I look around the alley and I can't believe my eyes, I wish I had ten more eyes because this is all so beautiful. Now this is far better! The sun is shining on neat shops which look really homely and their beauty almost invites me in. Such a great change after gray buildings in London and the dirty pub! And they're selling such magical and interesting things that I wouldn't complain too much about buying there even if they weren't that beautiful – I'm not that shallow, after all. Potion ingredients, Quidditch supplies (whatever it is, but there are brooms and I like cleaning so I already like that), magical pets, ice cream! OH MY GOD THERE IS A SHOP WITH CLOTHES I TOTALLY HAVE TO GO THERE! I would immediately start to go there but something makes me stay on the spot. I look around me once again and I see that this something is Professor Snape who finally caught me and he looks very annoyed. So do I because I have to buy clothes, I have nothing to wear!

"Let me go!" I shout. "There's a clothes shop, I have to go there!"

"Wait a little, Miss Belladonna," he snaps at me. "Despite your flawless packing you have forgotten to pack money, and even if you packed it, it would be completely useless here because we wizards have our own currency. We need to go to Gringotts Bank first and withdraw money from your vault."

So we go to Gringotts bank, but luckily it isn't too far, it's on the same street which definitely has a name but Snape has forgotten to mention it. Typical. Well anyway, the people on the street are far more beautiful than the people in the pub. Sadly, I cannot greet them all because there are too many of them, besides, Snape doesn't let me. But they are interesting even to look at. There are even some young ones who look like they may be studying at the same school. I can see quite a few boys in front of the Quidditch shop, and one of them has dreadlocks which confuses me. This school is supposed to be in the UK, not in Jamaica, isn't it?

Well anyway, I wink at them because life would be dull without flirt but it only makes Snape scowl and motion for me to go faster. The boys do not even notice because they are looking at a broom. "Wow, Nimbus 2000! It looks splendid!" sighs one of them. Simpletons. I don't say I don't like brooms, they're great to clean, but my beauty is more important than that! Well, they're not the only boys here, anyway. I try to wink at the next boy I meet but it was a bad idea because he seems to be a pansy. He blushes, looks at me apprehensively and tries to hide behind an old boring hag he is here with. What an idiot. How could he become such a coward when he clearly doesn't have both parents? That's not how the world works! He probably needs someone who would understand him and show him some compassion. I would be great for that, I am a very friendly person. Now he's only with that hag who clearly doesn't like me, I can see it in her eyes. Poor boy, I bet she is mistreating him.

Well anyway, by that time we arrive at the bank. The building is not less beautiful than the other shops. It is white, high and it has beautiful pillars. Clearly a Rennaissance building (do you see how wise I am?). But before we can enter, Snape stops and gestures for me to stop as well. "One more thing, Miss Belladonna. The bank is led by goblins, who probably do not match your idea of beauty. As obsessed with beauty as you are, you are not to mention to them how ugly are they and that they should try pink clothes. It is not a race known for its kindness and believe me, you do not want them to kill you. It would not make you more beautiful, either. Understood?"

I nod. Oh, c- Oh no. Do I really have to deal with someone hideous? I hope he's exaggerating.

Well anyway, we enter the bank and it looks really great inside. It's really vast and there are many desks and there is the creature Snape called goblins. I knew it must be them because they don't look like humans at all. "Oh my, they're really hf-ff..." I squeak but the rest is muffled by Snape's hand which covers my mouth. Outrageous, it's almost as if he didn't trust me! But it's okay, the goblins would probably not hear anything anyway, because we're not going to one right now, they're all speaking with someone. I look around me and I notice that there are more people waiting for a goblin. Among them is a small blonde girl who smiles at me when she sees me looking around.

"Hi," she says, "Are you also new to Hogwarts? What's your name?"

