful.. Honey..this is amazing!"

"Why of course it's amazing. It was made by me!" He grins with pride.

"Hey hon!" You wave at Four and walk over to him.

"Hey sweetie." He waves lazily at you.

You walk over to him and kiss him, "What do you think? It's this amazing?!"

"SMG3's Coffee and Bombs is open for business baby!" Three smiles with joy.

Four only shrugs, then he looks at Three, "Meh."

"Excuse me? 'Meh'?! What wrong with it?" You look at Four, confused and a bit upset.

"Yeah! Explain yourself!" Three looks at Four, annoyed.

"How are you going to run a cafe? You've never made coffee before."

"Oh uh..he does have a point, dear.." You look at Three, worried.

Three only scoffs, "How hard could it be?"

Four only looked more smug, "Well, as a coffee drinker myself... it actually requires a very high IQ and a level of artistry that you couldn't possibly have-" a bomb gets thrown on his face and explodes.

You snort, stiffing a laugh.

"Just stay out of my way." Three say, pointing at the burnt, crisp man, "I'll show you how it's done!"

You roll your eyes. You can't say that Four didn't deserve it, "Well..since you don't have any other workers..maybe I can-" you get cut off by the bell.
You turn and see Boopkins entering the cafe.

"Hello? SMG3?" Boopkin calls out as he looks around the cafe.

"Oh! Your very first customer! Do you need me to go sit down somewhere?"

"Nah, you're good where you are." Three kisses your cheek and goes over to Boopkins. "Coffee, rope, bombs! You want it? It's yours my friend, as long as you have enough rupees!" Three does a meme reference as he advertises what he sells.

"Isn't that from Link?.." You ask yourself as you pet Eggdog, who came up to you asking for pets.

"Oh yea! I'll try having a cappuccino, please!" Boopkins smiles.

"Coming riiight up!" Three claps his hands, "Oh eggdog!" Eggdog barks and goes over to his owner, "please show this gentleman to his table."

Eggdog barks, and rockets over to a table, barking again. Boopkins didn't really know what to say about that, walking over to the shown table.

______________

Three walks behind the counter, you stand with Four, "Alright! Let's make a cappuccino!" He was about to start but then got confused by all the buttons and modes. The words on the buttons then turn into a different language, causing Three to get more nervous.

Four laughs, "you have no idea what you're doing, do you?"

"SHADDAP!"

"Four! No!" You sigh, "Three do you need help? I'm (a coffee drinker so/ not a coffee drinker but) I can probably help you."

"No no..I got this.." He shakenly presses a button. The machine makes a bunch of worrying sounds, having a spasm attack, until it spews out....something.

"Hah! See? Easy as hell!" Three smiles with pride.

You and Four look at the coffee cup, concern, "Are you sure that's even coffee?" Four ask.

"Here let me try." You take the cup and took a sip.

"ACK- FUCK! That's not coffee at all! It's melted gunpowder!" You spat it out. You cough, your head felt weird, like it was about to explode but didn't...

Three felt bad and guilty that he didn't stop you, Four felt the same, but he felt annoyed at Three as well.

"Is everything okay in there?" Boopkins ask, worried.

"Y-yeah! It's fine!" Three points at Eggdog, "Eggdog! Could you entertain our quest while I warm the coffee machine?"

Eggdog barks and then starts to dance. Boopkins dances a bit as well.

___________

Back with Three, he was lightly shaking, scared of what to press.

Four just laughs, "Need some help?"

"No!" Three takes out his phone, "I can do this!" He starts to watch a YouTube video but it's basically the same as the last...how many chapters ago it was. Three was writing down everything, "Right...I see..yea.." the video shows the person slamming a shovel down and through many bags of sugar and three dozen of eggs, Three continuing to mumble as he writes his notes. Three puts it down and picks up an idea.

"An egg?" Four ask, confused, "what are you do with that?"

You knew what he was planning, "Honey.. whatever you're planning..no-" but Three ignored you and started to throw eggs at the coffee machine, then milk, a COW-

*BOOM* The coffee machine was now on the ground and Three proceed to throw backs bean cans on it. Why? Who the hell knows. Maybe it's his 'secret ingredient'. Then...who da fuck. A potato man? You're so confused. Why..? Then Three begins to hit that pile of mess with a crowbar.

You and Four look at this scene, not knowing what to say. You look at Four whose face is now Pomin's.

Then Three begins to cradle it like it was a baby. THEN HE TOOK OUT A FUCKING MACHINE GUN and begins to shoot at it.

"THREE! What the fuck?! Stop!" You shout over the noises, covering your ear.

The mess he made popped away, Three puts it back, "I was done anyways."

"Oh..sorry.." You were a bit embarrassed.

"It's okay love!" He smiles at you.

A small cup of coffee moves out from the machine, a small song was heard. Three takes it and sniffs it.

"...no freakin' way..." Four couldn't believe it. Did that actually work?

"HAH!" Three runs to Boopkin.

You started to laugh, not expecting that you actually work and how Four is reacting.
_______________

Eggdog was going around in a circle, with a bunch of eggs beside him.

