(056 - The Awakening)

Song of the chapter: Devil Doesn't Bargain by Alec Benjamin.

I don't know why this song came to my mind when I titled the chapter. Then as I was writing, I realized that the song really embodies the first part of this chapter, majorly Jidenna's POV. I'm sure you'll understand what I mean when you read.

Plus, I love Alec Benjamin 😌✨.

Oh! And we are at 90k Views and 25k Votes😩🔥! Okruu! Thank you guys so much for being here from the beginning to now. I love y'all (except Haliyah 😑) Demmers for life🔥🔥 (if you know, you know🌚)

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𝐉𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐍𝐀
(Jidenna Leo Okojie)

TK's eyes were blazing red as he stared between Adela and me with utmost disdain. So red that I wasn't sure if it was because he was angry, or because he was possibly high. And the probability of him being high on school grounds was seventy-five percent so I won't put that past him at all.

Either way, it wasn't looking good.

Adela pulled away slightly, stepping away from me a little bit to create ample space between us, and I was grateful that she could feel the rising tension in the room. Somehow, I felt that she wasn't doing it because she wanted to. She was doing it because she didn't want to put me in an awkward position with TK.

But personally, I wasn't exactly thrilled that TK had interrupted. Especially since he was glaring hard at Adela like she brutally murdered his cat or destroyed his most expensive Nikes. He was looking at her as if he wanted to bury her six feet under with just his eyes.

I didn't like it. At All.

"TK," I called his name, trying to make him tear his gaze away from Adela and look at me. It worked, because he looked right at me, eyebrows tugged up.

"Care to explain what's going on here?" His eyes darted between the dark-skinned girl and me as he asked - no, demanded from me.

Before I could respond, Adela scoffed out a humorless laugh, shaking her head.

"I can't be here for this," She muttered, more to herself than to us but due to the quietness of the room, we could hear.

Before I could think deeply about what her statement must have meant, she looked up at me, and with a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips, she said, "I have to go. I'll call you,"

"Yes, GET OUT!"

My eyes widened automatically at that sudden snap from TK.

"Tekena!–"

"–Don't yell at me."

Adela and I spoke together, but her statement made all the words at the tip of my tongue die.

I turned to look at her and found her already looking at TK. Her gaze on him was neutral and her voice had been calm but the warning undertone was as clear as day. If TK was baffled that she was talking back at him, he sure didn't show it. But Adela wasn't even done with him.

With her gaze still trained squarely on him, she spoke again.

"Don't EVER raise your voice at me, Tekena Tamuno," She spelled out without batting an eyelid, his full name rolling off her tongue like sweet poison, luscious yet venomous. I had to stop myself from gapping, staring at Adela in awe.

"And just in case you are not hearing clearly, Yes, that's a warning." Came her point-blank conclusion.

Damn! My eyes widened even more.

Now that sure earned a reaction from TK. He veered back a bit, his brows quirked up in something that looked between astonishment and disbelief. He kind of also looked amused, looking at her like he was just seeing her for the first time. It was so obvious he hadn't been expecting that sort of comeback from her at all.

But then, it would be ludicrous to underestimate the power of Adela's words. Talking from experience, I knew firsthand how they could destabilize a person. I mean, TK was more thick-skinned than I was and this was absolutely nothing compared to the things she has said to me, but Adela's words held serious weight.

And with TK's reaction, this was certainly no exception.

I couldn't help the stubborn smile that kept tugging at my lips, even when I kept biting the insides of my mouth to stop it.

"I'll see you later," She didn't wait for TK to think of a response back before she spoke to me again, her lips mimicking my smile.

"I'll call you," It sounded like I was making a promise to her... and honestly, it was a promise. She nodded, stretching out to give my hand a small, reassuring squeeze before she walked out of the room, not sparing TK another glance.

When she was out and I turned to TK, he was already looking at me, giving me the same hard stare that he was giving Adela a minute ago.

Here we go. I exhaled.

"So, you guys are on I'll call you basis now, uhn?" His tone was both mocking and incredulous like he couldn't believe Adela and I had gotten so close. I forced myself not to roll my eyes at TK.

As if I knew he'd make such a big deal about this. And we haven't even started talking about the real reason he was here.

"You are making such a big deal out of something that is not that deep," I stated matter-of-factly, shaking my head as if it would dissuade whatever thought he had cooked up in his head.

It did not.

"Am I really?" He asked, folding his hands around his chest with a frown marred across his face. "Because I legit just walked in on the both of you hugging, and you also stood there and said nothing while she insulted me!"

