17

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TANYA CLOSED THE shop.

Niño and our other workmates were devastated, but not Cinna and I. After what we've discovered, we truly needed space from her.

Ngayon kapag nadaraanan ko ang shop at nakita kong nakasara 'yon, I think of all the memories I had in there, and feel nostalgic for a moment. A part of me breaks for Tanya because she was still a friend of mine, but a bigger part of me breaks for Amethyst, because she had the chance to get the help she needed, and yet . . .

After knowing that, I just couldn't look at her the same way anymore. My heart breaks extremely.

I'm sad, because she experienced all that nightmare and I never even knew. Gusto ko lang naman na . . . ewan ko. I want her to open up to me, tell me something. But she won't. I understand that, but it's killing me. It's fucking killing me.

Another week has passed and Amethyst still hasn't talked to me.

One dinner, I just couldn't take it anymore. I know I should be patient, but I also know there are some things I don't know yet, and for as long as Amethyst is inside my house, she should be cooperating with me, and I can't do that if she refuses to talk.

"May ginawa ba 'ko?" I asked. "D-Did I do something that hurt you?"

Amethyst paused. Dahan-dahan siyang huminga nang malalim saka tiningnan ako sa mga mata ko. Her eyes returned to being dead.

"Vin," she said.

Halos mahugutan ako ng hininga.

Hindi ko alam kung si Amethyst pa ba ang nakatingin sa 'kin.

"Mabigat 'tong hinihingi ko sa 'yo," sabi niya. "But after all this is done, everything will return to normal again. Everyone will then turn their eyes to you. And I'd be the reason why. You hate spotlights, I know as much."

I don't know where she's getting at. I just frowned.

"I realized that I shouldn't be really so close to you," she said. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko ro'n saka napakunot ng noo. "Once you're done helping me, I would be leaving the town because my relatives will take me in." She stopped eating. I looked down, my heart starting to feel heavy. "And I don't want to be so attached."

What the hell? I was about to say something — I don't know what — probably anything, probably something that will make her change her mind — but I couldn't say anything. She is suddenly standing up, bringing her own plates with her.

I can't explain the pain in my chest. It's like I have been punched on my stomach. It hurts . . . more than anything else.

What's wrong with her?

—

PIERRE WAS LOOKING distracted and worn out when I came to school this Wednesday morning, not the usual energetic one. He's got his earphones in and looking at somewhere. Ni hindi niya nga napansing tinabihan ko na siya. He was like that and I can't shake him off his oblivion until I just smacked his head while we were walking on the hallways.

"The hell, Vin?"

"That's my line."

Inayos niya ang buhok niyang ginulo ko. "Tagal kong inayos nito e," bulong pa niya.

"What's up with you?" I asked. "Nakatulala ka lang buong araw. Para kang engot."

He snorted. "Ngayon alam mo na pakiramdam," sabi niya na ikinakunot ng noo ko. "You've been that way this week, kung 'di mo lang alam. I was actually starting to get used to it."

I blinked. "Talaga?"

"Talagang talaga," he said. He sniffled and rubbed his chin. "Vin, I'm going to ask you something."

"Go on."

"Bakit ka naman paghihinalaan ni Oliver?"

Napatingin ako sa kanya habang nakapamulsa. Students are wandering about the hallways, being noisy as hell. A few eyes looked at me, recognizing the face they seem to saw on TV. Hindi ko na lang sila pinansin.

"I told you," I said. "He probably heard about me bringing a girl home at 1 AM. Akala niya siguro si Amethyst 'yon."

"Dahil lang do'n?" he asked. "Don't you think he makes sense?"

"No!" I exclaimed "Not in any angle."

"But he may be right. What if . . ."

Napatigil siya sa paglalakad saka tumingin nang mataman sa akin.

"What if Amethyst Cambray really is alive?"

"That doesn't make sense," I said as quickly as I can and continued walking. "Ito 'yung bumabagabag sa 'yo buong araw?"

"It can be true," he said. "Nobody said about the corpses they might have found."

I never thought there would be corpses. "Of course they're burnt to ash, Pierre."

"Really? Is that how it works?" he asked. Napatingin siya malayo saka tumingin sa akin. "I have to go now," dagdag pa niya. Napatingin naman ako sa kanya, nagtataka. He tapped my shoulder. "See ya!" And then he turned and ran away.

Suddenly I feel left out. This is the first time that Pierre ran from me. Ganito ba pakiramdam niya noong mga araw na lutang na lutang din ako?

But . . . maybe sometimes jerks like him has something else to do, too, unlike me. I guess.

"Was that Pierre?"

"Holy mother of Christ." I turned around and saw it was just Cinna. She just appeared out of nowhere! Ito ba ang role niya sa buhay ko?

