"OY, feeling gwapo. Pwedeng pahiram ng jacket? Ang lamig kasi, e," sabi ni Hailey kay Migo pagkatapos niya 'tong itapik.

"Jackey," Inggo mutters, hoping that would finally make Migo look at him.

Pero wala pa ring nagawa 'yon. Hinarap ni Migo si Hailey. "Nilalamig din ako."

Clearly, wala siya sa mood maging friendly o polite.

Nanlaki ang mata ng kaklase nila as she points at Migo's hand. "Huy! Ba't dumudugo kamay mo?"

Migo pushes his tongue inside his cheek.

Inggo turns to her with a charming smile, gesturing dramatically to his face.

Hailey sighs, eyebrows furrowing. She takes Migo's hand and inspects his knuckles. "'Di ko alam kung ano nangyari sa inyo, pero Migo, sama ka sa 'kin, ayusin ko 'yang kamay mo. You can talk to me—"

"No need." He snatches his hand back and stands up to take his bag. "Mag-aral na lang tayo, may isa pa tayong test bukas."

Ah, yes. The test Inggo is sure the both of them failed.

Tumalikod si Migo at dumiretso palabas ng classroom.

Inggo closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before sprinting after him, ignoring Hailey's calls.

"Migo, sandale."

"Putangina mo, gago, lumayo ka sa 'kin bago kita patayin," he snaps without turning around.

"Migo!" Inggo grabs his wrist and manages to pull him inside an empty classroom before he yanks his arm away. His eyes meet his and Inggo has never, ever seen his best friend look like this.

Na parang hindi niya kilala si Inggo.

"It's not what you think," Inggo starts, his brain scrambling and his heart pounding. He's had this conversation with Migo over and over in his head, preparing for when Rinn was finally ready to tell him about them, pero walang naalala si Inggo sa mga p-in-ractice niya. He's blank. His heart comes rushing out of his tongue instead. "We're together in a very serious and exclusive relationship."

"The hell you are," Migo hisses, throwing his bag on the floor and balling his hands into fists by his side. "You—you—I have seen more girls enter and leave our condo unit more times than I would've liked after a good time in your bed, nagpapalit ka ng mga babae faster than you change your underwear, nakita kitang mag-pretend na may gusto sa isang sophomore no'ng freshmen tayo tapos you dropped her the second you got your dick out of her. Tapos ngayon sasabihin mong seryoso ka? Nagpaka-exclusive ka? Ikaw?"

Inggo's jaw clenches. "That was the past. Hindi ko i-de-deny na hindi ko ginawa 'yon pero 'yon nga lang 'yon, Migo—the past. Nagbago ako. Nagbago ako dahil kay Ri—"

Migo charges towards him and grabs him by the collar of his uniform, fury etched into every line of his face and in every breath he takes. "Don't you fucking say her name. You don't deserve to."

"She is a grown woman, Migo," Inggo bites out, not intending to fight back or defend himself. Pinapaalala ni Inggo sa sarili niya that Migo is Rinn's dad in every sense of the word and in all the ways that matter. He adores Rinn. He's protected her all his life. "Alam kong kuya ka niya, para ka na rin niyang tatay, pero she can make her own decisions and she chooses me."

"Hindi pwedeng ikaw, Inggo!" Migo nearly shouts, the veins in his neck popping. "Hindi—God, you—pinagkatiwalaan kita! I trusted you not to—you—you could have had any other girl! Bakit kapatid ko pa, gago? Tapos—tapos sa kama mo pa?"

Migo barely gets the last few words out, deranged, breathing heavily, almost ramming Inggo's neck against the wall.

"She was there because she wanted to be there. She chose to be there," Inggo tells him through his teeth. "I respect your sister, Migo."

The sarcasm drips in the venom of his tone when he says, "Ah, so you were respectfully sleeping with my sister."

"It was her choice, it has always been her choice. And she chooses me, Migo. Intindihin mo 'yon kasi hindi 'yon magbabago."

Migo bangs him against the wall. "Ikaw nga ang pinili niya pero pipiliin mo ba siya?!"

"Oo!" Inggo shouts back, pushing him. "Oo, Migo! She loves me and I—"

Migo stares at him.

Inggo swallows thickly. "I am doing my best to be good to her."

"Your best isn't fucking enough," Migo tells him quietly. "Hindi mo man masabi na mahal mo siya."

"Hindi ko sasabihin 'yon para lang i-convince kita na totoo ang nararamdaman ko," Inggo says. "Namin. And she deserves to hear it first from me."

"You don't know what she deserves. Tatalikuran mo lang siya, Inggo," Migo whispers, his voice cracking as he slumps against the wall. His head bows as he puts his face in his hands. "Tatalikuran mo lang siya at ako na naman ang...ako na naman ang magpupulot ng bawat piraso ng puso na sisirain mo lang. Ulit. Hindi ko mapapatawad ang sarili ko, Inggo, kung magtanong na naman siya sa 'kin kung may mali ba sa kanya kaya ka umalis. Kung maririnig ko na naman siyang umiyak para sa isang taong hindi naman siya pinili o kayang panindigan o ipaglaban. I can't let her go through that again. I won't."

"Ano sa tingin mo ang ginagawa ko ngayon, Migo?" Inggo whispers back, his back crashing against the opposite wall. "Hindi ako aalis. Hindi ko siya tatalikuran. Hindi ko gagawin ang ginawa ng tatay n'yo sa kanya. She already tried to push me away pero hindi ako gumalaw. Naghintay akong isang taon para sagutin niya ako and I would've waited longer, even for a fucking lifetime, if she asked. Ito na 'yon, Migo. Siya na. Kung may masasaktan man dito, I promise you it won't be her."

*

Kailangan na talaga palitan ni Inggo ang door code niya.

Kingina. Nahuli pa sila the morning after.

Hindi man lang tuwing date? Hindi man lang no'ng nag-aaral sila? Kailangan talaga na hubad na hubad sila pareho ni Rinn?

Tanginang 'yan. Malas, ampota.

"Pahinging isa pang bote," utos ni Jiya sa kanya. Namumula na 'to.

"Tama na, nalalasing ka na."

"Isa pa!" she shouts.

"Aray, putangina." Inggo covers his ears and drags his feet to the ref, sighing. "Patay na nga ako kay Salas, papatayin niya pa ako lalo."

Na-shock na yata sa galit ang buong pagkatao ni Migo na pati kahit sa girlfriend niya, si Hailey ang d-in-efend.

Inggo opens the bottle and hands it to her. Jiya smiles, sighing deeply. "Inggo, seryoso ka kay Mau?"

"Oo," he says immediately, returning to his books. Bwisit, may test pa siya bukas kahit in-e-execute na siya. "I know what my friends all think of me, and for years, gano'n nga ako na gago, and I won't deny it. Pero iba na 'to. Iba siya. I'm trying my best to be good to her. Kailangan ko na lang siguro i-convince si Migs."

Hindi pa raw niya kinakausap si Rinn. Kanina pa umiiyak.

He clenches his eyes shut and fists the pen in his hand at the squeeze of his heart.

Okay lang kung i-resent na siya ni Migo for the rest of their lives. Okay lang kung hindi na maibalik sa dati ang friendship nila.

Pero ang hindi makakaya ni Inggo is ang masira ang relationship ni Rinn at Migo nang dahil sa kanya. Hindi pwede.

Jiya slurs, "Ang cute mo naman."

Inggo smacks her kasi hindi naman cute ang thoughts niya. "Shut up."

She leans forward to hug him and Inggo, surprised, freezes. "Mabait ka na kaibigan," she tells him softly. "Para na talaga kitang kapatid, so if you say na seryoso ka kay Mau, I believe you. Basta masaya kayo, I'm happy."

Si Jiya...hindi naman talaga sila close no'ng una.

Takot si Inggo sa kanya no'n. Ang lutong magmura, hindi pwedeng kausapin sa umaga nang wala pang kape, tapos akala mo galit siya sa 'yo 'pag tinitingnan ka niya dahil sa resting bitch face niya kahit hindi naman.

Pero isang taas lang ng kilay nito o kaya irap...sheesh.

Tapos no'ng time na kailangan niya si Migo at nando'n siya kay Elois sa hospital, nakita ni Inggo ang side ni Jiya na hindi pa niya nakikita sa kanya—the vulnerable, the scared, the brave.

Kaya sinundan-sundan niya si Jiya sa mga classes niya no'n at pinigilan ang kung sino mang hahawak ng wrist niya. Tapos kumapit na si Inggo sa friendship nila at hindi na umalis.

Tapos no'ng nag-med school sila ni Migo, pinapalitan ni Jiya ang bedsheets sa guest room every week kasi bigla na lang sumusulpot si Inggo para mag-aral do'n. Kapag gumagawa siya ng baon at kape para kay Migo, mayro'n din for Inggo. She hugs him when he's tired and makes him coffee the way he likes it 'pag nahuhuli niyang gising pa siya sa couch. She sends him good luck texts din kapag may test sila at nang minsanang nandito siya sa condo niya, nagdala siya ng limang bag ng groceries kasi "sobra, ang dami kong binili so sa 'yo na."

Pero kahit nga gano'n, mahal niya si Migo. Hindi naman in-expect ni Inggo na she'd take his side kasi boyfriend niya 'yon, e. Pero no'ng sinabi ni Inggo sa kanya this morning na

ji, ill fix this with migo. pero paniwalaan mo naman ako.

if not for me, then for rinn.

hindi niya inakalang sasagutin siya ni Jiya ng

Ji Best Bro: i believe you, i believe both of you. clean your wounds tapos mag-aral ka kasi may test ka pa na hindi mo pwedeng i-miss and ibagsak. tawagan mo ko mamaya if may kailangan ka.

Walang alinlangan. I believe you na agad. For him, hindi lang for Rinn.

He's not blaming Migo sa reaction niya kasi valid naman given his relationship with Rinn, pero seeing those words from Jiya made relief spread throughout him. At least he has her on his side.

"Huy, tangina mo," Inggo whispers, hugging her back when she pulls him into her small body. "Maiiyak ako nito, bro."

Jiya hits his shoulder and then hugs him again. "Love you, Inggo."

Inggo laughs, tucking his head in her neck. "Love you, Ji."

Binuhat niya si Jiya sa likod niya pababa sa parking lot, inis na inis pa rin kay Hailey. Sa lasing niya, she falls asleep before Inggo finishes putting on her seatbelt.

Naghihintay si Migo sa labas ng bahay nila when he pulls up. Taking a deep breath, he parks the car and steps down, opening the passenger door. Pero bago pa niya buhatin ulit si Jiya, sabi ni Migo, "Ako na."

Inggo nods once and steps back.

"Salamat," Migo says in between his teeth, turning around.

Inggo watches them go inside.

He stands there, leaning against his car with his head bowed, a cigarette in between his teeth.

Hindi na ba niya makakain ang mga luto ni Manang? Sad.

Inggo blows out the smoke and hangs his head, closing his eyes, letting the stick dangle between his fingers.

Gago, nakita talaga siya ni Migo na hubad kasama ang kapatid niya.

Gagi, sinuntok siya tapos nagpasuntok si Inggo.

HAHAHA.

Hay.

"Ba't di ka pa umaalis?"

Inggo raises his head and meets his best friend's tired eyes. "Sa bahay mo o sa buhay mo? 'Yong una, bigyan mo 'kong three business days to pack. 'Yong pangalawa..." He sighs. "Sorry, kapatid mo girlfriend ko. I can't really leave your life and I don't want to."

Migo runs a hand through his hair, turning around and muttering to himself, "Girlfriend, ampota."

Inggo's mouth twitches. He takes a hit and blows the smoke out before asking, "Okay na kayo ni Jiya? Nag-sorry ka na?"

"Oo. Parati naman kaming nagiging okay," sagot ni Migo with a sigh. "Pakakasalan ko 'yon, tangina."

Best man pa rin ba si Inggo?

He clears his throat and says, "Tawagan mo si Rinn bukas. Nakatulog nang kakaiyak kasi hindi ka nagre-reply at hindi mo rin sinasagot."

Migo takes a deep breath. "I-te-text ko siya bago ako matulog at tatawagin ko bukas."

Inggo swallows. "'Ge. Kahit siya na lang ang kausapin mo at 'wag na ako."

Migo raises an eyebrow as he turns to him. "Okay."

Ay. Ang bilis naman mag-agree nito, ang daling kausap.

Sinabi naman ni Inggo na okay lang kung hindi na mababalik ang friendship nila pero wala man lang pag-iisip na naganap? Okay na agad?

Inggo nods, swallowing thickly. He turns his head away and takes another hit.

"Umiiyak ka ba?"

"Hindi," sabi ni Inggo.

A pause. "Anong kuko ang nangangagat?"

Luh. Hindi alam ni Inggo 'yon, ah. Tiningnan niya si Migo. "Ano?"

"Kuko-dile."

"Putangina, corny," sabi niya, turning away to hide his smile.

Lumapit si Migo sa tabi niya at sumandal rin sa kotse.

Minutes pass in silence, until finally, with a heavy sigh, Migo asks quietly, "Is Maureen your Valle?"

"Oo."

Nagtaas ng kamay si Migo para sapakin siya. "Pag-isipan mo muna, gago, pag-isipan mo nang mabuti—"

"Wala nang pag-iisip kasi alam ko na, 'tol. 'Tsaka tinanong mo 'yon because it was the only way for you to understand what I feel for Rinn. It's the same as what you feel for Jiya. I can't breathe right when I'm not with her and when I am..." Inggo takes a shaky breath and hangs his head back. "When I am..."

I feel like my heart is being ripped apart and bandaged at the same time—

"Saturday," sabi bigla ni Migo, pushing himself off his car and pushing Inggo's face with a hand on his cheek. "Dinner. Kayong dalawa. Umalis ka na ng bahay ko."

Inggo blinks, watching him walk away. "Sabi ko three business—"

"Tonight, de Paz. Umalis ka na tonight, gago, bago kita masuntok ulit, bwisit, kingina."

Umalis na agad si Inggo, throwing open the door. Tangina, ang lakas n'on manuntok, ayaw na niya. Mabawasan pa lalo gwapo niya, hindi na pwede.