"She didn't insult you," I quickly negated, and his frown deepened. "You yelled at her unprovoked, TK. What were you expecting? For her to stand still and allow you to walk over her? Adela is not easily intimated by anyone, not even me–"

"–Or you haven't had the balls to put her in her place." He interjected harshly, his words pricking me and hurting more than they were probably intended to.

Ouch.

I ignored that statement.

"Adela is not your problem, TK. I am," I said to him, knowing exactly why he was here in the first place. "Attack me and not her," I told him.

"Oh, I'll attack her with all I've got!" He spat out, not listening to me. "Because now I know the real reason you pulled that crazy and stupid stunt in the hallway!" He furious jabbed his index finger towards the senior block.

There it is. The real reason why he's here.

"Tekena–" I started, but he didn't let me continue.

"She put you up to it, didn't she?" He asked incredulously, almost rhetorically because he seemed to have conjured the answer to that question in his mind already.

"She was the one that asked you to put everything on the line!" He yelled, anger sipping through his voice in waves that baffled me. "Your reputation, your prestige, Every Single thing you have ever worked for now down the drain because of her!" He thundered, sounding and looking more furious than he should.

What is this?

"Adela had nothing to do with what happened in the hallway," I debunked immediately. "Yes, she made me understand why I needed to do what I did, but I made that decision Myself. Not because of Adela but because I owe it to Hilary and the guys! Because I owe it to Myself, TK."

He scoffed.

"At what cost, Jidenna? Social Suicide? You put everything on the line!" He snapped.

"And I'm willing to put more on the line if that will get Hilary to see how sorry I am!" I retorted, my voice coming out harsher than intended, echoing through quiet walls.

TK stared back at me, his expression suddenly blank, and immediately, I knew he didn't understand what it felt like to live the way I'd been living for the last three months. Detached, Alone, and filled with so much guilt, I feared it would consume me whole. And it almost did consume me.

Until she came.

"You don't understand what it felt like," I pointed out, making my voice as calm as possible. "This past few months have been nothing but torture for me and as my best friend, you didn't even notice that I wasn't myself –"

"–That's unfair," His voice came out in an unpleasant growl, cutting my words off. "If there was anyone that noticed, Jidenna, It was me. I noticed how much what happened affected you and I tried to help you through it–"

"No, you didn't help me through it," It was my turn to cut him off, and he quirked his brow in question as if he didn't expect me to say that. "If there was anything you did, it was that you downplayed my feelings and kept asking me to move on when I was being eaten up by guilt. That wasn't helping." I told him point-blank.

He didn't say anything after that. He just stared at me like he was newly seeing me, having the same look of astonishment and disbelief he had when Adela clapped back at him. I wasn't sure what exactly was unbelievable about any of this. The fact that I was saying the truth, or the fact that I was countering him.

It was unusual. Even for me.

After all, TK is always right.

Not today, apparently. A small voice at the back of my head chimed.

"I was just trying to help the only way I thought was best," He said in a whisper when he finally found his voice. Somehow, I understood what he meant. Telling me to fashi and move on was the way he knew how to do his thing, was the way that worked for him.

Not me. I can't live like that.

I exhaled.

"I'm not like you, Tekena," I stated, my voice still in a whisper. "I get how you do your things but I can't live like that," I was trying to pick my words carefully so that I won't end up saying something hurtful. "I can't live, knowing that I hurt someone I really care about - people I really care about. You can, but I can't,"

There was no other way to say it. That was the only way it could come out without having to spell out exactly what I meant. And I didn't have to because TK was smart enough to pick up what I meant because his face hardened as soon as I was done.

He knew I was talking about what happened with Dawn.

Till tomorrow, I don't know exactly what happened that day. I wasn't in school for the entire, courtesy of my Father, and before I could watch any of the videos that were posted on the group chat, they were all taken down. It was Hilary and Kizito that had given me a detailed explanation of what had happened. When I confronted TK, he debunked it.

"...It's an exaggeration," He had said, brushing my confrontation aside with a wave. "I broke with Dawn in public, big deal. She won't be the first and neither will she be the last."

"You didn't have to break things off with her in public, TK!" I had snapped at him, obviously not buying into the excuse. "You weren't interested in the relationship again, fine. But, you could have just let her down gently... and in private."

He had laughed like I cracked the funniest joke.