"Oh!" I say enthusiastically. "Yes, I am also going to Hogwarts, and my name is Angela Ori Gami Fuku Jima Mitsu Bishi Ja Pan Dae Woo Belladonna! What's your name?"
Her eyes widen when she hears my name. Finally, someone from this world who knows a great name when they hear one!
"I'll call you Angie, that's shorter," she concludes and my hopes are violently crushed. "And my name is..."
But at that moment, one person finally bids his farewell to his goblin and Snape pushes me towards it. "You don't have to say it, I'm not that interested in a name of someone like you anyway," I politely inform the girl because if I went away and she tried to say her name it would be definitely very rude, and I would hate to be rude.
"But that was a rude thing to say," she scowls quietly when we're going away. Seriously, can't people learn some etiquette? Now I have another person who dislikes me and it's not my fault in the slightest!
But at that moment we're already standing in front of a goblin. "Good day, sir, what is your request?" it asks politely, but then it notices me and I can see a look of distaste on its stupid face. "What is the name of this young miss?"

"Oh!" I start saying. "It's An..."
"It's Angela Belladonna," Snape interrupts me rudely and for some reason looks angrily on me. What an outrage! Just like I said, some people would do good to learn etiquette. The goblin, as simple as it is, is at least polite and hates Snape for such a faux-pas as well, as we can see from the annoyed look it shot at us. "Very well then. I will have someone escorted you to her vault." It nods its head imperiously and a younger goblin arrives. "Standard Mary Sue vault, Gorwag," it says to the younger one and the creature nods. I'm confused, because my name doesn't contain Mary nor Sue, and there is nothing standard about me! Stupid creature, I bet it has both of its stupid parents, stupid creature, stupid animal parents creatures. How could something that stupid run a bank? No, really, I bet it bankrupts soon. I should take all my money from this bank because it's not safe here! Yeah, definitely. Well anyway, I want to argue about this error but by then we're already at the vault. That means I was thinking angrily to myself for so long that I didn't notice the journey at all. Would you believe that? You don't have to answer it, it's a rhetorical question. Of course, you wouldn't.

The goblin makes a look of distaste and puts on a single glove. Which again shows its stupidity, it forgot to put on the second glove. I open my mouth to inform it of this mistake but Snape automatically covers my mouth. By that time, the goblin took a beautiful pink and fluffy key and put it into a beautiful pink and fluffy door and it's so beautiful that I forgot I'm actually angry! The key and the door, of course. There's nothing beautiful about the goblin. Ewww! Anyway, the door opens and reveals a big mountain of money! YEAH! I KNEW I WAS SPECIAL! I start collecting all my money but Snape stops me. "Miss Belladonna, this is enough. You do not need all this money for your first year at Hogwarts, return it." "Yeah but I fff-" I try to retort but once again he covers my mouth with his hand. I wonder if he's going to continue doing that throughout the whole trip. I'd definitely rather he wouldn't. Angrily, I return most of my money to the vault, but if the creatures are going to bankrupt the bank, then nothing will protect them from my wrath! On the path back I finally get to see how we got to the vault in the first place, and I decided I rather like the ride in the carts. That's definitely the ideal way to travel – OH MY GOD MY PERFECT HAIR IS DISHEVELED! That was terrible, can't they create a better way to travel? Something kinder to people's hair? At least it is finally behind me and I can leave this goblins' nest.

Once outside, I say, annoyed: "What stu-hfff!" Snape throws a weird look at me and I finally notice that this time he's not covering my mouth. He notices my look as well. "I only had to cover your mouth at the bank so that no goblin would hear you. I knew very well you would take the stupid path of not listening to me and insulting goblins. And since I had little intentions of being punished as well because I would be seen as the adult responsible for you, I had to resort to cover your mouth."

"You knew nothing of what I was going to say!" I erupt angrily.

"Really?" he lifts his eyebrows. "Let us see – the first time I had to cover your mouth was mere moments after you noticed goblins for the first time. You would call it ugly, exactly what I warned you not to do. And do not try to deny you would say this," he adds.

"Of course I wouldn't!" I shout at him. "I wasn't trying to say they were ugly, I was trying to say that they were hideous!"

"Oh," he nods, "and that is a much better wording which would automatically make you popular with the goblins. It would mean no difference, idiot girl, stop arguing with me."

"And in other cases, I meant to say something completely different than you think!" I continue shouting.

"I said stop arguing with me, girl. This is my last warning." Snape says quietly and his eyes flash dangerously. At least he tries to make that impression; I know very well that he can't do anything to me.

