The next day I wake up in our dormitory very content. It's partly because I'm finally here and I can make friends, but I think it's also partly because of what happened last evening. The fact that my plan was so successful and in the end I got him to do everything I wanted makes me feel so good and it promises that next days will also be as good, especially if he keeps his promise and I will meet him again. 

Well, anyway, it seems that I should get up, because I have to eat breakfast and socialize and then there are the lessons, which I probably shouldn't miss because if I did, teachers would probably not become my fans. With this thought in my mind, I get up and look around our room. It's pretty nice, mainly yellow room, which looks homely and inviting. I have four friends here, but sadly none of them are here at the moment, probably because they're eating. Yesterday evening I was too tired to befriend them, which means I should go to the Great Hall and eat with them!

I climb the terrible dirty tunnel and head to the Great Hall, and I find it at once of course because I'm perfect in everything and that also includes my memory. I look around and I quickly spot Megan Jones, one of the other girls from my room. I quickly sit down next to her, politely informing her: "Hi, I'll sit down next to you because anyone else who could sit there would not be as great friend as I'd be."

She looks at me, wrinkles her forehead a little and nods: "Yes, sit down here if you wish so. Isn't bragging a sign of a not very friendly person?"

I conspiratorially lean to her and whisper with a wink: "I'm not bragging, I'm being humble!"
"Really?" she asks me, visibly surprised. Poor girl, she's obviously not accustomed to friendly people and the sheer size of my unbelievable friendliness is beyond her imagination. "Well, I still think not mentioning it at all would be kinder. But if you're really that friendly, I'm sure we'll come along great," she smiles at me.

"Oh!" I exclaim. "That reminds me of a joke! Do you want to hear it?" I ask politely and happily proceed before she can say anything: "Why aren't you that kind? Because German children are... uhhhh... because Italian children are bambini!"

I start laughing but then I notice she's not laughing but looking at me with a confused and slightly hurt expression. 

"What, are you offended by a funny joke? Do you have no sense of humor?" I ask her in a very friendly way.

"N-no, I'm not!" says Megan hastily and pushes her chair a little further from me.

"Good, I hope it stays that way," I add pleasantly.

After that, we don't talk to each other anymore, but I don't mind because I also have to eat and it's clear that we already started to have a wonderful friendship with Megan. I quickly eat my breakfast (I eat some sausages, because I love sausages and I'm so perfect that I don't have to worry about becoming fat), then I wait on my chair.

"You'd better come to class," I hear Megan say when she finishes eating and stands up.

I shake my head. I will come to classes, of course, but I'm bidding my time to come exactly on time so I can be the center of their attention. This way they have a chance to become my friends, and what more would you expect from life?

Ten minutes before the start of the lesson I stand up and start to move graciously towards the classroom. My perfect walking would definitely attract attention of everyone hadn't most of the people already arrived to their classrooms. That shows again that my plan was absolutely flawless and it will be a success. After all, they needn't have rushed at all, this school isn't that big! I, for example, have my first lesson just under the Great Hall. Oh no, that probably means I will be there too soon! Luckily, I'm the most intelligent person to ever attend Hogwarts and therefore I have a simple solution for this trivial problem; I simply go slower. Yeah, this will be it. Nothing can ever prevent me from making the most spectacular – NOOO!!! What is this nonsense, this step just vanished and my leg just got stuck in that hole? It isn't supposed to vanish, it's broken! Call that stupid Headmaster person, he's supposed to be guarding those stairs not to do some nonsense like that! He's definitely not doing his job, not that I'm surprised.

This is just terrible! This Headmaster person's blunder is once again against my noble goal! Everything is against me, the world itself conspires to make my life a living torture! My twinkling eyes which would be loved by anyone because the show unparalleled wisdom and kindness are so devastated by this blatant injustice that they lose their twinkle and beautiful watery shining tears start pouring from them. This is so unfair! Why isn't life nice to me? I deserve it!

Finally, someone kind helps me get my leg from the hole, but why couldn't that lazy jerk come sooner?? Now it is possible that I won't be there in time! I rush into the next corridor, knocking people down left and right so that they'll stop being in my way. It's alright, because they can just get up and continue doing whatever they want, my needs are obviously greater! 