Three walks up to Boopkins, "Order up!" He held the cup to him.

Boopkin took the cup, taking a sip and made a big deal out of the taste, humming louding, making Three get more and more nervous. And you being you, you were also nervous. You didn't want your emo to have his dream shattered.

"Wow it's so great!" Boopkin smiles.

Three smiles, sighing out of relief. You do that same, happy from him.

Three smiles smugly at Four, Four looking surprised before striking as well, "Alright well, looks like you're a success! Why don't I invite the whole gang over here?"

"Wait what?!" You shout, "no no no! Don't do that! Stop texting!"

"Uh- yea what (Y/n) said, maybe not that many people yet-"

"Too late" Four finished texting, sending it to the group chat.

You look at Four angrily. How could he do this?! "Four. Once everyone is gone. You and me are having a fucking chat." You growl at him.

Four gulps, feeling like he made a death wish.

A loud horn is heard, Three looks up, nervous, "oh dear god.."

A bus crashes through the roof, making you jump and scream. Everyone comes out of the bus, looking around and admiring the decor, Boopkins smiles and waves at them.

"Heyyyyyy nice place you got here." Mario compliments.

"Yea this is so cool!" Meggy smiles.

"Oh uhhh, thanks! Yea!" Three outs on a pair of sunglasses, "Welcome to my new coffee and bomb cafe!!" He thumbs up.

Everyone moves around, seemingly ignoring him.

"Three...if it ever gets too much, I'm always here to help." You say, putting a hand on his shoulder

Three looks at you lovingly and then looks at Four, frowning, "I got this love..thanks for your concern though.." he takes your hand, making sure no one is watching and kisses you knuckles. You blush, smiling a bit.

Three look over at the counter and sees Mario, Saiko and Luigi lining up, "I got to take these order, okay love?"

"Okay hon!" You smile, even if Three can be brahs and rude, he can make your heart melt by one little kiss...man you're down for him deep..

_______________

"Well! What can I get for you Mario?"

"Spaghetti!"

Three looks at him, a bit weirded out, "we don't..serve spaghetti-"

"Lotta spaghetti!" Mario interrupts.

"We don't.."

Mario begins to scream.

Three deadpans, annoyed, "sure..." he writes it down...only he wrote down '1 jar of poison for Mario' then he looks up at Mario, a fake smile on his lips, "that'll be ready for you in a moment!"

Mario thanks him, walking to the side. Saiko taking a step forward, ready to order when Tari walk in front of her, making her sad.

"Can I get a unicorn fappucino?"

Three looks at her confused, "uhh, what??"

"A unicorn fappucino!!" She shows him her phone, showing a picture of it, "all the star bucks have them at this moment!!"

"This isn't a-" you get caught off by Four.

"How can you not even have the unicorn fappocino?

"BECAUSE THIS ISNT A-"

Three shoves a biscuit in your mouth, "weee...have those!" He looks at his coffee machine worriedly. All the directions turning into a different language.

After swallowing the biscuit, you were about to speak when you Bob using a rocket launcher, Saiko moves out of the way, Luigi sees it and screams, covering his face.

You sprang into action, using your hat to suck the rocket up, "HEY! Don't you dare use those in this cafe!" You growl at Bob.

"Hey! No using the merchandise until you brought it!" Three shouts at Bob, pointing at him.

"I'm just sampling it!" He picks up another one and uses it, intentionally aiming it at you.

You dodge it,"HOW DARE YOU!" You glare at him.

The bomb made Luigi fling into the air, landing on Eggdog.

"OH NO THE POOR EGGDOG!" Boopkins shouts.

Three immediately ran up to them, drop kicking Luigi off of him, "are you okay? Did that mean man hurt you?" Eggdog barks.

Mario goes behind the counter, in front of the coffee machine, "hey, any spaghetti in here?" He starts to mess with it. Making some...sort of rainbow liquid come out.

Three jumps over the counter, shooing Mario away, "OI! GET AWAY FROM THERE!" He gives Tari the cup of whatthefuck liquid, "here you go! One cup of unicorn fappocino!"

"Yippeee!!" Tari takes it and walks away.

Saiko comes up to the counter, "Oi! Can I offer now?!"

"Yea yea, what do you want?"

She looks up at the board, "can I have-" she exploded due to a rocket launcher. She got up and glares at the duo. Bob and Meggy point at each other, "it was him/her!"

"NO MORE FUCKING BOMBS!" You shout, you run up to Bob and tackle him down. Bob shoves you away, the two of you start to fight.

Saiko's rage slowly going down as she sees the fight, but then she aims her rage at Meggy. She glares at her and starts to throw bombs, Meggy ducks and hides, soon bring out her own weapon.

"OI! Stop- (Y/n)?!" He cut himself over when he sees you fighting Bob, he moves to stop it but then Tari starts to run like crazy.

Three looks at the mess in his cage, getting overwhelmed. Four looks at him, smug as ever, he went to say something but Three was quick, "shut up! Go fucking stop (Y/n) from fighting!"

"Wait what?!" Four runs over to where you were to stop you.

