Namjoon never expected me to ask such a question.

I held up his chin, forcing him to look through my eyes as they were filling with water. "Doesn't my question have an answer?"

I've never seen him like this. He seems broken. Where is that unbreakable, Namjoon?

"I've done something even worse," He replied with a low voice. "March 19th, the worst day of my life—"

Something blocked his throat as if he was about to cry. I held his hands tightly.

"Byun Haneul was my best friend; Byun Minjun's older son," He continued, letting a breath out. "Haneul had a girl friend. He loved her to death. He would do anything for her in order to see her happy. She was the same. She had the same feelings for Haneul, but Hojin was jealous for two reasons. The first was that Byun Minjun loved his older son the most and the second, well Haneul was running his father's company and he was living a better life than his brother. Haneul's success caused his brother's jealousy. Hojin's jealousy of his older brother was intense.
I hated Hojin from the very begining, because I could see how he was treating his brother, but Haneul believed that he was not treating him like shit on purpose."

"What happened next?" I asked, nervously.

"The next thing that I can remember is his girl friend's death," He replied as his eyes were filling with water. "Hojin told me that Haneul was betraying his girl friend. It was unblievable! I don't know why I believed that shit, but I somehow did.
I called his girl friend, telling her all I've heared from Hojin. She was on her way to his company, but her car swerved to the left and fell into the river. She couldn't survive that accident."

Poor Namjoon! He must've blamed himself because of her death.

"Haneul abandoned his father's company so that Hojin could take his place, but Hojin was young, so Byun Minjun still didn't believe in him.
Hojin never stopped encouraging his brother to commit a suicide. I always talked to Haneul, telling him that Hojin isn't a real brother to him. He just wanted everything for himself. He believed that the world is his kingdom, but Haneul believed that it's all because of the excitement of youth." He said, rubbing his eyes.

"Excitement of youth? Pathetic!"

"Maybe, you're right. Maybe, it was pathetic, but Haneul never stopped caring for his brother," He said, taking a deep breath. "One day, as I was reading a book at the library, Hojin called me. You know what he said? He said that Haneul has commited a suicide! Hojin was laughing. He was fucking laughing! I mean, what kind of brother laughs at his sibling's death?"

It's strange, I know. But, Hojin never seemed like a normal person to me.

Never.

Tears were running down Namjoon's cheeks. I reached out my hand to wipe them, but he pushed my hand away.

"After Haneul's death, Byun Minjun started taking control of my life. He said that he will never leave me alone and he will hurt the person whom I love the most," He continued, wiping his tears with his hands. "That's why I want you to stay out of my life. My world is a dark and dirty place."

Wait, does he mean that I'm the one whom he loves the most?

He stood up, looking down at me.

"I know you loved them, but you can't blame yourself forever," I shouted, gripping his wrist. "Listen, it was an accident, okay? You had nothing to do with it."

"Maybe, but I can't fool myself," He said, punching on the wall. "It hurts, Y/N! It fucking hurts badly!"

I wanted to help him, but I wasn't capable of anything.

What if Byun Minjun never leaves him alone? I can talk to him, right? I know that he may never care, but at least, I know that I've tried my best.

Suddenly, somebody knocked on the door. "Honey?"

Namjoon ran towards the window. "I know that you want to help me, but please, stay out of this mess." He whispered, then he left my bedroom, jumping out of the window.

I switched my glance at the door that was opening slowly.

"You were shouting. Is everything alright?" Mom asked as she was coming closer.

"I had a nightmare," I replied, going under my blanket as a tear was running down my cheek. "I'm fine."

"Alright, Sleep well." She said, closing the door, leaving my bedroom.

Now that I know Namjoon's secret, I feel like I have to do something about his freedom.

•••

I was walking in the hallway, hoping to see Hojin. It seemed like he was nowhere to be found.

"Looking for me?" He said, encircling his arm around my shoulder.

This animal knows everything!

"I want to talk to your father."

He started laughing. "What makes you think that he will accept to see you?"

"It's urgant." I replied as I started walking, forcing him to walk with me as well.

The students were watching us. Maybe, they were thinking that Hojin and I are together, but no! I will never ever be with this beast, again.

"If you're doing this because of Namjoon, I gotta say that my father wants to get rid of him."

I stopped walking, again, turning my face at him. "You're—"

"Y/N!" Yoongi shouted, cutting me off as he was running towards us.

"I'm sure that you don't want to be seen with me around your friends," Hojin whispered in my ear. "Neither do I."

He walked away as Yoongi was still running towards me.

"Seeing you having a chat with that asshole is kind of strange." Yoongi said.

"Don't tell the boys that you've seen me with him." I said, begging Yoongi with my eyes.

"Why? Are you scared of them?" He asked, enlarging his eyes.

I let a breath out. "I'm not scared of them. I'm just—"

"You just what?" Seokjin asked as he was standing behind us with his arms crossed.

Yoongi and I turned at him.

I gulped.

"She's just nervous about her exam." Yoongi replied in behalf of me, trying to save my ass.

Seokjin narrowed his eyes. "Okay?"

Jimin walked towards us, tapping Seokjin on the shoulder. "Hey! I've been looking everywhere for you."

Seokjin turned his face at Jimin. "And I was looking for Yoongi." Seokjin said, switching his glance at Yoongi.

"Why?" Yoongi asked.

"Because we're gonna be late for our class, genius." Seokjin replied, gripping Yoongi's wrist, forcing him to walk with him.

Jimin and I stayed together.

"Haven't you heard anything about Namjoon?" Jimin asked, putting his hands in his pocket.

Well, of course. He was in my bedroom, last night.

"No," I lied. "Has something happened?"

"I don't know," He replied, letting a breath out. "I thought that maybe you'd heard of him. I'm worried, y'know?"

I started walking towards my classroom as Jimin was walking beside me. "Namjoon's fine, Jimin. Don't worry."

"I hope so," He said, taking a deep breath. "Can I ask you a question?"

I nodded.

"You know where he is, don't you?" He asked, gripping my wrists, forcing me to stop, and look straight through his eyes.

"Why are you asking me such a question?"

"Because you're behaving like you know everything. Seokjin believes the same thing. So does Taehyung." He replied, letting go of my hand.

"I'm gonna be late for my class." I said, trying to ditch him.

"Yes or no?" He asked seriously.

I remained quiet.

"I'll take that as a yes, then." He continued, turning his back at me.

I placed my hand on his shoulder. "Please, Jimin. Understand me."

"Understanding you is a hard thing to do." He said, heading towards his classroom.

This conversation seemed familiar. Something flashed back in my mind.

"I know that you hate me." I said, changing the conversation.

"I don't hate you. I just don't get you. Understanding your feelings is a hard thing to do." He said, chuckling.

Suddenly, I returned to the reality. "What the hell am I going to do?"