But then I heard a creaky voice behind me say: "What are you doing, you little brat?!" I turn around and I see a very ugly and ewww person! 

"No, what are you saying? Why are you stopping me? I must be on my way to class!" I tell him confusedly. 

"Then you should've thought of that before you started picking fights on the corridor! Fighting between the classes, and then when you should be punished you suddenly have to go to the class, haven't you? You little brats are always the same! You follow me now!" he shouts and starts waddling through the corridor, squeezing my hand. Oh my god! I can't be touching someone this hideous, but he doesn't let me go! And I have to go to my class! This is terrible! Oh well, maybe he doesn't understand the situation and if I explain it he'll let me go. 

"Sir, would you please let me go? I really need to go to class, and I'm too perfect to touch your ugly wrinkled hand which is probably full of pus anyway," I ask him politely, but he only throws a look of hatred on me and mutters: "You little devils wouldn't be so cheeky if you knew you could be hung from the ceiling with my chains, would you? It's such a pity that the Headmaster doesn't let me use them!" I have a feeling he may not be exactly open to my diplomacy attempts, and that is very bad. 

Finally, we enter a small room which seems to belong to him. Just like him, it looks small and not friendly at all. He looks at me angrily again, and he sits down to write something. But just when he starts writing, an ugly old cat with much of its hair missing enters the room and meows twice. The hideous man looks up, says: "Two of them? Let's go, my dear,", stands up and runs away with a victorious face. Finally, the world listened to my prayers! I quickly run out of the room and try to get to that classroom I was supposed to get in the first place. After a few corridors I finally find out where I am (because I have this great mental map of this place in my head, because I'm just that perfect), and I head to that correct corridor. Finally, everything is as it should be, but I've lost much time with those two things and now I have to rush so that I can come exactly in time, which is terrible because I'm afraid that if I'll run into the classroom, I'll look less beautiful and sexy than normally.

NOOOOO, what is this! What is this??? I can't breathe! I CAN'T BREATHE!!! And some ugly, malevolent voice shouts "GOT YOUR CONK!!" so loud that I almost go deaf!! I panic, shouting incomprehensible things and falling back because I'm just so damn surprised. This is real life, it shouldn't have jumpscares!! I start to get up from the floor when I notice that the terrible voice is now cackling madly. Immediately, I know what this means – I'm done for. Obviously it's Ronald, that boy who doesn't know what is good to give to a girl, who has finally gone mad now. Not that I have to be afraid of him, especially when I'm sooo powerful, but now I don't have time and he can make me lose even more of it. That's exactly the time when to use my incredible superior cunning!

I quickly look around me and find an open door I could use to escape this deranged boy, so I just have to calm him and persuade him I'm not going there. "Just in case someone is around me, which I'm definitely sure no one is, I would like to let the hypothetical person know that there is no way I plan to escape you by this open door and talk you out of it, so don't even try to get into that door because that would be definitely useless for you, I swear," I exclaim, ingeniously pretending not to know there is someone in front of me. Oh my god, I'm so lucky that I'm so smart. Do you know how much time I could've lost otherwise? 

Suddenly, I jump sideways so that I get into the door, and luckily I find out that my superior thinking succeeded and no one is standing there, when OUCH! That door closed itself! That's not what it's supposed to do! And now it's cackling! I start to run in panic away from this dumb door, and luckily, it turns out I'm running the right way this time, so, after a minute, I arrive to the classroom. By this time, no one is waiting in front of it, so I assume the class has already started, which is bad. I wanted all eyes on me, but this would be a bad publicity and that wouldn't help me in the slightest. So I quietly open the door and go sneak into my desk.

For a while, I frantically look around, fortunately unnoticed, to spot a desk where no one is sitting. Sadly, there's only one, and it's in the opposite part of the classroom. Luckily, I'm the best ever in crawling, but this challenge might be too much even for me. Well, there's no use waiting here, anyone could spot me anytime. Quickly like a lightning, I duck and start crawling through.