Tawa siya nang tawa sa reaksyon ko. It's the first time that I saw her again, after that incident in Tanya's car. The week has been really busy and I'm glad that it's over.

"Maghinay-hinay ka nga sa kape!" she exclaimed.

Napangiti na lang ako sa kanya. "How are you?" tanong ko, saka kami nagpatuloy sa paglalakad. Nakarating na kami sa may ground floor.

She sighed deeply and fixed her glasses. Mabagal lang ang lakad namin. "To be honest . . . I'm still thinking about what Tanya said. After that I just felt . . . really sick. As a . . ." She smiled and shrugged. ". . . friend."

"I understand," I said.

"We've been friends for like, forever," sabi niya. "And yet I never knew. Anong klaseng kaibigan ako? If I don't know that, what else am I still not yet aware of? I feel really, really stupid." Hinilamos niya ang mukha niya saka inayos ang buhok. "One glance at me, and Amy already knows what's wrong. While me . . . I can't even read her right. I wasn't able to help her."

Pinunasan niya ang mga mata niya. She pursed her lips. "I know that her relatives want to leave the case alone. But I won't. They just . . . probably don't care."

Then I realized that the hell week is over. "Hey," I said. "Bakit hindi na tayo pumunta sa bahay nila?"

She blinked and looked at me. "N-Now?"

"Yeah," sagot ko. "We've stopped doing this for weeks now. Kailangan na natin ulit kumilos."

"Actually . . ." She looked away. "I've always been meaning to ask you. But you always seemed distant. Alam mo 'yon? I thought something else is bothering you so I thought you'll . . . stop doing this with me."

"W-What?" I said, shocked. "No! I was . . . did I really seem that way?"

"Yes," she said. "So I'm happy you brought it up yourself." She smiled really happily to me, and bit her lower lip. "I brought my car with me. Let's go!"

—

IT SEEMED LIKE the last time I sat in her car was a forever ago. That was when Oliver broke in our house and for the first time ever, I thought my heart was gonna explode into bits. I was so horrified.

"You know where her house is?" tanong ko.

"Yeah. Whenever we go out, hinahatid ko siya palagi sa house niya. Though I always never had the chance to get in. Kahit para lang uminom ng tubig," Cinna said with a little smile. "I never really thought much about it. Inisip ko lang na gano'n ka-strict ang parents niya."

She sighed deeply, looking down again. "Hindi ko naman alam na iba pala ang dahilan."

I don't know what to reply. We just looked at each other, then we kind of understood.

All the police had said was: there was a fire, the family is dead, and the fire was because of an accident. That and nothing else. No further investigation was done. They realized that the fire came from fault wiring, then it reached curtains, all through the house. When the parents realized there was fire, they were too late. So they suffocated and died.

When we arrived at the Cambrays', Cinna and I were stunned to see that there are police cars. Akala ko ba hindi na sila mag-iimbestiga? We both exited the car and walked towards the commotion.

There are cops everywhere, looking around the house. I saw that they saw empty petrols, and a few cops are interviewing a few neighbors.

"Oh, my god . . ." Cinna whimpers. Napahawak siya sa bibig niya habang tinitingnan ang paligid.

We walked towards a man casually looking around, and decided to ask him.

"H-Hi," Cinna greeted. "Um . . . b-bakit po ang daming pulis dito? I thought they left the case alone na?"

The man shrugged. "May lumapit kasi sa pulisya kaninang umaga. They said they saw someone leave the house when the fire began."

Cinna and I glanced at each other, eyes wide.

"S-Someone?" I asked.

"Oo," sabi ng lalaki. "You heard of the missing girl, Hannah Fuller?"

"Y-Yes," I said. Cinna nodded vigorously.

"May mga nakakita sa kanyang lumabas sa bahay na nagsisimula pa lang na masunog," sabi ng lalaki. "But everyone was too busy collecting water to bother talking to her. And . . . that was the first time Hannah was heard to have disappeared."

Cinna couldn't talk for a few seconds, but she still asked. "H-How . . . how did you know it was Hannah Fuller?"

"The girl they saw had her name stitched behind the jacket she was wearing." Tumalikod pa ito at tinuro ang likod niya para ipakita nang mas maayos sa amin. The man laughed. "We probably know who the suspect is now."

Cinna softly gasped. I was blown away.

I walked towards the car and held its roof. Minasahe ko ang sentido ko. Damn. Damn. Hannah Fuller, the fifteen year old girl? Why would she do this?

Why the hell . . .

"Don't you think Hannah Fuller is just being a little edgy?"

Napahinga ako nang malalim. Napapikit ako nang mariin. Pagkadilat ko, malaki ang mga mata ni Cinna sa kawalan.

Amethyst . . . Hannah Fuller is more than just being a little edgy.

She's a fucking murderer.

____