"And have her following me around like a lap dog?" He had asked, the question both incredulous and rhetorical. "No, thank you. Dawn is flipping obsessed with me and letting her down like that was the only way I could get her off my back for good. She'll be fine. She'll get over it soon enough,"

Dawn didn't get over it as fast as TK had said she would, but he didn't seem to care about that at all. It made me wonder if Hilary and Kizito had really exaggerated it, or if TK had just downplayed the truth. Either way, back then, I didn't want to have to be caught in the middle of having to choose between my best friend and my very first friends so I maintained a neutral ground.

That was when things between Kizito and I began to strain. Dawn didn't put me in that position to make a decision and Hilary was my girlfriend. Semeeha, well, was Semeeha.

Thinking back now, there's something awfully messed up about everything that happened and the way I handled things. And honestly, deep down I think I've always known something was messed up about it but never acknowledged it.

Because you keep running away from responsibilities. That still small voice was back, and it wasn't taunting like the dark voice from earlier.

Well, not anymore. I'm done running away from my responsibilities.

"I had to do what I did today," I spoke up after what seemed like hours of silence stretching between TK and me. "Hilary deserved a lot better than what I did to her. She deserved a lot more than the apology I gave today. I owed it to her to clear her name in front of the entire class, TK, and that's what I did. I don't regret it for one second."

TK scoffed out a humorless laugh, shaking her head slowly.

"Do you honestly think it's going to make her feel any different about you?" He asked me, his voice having a teensy bit mocking undertone to it... or I might just have been imagining it.

"What?" His question confused me.

"Jidenna, Hilary is only going to hate you more after the stunt you pulled today." He deadpanned, not mincing his words even a bit.

It rendered me speechless, making me frown. And somehow, that seemed to edge him on because he just continued like he never stopped talking.

"You think clearing her name in front of the entire class will automatically put you in her good books?" He chuckled humorlessly again. "That's fücking bull shit and deep down, you know it too.–

She's going to hate you even more for putting her on the spot and embarrassing her publicly, for the second time," He held up his index and middle finger to indicate second. "Maybe that's not how you meant it to be but that's definitely how she'll see it at the end of the day,"

I felt attacked.

"You broke her heart, Jidenna, and her trust. One stupid grand gesture won't fix how much you shattered her," I tried not to wince as his use of words cut deep. "She's going remember it for life and she's going to keep hating you for everything you did, especially with what happened to her brother,–"

That one went straight into my guts and almost knocked me out.

"So, if you are think for one second that you guys will come back to being all buddy-buddy and lovey-dovey after what happened today," He jabbed his thumb towards our block. "You had better dead that mindset now-now because you cannot easily buy her forgiveness. You cannot buy all of their forgiveness. Kill that thought right now!"

His words knocked the breath right out of me and rendered me speechless. An agonizing silence filled the room as soon as he was done talking. We stared at each other for what felt like the longest two minutes of my life, TK looking at me like he had just dropped the biggest banger of the century.

And somehow, he had.

TK just laid all my fears out unapologetically, his words hitting me left and right with premium discouragement. With everything he just said, It was almost as if I had wasted all my time and energy trying to prove to everyone and myself that I am not a bad person because, at the end of the day, Hilary and the others won't buy it. No one will.

At the end of the day, I'm not going to be forgiven. At the end of the day, I'm still the Bad Guy, the Demon that ruined everything.

His words almost destabilized me. Almost.

Because forgiveness was never the purpose of my apology in the first place.

"There is nothing to kill because that thought was never there in the first place," I spoke up after what felt like hours, my voice calm but my words countering every single thing TK said.

He was shocked, staring back at me with his brows furrowed and forehead creased in a slight frown, eyes squinted like he wanted to see me clearly.

I exhaled.

"TK, I did not apologize to Hilary because I wanted her forgiveness. I need the forgiveness, yes, but that was not the reason I went the extra mile today. I went the extra mile because I needed her to see that I am sorry for everything I did and I regret them. That's all," I said to him.

"And you think she'd believe you," There was that mocking undertone again. I chose to ignore it, shrugging in response.

"She has every reason not to believe me, so if she doesn't, it's completely fine by me," TK quirked his eyes brows in mild bewilderment. "All I know is that I've done my own part in giving her the closure she needs. Let the entire school hate me. At least they don't hate her anymore and I'm good with that," I concluded with another shrug.

"You can't handle the hate from our classmates, Jidenna," TK said, his words precise and deadpan, almost attacking and aggressive. "You and I know you don't have the skin to take it."

Because of the neutrality of his tone, I couldn't tell if he was mocking/insulting me, or he was just being plain honest. Either way, my lips tugged in a small sad smile at the reminder that my classmates won't let me off the hook easily. And in all honesty, just like TK had said I wasn't even sure I had the skin to take or stomach anything they dish out.