It's going pretty smooth, on the whole. Sometimes, some inconsiderate dunderhead sticks out his legs so I have to stomp on them in order to make them pull it back, and one time I even pushed someone over (his own fault, of course, he ought to be paying attention, always prepared for the possibility of a student crawling to their desk!), but I think on the whole no one could notice me because I was moving so quickly and always in the shadows! Finally, I get to my desk and using a perfect and aesthetic move, I sit on the chair, as if I were there the whole time. I quickly look around me to check my inconspicuousness, and then straight on the teacher in order to make a good first impression, and that's when I notice the three catastrophes. Firstly, the desk is right in front of the teacher's desk (they probably knew why they chose the others); secondly, despite my perfect stealthy moving, the eyes of everyone are on me; and thirdly -

"Indeed, Miss Belladonna, your attempt to get the attention of everyone upon your arrival has spectacularly succeeded. One point from Hufflepuff and it will be five unless you are able to sufficiently explain being late for your first class."

I can't believe my eyes. What is he doing here?? Why do I have to suffer through my first lesson with him?? "What are you playing at, Snape? What stupid points are you talking about? We both know you waited for the first possibility to mock me unfairly, because you're jealous of my looks!" While I say that, I hear many gasps and people are looking at me completely horrified. Oh no, that's bad, they're clearly still in denial and don't believe me! 

I look back to Snape and almost scream because he somehow managed to get near me, and his smile is downright evil now. "That would be detention, Miss Belladonna," he utters with a voice which would look like a poisoned silk if it weren't a voice because a voice can't be seen, you idiots! "And you may not have noticed, but we are in school now and I am now your teacher, not a guide. Therefore you shall call me Sir or Professor from now on. Understood?" he growls with a voice which tries to be dangerous but I'm still not afraid because I know he can't do anything to me; I'm too perfect for that.

"I shan't. Understood?" I reply levelly.

"Perfectly. Another five points from Hufflepuff, and again whenever you fail to address me correctly." he nods and looks on the class, which now looks universally on me with utmost surprise and apprehension. What's even more surprising is the fact that my friends from Hufflepuff now seem to be angry over something, but over what?

Well, anyway, after this, Snape continues: "As I was saying before Miss Belladonna finally decided to grace us with her presence, the noble art of potions is very challenging – in fact, I believe it will be too challenging for idiots like you. But the rare cases which are not as thick-headed as the rest may find that potions are able to do almost everything. Ensnare the senses, bring you love, prolong the life or take it – it will be your call. Unless you are unable to understand clear instructions like most of the students I have ever had the misfortune to teach, that is."

As if I didn't think that! He's such a bigheaded idiot who thinks only he is so intelligent and in fact he's unable to teach properly. Does he really think it will help the students when he calls them idiots? But then, he suddenly speaks to me. "Miss Belladonna, what would you have if you put lacewing flies, leeches, powdered bicorn horn, knotgrass, fluxweed and shredded boomslang skin into the cauldron?"

"A big cauldron!" I retort and wish he'd left me alone, but I have no such luck. "Very funny, Miss Belladonna. A point will be taken from Hufflepuff for your cheek. Let me amend my question. What would you GET if you put together lacewing flies, leeches, powdered bicorn horn, knotgrass, fluxweed and shredded boomslang skin into the cauldron?" Oh my god, I don't know!! Why is he so unfair, why? I just wish he would leave me alone! "A potion!" I guess.

"Indeed. And here I thought that this thing I asked you about in the Potions class was a hex." he sneers. "For your information, you will get an incomplete form of Polyjuice potion, which lets you acquire a body of someone else. And I am appalled that no one of you feels bothered to write it down." Suddenly, everyone tries to write it down. I don't really understand them, why do they behave like sheep? But at least, they are not like Snape, who's just taken another his point from my house. I'd really like to know what he's playing at! Does he really think those fictional points will get me to obey? If yes, then he's really stupid!