"What, are you going to cover my mouth again? You can't hide the truth!" I exclaim victoriously and I turn around in order to start running from him so that I make sure he really can't cover my mouth and hide the truth. As I turn around, I notice that attention of all the people around the Gringotts bank is on us and now they're laughing, appreciating my flawless win in a verbal match with Snape. Some even can't see me because there is a great commotion, so some people are pointing at me to show who is the victor.

My victory was evidently so profound that Snape is unusually quiet now and goes with me to the clothes shop without a word. The clothes shop is quite nice-looking, but what I care most are the clothes. To my great disappointment, I can see only some boooring black dresses. Would you believe that? They have no pink dresses, skirts, T-shirts, nothing! A fat woman, who doesn't look much beautiful, shows up and says with a smile: "Hello, dear. First year at Hogwarts, are you? I'm sure we can find something for you..."

"Really?" I shout. "Do you have a pink dress? Pink is my favourite colour!"

"Really, dear? That's surprising." She smiles at me apologetically. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but we only sell cloaks, you can buy muggle clothing outside the Diagon Alley. Also, we have no pink cloak, the traditional colour of a cloak is black. But that wouldn't matter to you, I think."

"Are you joking? I hate black! Ewww!" I respond. The witch tries to be friendly but she has no fashion sense!

"Really, dear?" she looks at me, evidently surprised. Why do all the people assume that since they love a hideous colour, other people would like it as well? This wizarding world is clearly idiotic. But finally, she smiles and points to a stool near to the wall:
"Well, anyway, I will definitely find just the thing for you, dear. Why don't you get on the stool next to the young man over there?"

I quite doubt she will find something good, but I stand on the stool and look next to me. Great! There is a boy who seems to be the same age as me. He is quite tall, with red hair and freckles and he looks friendly on me. "Hi. What's your name?"

"Oh!" I start. "It's Angela Ori Gami Fuku Jima Mitsu Bishi Ja Pan Dae Woo... What are you laughing about?" Before I could even finish, he started to laugh.

"Now, don't move, dear, or it'll never be done," another woman, which is preparing his robe, tells him off, and he tries to stand still, even though he is still shaking with laughter.

"So it's right?" he asks. "I thought they were pulling my leg."
Inside, I start cheering. The word of my greatness has most likely already spread! "Someone told you about me?" I ask happily.

"Well, I'm not sure if it's about you, but the name is exactly like my brothers told me," he answers, with his mouth still twitching. "Every now and then, they say, there is a student with a crazy long name just like you, who..."
"My name's NOT crazy!" I shout at him.
"Now, now, dear, calm down and stand still." says the fat woman.
"Sorry, I meant no offence, but it really sounded funny to me," 'apologizes' the boy. "Well, anyway, they told me that this girl is every time dressed in pink, has a funny eye and hair colour thinks everyone loves her and basically annoys the hell out of anyone she speaks with. Luckily, they can't be bothered with studying (no blaming them there) and they get chucked out from the first year every time. Are you really one of them?" he looks at me closely.

"Of course not!" I reassure him. "There's nothing funny about my eye and hair colour, and I'm not annoying anyone. And everyone really likes me! Well, except the person who brought me here, but he doesn't matter anyway."
"Really?" He asks, intrigued. "Who is it?"
"He said his name is Snape."

"Snape?" he repeats, horrified. Then he looks from the shop window, where Snape is waiting for me, looking at me with a smirk, and gulps. "As in, Professor Snape?"
"Yeah, he said to me that he was some kind of a professor, but I thought he only tried to make himself look important, there is not a chance anyone would make someone like that a professor. What, do you know him?" I ask the boy.

"My brothers told me all about him. He's the Potions professor at Hogwarts, and from what I've heard he can be pretty cruel. They said he's even skinned one of the boys alive and let the whole class watch it, but I think they were joking."
Skinned alive? And I was sure he can't be dangerous. But now I can see that all the evidence points to the truth.

"They're right!" I exclaim. "He's definitely a sadist! You should've seen how cruel he was to me, and I mean all his cutting words, not only when he chucked out my lipstick and eyeshade!"