But this was my cross to bear for being a certified ass hat.

Besides, I have Adela.

But with TK, I wasn't sure, especially with the way he was acting about the whole thing right now.

So, I had to verify.

"But at least I have you right?" I asked, and he stayed silent, only staring back at me. "Whatever happens, you'll have my back, right?" I asked as I stared back at him expectantly, waiting for his response.

Tekena stared back at me for a moment before his lips broke into a small smile. The first genuine smile on his face since he came in here.

"Silly of you to ask that," He teased as he tried to put my mind at ease and I chuckled back lightly.

"It's you and me, Jidenna. It's always going to be you and me," He brought his hands up for a bro-handshake and I met him mid-way. "You are my best friend. Of course, I've got your back. Always. Till the end."

Tekena promised me, and I nodded slowly, trying to ease myself with his words of confirmation like I have always done in the past, repeating them in my head like a mantra of assurance.

...You are my best friend. Of course, I've got your back...

... Always...

...Till the end.

Only that this time unlike other times, I didn't feel at ease.

It felt strange. Really strange.

Like a light switch, memories of everything that has been going on for the past few months came flooding right back into my mind as if those words unlocked the door that had been keeping them at bay. Memories of how TK has not been having my back as much as I thought.

And suddenly, that statement of him having my back always and till the end didn't hold as much weight as it used to.

I mean, he hasn't been speaking to me for weeks, but then he has an opinion about a decision I made for myself, by myself. He was in school all through what happened today, probably even watched it live and direct, but still waited till this moment to come and meet me.

Today, TK left me high and dry, all on my own. And come to think of it, this wasn't the first time he'd be leaving me to bare the consequences of an action I make about something he instigated.

I didn't want to think too much about it, wanted to dead the thought totally. But TK telling me he had my back suddenly didn't sound about right. It sounded almost far-fetched, almost Unbelievable.

And out of nowhere, I started having doubts.

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𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐇𝐀
(Semeeha Iris Malik)

"I'll go get my things. Get Hilary's when you get yours," Dawn said to me as we walked into our block together.

I ignored the way her tone sounded like she was ordering me, knowing that things were still strained between us and she was still very much wary about me. I didn't want to give her more reasons to believe that my apology last week had been exactly what she said it was.

Fake.

"Alright," I answered instead, nodding. "We'll meet back here when we are done, yeah?" I asked, and all she did was shrug in response before walking off in the opposite direction of the block, where her class was located, without saying anything. I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

Good Riddance. I scoffed to myself before I resumed walking towards my class.

At least, now she cannot avoid me, stay away from me, or not talk to me. Whether Dawn likes it or not, she has to be around me now more than ever. She'll eventually have to come to terms with the fact that I'm not going anywhere and I'm here to stay. She'll eventually have to forget everything that happened and be my friend again. For Hilary's sake.

I smiled to myself as I continued walking down the hallway.

In all honesty, what happened today was a blessing in disguise for me. Not like I enjoyed the fact that Hilary had a meltdown in front of the entire class – that was awful and no one should have to go through something so embarrassing – but that disaster sort of worked in my favor because now, the gang and I would have no choice but to spend time together because of Hilary.

Selfish Much. That annoying small voice cooed in my head and I rolled my eyes.

Call it whatever you like. Every human being is selfish in their own little way and I don't think I should be an exception. Besides, I only think about number one. I come first no matter what.

With that thought, my smile widened to a grin as I skipped down the hallway, feeling a lot better about myself.

But that grin wiped off my face as soon as I got to my class, and every single feeling of pride I had for myself evaporated into thin air and was replaced with a heap of self-consciousness, garnished with a tiny feeling of dread and fear.

School ended about an hour ago but Dawn, Kizito, me, and Simisola Jordan still stayed back because we were waiting for Hilary's parents to come and pick her up. And given that the block was a literal ghost town when Dawn and I came in, I thought we were the only ones left in school.

I was wrong.

He was there.

The one person I have been avoiding since last week was inside the class, standing by his seat, picking up some books from inside his locker and stuffing them into his black backpack. He didn't look like he was in haste, picking up those books and putting them in his bag like he had all the time in the world.

The one person I have so religiously tried not to run into.

It didn't look like he knew I was inside the class as well, and at that moment, I should have turned around and bolted out of the class, hidden in the corner, and wait for him to leave before I go in to pick my things. But for some reason, I couldn't for the life of me move my feet from the spot where I stood.

I just kept staring at him.

And he noticed.

Collins noticed the extra presence in the room because his hands stopped what they were doing in an instant...