While I am righteously angry, he waves his wand to the blackboard and instructions for a potion suddenly appear there. What, after that torture, he still expects me to work in the lesson? Just how cruel he is?? Oh well, I should probably start, he starts to check the pairs. Wait, the pairs, I should probably find someone to be in a pair with. I look around and see Leanne, one of my Hufflepuff friends, standing alone and looking quite impatient. 

When I nod at her, she sighs in relief and moves to me. "At last," she says, "why didn't you start looking for a partner before, I have no idea. Look, girl, it would be really nice of you to stop that," she continues rapidly under her breath while she prepares the cauldron.

"Stop what?" I ask her, surprised. Are you aware of something I should stop doing, guys? Because I'm not. Oh, and by the way, you don't have to answer that, guys, it's a rhetorical question. I know very well you're not.

"Sssshhh, not that loudly! Stop goading Snape, of course," she hisses, while she collects the necessary ingredients. "You've already made him take about fifteen points from us, and some of us would actually like the chance to have the House cup this year." Oh my god, would you believe that blasphemy? She's actually blaming me for that??

"That's not my fault! Snape's the one acting like a self-righteous jerk! Besides, those points are invented!" I shout at her. Maybe, if I say it loud enough, she will finally see the truth!

"Another five invented house points from your house, Miss Belladonna," says the black-robed jerk suddenly from behind my shoulder. "As I told you, it's Professor Snape for you. Would you explain why are you standing and shouting here while your partner prepared everything and already started to work? Are you trying to make Hufflepuff hit a new low?"

"You hfff-!" I exclaim angrily, which would probably have a bigger impact if Leanne didn't cover my mouth!

"Another five points from Hufflepuff, Miss Belladonna. Miss Green, I will be very grateful if you manage to keep Miss Belladonna quiet for the rest of the class, keep up the good work."

He strolls away. Why doesn't he fly away and hang himself upside down in a cave, the bat? He's simply terrible! Before the lesson could end, he took twenty more of these fictional points from me, every time for some laughable reason! Of course, that doesn't bother me since he's obviously just invented them, but for some reason, as the lesson proceeds, my friends are more and more alienated towards me and I don't know why! Obviously, he's just charmed them to hate me because he hates me! Yeah, that would be it. But that's SO EVIL!! Why he is even allowed near the students if he does such evil things! He definitely has both parents! Someone should explain to those dumb people that just because their precious son is magical, that doesn't mean that he's a prince! They definitely both spoil him mad! What will happen next, will he start calling himself "prince" or what?

While I'm busy being angry at Snape and grudgingly helping Leanne, Snape goes around the room and criticizes every pair for, as he puts it, "trivial mistakes even a lobotomized slug would not make". I definitely think he's overestimating his skill. Anyway, as you'd expect, his criticisms are absolutely unfair. Two guys from Ravenclaw with glasses were even told off for making the potion too slowly, while he absolutely ignored the fact that they were slow because they tried very hard to read his small handwriting on the blackboard! What an unfair man! I hate him, he's terrible! He definitely has two parents who spoilt him rotten, idiot! He's so...

"May I ask you, Miss Belladonna, why are you too busy staring at me to actually help your classmate?" he says, suddenly next to our cauldron. I throw a hateful look at him, but sadly it seems that he doesn't pay attention to me and he checks our potion instead. "Tut, tut, what a pitiful work. You know, Miss Belladonna, there's a reason why I made you prepare this potion in pairs. Maybe if you actually bothered to help Miss Green instead of looking around the classroom and frowning, the potion could have been passable. But as I know you, probably not."

Oh my god, he's acting as though I were at fault just because that simple-minded girl mangled the potion? Surely he can't mean that seriously! How unfair can he get?

I open my mouth to tell him off for this but Leanne once again covers my mouth. "Stop it. Besides, this time he's actually right." I can't believe my ears! She's actually on his side!! Of course, that explains her constant covering of my mouth! She's just afraid that I would show everyone how evil Snape is!

"I can't believe that!" I shouted at her in rage, holding her hand so that she couldn't cover my mouth. "You're with that vile hfffff-" Sadly, she seems to be stronger than me.

