❝I tried so hard to hold onto you
But you’re fading away, you’re disappearing❞

-star, boyfriend

---

kim.seokjin:
my brother was a better person

eunsuen:
I'm sorry

kim.seokjin:
GOT YOU

kim.seokjin:
XD I just made you feel awkward lmfao yay

eunsuen:
i-

eunsuen:
i really thought I've done something wrong

kim.seokjin:
and that is how i got you milady

eunsuen:
still I'm sorry for your loss

eunsuen:
i know you liked your brother a lot. and his death, i know it affected you it affected the whole neighbourhood

eunsuen:
I'm just sorry

eunsuen:
you must not like talking about this topic I'm sorry for that too

kim.seokjin:
did you tell this to my other version too?

eunsuen:
no

eunsuen:
as I've said we never talked much

eunsuen:
i attended the funeral he seemed okay but i know he was not

kim.seokjin:
what if he was really okay?

eunsuen:
you think so?

kim.seokjin:
nope just joking haha

kim.seokjin:
it still feels like yesterday when hyung left for the army

kim.seokjin:
three months in and suddenly the news came

kim.seokjin:
who dies in the army these days lol i couldn't believe my ears i couldn't believe it for days

kim.seokjin:
until his body came

kim.seokjin:
i can't believe it's been a year already

eunsuen:
are you okay?

eunsuen:
talking about this

kim.seokjin:
i don't know

kim.seokjin:
actually you know, thinking about it, you, everything that has happened to me with you makes me feel better

kim.seokjin:
it makes me feel that there might be another world where he is still there

kim.seokjin:
smiling, laughing, living his life

kim.seokjin:
i hope he doesn't act like a good big brother there and actually fights with me over food or video games

kim.seokjin:
I've always wanted those but he was just too nice. he was too good for me

eunsuen:
you must miss him a lot

kim.seokjin:
i do but more than that I'm guilty over myself

kim.seokjin:
because i feel like maybe

kim.seokjin:
just maybe he died because of me. because i was always so jealous of him. he was good at everything i wasn't. everyone loved him more even i loved him more than myself

kim.seokjin:
maybe I've actually wanted him gone maybe i really did that

eunsuen:
it's not your fault

kim.seokjin:
i know that but

kim.seokjin:
if i was only a better brother

kim.seokjin:
if i spent more time at home with him listened to his lame advises or be good to him

kim.seokjin:
realize how much i loved him before he was gone

kim.seokjin:
you know i never would've thought that, he would be just gone like that

kim.seokjin:
how could he vanish all of a sudden

kim.seokjin:
it still feels like he's there when he isn't

eunsuen:
i can understand

eunsuen:
though i know losing a brother is a lot still when i came to know the seokjin, a person i used to know died all of a sudden like that

eunsuen:
it really hurt and i couldn't believe it

eunsuen:
so i can't even measure how sad you feel at times and I'm truly sorry i wish i could help somehow

kim.seokjin:
it's okay

kim.seokjin:
talking to you idk why my heart feels less heavier now

kim.seokjin:
so thank you for listening to me

kim.seokjin:
I've never told this to anyone before

eunsuen:
I'll be always here if you need anyone to talk to

kim.seokjin:
you promise?

eunsuen:
i promise

---
a/n: at least one of them could make the promise.