I'm on my couch brushing eggcat's fur. The melatonin I had yesterday did work...but not much. I still woke up early in the morning, more specifically one in the morning. So what do I do? I work. I also had to come up with plans incase the 'IGBP' incident happens earlier than expected but that won't happen until after Mar10 video. So I plan a few but not many. Anyways. I was getting done with brushing Eggcat's fur went Mario bust my door open.

"JEEZ! what the hell?! My door!" I sit up and walk over to the crossed eye Mario. "Uh.. hey Mario? What cha need?"

"Mario and Tari are going to Texas want to come along?"

I think for a minute. I'm not feeling my best but... "Sure! I love to come. Do I need to pack anything?"

"No time!" He then grabs my shoulders and picks me up, taking us to the castle.

__________________________________

We arrive at the castle and we waited for the taxi. While waiting I start to get a headache. Surprise I didn't get it sooner with all the 'sleep' I get...

"YEAAAAAAH BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOI!" Mario shouts as the taxi has arrived.

Tari appear out of nowhere carrying luggage and a large duck. "OK, I wasn't too sure what to pack, so I-" She get cut off but Mario grapping her, knocking the luggage out of her hands.

"NO TIME, TARI! TEXAS IS WAITTIIIING!" He throws Tari into the taxi and tries to get in, but Tari stops him.

"Wait! What about SMG4?" She asks.

"Yea I don't really like leaving people out of something if they can come along. Let's go get him and see if he wants to come!" Mario reluctantly comes with me to goes to SMG4's room to get him.

Mario shakes the door. "HELLLLLOOO!"The door vanishes and SMG4 pops out.

"Y-Yes?" He ask somewhat nervous?

"SMG4!!!! WE'RE GOING TEXAS!!!!.

"And we were wondering if you want to come along?"

"Oh, uh, was that today? Uh... I'm sorry, Mario. I can't come today. I'm in the middle of making a special video." He says gesturing to his computer.

"What!? But you're always making videos! That's never stopped you!" Mario seems to be upset.

"Yea what Mario said. Even when I have something planned I always postpone it for Mario and everyone."

"Not this one... This one's going to be different... K BYEEEEEEE!" Four goes back to resume working on his special video, but not before planting a sapling and watering it, making a new door grow in place.

Mario's head turns into SMG4 head but with the glasses and the weird smile. "...NEERRRRD!!"

I punch his face. "Oh! Sorry! I just don't really like seeing Four with glasses on...they weird me out...especially with that stupid smile..."

"It's-a okay! I'm-a fine! Let's get back to the car!"

"Right." We both walk back down. However I look back at the closed door. I get another headache. F—king leave me alone you headache... ugh.. I hate these. Let's hope I don't throw up in the taxi. I rush downstairs, not wanting for Mario to leave me behind for being slow.

___________________________

On the road, Mario is jamming to music, to Tari's amusement. I have one of my ear buds in my ear listening to my own music.

"You seem really excited for Texas, Mario!" Tati points out.

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-"

"DUDE! Not in my ear! Ow..." and my headache is back... thanks Mario...

Tari turns to Heavy, the cab driver "Driver, how long till we're there?"

No response as Heavy just sits there, menacingly...

"Well that ain't creepy at all."

Tari is freaked out a bit. "...Uhh... OK..." She turns to Mario "Anyway, why are we going to Texas again?"

"Yea I'm also wondering that."

"BECAUSE IT HAS THE BEST BBQ EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!" He shouts.

"Hmm a BBQ sounds good! I like BBQs." (If you don't just change this dialogue)

"But... Mario, I recently became a vegetarian." Me and Mario stops. "It's OK! We can still have fun! Oh hey, look!"

Holy sh!t...thanks for making my heart stop Tari!

She points to a "Welcome to Ohio" sign. "We're entering Ohio! Why does that name seem familiar...?"

"Hey! I went to Ohio for a vacation three times! Can't wait to see it ag-"

Ohio ends up being a deserted wasteland.

"The f—k?!"

Mario seemed nervous. "Uh-oh..."

Tari seemed confused. "Uh... Mr. Driver, what just happened?"

"Yea what gives?! This isn't our stop!"

Heavy turns around to face us "GROG." He morphs into the engine.

"...What the hell?!" Me and Mario says simultaneously.

He tries to get Heavy back, but pulls the car's engine out, resulting in the taxi exploding, followed by Mario's hat.

