Song of the chapter; "all you had to do was stay." By Taylor swift.

"Where have you been? Like where did you go after the bombing?" Peeta asks stuffing his face with a forkful of spinach with French dressing. I watch him stab some more, and eat some more.

"Mom! I don't like this." Willow cries.

"Eat it Willow." Her dad warns. She slumps in her boosted chair, and crosses her arms over her small chest. "Eat it." He says again.

"I don't like it." She pouts.

"Don't you wanna grow up and be big and strong like your mommy?" As nods her head and smiles. "Well then you've got to eat it."

I don't tell them that I don't like spinach. I'll eat anything around my daughter, it's a good influence. If I eat it, she'll at least try it. Same goes with Peeta and herself.

Tentatively, she lifts her fork and takes a single spinach leaf onto it. She stinks it in her mouth, and wiggles as she eats it. "It tastes like a tree!" She inquires.

"Is it a good tree?" Rye asks. She nods happily.

"But where have you been?" Peeta asks his brother again. "After the bombing?"

"One hit the bakery directly, and it killed me within seconds. Dad brought me back, but we lost mom and Gage." He says. Gage, his brother, a mere thirteen year old; an innocent citizen added to the list of people close to my family I've gotten killed. "We hid in the woods, for a while. After we knew the bombs were done, we went back into the district to gather the survivors. There wasn't many, but the few we had we wrangled back to district thirteen. By the time we got there on foot, everyone like Katniss and yourself had left."

"That's quiet a story." I pip.

"Yeah." He smiles. "But I uh, I heard some rumors about you." He says to Peeta. I know he's going to ask about the hijacking and the Capitol.

"And..?" Peeta asks waiting for the punch of the words, as am I.

"They said you were hijacked. Like they messed with your brain. Is that true?" He asks slowly.

"Yeah." Peeta nods.

"What exactly did they do to you?" He asks averting his eyes from Peeta's, instead he looks to mine begging for an answer.

"They gave him tracker jacker venom, then showed him altered videos and pictures to make me seem like a threat." I explain and steal a glance at Peeta. His expression is hard and he looks straight ahead.

"Like what happens does-"

"Can we drop it, please?" Peeta cuts in before I can answer. "You guys can talk about it some other time I'm not around."

A knock on the door is all it takes to leave our awkward ended conversation behind. "I'll get it." I say.

"No!" Peeta stops me. "The mother of my child will be doing nothing anymore!" He says with a smile before touching my cheek and walks to the door. "Yeah, come in."

Haymitch struts into the house, with a done - up Effie parading behind him. They stand in the middle of the kitchen tiled floor and she places a hand on his bicep. I don't say anything about it, I'm glad. They both need someone to keep them company after the war.

"Hope we're not intruding." Haymitch says sarcastically.

"Do you?" I cock my head with a smirk.

"No." He grins. Effie rolls her eyes from his side. Peeta takes his seat again, after placing two more plates at the table. Effie sticks with salad greens, only a tiny spoon of dressing. Haymitch eats a bit steak, potatoes, and two helpings of salad.

"And here there I was thinking I'd have to find somewhere to go with the rest of our leftovers in the fridge." Peeta jokes with Haymitch.

"Yeah, yeah boy." He shrugs. "I don't believe I got your name." His attention moves to Rye.

"I'm Rye, Peeta's brother." He extends a hand and they shake. He has hands like his brother, and father before him, hard and callused. Working man's hands.

"Oh." Haymitch nods.

*****

I lay in bed alone, he had an attack after our guests left. He won't come upstairs, or near me at all. Willow silently sleeps in the crook of my arm. I detach myself from her, and make my way down the stairs. He's laying on the couch clutching a pillow, two dark spots tell me he's been crying. "We can't bring a baby into this world." He mumbles into the pillow as I sit down on the arm of the couch.

"Why not?" I ask softly.

"Because I'm a monster. I don't want to hurt you, or Willow, or our unborn child." He cries softly. "It can't happen.."

"So what do you expect me to do?!" I ask loudly standing from the couch. "I don't know what to do!"

"Leave!" He exclaims. "Go before I hurt you, or your children."

I stop slowly. "Peeta, my children are your children too. Don't be so cold hearted." I take a deep breath. "Look, we just got engaged, I'm not leaving you." I sigh. "Just come up to bed with me." I half order, half plead.

"I'm gonna sleep on the couch."

"Nope." I grab his hand and stand him up. "I refuse to go to bed alone."

"It's not happening Katniss." He says.

"Daddy." Willow calls upstairs.

"Daddy will be there in a minuet." He says back looking directly into my eyes. "Then I'm coming right back down here."

"We'll see about that."

He leaves me downstairs. Two thoughts cloud my mind, I could be rational about this. Kiss him when he comes back and beg him to come upstairs and cuddle me. Or I could be crazy and spontaneous and throw the porch on the front lawn.

