22nd December 2024

Not all good things are meant to last. Some things happen to give you momentary hope, show you what the better side of life looks like, and eventually move on to become your past. Being an overthinker, things hurt. Watching Videesha move slowly out of my life was torture, but I said nothing.

It all started this year. We had spent the better part of two years together. It wasn't anything concrete, yet it was something substantial. After how things ended with Evelyn, confessing my feelings for someone wouldn't be easy. The amount of energy, the commitment, the extent of sacrifices that it demanded, I couldn't gather myself to put in that kind of effort again, only to be left stranded at the end of the road.

However, Videesha proved different. It's hard to put a finger on why she was perfect, but somehow she was. She cares like I am her own, every time I am vulnerable, she reaches out voluntarily. I know, these things are so minuscule, but once you are through an exhaustingly toxic relationship, words of care feel endearing.

I ain't a womanizer, far from it. I am a traumatized person, reeling from a relationship so toxic, it managed to drain the remnants of my will to live. In the last 4 years, Videesha has been the only person I wanted to start something with. However, just like it always does, the Universe had other plans.

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The night seemed to be ending, there was hope of ending this gloom,
In the field of withered roses, petals of irises were set to bloom;
What I failed to remember was the fact that every smile had a price,
Twice the amount of pain endured for every moment life was remotely nice.

As I settled down after a day's work, hoping for an evening of calm,
But I couldn't just drink my coffee, why was there a qualm?
The world seemed calm enough, was there a reason for my apprehension?
I wracked my head for a reason, but the unease was beyond my comprehension.

"Maybe Videesha might help me ease a bit", I couldn't help but wonder,
A decision that would end up tearing my heart asunder;
Three times I tried reaching her, three times she failed to answer,
The anticipation was benign no more, it had spread through like cancer.

She called back a minute later, "I am sorry Shekhar, I was in the shower",
"You scared the soul out of me Videesha", I replied; "But why are you bathing at this hour?"
"Because there is some good news you need to hear from me",
"A guy from my college popped the question, he bent down on his knee."

Just like that, the light of hope was blown out for posterity,
In the field of withered roses, the irises lay anguished for eternity;
On the face, there was so much elation; she seemed happy about this;
But underneath the jubilation, my soul plunged into the abyss;

"Are you happy though Shekhar?", she quizzed with her iconic smile,
I lied, "I have never been happier about anything in a long while";
But the truth seems to have seeped in, and I am genuinely happy too,
I am finally broken beyond repair, but I can give everything up for you!

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