"My hat..."

I sigh and take my hat off and place it on his head. He seemed confused but when I hand him a mirror my hat changed to look like his hat. He smiles widely and hugs me.

"Thank you SMG5!"

"No problem. I can wait until I get back home to get another hat."

Mario looks around the place. "What the hell? This isn't Texas!"

"We must've taken the wrong cab. Let's look for a bus stop to get us the rest of the way there." Tari then walks off.

"Ugh.. feels weird without wearing my hat." I pat my head.

Mari looks at my head and back at my face. "Can Mario touch your hair?"

What?

"Uh.... Sure?"

Mario reaches up and touches my head. "Ooooh... you have soft hair!" He then walks away from me catching up to Tari.

"My hair is soft? Hm." I catch up to Tari and Mario, looking around this so called Ohio.

___________________________

Me, Mario and Tari walk down the road.

"Hello...? Anyone...??" Tari called out.

She notices an Ohioan dancing on his back.

Mario is amazed by this. "Looks like fun!" He proceeds to do the same.

I sighed. "Who else but Mario to follow along."

Tari hears something behind her. Two Ohioans are having a conversation.

Tari decides to talk to them. "Hey, excuse me," They turn to her. "Could you point us to the nearest bus stop?"

One of the Ohioans emits a loud, ear-piercing scream that shatters glass.

"AHHH MY EARS!!! WHAT THE F—K IS WRONG WITH EVERYONE?!" I cover my ears. I'm surprised I'm not deaf.

"Daf*q?" An Ohioan said. His head explodes and his body is sucked into the wine bottle he was holding.

He finally stops and walks away.

Take seems to be uneasy. " ...Okay, thanks..." She grabs my wrist and runs off with me. "Ugh, this place doesn't seem righ-" She hears honking. A group of Ohioans are driving... Except they are underneath the cars and their hands and feet serve as the wheels.

"The f—k... this is not how I remember Ohio being..."

Mario rolls over to us "Hello!"He drives up to us, with his hands and feet as tires. "Hey, Tari, SMG5! Wanna ride!"

"Uh... Can you get us out of here?" Tari ask.

"Yes please tell me you can... I don't really want to be here any longer."

Mario hums "...I don't know!" He drives off, running over two Ohioans in the process.

Tari is overwhelmed and is heavy breathing. "Is this... a nightmare??"

"Hey! It's okay! Don't worry we'll get out of here!" I try to reassure her.

She looks around. Three Heavy birds fly off and two Ohioans are walking their dogs.

Dog 1 talks "Hello, everybody. My name is Markiplier."

Dog 2 copy's him. "Hello, everybody. My name is Markiplier."

The two dogs continue repeating this as a horrified Tari looks up to a "Welcome to Ohio" billboard. Mario drives back up behind her.

"Hello!!" Mario says.

Tari remembers. "Oh my God... Ohio... NOW I REMEMBER!! THIS IS A BAD PLACE, MARIO, SMG5!!"

"What? But this... maybe that was in a different city..."

Mario seems to be disappointed. "...But Mario likes Ohio!"

Tari worry's more. "Come on, Mario! Come on, SMG5! We need to get out of here!"

She grabs our arm, alerting every Ohioan in the vicinity.

FORBIDDEN TOUCH

But she grabbed me before??? Why are they now upset with this?

We all then look up and see that we are on a ten star wanted level.

Tari freaks out. "What did we do wrong!?"

"Yea what she said! She grabbed me before! Why are you guys getting all up at us hm??"

The Ohioans melt into the ground, then pop back up, zombie-like.

"Eghh... well that's going to haunt my dreams..."

Mario seemed to be just as weird out or scared as Tari. "I just sh!t my pants..."

An Ohioan speaks up. "One doesn't simply leave Ohio."

Tari didn't like that and neither do I. "What!? You can't just keep us here!"

Mario shouts. " YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!"

He proceeds to use Tari as a bat, despite her protests.

"Mario use something better..." I reach in Mario's hat and take out my bazooka. "Now this is a weapon!" I aim in at them with a craze smile.

"STAND BACK! I'M WARNING YA!!! SMG5 HAS A REAL WEAPON!!"

The Ohioans begin dancing their way towards them.

"You leave me with no choice..." Mario holds Tari on her front side, presses a button on her arm, and...

"Candice." Tari suddenly says.

