AN: I should be writing an essay on a forensic cold case... oops
TW: This episode as you will know is a serious episode which deals with thoughts and acts of suicide. Please read with care. 
words: 2506 

First published: 12th November 2017
Last updated: 16th November 2021

The sun had gone down and the moon had come up. Thankfully it wasn't a full moon but with the events that were about to unfold, it might as well have been. Selene was shaken awake.
"W..w...what is it?" her voice was laced with Sleep. She was prepared to fight. She looked around and was confused by her surroundings. Through the bus window she could see a neon sign. Stiles lead her off the bus with the other students. Coach announced loudly to the group of students.

"Listen up. The meet's been pushed till tomorrow. This is the closest motel with the most vacancies and least amount of good judgment when it comes to accepting a bunch of degenerates like yourselves. You'll be pairing up. Choose wisely." He began to hand out the keys.

"And I'll have no sexual perversions perpetrated by you little deviants. Got that? Keep your dirty little hands to your dirty little selves!" Selene, Allison and Lydia walked forward and saw there was only one key left.
"You three. Will be getting a room together. I won't ask why you are even here. You aren't even on the team." Selene took the key from coach.
"Sometimes coach. It's better not to know." Selene admitted. Coach shrugged off before walking to his own room. "Just so it's clear. I'm not sharing a bed with Allison. I'm also sleeping with one eye open." Selene tried to joke. 

When no one responded Selene turned around and saw Lydia stood there. She looked lost. Allison turned to look at them too.
"Lydia?" Allison asked the frozen girl.
"I don't like this place." Lydia said with a warning tone.
"I don't think the people who run this place like this place." Allison laughed.
"No." Selene said. "She's right. There is something wrong with this place." Selene looked down at her arms and saw the bumps on her skin rising.
"Come on you guys!" Allison said trying to get the mood back. "It's only for one night!"
"A lot can happen in one night." Lydia replied.

They stepped into their room and their eyes almost immediately began to itch because of the stench of smoke. It was so strong. The smell was somehow both fresh and stale. Allison and Lydia agreed to share a bed with Selene sleeping in the other. The three girls just sat in silence for a while. 

Lydia didn't like the vibe of this place. Something was wrong. Allison felt awkward. Today did not go as planned. Selene kept losing herself in the thought of Derek's death. The last time she saw his face she was in pain. She should have done more. She should have listened to Scott. Derek had just found out that he had an entire sister that he didn't know about. His emotions were all over the place.  

"Argh!" Selene moaned rubbing her temples. "I have a really bad headache and the smell of damned smoke isn't helping me right now!" She shouted. When she noticed the two girls flinch she apologized.
"How about. I go get some new towels that don't smell like smoke?" Lydia suggested looking at Allison. They had never seen Selene act like this... or at least like this while looking like herself. Lydia had seen first hand what Selene looked like when she was out of control.

"I have some pain killers if you need them?" Allison said.
"I don't even know if they work." Selene snapped. "Plus why would you even care. You wanted to put an arrow straight through my head. That would have been a worse headache." 
"Selene..." Allison started. Lydia shot up from her seat. 
"I'm going to go get those towels now." Allison looked at Lydia with disbelief. Lydia shrugged. 

While Lydia left to get new towels and Allison snuck out into the bathroom to take a quick shower. Selene couldn't take it anymore and left the room slamming the door. She didn't care to look back to see if she had broken the lock. The fresh air didn't do much to help with the headache. On her walk she bumped into Boyd... Literally. His body size almost knocked her to her feet.

"Hey! What the shit Boyd!" Selene shouted.
"Sorry." Boyd replied. He began to walk away but Selene pushed him.
"I don't mean now dumbass. I mean the crap you pulled on the bus? What were you going to do? Take down an alpha all by yourself! 'Cause God knows I wouldn't help you!"
"Yeah! You are known for that! Not helping me!" He growled. "Why are you shouting at me? Why not Isaac who actually went for the guy!"