"Another five points from Hufflepuff," says the vile bat with a smirk, "and one point for Hufflepuff for Miss Greens applaudable work with silencing you."
Oh, but he's in for a very sharp comeback. I open my mouth to say it, but unfortunately, at that precise moment the class ends and since I want nothing more than stop being in the presence of this idiot, I run out of the class.

----------------------------------------------------------------

A rest. Lots of rest. That's all I need now when we have a free time, but unluckily, Megan, who is of course already my great friend, comes to me and evidently wants to talk. But I've already befriended her, why am i supposed to talk with her again?? That's not how it works!!

"Hi, Angela..." she starts.

"...Ori Gami Fuku Jima Mitsu Bishi Ja Pan Dae Woo Belladonna," I end.

"Sorry?" she wrinkles her forehead.

"Oh, you started to say my name, so I said the rest for you so that you don't have to say it all because I'm so unbelievably friendly!" I smile at her, which causes all the present boys to fall in love with me. At least it would, if they were in our bedroom, those perverts! I hope no pervert will ever fall in love with me!! Ewwww!!!

"Well that's nice of you, but don't worry, I wasn't going to say the whole name," Megan raises her eyebrows, "I was actually going to talk to you about-"

"And why wouldn't you say my whole name?" I exclaim in righteous anger. "It's so beautiful!"

"Yes, well, it sure is and I'm happy you like your name," she finally concedes with a smile, "but I meant to talk about-"

"Speaking of beautiful, how do you like my hair? Look, it's flowing around and there's not even a wind!" I turn around so that she can admire my hair from all the angles. It never hurts to speak with your friends and let them admire your beauty! That's just a little tip from a master of befriending people. You don't have to thank me, I'm just so unbelievably friendly.

"Would you please let me... Wait, what?" Megan stops in the middle of the sentence, pointing behind me. "But that's not because of your hair, that's because Gabriel is using his wand to repulse it!"

I turn around very irritated. "Gabriel! I told you you weren't supposed to be seen! You know the rules - you! can't! be! seen!" I snap at him.

"Sorry," he apologizes, "but you're bringing attention on yourself all the time, I can't really expect not to be seen ever when I'm right behind you."

"Why are you doing this?" Megan asks increduously.

"Oh well, she cornered me yesterday in an unused classroom. I was quite afraid of her at the moment, but then she just asked me to do this, saying that she locked us there so that no one would ever know that I'm doing this. And then she said I would be really the best for this job because I'm quite small and no one will notice me... Well, and at that moment I was so relieved that she wants just this that I would promise her anything. Besides, I'm supposed to help the new students.

But really," he turns to me, "I think might be taking this a little too far, Angela. Remember, I also have classes which I should attend." And then he turns away from me and goes to his room! What a betrayal!!

"Fine, desert me, betray me, I don't care at all!" I shout to his back. "What am I supposed to do now?"

"Fine. Now, if you let me, I'd like to speak to you about you and Snape," Megan interjects.

"What? Ewww! There's absolutely nothing between us, how could you think that??"

"What? I didn't mean it in that way!!" she steps back and revulsion can be seen in her face.

"Good," I nod, very relieved.

"Listen," she presses on, "your fights with him should stop."

"WHAT??" I exclaim. "But that's his fault! He's so unfair, that stupid-"

"Look, no one's saying he's not unfair, you should just stop giving-"

"Didn't your mum teach you that interrupting other people when they speak is impolite?" I huff and go away to my room. Certain people can be very rude!

-----------------------------------------------------------

"Now listen to me," says McGonagall. Because this castle seems to have it in for me, another staircase tried the same trick on me and it caught my leg. Luckily, this time I was prepared for a possibility of that and I started to cry loudly. This time, my savior came very quickly, but sadly it was only the nigger jerk from the train, who promptly started to laugh at me that I cry like a little baby. Not only he didn't help me, but he also wasn't right, since the wailing of babies is far uglier than my girly and elegant cries! But when I told him so, he started to snigger (notice the great pun?) for whatever reason. Luckily, some unimportant guy from Ravenclaw came to us and saved me, but it resulted in coming late once again, and it doesn't seem that McGonagall is particularly happy about that. From what I deduced from her speech it seems she was just lecturing them like the boring old hag she is that she won't tolerate going late. Oh well, she's still speaking at me.

