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Opportunity came

And knocked at my door

With a thunderous sound

I couldn't ignore

Or equal in strength

With my quiet reply

That bounced off the walls

Of heaven's black sky

And fell back to me

Trapped on the earth,

Unable to fly

Or summon the words

That paint my frustration

In all of its tears

And blood that I wrought

For one endless year

That never satisfied

The thirst in my throat

Or did justice to

The words that I wrote

On blood-stained pages

In books on the shelf

I hide in plain sight

With secrets I've spelled

Out in plain truth

And delicate blooms

That crack like my heart

And adorn its tomb

While ever in bloom;

They can't seem to die

In the world I formed

Absent of my lies,

Absent of the mask

That shields my dead heart

From the stories I wrote

And can't pull apart.

Opportunity knocks,

But this time I flee

As it stretches its claws

And wraps around me,

And I can't turn away

From its spell-binding gaze.

I'm locked in a trance

I don't want to escape,

'Cause I want what it has

To offer to me,

The bright promises

It says I will see

As my reality

If I give up my soul

To dark-green ambition

And the monster it holds,

And I can't let go,

But I offer my hand

For a touch of the gold,

A glimpse of the land

I'll forever dream

And never realize,

'Cause opportunity

Just never survives;

Though it clings onto me,

And I still don't fight,

It never becomes

More than a light

Alive in my eyes,

My red, ghastly eyes

That believe what they dream

And ignore the signs

Of predestined failure,

Another missed chance

That never could be;

There's never a chance,

Not for a hopeless,

A hopeless like me,

Who'll jump off a cliff

For opportunity

When she knows she'll fall,

And she hits the floor,

Waiting for another

Of life's open doors

For her to fall through

And drown in despair,

Screaming at life,

At how its unfair

And so cruel to her

In all of her dreams

She's bleeding out for,

She's died to achieve.

Opportunity,

It's locked on her throat

And taken all of

Her will to emote.

That's what's left of me

At the end of this day

Where my barriers split,

My cold mind decayed

To nothing but ash

And dark memories,

Shrouded in shadows

Of opportunity. 

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Missed opportunities. Often our biggest regrets. We wish we'd taken the chance, got over ourselves, our fears, our worries, our self-doubts. We wish we'd been braver, bolder, wonder how our lives would've changed, where we'd be now. And failed opportunities. Often our most painful memories. We try to forget, ignore, but we can't shake the guilt, the shame. We wish we'd done better, been better, but we weren't. Opportunity got away. It's elusive like that, opportunity. We can chase it, attack it, but we can't make it stay, can't make it work out. Sometimes, it doesn't. And that hurts.