And slowly, his head lifted till he was facing me... till he was looking directly at me.

I gulped. Audibly.

Because for the first time, Collins wasn't smiling at me like he used to.

His gaze on me was just neutral, his eyes almost emotionless, it looked so unnatural for someone like him. Someone that was always cheerful. Someone whose eyes always sparkled with unrivaled glee.

And suddenly, I couldn't find my tongue.

I decided to give him like two seconds, telling myself he won't keep up the strong face for long and will soon break into that famous smile of his.

But minutes like years passed and still nothing from him. He just kept staring at me, his gaze shockingly opaque that I couldn't read them.

Collins has never been like this. This was a first, and deep down, I knew why.

"Is Hilary okay?" Was the first thing he said after what felt like an eternity of silence.

I blinked, the question catching me off guard. I wasn't sure if it was the suddenness of his voice that startled me or the fact that Hilary was the first person he was asking about.

What? Were you expecting him to ask about you? The tiny, annoying voice mocked.

I shook the voice, and any form of haziness off, replacing my embarrassingly moronic expression with a faux nonchalant look, shrugging as I walked further into the classroom, moving to my and Hilary's seat.

"She's fine,"

Came my monotonous response while I tried busying myself with unloading Hilary's things into her bag. But I couldn't do that without being very conscious of the fact that Collins was staring at me. All the hairs at the back of my neck were standing at attention, not because I was creeped out by the stare but because I was nervous.

It literally felt like his eyes were digging into my skin and staring deep into my soul, trying to figure me out as he has always done.

Just like he did last week. Just like he'll do right now.

In Three...

Two...

One...

"Okay."

What?

My eyes widened in shock and my head spun around sharply to look at him that I thought my head will fall off my neck.

The dark-skinned boy didn't even act like he had said anything, and honestly, compared to how talkative he usually was, especially to me, he really hasn't said anything. All he did was close his locker, zip up his bag before swinging it over his shoulder, pick up his helmet from under his seat, and started walking, making his way out of the class.

Just like that.

"Is that all you are going to say to me?" I blurted out before I could stop myself.

But it seemed to do the work because Collins stopped short on his steps and turned around to look at me, neatly carved brows quirked in inquisition.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his voice laced with confusion, I almost believed he was clueless. Almost, because I knew he knew exactly what I was talking about.

I scoffed, but chose to indulge him.

"You just asked about Hilary and that was it," I stated, folding my hands across my chest with a deep frown creasing over his forehead. "You are really just going to walk away like that?" I asked incredulously.

And you think you are making sense like this. That voice snickered in mockery.

Collins stared back at me, his eyebrows still tugged up, but this time not in confusion or question, but in what looked like awe. And his lips, for the first time since we started talking, since last week even, his lips quirked up slightly in a small smirk.

It almost looked like he was mocking me.

No, it didn't look like he was mocking me. He was mocking me.

"I thought this what you wanted," He answered me, his voice laced with recall. "For me to stay away from you. You made that very crystal last week, Semeeha," He reminded me, shutting me right up.

He wasn't wrong. He wasn't wrong at all.

I did spell out to him to stay away from me. And no, certainly not in the nicest way.

"Here," Collins stretched out a slushy cup to me.

I looked at him, my eyes scanning his frame briefly. He wasn't wearing his school uniform shirt because... I threw up on it. All he had on was a white vest that clung to his body like a second skin, highlighting the muscles of his chest, and armhole straining against his bulging biceps.

He was still wearing his school trouser but not his shoes. Those were ruined too. The only footwear he had on was a pair of black scrubs the nurse had lent to him.

"It will make you feel a lot better," He said again, alerting my mind back to his previous statement. Meeting his eyes again, my forehead creased in a slight frown as I wondered my he was giving me that sugar-infused death trap.

"The nurse said you need more fluids in your body to feel better," He answered my unasked question, his hand still holding the cup out to me, I began to wonder if his hands were not hurting.

"Then you should have gotten me water instead of that," I made to snap at him but my voice came out hoarse instead, courtesy of my dry and painfully sore throat. I coughed, and it was even more painful.

I winced, massaging my neck.

"Your blood sugar is also dangerously low," Collins spoke, causing me to look up at him. "You have to take this or you might not be able to walk out of here on your feet," He told me.

I rolled my eyes, wondering what the theatrics was for. I fainted, big deal. Everyone gets low blood sugar sometimes, don't they?

"Well, I don't need your sympathy or your care," I yanked out the drip that was injected into the back of my palm.