"...and it will not be tolerated anymore. Understood?"

"Yeah, whatever," I reply politely, and go sit to my desk. I'm sitting with Ernie MacSomething. I don't even mind being told off, because now finally I'm starting a magical subject without that vile bat Snape, and I'm very excited to do magic. Sadly, McGonagall doesn't seem to share my sentiment right now, because she makes us write complicated things to our parchments. That's another thing, by the way, why do we have to write on a parchment? Papers are definitely less expensive. Has that stupid Headmaster guy ever heard of economics? Too bad it's not me who is the Headmaster, the school would look so different! Oh, but I definitely will be, that's just a matter of time. And that stupid old hag is still drilling on and on about these stupid "rules". 

"Boooooring!!" I tell her loudly when it seems she doesn't plan to stop ever. She doesn't seem happy. 

"Don't be stupid, girl," she says coldly. "Transfiguration is a very challenging field of magic, and it is simply impossible to fully comprehend it without theoretical background. I am afraid that if you want to continue studying at this school, you will simply have to endure through the less compelling parts as well. Now sit down please and do not interrupt me again. As I was saying..." And she drones off to another boring thing about the ratio of calories and flavor of transfigured food or something. I'm seething. How many people did already die by boredom because of this person? 

"But we definitely know already enough, McGonagall! Are you afraid that some practice would harm us or what?" By the time I end my sentence, most people have gasped and are looking at me disbelievingly. They probably saw the truth in my words and wonder how I could arrive at it so soon!

"Ten points will be taken from your house for your lack of respect, Miss Belladonna. And be sure that I will be telling Professor Sprout of this," McGonagall pierces me with an icy glare. "And I am afraid you will still have to wait a little before you start with your practice. Much as I am tempted to let you see for yourself why do you need all the theoretical knowledge, I am not going to let you injure yourself."

"I am not going to injure myself, I am not that clumsy," I naturally object since she doesn't seem to know what she's talking about.

"Enough!" She doesn't seem to listen to reason, though. Sadly, I seem to be overpowered by an idiot in a high position, like I am usually. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! THIS IS A CURSE!! She definitely still has both parents! Wearing my perfect sulk, I quietly sit down. 

Luckily, my words seem to have at least some effect (of course, a person would have to be deaf not to listen to me), and the drilling lecture ends soon. McGonagall finally relents and she even gives us matches to transfigure to needles. Bah! What an easy job! Does she really think that would be a problem for anyone? Well probably yes, but then she's an idiot. But then, who in this school isn't? Me, of course. WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT?? You don't have to answer, that was a rhetorical question. Of course you would. I'm the only one ray of hope for this terribly ancient school, and do they recognize it? No!! It's just Miss Belladonna not that and Miss Belladonna don't do that, jeering at me, laughing at me, distancing themselves from my perfect personality, idiotic gifts, not saying my whole name even thought that poor name doesn't deserve that punishment, and all around NOT WORSHIPPING ME!! And do they let me think what I want? NO!! Every time I think of these unfair things which happen to me although every unbiased person has to admit I didn't do anything to deserve it, they interrupt my thoughts asking a silly question because these idiotic idiots... "Miss Belladonna, would you like to explain why did you start crying aloud like a small child instead of trying to transfigure this needle?"

I look up on McGonagall through the veil of my perfect tears which look like limpid eyes. "Th-that's nothing," I sob bravely and break to full-out crying again, "I-I-I just thought of something saaaaaaaad!"

"For five minutes?" McGonagall lifts her eyebrow. "Well in any case, I would really appreciate if you stopped this ridiculous nonsense and started trying to transfigure your match."

Still bawling, I nod elegantly and sob again. And again. And then I bravely calm down and without any hint of crying, I take my match and smile happily. Finally, I can do magic! I look around me and notice that no one of my classmates made it yet. Oh my god, can you believe them? I'll easily astonish them with my superior power! I stand up, holding my wand up, and cry out: "Crepitus Magnus!" A bright light appears, but instead of the match turning into a perfect needle, a deafening explosion disorients all my senses and I find myself on the ground. Ernie McThing quickly helps me stand, but Mcgonagall sadly isn't looking that friendly.