"Fine. I'll go talk to him too!" She began to walk in the direction of Isaac's room.
"Okay mom!" Boyd shouted as she walked away.
"Excuse me?" Selene turned around and looked at Boyd right in the eye. He wandered off before she could say anything. She was angry. Her nails dug into her palms and she began to bleed. What was wrong with her? 

She had never acted like this before. She looked around and couldn't remember which room was Isaac's. Maybe it was somewhere on the top floor? The top floor seemed like a good idea. Then she could work her way down if it didn't work... No, if she couldn't find him. She shook her head. If what didn't work?   

"You could never be a mom." A familiar voice said. Selene looked around and there was no one there. "Pathetic. How could you be a mom when you wouldn't let your mom be one. Your mom was so happy before you were born."
"Whoever you are! You need to shut up!" Selene shouted.
"All she wanted was a happy family. She wanted to be with the man she loved, and she wanted to watch her children grow old and happy together. But you ruined that."

"How did I ruin it?" Her voice faltered. She was fighting back the tears.
"You took the man she loved away from her. She couldn't even look at him once you showed your powers. She was scared of you. She was scared of the abomination she had created."
"I didn't! She loved me. She did what she did out of love not fear!"
"Your own siblings never knew they had another sister. You and your stupid powers."
"Stop it please!"

"Your father died alone and in fear. The flames torched his skin and he died. You saw his face as he died. Your Uncle Peter gave you the memories. His face as he died was one of pain and remorse. Your mother was already dead. His pack burning. His only regret in life was leaving you to wreak havoc on the world. He wouldn't be there to control you and all he felt was disappointment. As if all your future victims would be on his shoulders." 

Selene fell to the floor. She covered her ears. She began to rock back and forth. She was mumbling to herself.
"You failed to save your sisters life. Laura. You failed to save Derek. Who will you fail to save next time? Scott? Allison? Lydia... How about Stiles?"
"No! You stay away from him! Don't touch him!"
"I can't hurt him. Only you can. I am just a voice in your head. But there is a way to save him. There is a way to save them all."
"What is it? I'll do anything!" She was desperate. She wanted her friends to be safe. She wanted Stiles to be safe.

"Jump off the roof. End it now and let them live a happy life. Don't let your father's fears become a reality. Jump now before you can hurt anyone else. Let Stiles be with Lydia. The one girl he has ever loved. Let Scott not worry about the next time you go off the rails. Don't let the white wolf live." The voice stopped. It was right. 

Selene stood up and began to climb the closest stairs. She was on the top floor but there was still a way to get to the roof. Her feet causing a metallic echo across the motel. She reached the roof. She looked down at the floor. The moon was causing a reflection on the ground. She looked up at the moon. It truly was a beautiful sight. She could understand why so many cultures wrote myths about it. Why her father named her after the moon, before he knew what a monster she would become. Why mankind would risk their lives just to put their feet on the surface. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and stepped forward. Before she could fall someone grabbed her.

"NO!" she screamed trying to get free. "I need to do this! Let me go!"
"Selene stop!" Stiles shouted wrestling with her. She was strong but he wouldn't let her kill herself. If she pulled him over the ledge too then that would be okay. He wouldn't let that happen. "Lydia now!" He commanded the strawberry blonde. The next thing Selene knew there was a blinding red light in her face and she could feel herself calming down.

She fell into Stiles' arms rather than fighting him. Stiles let out a sigh of relief and held her close to his chest. He rocked her slightly. 
"Stiles we have to go." Lydia said softly. She understood how Stiles felt right now. Jackson had almost died only a few months ago. The relief she had felt when he survived. But they still needed to protect the other wolves from what was going on. 

"Come on Selene." Stiles said gently pulling her to her feet. Lydia began to ran back towards the stairs while Stiles followed her.
"Can someone explain what is happening to me?" Selene frantically asked. It's not every day she tries to kill herself. The three of them were rushing down the stairs.