"Semeeha–"

"And I certainly don't need you to tell me if I'm strong enough to walk out of here or not–"

"Semeeha, don't –"

"Because I'm going to walk out of here, right now and you won't stop me," I flipped the blanket that was covering the lower half of my body and swung my leg down to the grounds.

As soon as my feet touched the cold tiled floor of the female ward, it felt like I was stepping on thousands of pins and needles. It felt like they were piercing the sole of my feet, penetrating my skin to enter my bloodstream because my legs began to hurt so bad. My bones were on fire.

I tried not to wince or groan, not wanting to give away the pain I was feeling in my legs, not wanting Collins to see that I was in any form of agony. So I summoned up courage and hoisted myself up to my feet.

But immediately after I did that, the raging flame of pain in the bones of my legs graduated up to my entire body and consumed every single bone in my body, melting me into a puddle of excruciating pain. I yelped, slumping down to meet the hard floor.

But he caught me.

Collins had his hands wrapped around me in a matter of seconds, holding me up against his body in a way that I wouldn't fall to the ground... and also in a way that I could feel every single taut muscle of his chest pressed beneath my palm. It was then it occurred to me that asides from Kizito, I actually haven't been this close in body contact with any other guy.

Collins was second. And he was so close, that I could bath in his cologne. Faint, yet intoxicating enough for me to catch a whiff.

He was too close.

It made me feel... weird.

"Well, I think I'm stopping your right now," His voice dropped an octave lower– deeper, his lips turned in a teasing smirk. And because of our proximity, I could feel his breath fanning the skin of my face, leaving tingles all over.

What the fück?!

"Get your hands off me!" I snapped, ignoring the roughness of my throat as I pushed him away from me aggressively. Collins unhanded me as he veered back, causing me to plop back down on the bed like a rag doll, boneless and weak.

"You don't have to be so aggressive," He spoke, his voice calm and I knew he didn't take any offense to what I did. I glared at him but said nothing. I had nothing to say to him at this point when all I'd done from the beginning of the day is embarrass myself in front of him.

"You are weak, Semeeha," He continued despite my silence. "You really should take this," He was stretching out the slushy cup to me again.

"And I said I don't want it," I stubbornly refused to take it.

Not because I didn't want to drink the slushy but because for one, I didn't want to be more indebted to Collins than I already was. Two, because mother might notice the soda just by looking at me. Three, if I start with a slushy, I might be tempted to continue with other junkies, leading to another bloated belly.

Tomorrow was the photo shoot with Amy's Corsetry and my tummy was completely flat now. I intend to keep it that way to make Mother proud.

"Okay," I heard Collins sigh, before he took his seat on the bed beside mine, facing me. Intentionally, I avoided meeting his gaze but was very conscious of the fact that he was staring right at me, studying me.

"Though I have to ask because I am very curious and I can't stop thinking about it–"

"I'm not interested in whatever you have to say." I cut him off. But knowing Collins, that didn't stop him from saying what he wanted to say.

And for sure, his next question knocked the breath right out of me.

"Why is your blood sugar that low after you ate an entire box of sugar-filled treats?"

My head shot up in a start, my eyes widened in shock as I looked back at an unbothered Collins.

How the fück did he–?

"What?" That was all I could mutter.

The dark-skinned boy shrugged back, that unbothered expression still marred across his face like he had not just nabbed me for stealing his box of donuts and cupcakes. The same box of donuts and cupcakes I had rejected from him that same morning. The same box of donuts and cupcakes I had snapped at him for.

"I knew when you took it," He answered, and by God, he sounded so far from offended. "I allowed you to because I had an inclining that you have wanted it since I asked you in the morning.–"

What the... I gapped at him.

"But that's not even important because I'm not concerned about that," He brushed it off with a wave of his hand. "What I'm more concerned about is why your blood sugar is that low. Dangerously low."

"I threw up, Collins,"

I wasn't sure why I was indulging him instead of shutting him down. But I had this overwhelming urge to dissuade him from whatever thought he had in his head. Thoughts that might probably lead to him figuring out some things that were better left in the dark.

"I threw up," I repeated. "So, it makes sense that my blood sugar isn't high. Stop making something so small such a big deal and stop talking to me, please. I'm having a headache just by listening to you."

He didn't stop.

"It's actually a big deal because your blood sugar being that low doesn't actually make sense," He countered me calmly.

"What?" I blinked, confused as to what he was going on about. Collins exhaled, shifting to the edge of the bed and leaning forward as if to have a proper look at me.