"Lipstick? Eyeshade?" he looks at me disbelievingly. "No offence, but you really sound like one of these girls now. Aren't you normally dressed in pink?"
But at that exact moment, the fat woman says: "It's done, dear.", and I jump down from the stool and give her some money.
"Well, see you at Hogwarts," says the red-haired boy, even though he looks at me apprehensively now.

I go towards the exit, but then I stop. Wait! What did he say? "Aren't you normally dressed in pink?" But I was supposed to... I immediately rush to the nearest mirror and I nearly pass out from the shock. The girl who looks at me from the mirror is not even remotely looking like me. She has the same facial features, but the colours are completely different. Her hair is yellow, her eyes are blue, she has red cheeks and she is wrapped in a hideous black cloak.

"THE BASTARD!" I yell so hard that the women and the red-haired boy look at me, shocked. "I don't want to hear such a language in my shop, dear!" the fat woman says reproachingly. But I don't care and I rush out of the shop.

"YOU BASTARD!" I shout at smirking Snape when I leave the shop. "You wanted to punish me because of your petty grudge, so you changed my beautiful clothes to this hideous cloak!"
"Are you completely daft, Miss Belladonna?" Snape scowls. "You have just left the shop where you bought the cloak. Why would I change your clothes to a cloak moments before you were going to buy one anyway?"

"Oh," I concede. So, I got that hideous cloak at the shop! Terrible. I want to tear it down but Snape stops me and says: "Carefully. You will wear that throughout your whole year at Hogwarts. And tearing it will not help you because I am able to repair it with magic."

This is terrible! How can they order me to wear something when I don't like wearing it? That's the same thing as ordering me to be naked! All the teachers at Hogwarts should be arrested, the pervs!
Seething, I put the cloak down at least for now but it does not cover my beautiful and girly pink dress, it covers a black T-shirt and blue jeans! "And what about this? Did I buy this in the shop as well?" I shout sarcastically.
"You do not know what have you bought there?" he responds with an ugly smile and I feel my blood boiling. "Well, I may be prohibited from harming you in any way while you are with me but I am not prohibited from improving your appearance. In fact, I am pretty sure the Headmaster would want me to help you in any way, and who am I not to do so?" he smirks.

I grit my teeth. He's really a bastard, too bad that I can't repair it yet, I need a wand. "Let's go buy a wand!" I demand.
"No," Snape shakes his head, "I know perfectly well what you are thinking. As soon as you get your wand, you would try to revert your appearance. Since the Headmaster would probably see me letting you kill yourself the moment you get your wand as an error and he might punish me by accepting more students like you, I will not let it happen. We will go get your wand as the last errand and before we enter the shop, I am going to cancel the spell. You have my word. And do not try to shout that my word means nothing, or I may rethink it." he stops me before I can even open my mouth. How did he know I was going to say that? Can he read minds?

Anyway, we then go to buy potion supplies. The tall shop-owner seems to recognize Snape and I am initially surprised before I recall that Snape is the Potions professor. That is further confirmed when he knows by heart what should I buy so this visit is quite swift. I also understand now why does Snape teach Potions – it must be refreshing to be with other slimy things like dead caterpillars or snake eyes for a change.

And so we venture through shops, my bag is slowly filling and the sun is slowly travelling through the sky. I wouldn't even know what should I buy, but it seems that Snape's taken my Hogwarts letter where it's written (I didn't even know that!). When we're passing the shop with animals, I state my intention to buy an owl (I would never buy something as common as a cat or as hideous as a toad) and Snape reluctantly agrees. To my immense sadness, they don't have pink owls but I think that a nice small good-looking barn owl would suffice until they get some pink ones.

Then, all we still haven't bought are the books and the wand. I would gladly skip books, I'm already smart after all, but Snape for some reason doesn't let me. Stupid prick. He already objected to a gold cauldron until I relented and bought an ugly pewter one which was written in the letter from the dumb Headmaster and now this! Well, I hope it's at least done soon.

The shop is quite modern, but with a narrow space between the bookshelves, which is good. I should be able to go in there saying I'm looking for the books and finally take a break from Snape. Which, naturally, I do. I confidently point to the nearest bookshelf and explain: "I'm going to find my books. I think I will start with this bookshelf because I believe there is one of the books I need."