"Something is happening to all the wolves. You, Isaac, Boyd and Ethan. All of you are going crazy!" Stiles explained. Allison met them on the last set of stairs.
"I can't find Scott anywhere." She exclaimed.
"It's happening to him too, isn't it?" Selene asked,
"It has to be." Lydia confirmed. She turned to Stiles. "Didn't you say there was another flare on the bus?"
"Yeah. I'll get it." 

But before he could run ahead of them, they all stopped dead in their tracks. Scott already had the flare. And he was dripping wet. Gasoline.
"Scott?" Allison tried to get his attention. "Scott?" She tried again. Nothing.
"There's no hope." He finally said. Allison stepped forward.
"What do you mean, Scott? There's always hope." Selene grabbed onto Stiles arm. None of them knew what to do.

"Not for me. Not for Derek."
"Derek wasn't your fault. You know Derek wasn't your fault."
"Every time I try to fight back, it just gets worse. People keep getting hurt. People keep getting killed."
"Scott, listen to me, okay?" Stiles stepped forward. Selene let go of his arm. "This isn't you, all right? This is someone inside your head telling you to do this. Okay? Now..."

"What if it isn't?" Scott interrupted. "What if it is just me? What if doing this is actually the best thing that I could do for everyone else? It all started that night, the night I got bitten. You remember the way it was before that? You and me, we were... we were nothing. We weren't popular. We weren't good at lacrosse. We weren't important. We were no one. Maybe I should just be no one again. No one at all." Scott's hand moved to drop the flare. Stiles had tears running down his face.

"Scott, just listen to me, okay?" He took another step towards Scott. "You're not no one. Okay? You're someone, you're... Scott, you're my best friend. Okay? And I need you." Another step. "Scott, you're my brother. All right, so... so if you're gonna do this," He took the final step and was in the gasoline too. "Then... I think you're just gonna have to take me with you." He took the flare from Scott. The girls held their breath. "All right?" Stiles threw the flare away from Scott and everyone released their breath. Suddenly there was a breeze and the flare rolled back to the boys and began to light the fluid.
"NO!" Lydia and Selene shouted. All three girls ran forward and pushed the boys away. The gasoline lit and there was a large flame. They were safe.

They fell asleep on the bus. There was no way they would sleep in that motel. They had no idea what caused all of the wolves to go crazy and they wouldn't risk it. Coach climbed up into the bus and saw the 7 sleeping students.
"I don't want to know. I really don't want to know," They began to sit up and pay attention as more and more teens go on the bus. "But in case you missed the announcement, the meet's cancelled, so we're heading home. Pack it in. Pack it in!"

Ethan came over to them and sat down.
"I don't know what happened last night, but I'm pretty sure you saved my life."
"Actually, I saved your life," Stiles butted in. Ethan glared at him. "But not that it matters that much. It's just... it's minor detail."
"So..." Ethan continued. "I'm gonna give you something. We're pretty sure Derek's still alive." Selene sat forward in shock. Scott and her shared a look, "But he killed one of ours. That means one of two things can happen. Either he joins our pack..."

"and kills his own." Scott added. That was the only way you could join the pack of Alphas.
"Or Kali goes after him, and we kill him. That's the way it works."
"You know, your little code of ethics there is sort of barbaric, just F.Y.I." Ethan stood up and began to walk to the back of the bus. Lydia looked like she suddenly had a thought. 

"Coach, can I see your whistle for a second?" Lydia stood up and took the whistle off coach before he could protest.
"Hey, I'm gonna need that back." Lydia sat down and blew the whistle covering the hole. She pulled her hand away and there was a purple powder in her hand.
"Wolfsbane." She identified.

"So every time the coach blew the whistle on the bus, Scott, Selene, Isaac, Boyd..."
"and Ethan."
"We all inhaled it."
"You were all poisoned by it."
"So that's how the Darach got in their heads. That's how he did it." Stiles grabbed the whistle from Lydia and promptly threw it out of the window.
"Hey, hey, hey, hey! Stilinski!"