"Ten points from Hufflepuff for not listening to me, Miss Belladonna," she barks. Stupid idiot, barking like a dog instead of speaking. Someone should tell her cats are million times better just to watch her reaction. "The incantation was Acuare. I hope you understand now why to learn basics before you try to tackle the spells themselves. Mr Macmillan, go with her to the infirmary, please." With these words, she easily vanishes the small black thing that became of my needle, which for some reason I can't even properly look at. But that's maybe because my head is strangely floating and my eyelids so heavy. Stupid wand, why does it have to be so faulty?

I groan and look around me. Funny, it doesn't look like a transfiguration classroom anymore.
"Don't move," says McGonagall. I can't believe her, she bored us to death and made me fly through the whole classroom and now she still tries to order me around? I open my mouth to tell her all of that, but she quickly comes to me and pours a foul tasting potion in them. Potion! Snape wants to poison me! I quickly spit it out and turn to accuse McGonagall of helping Snape poison me, when I finally notice that it isn't McGonagall at all.

"Who are you?" I naturally ask her.

"I'm Madame Pomfrey, the Healer," she answers while she moves the pillow under my head, "and now please stop moving and drink your healing potion, you suffered quite a nasty fall in that lesson."

"The potion! Put it away! Snape tries to poison me with it!" I shout stretching my arms against it.

"Of course, dear, now drink this and you'll be better," she whispers soothingly, "those hallucinations will vanish soon."

Happy that I've finally found someone who believes me, I lay down on the bed, while Pomfrey appears to be checking my body. "Hmm," she finally states, "everything appears to be in order. Stay here monitored for the rest of the day to check that you didn't develop any internal injury, then you are free to go." Finally, someone who doesn't take risks lightly! I happily lie down and rest while Pomfrey does whatever her job consists of.

Suddenly, after ten minutes or so, someone knocks on the door. Pomfrey opens it and there is an old man with glasses. Is this how old nerds look?

"Good day, Albus," greets him Pomfrey with a nod, "is there any particular reason why you came here?"

"Good day to you too, Poppy," he nods, smiling, "I am afraid there is; I would like to talk with Miss Belladonna here, and since it would be quite inconvenient for her to go to my office, I went to visit her here."

"Absolutely not, Albus. This young lady here needs to rest and not to be disturbed..."

"...as she without a doubt already does under your expert care," he interjects, prompting a small smile from her. "Alas, I am afraid I have to repeat my request, Poppy. Nevertheless, I can assure you that this meeting is in the girl's best interests."

"You say this every time, Albus. You of all people should have known how worked up the kids most often are to speak personally with you! Which twelve years old wouldn't be nervous to meet the famed victor over Grindelwald and the second most famous wizard in Britain after the Boy-who-lived, who also seems to know everything which happens in these walls? And the process of healing isn't to be stopped by such a disturbance of their mind!"

"You flatter me," he responds, "I certainly do not know of all the secrets of Hogwarts, and I cannot ever hope to acquire them! Knowledge is a wondrous thing – the more you know, the more stays hidden from you, and yet you can easily get lost in the small part you discover. Therefore, you have my word that I will not attempt to disturb your patient's precious peace of mind for more than five minutes."

"Your wise quotes are not going to make me relent! You may be a wise person and the best Headmaster Hogwarts ever had, but this is a matter of my patient's health!"

"An admirable approach, Poppy," he says, but I don't pay attention to them anymore. For a start, it would be rude to eavesdrop which means I would never ever do that even if it could save the world, and also I'm very surprised by this shocking revelation! So, this Dumbledore person is that stupid Headmaster which I've heard so many things about! Who would have thought? 