The Ohioans stop. "Who the f*** is Candice?" One of the Ohioans said.

Mario smiles widely. "CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!"

I shoot as he talks.

The Ohioans get blasted back. Mario picks up Tari and they head off. They pass by a Heavy car.

One of the car speaks. "Hey, have you seen Joe?"

Mario confused asks. "Who's Joe?"

"Wait.. NO-"

"JOE MAMA!" The car exploded. We all get blasted back, and a group of Ohioans gather up to them.

"Ahhh... f—k..."

"Take them to... THE FARM."

______________________________

I wake up. "Where the f—k are we?"

Mario and Tari also wake up at an Ohio Cabbage Farm. Their bodies are cabbages.

Tari, dazed, ask. "What... happened?" She looks down at her cabbagified body. "AHHH!! WHAT'S HAPPENED TO US?!"

"MARIO'S WHAT HE HATES MOST!!! A VEGETABLE!!!!" He starts to cry.

"Ugh... I don't feel so good..."

"C'mon! Let's try to get out of here!" We all then wibble and wobble, but are unable to free themselves, though Mario does dislocate his head.

"JEEZ! Uh.. you okay?"

"AH-"

Cabbage Medic the pops up. "First time?"

"Wait what do you mean first time?" I just want to go back to normal... my headache isn't helping me either.

A farmer walks by.

Tari speaks up. "Hey, mister! Hold on! This is all just a prank, right?"

The farmer doesn't respond as he picks up a Hello Kitty cabbage.

Cabbage Hello Kitty talks. "Why, hello there, sir. May I ask what-"

To all of our horror, Hello Kitty gets shredded. The shredder gets jammed, but the farmer messes around with it to get it working again. A green liquid gets poured into a cup, which the farmer grabs.

The farmer raises the glass. "CABBAGE MILK."

He hands it to an Ohioan, who swallows not just the liquid, but the cup as well. He gets possessed... And a clone of him spawns.

Ohioans both look at each other. "HELLOOO!" They leave.

Another Ohioan looks over to Mario and Tari, indicating they're next.

Tari starts to freak out. "I don't wanna be shredded up!"

Mario also freaks out "I DON'T WANNA BE FROM OHIO!!!!"

"I DONT WNAT TO BE HERE AT ALL! I just wanted some food from Texas..."

"Hey! Mr. Farmer!" The farmer goes over to her. She does her puppy dog eyes. "Please... Let us go..."

Farmer looks down at her "...NO."

He whacks Tari with his pitchfork, walks over, and shreds Medic next. Mario screams as the farmer walks back over to them.

"It's time for the punishment..." the farmer says menacingly.

Mario suddenly gets an idea. He lets out a loud singing noise, and he and the farmer engage in a music battle. Eventually, the farmer has enough.

I cringe as they shout at each other.

"OOO VERY CUTE VERY NICE!" He explodes, leaving behind a single coin. We are all finally freed from their vegetable prisons.

Tari breathes a sigh of relief. "What did you say to him...?"

"Yea what made you that loud.." I said annoyed.

Mario smiles. "I said I liked his hat."

Tari is confused. "Oh... Good job?"

I'm dumbfounded that all that loud noise only comes up into a small sentence.

We jump up and high five.

"Only in Ohio!"

Suddenly, another army of Ohioans has shown up.

Ohioan enraged. " "Only in Ohio" SHUT THE F*** UP, YOU UNFUNNY NINE-YEAR-OLD!"They give chase as we all runs for theirs lives
again.

"DONT CALL MY BUDDY THAT YOU A—HOLE!" I throw a huge rock at him. It's hits his face and he falls down. "HAHAHAHA TAKE THAT YOUR PRICK!"

_________________________

We all run until we past an exit door. We head back to it.

"Let's hide in there!" Mario opens the door... It leads to the Backrooms. "Oh, this ain't so bad."

"IM NOT GOING IN THERE!"

Tari looks around. She spots a dumpster.

Tari points to it. "No, in there!" She picks him up and throws Mario in there. We hide in the dumpster as the Ohioans run past it.

Tari sighs. "OK, I think we can just hide here for a while till the coast is clear."

Mario, meanwhile, is looking inside an empty cream jar.

"Mario don't even think about it." I warn.

Tari looks over at Mario. "Mario, I've been meaning to ask. What made you want to go to Texas in the first place?"

"Oh, uh, I think Mario's sleep paralysis demon told him about it." He says casually.