"Where's my spaghetti, SMG3??"

"WE DONT HAVE SPAGHETTI!!" Three says, desperately trying to get that into his head. And it seems like it worked. Cause Mario falls to the ground and starts to cry.

Three was startled, he looked at the mess. He couldn't believe it. Four comes back to him, holding a bruise and bloody you.

"LET ME GO! I HAVE TO TEACH THAT BITCH A FUCKING LESON!"

"Honey calm down!" Four tries to calm you down.

Three never seen you think crazed and angry, he did it want this to happen, "oh no...this wasn't how today was meant to go..!"

Four huffed, finally gotten you to clam down by taking your hat over and runs his fingers through your (h/c) hair, "so..you admit you can't run a shop yet?" The only answer Four got was his screaming.

Three runs away and goes to his 'evil lair'.

Seeing that mad Four guilty.

"Great going hon." You say sarcastically, "what were you hoping to get out of that?"

"I...honestly don't know..."

"Come on, let's go see how the emo is doing." You got up, grunting a bit and heads to where Three went, Four following along.

____________

At the ding of the elevator you hear Three shouting, "OI!! THIS IS PRIVATE PROPERTY!! GET OUT-"

You and Four walk in, "wow this is a pretty cool place you've got down here." Four says as he looks around.

You immediately went up to Three, and despite his protest, you got on the bed and hug him tightly.

"Love...what are you doing..."

"Hugging you."

"Why..?"

"Because your gonna through stuff because of Four,"

"How did you know?!"

"Heheheh..I just do..let us help you darling."

"No! Four was nothing but help today! ALL THAT CHAOS IS BECAUSE OF HIM!" Three point at Four, angry,

"I know I know... I guess i was just giving you a hard time, 'cause..y'know, that's whatwe do to each other, right?"

Three looks at him surprised.

"In all seriousness though, I think you really do have something great here," Four walks up to him, "You just need a little bit of help cuz it's a lot to manage...and I think you got one." He smiles point, pointing at you.

You nod, "yep! I can definitely help you!"

"I know where you two are going with this, and I'm NEVER accepting your guy's help."

Your frown, letting go of him and stood beside Four.

"But.."

You both look up at him, questioning.

"What if I pay you?" He brings out a coin, "You'd then be working for me, and THAT I can do."

Four smiles, "sure! I can't complain with that!"

"I don't really need the money but I'll gladly take it!" You snap your fingers and your outfit change into something that fits the theme of Three's cafe.

Both Three and Four shakes their hand.

__________

You all go back upstairs to see the same shit is happening, "Jesus Christ.." you mutter, you half that Boopkin is protecting Eggdog.

"ALRIGHT GUYS! LISTEN UP!"

Nothing..

Three looks at you two and you nod.

Three cups his hand around his mouth, "WHO WANTS A FREE COFFEE!?!"

Once he shouted that, everyone and everything was back to normal.

"Alright SMG4, Love. Let's get to work!"

You get behind the counter with Three and start to making coffee for everyone with him.

Four uses his heelys that he owns and skate around, catching the coffee and giving it to everyone. He even gave a bone to Eggdog.

Eventually everyone got their coffee and was happy.

"Yay! We did it!"

Three chuckles at your enthusiasm, thinking it's cute. Four skates up to you guys as you lean on the counter, still behind it and Three is in front of it.

"Yelp, you did good, underlings."

"Yeah yeah, don't get used to calling me that. This was just a one-off thing."

"Gasp! Underling?!" You bap Three on the head.

Three chuckles, "sorry love but that's what you are when you work for me!" Three smiles, "so..I was right and this was a big success, huh?"

"Yea I guess-" Four realized something, "wait, how'd you make Mario calm down? I we didn't have spaghetti."

"Oh I gave him something else."

"I was going to get him real spaghetti but Three insisted we give him-" and angelic noise is heard, "that."

Four looks at you nervously, "so..am I still going to get that talk..?"

You chuckle lightly, "no...you proven yourself not to get one..though that apology could've been better.."

"What?! But...oh well.."

You laugh, giving Four a kiss and then Three one too, "see you guys later.."

"See ya sweetheart!"

"Bye bye love.."

_______________

Once you head home, you realize something when you passed by the mirror, your wounds... your ran back to the mirror looking at yourself.

"THERE GONE?!" You shout. You never even realized. Holy crap. What..what else is going to change..? You gulp..moving away from the mirror..

Heya journal,

Totally didn't forget I have you... so ya..Three now has a cafe and me and Four (who acted smug the whole a time) helped him with a serving the whole gang (no thanks to Four). I also got into a fight with Bob, Four pulled me back. I don't even know when..but...all my bruises and scratches are gone..all healed... it..it feels wrong and weird...what do I do now..? Let it happen..?

Good night....

F̸i̴v̶ (Y/n)

_________

Words: 3005

FUCKING FINALLY AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

GO FUCKING SPAM Madisoncoughenour74  FOR FUCKING ENCOURAGING ME AND A SHOUT OUT TO EVERYONE FOR WAITING AND TELLING ME TO MAKE IT!

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA