Ishika's pov

"One black coffee please."

I place my order, and taking the cup I settle into the corner seat by the window. Seattle has made me fall in love with rain, I smile as another peal of thunder rolls across the sky.

I take a sip of my coffee, savoring its warmth as I watch the rain intensify outside. I glance down at the letter resting on the table. Cascadia Northwest University's logo stares back at me, announcing my appointment as Assistant Professor in the Department of Political Science.

But I don't feel any happiness receiving the appointment letter.

Sigh.

I reach into my bag and pull out my new diary. Flipping it open, I turn to the first page and start penning down my confused thoughts.

For the first time I am confused in my life. Why am I not happy anymore with my academics? why am I not happy anymore with whatever I am doing with my future? Why has everything started overwhelming me? I have no answers. I don't know what I want anymore. My studies are not making me happy. My job is not making me happy. Why am I so restless, so dissatisfied?

Maybe I'm lonely. Too much of self reflection.

Frankly saying I have lost myself in the unending circles of survival that I have stopped thinking anything else but my carrier.

I have started missing Abhiraj, which I never thought I would.

Ek din bhi baat na ho toh bechaini si hone lagti hai. Jaise koi aadat si lag gai ho.

I pause, my pen hovering over the page. As I scan my last lines. Since the night I've called him, he has made it a routine to call me daily and ask me about my day. We don't talk much, but those few minutes are the moments I eagerly wait. I miss Abhiraj.

Taking another sip of coffee, I gaze out at the rain-soaked streets.

I'm jolted out of my thoughts by the sudden ringing of my phone. I check my phone and see Abhiraj's name flashing. A warm smile spreads across my face as I answer the video call.

"Abhiraj." I smile at him, feeling a little calm.

"How's your day going?" He asks.

"It's good. I'm at a coffee shop, it's raining. Enjoying the view." I say turning the camera to show him the view from the window.

He smiles. " Give me a second Ishika." He says, placing the phone on the table in a angle so that I can see the study and disappears from the view.

He returns back carrying a stack of file, laptop and a cup of tea. He places things on the desk, takes a sip of tea and start setting his laptop.

"You seem a bit busy today," I say breaking the silence.

"Yeah a bit," he responds, glancing at me with a quick smile. " Got some important meetings coming up. Have to finalize some reports."

"Anything interesting?" I ask, curious seeing him shuffling through the papers.

"We've got the opening of the new branch in the States. Just the details about that." He replies.

"Interesting." I say, resting my chin on my hand.

I stare out of the window, watching people passing by.

"How's your research going?"

"Ishika, are you there?" Abhiraj's voice pulls me back from my reverie. I blink, refocusing on the screen.

"Umm yeah. Was just looking outside." I mumble. "What were you saying?"

"Your research."

I smile, "It's going good. We are having sessions on research methods"

"Good." He says and returns back to his work. I smile seeing him lost in his work. Everyday he calls me exactly at this time, don't know is it a positive change, but I'm taking it as one.

Should I ask him the reason? I lift my brows, contemplating whether I should ask. Just to tease him. I smirk.

" Abhiraj."

"Hmm." He's typing something. I think I shouldn't.

"If you're busy, should we talk later. I don't want to disturb you."

"No that's fine. It's me who called." He says, his eyes briefly meeting mine.

"I got letter of appointment today from the university." I mumble.

Abhiraj looks up from his work, his full attention now on me. "That's great new. Congratulations!" He pauses, studying my expression. "But you don't seem very excited. Is everything okay?"

I sigh, should I tell him?

I look at him, he's seeing me with concern. I offer him a small smile.

"Tinkerbell?" He prompts.

I close my pen and keep it aside. "I never wanted this."

"PhD?"

"No not that." I hesitate, confused how to convey my thought. " I...I never wanted to get into academic profession. Yes I love academics, I had a dream to pursue PhD from a reputed university, and I'm doing it. But I think...I'm paying a huge price for it."

His brows scrunch. "Ishika, explain it briefly."

I look down at my coffee, swirling it gently. "Somehow I completed my graduation after taking loan from Bashar. And with Ivaan's responsibility, I couldn't afford to take a year or two or maybe more than that off to pursue my dreams.

I had to start earning as soon as possible. And with my qualifications the other option I was left with was academics and research. So here I am. " I give him a small smile.

His jaws tighten, "What were your parents doing? Don't they hold any responsibility towards you?"

I shrug. I'm not ready to share that part of my life, yet. "What's the point? I'm here now. And it was me who took the responsibility of Ivaan, I couldn't burden my mother."

"What did you actually wanted to do Ishika?"

"Bureaucracy," I mumble. "I studied politics because I wanted to understand the system and the society. And I wanted to be a part of policy making. But my dreams took a back seat."

"But now?" He asks.

I look up at him, feeling tears prick at the corners of my eyes. "Now, I feel stuck. This appointment letter... it should be a moment of triumph, but instead, it feels like another step away from what I truly want. I'm doing well in a career I never wanted, and I don't know how to feel about that. I am so ungrateful."

"You're not."

I stay quiet, not wanting to get scolded from him.

Abhiraj is quiet for a moment, "Ishika, it's never too late to pursue what you really want. You've done an incredible job taking care of Ivaan and yourself. Maybe now it's time to think about what you really want?"

I shake my head, laughing bitterly. " How Abhiraj? I can't just abandon everything. And services...it feels so far. Almost impossible.

And Ivaan, I've to take care of him and genuinely saying multitasking is not my cup of tea, teaching and preparation, I can't do that."

" One step at a time, darling," he says softly, I blush listening to the endearment he used for me.

" You've already achieved so much. If working in the ministry is what you truly want, we can figure out a way to make it happen."

" No Abhiraj. I've Ivaan to look after."

" I'll take care of everything."

" What? No, that's too much." I deny immediately. It's embarrassing.

How can I ask him to take care of Ivaan's and mine expenses. That's impossible.

"It's my duty bella. And you can't deny me from fulfilling them."

" No. And please don't talk about duties. I don't want to say things which might upset you."

He leans towards the camera, his expression hardening, " What are you talking about?"

I swallow hard, realizing I've struck a nerve.

I bite my lip, "You can't just ignore the contract you made me sign."

"Ishika, that agreement necessary. I agree the way i forced you was wrong. I was angry and hurt when I made you sign it. I never should have-"

"But you did," my voice sharper then I intended.

"Yes I did, but you also need to understand that agreement was never meant to be permanent. It was about giving us space, not keeping us apart forever. You were ready for a marriage but I was not."

" And you were also not ready for any responsibilities or rather duties towards me." I say, trying to keep myself calm.

"Let me make something crystal clear. I'm not offering to help you out of some misplaced sense of duty.

I'm doing it because I want to. Because I care. And frankly, I'm getting tired of you throwing that damn agreement in my face every time I try to do something for you." He says harshly, his words sharp.

 I open my mouth to speak, but he cuts me off.

"No, you've said enough. You think I don't remember the terms of our agreement? You think I've forgotten the boundaries we set? I haven't. But unlike you, I'm trying to move past them. I'm trying to show you that things can change, and situation changes."

 I feel tears welling up in my eyes, but I blink them back furiously.   "Abhiraj, I-"

"Save it, Ishika," he interrupts, his voice cold. "If you want to cling to the past happenings, then fine. Have it your way. But don't you dare accuse me of acting out of duty when I'm trying to show you how much I care."

The silence that falls between us is heavy and uncomfortable. I stare at the screen, at Abhiraj's angry face.

Finally, Abhiraj speaks again, his voice quieter but still edged with frustration. "I think we both need some time to cool off. I'll talk to you later, Ishika."

Before I can respond, the screen goes black as he ends the call. I'm left staring at my own reflection, tears now freely rolling down my cheeks.

Wasn't it him who made that contract and now he wants me to forget the existence of the very same boundaries. I just can't, when it does exist, I can't. 

.............................................

Two days later

He has not called me from the past two days and neither did Ivaan. Why is he so angry, I did not say anything wrong? But I want to talk to Ivaan. 

Sallowing my pride, I press call.

The phone rings, Ring Ring Ring.

I don't think he is going to pick the phone. And just when I was about to cut the call his face appears on the screen.

"Hmm." His demeanor is cold. And for some reason it pained.

Ever since I've come here, he has been incredibly sweet to me. And suddenly this.

"Hi," I say, trying to keep my voice steady. "I...I wanted to talk to Ivaan. Is he around."

His gaze softens slightly. "I think he is in kitchen. Let me get him."

Suddenly he turns the camera, and I see the kitchen.

Ivaan is sitting on the kitchen Island. But he isn't alone, he is sitting with Dhriti.

As Abhiraj moves closer to them, "Ivaan your mom is on the phone. She wants to talk to you."
He says, his voice unknowing tense.

What happened to him?

Ivaan looks up, his little face scrunching in concentration. "But I'm doing my homework with aunt Dhriti." He says, turning back to whatever they are doing.

And I realised that I've ruined it. I feel the influx of tears racing back of my throat as I dig my fingers into my skin.

"Bubba," my bottom lip quivers.
"It's mumma. Don't you wanna say hi?"

He glances at the screen, then back at his work. " Hi mumma," he says distractedly. "I'm busy now. Please can we talk later."

I swallow thickly, trying to keep myself calm. "ok kiddo. Have fun with your....homework."

I blink back my tears.

Abhiraj's face comes back into the view as he leaves the kitchen.  I can the shock in his eyes.

"Ishika I'm sorry. Don't know what has gotten into him." He whispers.

I shake my head as I whisper, " How often is Dhriti there?"

He pauses for a second, "She's been coming every weekend to check on Ivaan as you instructed her."

"Check in him, yes. Not to become his aunt." I say bitterly.

And immediately regret it, I can't show him this bitter and jealous side of mine.

"I need to go," I say abruptly.

And before he can say anything I cut the call.

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Abhiraj's pov.

A certain sadness finds me, seeing the hurt on Ishika's face.

And Ivaan, what's has gotten into him. But I push my thoughts aside and walk back to the kitchen.

"Dhriti I need to talk to you for a moment." I say, trying to keep myself leveled.

She looks up surprised. "Of course." She replies.

"Ivaan I'll be back in a minute."

We step into the living room and I turn to face her.

"Dhriti what're you doing here?" I ask, my voice coming harsher than I intended to.

"I'm home now I can take care of Ivaan."

Her eyes widen slightly, " I thought I was helping. You're already tired from office work and then taking care of Ivaan....and he seemed to enjoy our study session."

I run a hand through my hair in frustration, "I appreciate your help, I do. But I think it's best you only come when it's absolutely necessary. When you're called." I see her expression fall.

I don't want be rude, but situation is already very complicated and I don't want Dhriti to get dragged into the mix.

" You can leave."

She hesitates for a moment, but steps closer. "can I ask you something?"

I nod.

"How can you settle for someone like Ishika? I mean she is so different."

Her words hit me like a slap. I feel my jaw clench, anger rising in my chest.

I take a step closer to her, "settle?" I repeat, my voice dangerously low.

"What exactly do you mean by that Dhriti?"

She seems to sense my anger but presses on. "Well, looks aside, she's just so confused about everything."

"So what?"

"You know what I mean," a hint of frustration in her voice.

" She's always so unsure of herself, so hesitant. She's not the kind of a strong, decisive woman I thought you'd end up with. I don't see how she fits in your life. And look how she has fled abroad leaving her son behind for you to care-"

" Stop," I cut her off. " You don't get to talk about my wife like that.".

She looks taken aback. " I didn't mean to offend you, I just-"

" No, you did mean to offend me," I say, barely able to control my anger.

" You meant to belittle my wife and what she is to me. Let me make very clear to you Dhriti, I'm not 'settling' for Ishika. She's one of the strongest woman I know."

I bend closer to her, " She makes me want to be a better partner for her."

Her eyes filled with anger, " Then why doesn't she know that before her, it was me her husband loved. It was me who got the chance to be with you in every way possible for a male and a female. Why Abhiraj?" She smirks.

I take a step back, controlling myself from lashing out physically. I shoot her a deadly glare.

"You have no right," I seethe, my eyes full of anger. "No right to speak of her like that, and absolutely no right to bring up our past."

Her smirk falters but she doesn't back down. "Why not? It's the truth, isn't it? She doesn't know about us, does she?"

I clench my fists, struggling to maintain control. "That's because it doesn't matter. What we had is in the past, Dhriti. It meant nothing compared to what I have with Ishika."

"Nothing?" she spits, her eyes flashing with hurt and anger. "Is that what you tell yourself?"

I take a deep breath, forcing myself to calm down. "Listen carefully, because I'm only going to say this once.

What Ishika and I have is real. It's deep, it's meaningful, we're married and it's none of your business. She doesn't need to know about our past because it's irrelevant to our present and our future."

Dhriti opens her mouth to speak, but I hold up a hand, silencing her. "No, I'm not finished. You coming here, trying to undermine my relationship with Ishika, it stops now. I don't know what you thought you were doing, but it ends today."

I walk to the front door and open it. "I think it's time for you to leave, Dhriti. And I think it's best if you don't come back. I'll make other arrangements for Ivaan's care when needed."

Dhriti stares at me, a mix of emotions playing across her face. For a moment, I think she might argue, but then her shoulders slump in defeat.

As she gathers her things, I feel a twinge of regret for the harshness of my words, but I know it was necessary. She pauses at the door, looking back at me.

"I'm sorry, Abhiraj. I didn't mean to... I just thought..."

I cut her off strictly. "Goodbye, Dhriti."

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Ishika's pov.

My phone buzzes on the bed, Abhiraj's name flashing on the screen.

I let it ring out, watching as the missed call notification appears.

Everything is getting overwhelming. I don't even know why I am making a issue out of things, but I just can't not ignore.

I toss the phone aside, unable to deal with it right now. My emotions are a storm inside me. I pace around the room.

The walls seem to close in on me, suffocating. I need to get out, to move, to do something - anything - to release this pent-up energy.

Without thinking, I grab my jacket and head out the door. The cool air hits my face as I run towards the woods, twigs snapping under my feet, until I reach the lake.

I stand at the edge, my heart pounding. Without hesitation, I kick off my shoes and peel away my clothes until I'm naked and jump into the water.

The water envelops me, cold and shocking, almost painfully so, but I welcome the sensation.

I start to swim, my strokes  forceful. Each movement pushes me further from the edge, further from my troubles. I focus on the burn in my muscles, the rhythm of my strokes, anything to keep my mind from wandering back to Ivaan, Abhiraj, career and the mess I've left behind.

I dive underwater again, letting the cold shock me. The silence is absolute, a stark contrast to the chaos in my mind. I open my eyes, seeing nothing but inky blackness around me. letting the chill seep into my bones, numbing me from the inside out.

I hold my breath, staying under as long as I can. The pressure builds in my lungs, but I push on. Just a little further, I tell myself. Just a little longer in this peaceful oblivion. It's just my heartbeat.

I stay down until it becomes unbearable. And burst to the surface gasping for air.

I'm far from shore.

I float on my back, staring up at the vast expanse of stars above. The water laps at my ears, muffling all sound. I close my eyes, forcing every thought out of my head. No Ivaan. No Abhiraj. No Dhriti. No PhD. Just me and the water and the night sky.

Time loses all meaning as I drift, my body growing numb from the cold. I focus on my breathing, slow and steady, zoning out everything else. In this moment,  I'm just... me.

The cold becomes unbearable, my teeth chattering uncontrollably. Still, I resist the urge to swim back. Just a little longer in this peaceful nothingness.

My body, however, has other plans. I swim back slowly towards the edge.

Pulling myself out of the water, exhausted I lie down on the grass, the cool air feels sharp against my wet skin as I look up at the canopy.

Lake is calm.

I try to let the frustration seep out of me, into the ground, but it clings stubbornly. I close my eyes, hoping to find some  peace in the darkness behind my eyelids.

My phone buzzes persistently from where it's buried in my discarded clothes, but I ignore it.

I don't want to talk to anyone.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

Abhiraj Pov.

I dial Aditya's number, my fingers tapping impatiently on the desk. The phone rings twice before he picks up.

"Hey, Arjun," I say as soon as he picks up.

"Bhai, what's up?" He asks, surprise evident in his voice.

"Listen, I need to talk to you about the new office opening in Seattle," I begin, choosing my words carefully.

"Okay, shoot," he says, curiosity piquing his interest.I clear my throat.

"I've decided I'm going to take charge of it personally for a while." There's a pause on the other end.

"You? But bhai, you're handling the main branch there in India.We have people for that kind of thing. And I'm here."

"I know," I say, trying to sound nonchalant.

"But this merger is crucial for us. I want to oversee the initial stages myself, make sure everything goes smoothly."

"Is everything okay?" Arjun's voice is laced with concern now.

"This isn't like you to get involved at this level."I tense up, realizing I need to deflect his suspicions.

"Everything's fine, Arjun. I just feel it's time I got more hands-on with expansion. It's a big move for the company."

"If you say so," Arjun replies, though I can still hear doubt in his voice.

"How long do you think you'll be here?"

"I'm not sure," I admit.

"A few weeks, maybe longer. I'll keep in touch and handle the major decisions remotely."

"Alright, bhai. I'll hold down the fort here," He assures me.

" When are you coming?"

" Mine and Ivaan's passport and visa are already there. I think tomorrow itself. Then I'll come back for few days to make arrangements here and temporarily shift there."

"Just... take care of yourself, okay?"

"Yup."As I hang up, I let out a long breath.

Once again I try calling Ishika, but she does not pick the call.

I throw my phone on the bed.

If you're going to behave this way then you definitely shouldn't be left alone Ishika.

Now you'll do what's right for you and not what's required. And I'll make sure of it.

             To be continued...

So how's the chapter?

Umm Dhriti's chapter closed orrrr not?

And Abhiraj is going to Seattle....

Next update soon.

Till then 👇