I shrug gripping the couch and pull it into the lawn. It's right outside the door, I feel a slight pain in my stomach. But I was already finished anyways. I hear his obvious tread down the stairs. "What the fuck?" I hear him mumble from the living room. I peek around the corner and see him rub his eyes, then blink a few times. Then once he realizes it's actually gone, he angrily looks at me. "What the hell Katniss?" He asks.

"What?" I hold in a suppressed laugh.

"Why do you always have to be such a damn child? This isn't funny..." He grumbles a few words taking a blanket into his hands. "I'm going to Haymitch's." He concludes.

Then he leaves me there, confused, sad, and shocked. I thought he would react so much differently. I should have just kissed him and been nice about it. I throw open the front door, and pull the couch back in. I remake it, and look towards the door expecting him to come through at any second. But after what seems like a million years, he doesn't come through the door. So I walk upstairs and into my bedroom. I pull my legs to my chest, and curl myself into a small ball. It's my feeble attempt at trying to escape the terrible, horrible world, sadly, it never works.

When I wake, the scent of pancake fills my nose. Confused and still half asleep; I stand and pull on leggings. I cautiously make my way down the stairs, to find a shirtless Peeta facing away from me. "What are you doing here?" It comes out rather rudely, more than I expected to.

"Uhm, I live here?" He says. It sounds like a joke, also a question, but also like he's stating the obvious. "Why wouldn't I be here?" He continues.

"Brags of last night..?" I ask also with a bit of questioning in my voice. He wipes his hands on a dish towel, and comes over to me and wraps his arms around my waist. I avert my eyes by looking at the microwave, I see the top half of my head in the reflection.

"Katniss I'm sorry." He starts. "I didn't mean to make you as upset i did. I was just having a semi - episode."

"Semi - episode?" I ask straight face.

"When I know I'm in real life, but I can't tell my mind that and all of my thoughts are still mutted." He says. "Okay Katniss? I didn't mean anything I said last night. I love you, and Willow, and our unborn child."

I nod slowly. "Can we stop fighting all the time?" I beg.

"Yeah baby-doll. We can." He nods, he uses his pointer and middle finger and thumb to tilt my chin up. Our lips meet and I know all of our fighting is past us.

Our lips were made to kiss. Our hands meant to hold each other. Our love, like a tornado, we are powerful together, able to bright destruction with us wherever we go. But we can bring new beginnings, a new kind of peace.

My breath is heavy as I pull apart for half a second just to kiss him again. Suddenly, the scent of burning and smoke fills my nose. I break away again. "Peeta do you smell that?" I ask quickly.

"Smell what?"

"It smells like something's burning." I say.

"Shit!" He turns around and a find whatever he was cooking in my best, red pan on fire.

"Peeta!"

"Stay back!" He calls picking it up by the handle. "Open the door!" I open it and he throws it into the snowy yard. But not before yelling from I guess getting burned.

He runs his hand under cold water. "Are you okay?" I ask frantically.

"I'm fine." He says with a reassuring smile. I pat it dry, and kiss it lightly. "Now it feels prefect." He smiles. I nod and look to the counter where his pancake mix is.

"Are you still gonna cook?" I ask eagerly. "It smelled good before the burning." I explain with a smile. "What was it anyway?" I ask.

"Pineapple pancakes with a vanilla bean sauce." He explains. "I had them late one night in our first games. After I realized how amazing they were, I memorized the recipe. It seemed to help take my mind off of what was happening."

"I wish I could have loved you then like I love you now." I frown.

"It's okay, I understand. If anyone were to have found out about us, they would have been damn sure I never came back from the Capitol." He says softly touching my arm. "It was never anything you did, if you would have told me back then you loved me I'm not so sure I would have believed you."

I pull our foreheads together. "Do you believe me now?" I breath into his open lips.

"Yes."

We cook breakfast together, and he has yet another attack at bedtime. Instead of letting him leave, I hold his red, sobbing face in my hands. His eyes search for something to remember, to snap him out, or pull him back in deeper. I pull out the pearl, and the necklace I have acquired over the years. I show them to him. Placing them in his open palms, leaving his mouth agape he looks at me. "You really kept these?" He asks.

Yes, they were the last gifts the real Peeta Mellark had given me.

"Yes." I gulp ignoring the voice in my head practically screaming those words. "I love them and you so much." I whisper looking him in the eyes.

"I'm so confused .... I thought you hated me?" I shake my head at his words.

"No Peeta, I love you." I say gently.

"I-I love you t-too." He nods. And I've finally figured it out, a gentle approach makes all the difference. It works, for the next two weeks at bed time, I coax him into bed and show him the objects.

But the second night of the this week, it all goes to hell within seconds.

****

Hey y'all! Hope you enjoyed this story, also don't forget to check out my new stories. & the one I write with LaurenRoss173 she's the bestest person ever. Also thanks for so many followers!

Xoxo Kylee.
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