Flashback~

It's night time at the Mario Bros. residence, and Mario is snoozing peacefully in the top bunk bed.

"You... have a sleep paralysis demon?"

"Yeah. His name's Juan."

Juan, the sleep paralysis demon in question, shows up at the edge of the bed. He pokes Mario's nose with his claw. This makes Mario wake up. He looks over to see Juan holding an advert for an all-you-can-eat steak in Texas. Juan gets on the phone.

"He even called the cab for me!"

Hey! Writer here. I know him! He is...weird... he can be nice but... don't trust him all the time. As you can see what happens when Mario trusted him. Bye!

Present~

"Welp. That explains everything."

"Sure does." I agree with Tari.

Suddenly, the dumpster starts vibrating.

The Dumpster suddenly talks. "You know, I've changed my mind. Kill yourself." The dumpster spits us out.

Mario is annoyed. "Can't even sit in a dumpster in Ohio."

The Ohioans have found them.

Tari is scared and so am I. "Mario. Don't. Move."

Mario screams, and the Ohioans begin to chase them for the third time. They eventually get cornered.

"DAMN IT MARIO!" I shout

Tari try's to bring up the mood. "Well... Maybe being an Ohioan ain't so bad..."

Mario getsan idea "TARI! THAT'S IT!!!" He morphs his hands and feet back into wheels, becoming "Da Mario Car" (Performance: F***ed up). We hops on top of him and Mario bowls right through them. However, the Ohioans return with their own cars.

"Why do they want us so bad??"

"We need to find an exit!" Tari says.

Mario looks around and spots an exit. He proceeds to drive into it. A family of mantises are about to have dinner. The mother serves a Turkey Scout. "I don't need to explain sh!t." The turkey scout says.

Mario drives through the house, killing the mother and Scout.

Mario is upset. "GODDAMMIT! THE EXIT SIGN LIED TO ME AGAIN!" He drives off as the Ohioans drive through the house, killing the father and child.

Back on the road, Tari is desperately looking for any possible escape route.

"I'm guessing Mario isn't going to trust exit signs anymore after this." I mutter under my breath.

Mario shouts to Tari. "TARI, IT'S NO USE! I have no idea where the exit is!" An Ohioan begins ramming into Mario's rear.

Mario yells. "TARI, THE OHIOANS ARE ON MY ASS!"

"Get the hell off him you pricks!" I use my bazooka and throw it at them. Some dodged it but some didn't.

An Ohioan talks. "You, my friend, haven't even thought about buying Spotify Premium!"

Tari gets an idea "MARIO! THAT'S IT! We need to think like Ohioans!" She takes Mario's hat off and pulls out the cream jar.

Mario crossed eyes "Uh... I can explain..."

"Yes you f—king will. What the hell did I told you?!"

Tari throws the jar, which enlarges.

"MARIO! DRIVE INTO IT!" Tari shouts.

Mario smiles. "I GOTCHU!!!"

EGHHH GROSS!

Mario drives into the jar, and the jar vanishes. The Ohioans begin to throw tantrums.

We all spawn in a desert-like area.

Tari raises her arms in the air. "WE DID IT! We escaped Ohio!!! High five Mario!"

Instead of giving a high five, Mario is too surprised to learn that they actually spawned in Texas. Happy, We all run off to have fun.

Mario proceeded to eat so much BBQ meat he had a stroke. The end.

I get back home. Thankfully I'm not too tired to teleport is all back home. Though now I am exhausted. The less I sleep the less I can use my power. I sigh. I go upstairs and see my children already asleep.

"Sorry I'm not home that often guys.. I will try to make it up some day." I whisper and head to take a shower. After a day like this I need one. After that I head to bed. Not before I write in my journal of course!

Dear journal,

Today Me, Mario and Atari went to Texas! Well not before going to Ohio. Ohio is not like how I remember it. Maybe we were just in another city? Whatever.

Also I am correct about Four. He didn't come with us to Texas. He too busy making that video! But I know I can't change it... once it starts there's no stopping him. He is determined to make the video he's working on to be perfect...
Well I'm gonna go to sleep now.

Goodnight,

Five

I put it away and close my eyes.

Sleep doesn't welcome me instead it gives me a nightmare.

ITS NEEDS TO BE PERFECT FOR HIM!

___________________________
Happy thanksgiving everyone!!!

Words: 3107