"No," smirks Snape, "you are trying to escape me. Which, by chance, is my preferred course of action as well, see you in ten minutes."

How dare he? This time he may be correct, but this constant undermining of me has to stop! "No! I really expected to find my books there!" I pierce him with my best angry look, maybe it'll help!

"No," he smirks once more, "firstly, you did not know any items you had to buy."

"I did remember books, I like them!" I exclaim defiantly.

"That's why you tried to persuade me not to take any?"

"And secondly, this bookshelf contains books on magical cooking which is not one of your subjects."

Inside, I'm seething. Damn magical cooking and damn this unbearable smartass! "Well, I think that someone is too smart for their own good! As they say, curiosity killed the bat!" I shout at him.

"Wrong again, they say curiosity killed the cat. What are you going to do when you will have to prove your knowledge at the end of the year, I have no idea."

"It's not exactly my fault if you are the wrong animal," I jab and immediately start going towards the nearest bookshelf. Then I remember it was the one with magical cooking, so I stop, trying to ignore smirking Snape and looking frantically around for any suitable bookshelf. Transfiguration, Quidditch books, Magical Creatures, Divination, Charms, Potions... Potions! The boy said to me that Snape's teaching Potions! And we bought Potions supplies! Yeah, that's it, I'm going to go there.

At the beginning, I'm really trying to find my books, but I don't remember which ones were on my list so I stop soon. Then I see I'm not alone here. There is a brown-haired girl buried in a book and frantically reading it. Stupid nerd. But anyway, then I get the idea that she can be useful to me.

"Hello," I call her in a sweet voice, but she doesn't respond, she seems to be too enthralled by the book. "Hey, you, girl, whose name I don't care about!" I raise my voice. She still doesn't respond, so I grab her shoulder and shake it. At last, she breaks out of the trance and looks furiously on me. "Why are you disturbing me?" she asks, obviously annoyed. "I'm sorry, but you wouldn't respond otherwise," I sweetly explain to her. She looks at me and blushes. Wow. I didn't know that my beauty worked on girls as well, but it's a little embarrassing.

To avoid a further embarrassment, I swiftly continue: "Actually, I have lost my list of books, and I was wondering whether you could tell me the name of the Potions book?" Immediately she gives me a disbelieving look. "What do you mean, have lost your list of books? Oh my goodness, how stupid can you get?" she looks down on me. "Also, you should have remembered it, it was just a few books and book names are so easy to remember, aren't they? Well, it's Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger, obviously. Now, if that is all, I will return to my book and don't interrupt me again, will you?" With these words, she goes to reading again, and it doesn't seem like I can get anything from her again, but that doesn't matter, because I already have what I wanted. I take the book out of the shelf and I bring it to the counter, where I find out that Snape has already bought all the books for me. "How did you manage that?" I ask him very surprised.

"Well, I had your Hogwarts letter and I am a teacher, hence I was easily able to dictate all of your books to the shopkeeper who found all of them rather easily since many first years are buying them these days so he kept them close to himself." He looks at the book I was able to find. "The second volume of Arsenius Digger's book. Not as bad as I expected of you, but I am afraid this volume is for more advanced students, so return it. And you would do good to thank the voice which helped you on your way there." he informs me with a superior smile. Heh, like I would ever do that.

I don't even look at the girl on my way there, not that it seems that she minds. I defiantly put the book there and return to Snape, who finally lets me go for the wand.

The shop is small, old and doesn't look exactly beautiful, but I don't mind at the moment because if he wasn't lying, Snape is finally going to revert me to my old form! But to my horror, it doesn't seem that he is going to and he's already opening the door. I knew I shouldn't have believed him!

"You liar!" I shout furiously. "You told me you are going to give me my old looks back!" To my surprise, he does not evilly smirk, but he frowns and then sighs: "That is correct, Miss Belladonna. I had foolishly hoped you will not insist to look like a monster again, but it seems I have no such luck." With these words, he changes me to my usual self and quickly steers me to the shop as if he didn't want people to see my true form.