"The level of blood sugar depends on your diet and nutrition," He began to explain, and as soon as he said the word diet, I started feeling uneasy. But I don't know why I didn't stop him from talking then. I just looked on and listened to him speak.

"The rise and fall of your blood sugar depend on what you take into your system, or what you don't take." He said to me. A deeper frown creased over my forehead as I peered back at him.

"So? What has that got to do with me?" I fired at him.

"The lowness of your blood sugar has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you threw up those carbs because your blood sugar is as low as that of someone that has not eaten in weeks, Semeeha." He deadpan.

An alarm went off in my head and goosebumps sprouted on my skin.

He figured it out.

How the fück did he figure it out?

"Excuse me?" My voice came out harsher than I intended.

"I mean, it's just a theory," He shrugged, and for some reason, that vexed me. "Because your blood sugar is lower than anything I have ever seen–"

"Well, it's a wrong and stupid theory!" I snapped at him, my sudden outburst cutting him off and shocking him a bit, but that didn't deter me.

"And the fact that you are insinuating something so absurd is very insulting and downright offensive, Collins!"

Now you are just being defensive. That annoying voice sang.

"Insulting? Offensive?" He frowned back in confusion. "Of course not. I wasn't trying to insult you, Semeeha. That's honestly the last thing I'll do. I'm only trying to look out for you because if you are really not eating well, it can be very dangerous to your health and–"

"Well, you are wrong! I am eating, and I'm eating well!" I cut him off again, the height of my voice causing my sore throat to hurt a bit but I ignored the pain.

"And what did I tell you about being all up in my business? Who the fück do you think you are to lecture me and talk down on me like I am a stupid, ignorant child that knows nothing about health? Who the hell do you think you are to lecture me about how to take care of myself? Who the fück are you!"

I yelled, standing up to my feet so that I'd be looking down at him, ignoring the piercing pain in my legs.

Collins stared back at me incredulously, mouth a gap in shock, and an expression that mirrored confusion marred his face. In other words, he looked so lost and perplexed.

"Where the hell is all this coming from?"

The fact that he was feigning ignorance when he knew exactly what he was doing, making it so believably made me even angrier because I almost believed he was truly lost.

"Wait, do you think I owe you shit because I took your piece of junk? Or because I threw up all over you, you think I owe you?–"

"–That's not what I'm saying at all–"

"–If that's the case, I'm going to buy you fifteen boxes back. Even a hundred! And I'm going to get you a new pair of uniforms and better shoes since that's what you want!"

"Semeeha–"

"In fact," I paused, reaching for my bag and roughly yanked out my purse, causing some of my books to fall. But I paid no heed to that, fishing out some naira notes from the purse.

"Take!"

I slapped the notes against his chest, the money splattering and falling to the floor. Collins didn't flinch. He just stared at the money on the floor before meeting my eyes again.

"Shebi that's what you want na!" I yelled in his face. He still didn't flinch.

"Semeeha, I just need you to listen to me–"

"No, you listen to me!" I roared, pointing a warning finger at him. Collins exhaled as he stared back at me wordlessly, pausing his lips together.

"I'm warning you for the last time. Stay out of my business, Collins Odion," I warned him.

"I don't want you checking up on me. I don't want you looking out for me. I don't want you caring. You are not my friend and I am not yours. Stay the fück away from me, Collins. I don't need you! Do you hear me? I DON'T NEED YOU!"

Dawn and Hilary had walked in at that very moment, so Collins couldn't talk back. I don't even think he had anything to say back to me after everything I dumped on him.

But what I wasn't expecting was for him to keep up with that same energy till now. It was so unlike him, extremely weird and uncharacteristic. he has always been the one seeking my attention, not the other way around.

Just thinking about the fact that I called him back, literally groveling for his attention made me cringe.

You like the special attention he gives you, Semeeha. It's not a sin to admit.

Keep Quiet.

"You said you don't want me checking up on you, or looking out for you, or caring," He listed out everything I said that day, counting them on his fingers. "You said to my face that we are not friends, Semeeha. What do you want me to do? Keep following you around till you bite my head off?" His voice was awfully calm, it was aggravating.

But, I kept my cool.

"I didn't expect you to take me so seriously that you won't even look in my direction or talk to me," I responded, but when Collins quirked his brows at me, I knew I had said something extremely stupid.

I mean, every single time that he talks to me, I'm extremely mean to him. Why would he want to keep talking to me?

But then, every single time I've told him to stay away or to stop acting like he could figure me out, he never listens. Always smiled every time I insult him, always the first person to call my name and wave at me every time I enter the class. Always checking up on me despite my attitude towards him.