Well actually, now that I think of that I notice that he has white hair which means he's logically senile, and that Headmaster did things which could be explained by senility, so there! Oh well, just you wait, he'll be told off so much if he only tries to speak to me. But maybe Pomfrey has some sense in herself and doesn't let such a senile person near me! So far, she's still standing in his way. I start to listen again so that I can know whether he succeeds.

"...and yet, you always end up letting me visit them, Poppy," he's just saying, and to my surprise she just sighs.

"I know, Albus, because you always seem to have a really good reason. Fine, but only ten minutes and nothing more!"

What??? HOW??? How did this obviously senile person manage to outtalk this sensible nurse?? He must have confused her by magic! But that's definitely illegal, why has no one arrested him yet??

Oh well. He seems to be coming here and he is smiling. Most likely he thinks that if he smiles I'll think he's wise or something, like that stupid nurse. Tough luck, pal, I'm too smart for that!
After a while, he finally speaks for the first time: "Hello, Miss Belladonna. You may not know me, but I am Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster of this school. I hope you like it."

"Oh yes, it's wonderful!" I am forced to admit, but then I swiftly add: "It lacks the anti-fire policy, though."

I look on his face to see whether he looks surprised, but to my disdain he still smiles and HIS EYES TWINKLE! That's plagiarism!! I have copyright on that!! What a nerve he has!! Before I can get over the understandable shock, he already responds: "Your concern is praiseworthy, Miss Belladonna, but with a school made of stone and full of people who can easily put out a fire with one spell, the anti-fire policy does not have to be so strict. However, it is definitely the idea which counts. However, aside of worrying about safety, how did you enjoy your first day at Hogwarts? From what I have already heard, you have already experienced more than most students do in their first week," his eyes twinkle again. Oh, just you wait, let's see who will laugh when you're taken to jail for your plagiarism! For now, I'll just be cunning and act as if he were my friend.

"Oh, it's just terrible! Those teachers in your school are terrible! There's Snape...", I start saying, but that blithering idiot just interjects: "Call him Professor Snape, Miss Belladonna," probably without any idea how rude he actually is. 

"No, I won't! There is Snape..."

"Professors in this school are your elders who are helping you with your education, Miss Belladonna. Some degree of politeness is expected," he tries to lecture me, but I have finally enough.

"He is evil enough to try to break my lipstick and then constantly jeer at me, and he even invents his own 'points' which he then takes off people with no reason, and he is just all around so evil! Both his parents are definitely mothering him even though he's an adult now! He certainly doesn't try to help me with my education, so don't tell me to be polite, you blithering old fool, especially given that I am the politest person in this school to everyone and no one even recognizes is and worship me like they should!" I victoriously shout. "And then there's McGonagall..."

"Professor McGonagall..."

"Don't try to correct me, old man! I was forced to endure a whole lesson under her so I know better than you that she doesn't deserve an ounce of respect and she doesn't have it from anyone! She is so boring that no one of us learns anything! And then I'm injured in her class! You have to do something!" I end my rant, looking at Dumbledore angrily.

He finally frowns and quickly says: "I promise you that I will answer you, Miss Belladonna, but calm down please, or else Madame Pomfrey will not let me or anyone else visit a patient ever again."

He waits 'til I reluctantly nod and then continues: "I will certainly look into your concerns. However, I am very surprised indeed to hear some of your claims, since Professor McGonagall so far seems to be a teacher which is well-respected among the students. Both she and Professor Snape have my unconditional trust." At this point he rises and smiles at me again. "Well, Miss Belladonna, as interesting as our little chat is, I am sure that neither of us wants to be responsible for your prolonging state of agitation, especially when it is so dangerous for a recently healed student like you. Good day to you." And he leaves before I can start shouting obscenities at him. Of course, that doesn't mean he leaves quickly – he is very old and I would never say any swear word to anyone, including evil people like Snape or that idiotic jerk girl who deserve it. I have to admit he doesn't leave as slowly as I would expect from him, but I would definitely leave quicker. Oh well. What an idiot.

I slowly sink back into my pillows and close my eyes. After all, Pomfrey is right, I have to rest. But don't think that is all! Even though the students are jerkish, teachers incompetent and the Headmaster bumbling, I will make this school better. You know I will.