The wand shop is just like it seemed from outside. It is small, old and dusty with many shelves which are towering to the ceiling and there are many boxes on them. I hate the dustiness, but with those boxes, it looks like a shop with shoes, and I love buying shoes! Therefore, I don't object to being in this shop. Instead, I go to the nearest shelf and try to look into the first box. I'm almost touching it when... "Ah. Curious, are we?"

I quickly turn around. An old man with many wrinkles is standing there. He has an eerily white hair, which I think is beautiful! But on the other hand, he has eyes which seem to be both dreamy and piercing, and he studies me so intensively that I'd say he was undressing me with his eyes if he wasn't looking on my face. Gross!

But after he looks at me for a moment, he sighs and turns to Snape. "Ah, yes, I thought I'd see you. It seems like yesterday when you bought your wand here. Twelve inches long, cypress wood, a core of phoenix feather, isn't it?" Snape curtly nods. "A great wand indeed, especially for Potions... Now this one, on the other hand..." The shopkeeper looks at me again and sighs. "I know what exactly which wand to look for," he finally says and goes somewhere into the maze of the shelves.

I, of course, don't pay attention to his acting, because it's clear to me that he only makes himself good, he probably asked Snape to remind him of his wand beforehand. Instead, I notice one wand out of its box, and I try to wave with it a little, just to see how it would feel when I will have a wand and will be able to do magic. It quite a nice, warm feeling, and the wand makes beautiful pink stars! Then I hear a loud thud and I turn around.

The shop owner looks at me, completely dumbfounded, and a beautiful pink box lies at his feet. Snape is also visibly surprised, as I can see from the fact that he even forgot to smirk. The shopkeeper goes to me as if he was sleepwalking, and he takes that wand from my hands.

"Thirteen and a half inches long, birch tree, dragon heartstring," he comments. Then he looks at me and smiles. OH MY GOD, THAT SMILE IS CREEPY! "I definitely did not expect you to choose exactly this wand, or rather, I did not expect this wand to choose you, but now I think it's clear that you are destined to be greater than most of the people who ever bought my wand. Use it well." Would you believe it? I was mistaken! He's definitely as good as he showed himself, plus I definitely didn't inform him of my wand beforehand! And he's the first person who understood how great I am!

Well, after these words, Snape, who for some reason wouldn't stop giving nasty looks to the shopkeeper, pays some money to him and brings me out of the shop. Outside he looks at me bitterly and says: "Do not try to get your hopes high, Ollivander's words probably show the state of his mind rather than your greatness. I used to think he has some sense in his head, but that is clearly in the past." But I don't pay attention to him because he says that only because he is jealous of my greatness, that's clear.

We return to the pub and to my great disgust Snape tells me that I should stay there until my school year starts. He even refuses to listen to my objections that the pub is filthy, the landlord isn't beautiful and alcohol is ewww! He waves away all the problems revealing that it was already paid for my stay there and that he wouldn't return with me to my orphanage, would you believe it? You don't have to answer, it's a rhetorical question. I know very well you wouldn't.

Well, anyway, at these words I almost start crying. I won't see my friends until the next summer, that's so sad! I have the most rotten life someone ever had. But I definitely do not complain, someone has to have a bad life so that others can have a good one, ungrateful swines. But then I remember that while crying makes me look cute (at least most of my aunts would say that five years ago), it would mess with my makeup so I do not cry at the end.

Before he finally leaves (at least something good out of this ordeal!), Snape says: "Oh, yes, I would almost forget. To get on the train, you have to go through the wall between the ninth and tenth platform at Kings Cross. It may seem there is a solid wall, but do not be afraid and go right through it. I personally think you will have no problem with this part, though – your brain is so small that I suspect it will not notice the wall at all. Good day to you." And the vile bat leaves before I can retort.

Seething, I go to ugly, toothless barman so that I can ask him about my room. It turns out my room is directly under the roof, which is horrible because by the time we arrive there my hair is dishevelled again. THAT'S A TORTURE! At least the room is tidy and homely, it could be much worse, especially in this pub. With this thought, I lie on the bed and drift into my well-deserved sleep.