Collins was always present. Always.

But this one time, he's taking me seriously? No naw.

There is always a breaking point, Semeeha. Know this and know peace. That tiny voice in my head said again. I pushed the voice to the back of my mind for the nth time today.

"Besides," I went on. "I was pissed at you. We all say things we don't mean when we are angry,"

Collins scoffed.

"Pissed?" He asked incredulously. "Semeeha, if there is anyone that was meant to be pissed, it should have been me.–

–You finished my box of treats without asking for permission, not knowing if I was keeping it for something. I could have left you in the hallway after you threw up on me, but I didn't. I took you to the health center and waited until you woke up.–

–I took care of you, Semeeha, but all you could do in return was slap your cash in my face. Very insulting, by the way,"

He didn't sound the least bit offended or angry, and that was what made this a lot more excruciating to listen to.

"And the truth is that I'm not even pissed at you for any of that. But why are you pissed?" He threw the question at me. "Because I was concerned about you? Because I wanted to make sure you were okay?"

"Because you were all up in my business!" I snapped at him. He stared back at me incredulously.

"Being concerned about you means I'm all up in your business?" There was slight laughter in his voice that rubbed me off like he was mocking me. It made me angry.

It's all in your head.

Shut up.

"Yes!" I fired back at Collins.

This boy doesn't get it. He doesn't get that I HATE the fact that he can read me so easily and dissect me. He literally figured out that I haven't been eating well just by my blood sugar level. I mean, there could have been any other reason for the low blood sugar, but he just had to major in that.

How?!

"I didn't ask you to be concerned about me, Collins," I continued. "I didn't ask for you to look out for me, and like I said last week, I don't need you to. I can take care of myself, thank you very much, and I have friends that really care, so I don't need you." I spelled out to him and he looked back, expression normal.

"If you are desperate for my friendship–" His eyebrows tugged in amusement. "–and want us to get along fine, then stop being all up in my business or trying to figure me out every single time.–

It's sickening Collins, and it's giving mad obsession vibes. Stalkish tendencies. It going to make you look like a creep. I'm sure you wouldn't want that, so stop it!"

I made sure to use words that will scare him enough to stop, words that I'm sure guys don't like being called. Obsessed. Creep. Stalker.

He wasn't giving any of those vibes, but the way he was always so easily figuring me out was enough to scare me. I needed to get me off my back enough for him to mind his business.

But not enough to stop talking to you? Just admit you love the attention he gives you.

Fück off.

Collins stared at me for what must have been the longest minute. When he finally opened his mouth to speak, I was expecting his usual apology for overstepping, which he actually did by the way.

But I was so wrong.

"I'm sorry, but No." He shook his head, shocking me right out of my wits.

What!

"Excuse me?" I was stupefied.

Collins in response let out a soft chuckle that echoed through the class. Then slowly, he started making his way toward me.

"You have no idea how hard it was to keep stopping myself from checking up on you or talking to you this past week," He started to speak as he walked. "You have no idea how hard it was to act like I didn't want to know how you were doing after last week, how hard it was to act like I didn't care.–"

He stopped just a few steps away from me but still close enough to rend me immobile.

"–It was so excruciating to act like that because it's not me. It's not who I am, Semeeha. It's never going to be who I am. And in as much as I want to respect your request, I'm sorry, but not this one."

I was speechless.

"So, I'm not going to stop, Semeeha," He went on like he never stop. "I'm not going to stop checking up on you. I'm not going to stop looking out for you. I'm not going to stop getting concerned about you, because that's who I am, and because I care about you. Believe it or not, I really, really care about you,"

What... That last statement knocked the breath right out of me.

And it didn't seem like Collins was in any way done.

"And no, I'm not desperate to be friends with you," He shook his head. "I don't need to be friends with you to show that I care about you.–

Be mean to me all you want. Insult me all you want. Embarrass me in front of the entire class if that's what pleases you, I don't give a damn." He shrugged. "It won't stop me from caring about you, Semeeha."

What manner of stubbornness is this? Or is it stupidity?

I was flabbergasted.

"Sue me, but I'm not changing my mind," He shrugged again.

"When I have my mind set on something I care about, there is no changing it. Especially–"

He paused, taking one more step closer till he was standing just centimeters away from me, towering over me in all his brawny might in a way that caused my breath to catch in my throat. I swallowed involuntarily, staring back at him like a complete idiot that still couldn't find her voice.

"Especially," He repeated, his voice reduced to a husky whisper, breath tickling the skin of my face. "If it's something- someone–" He corrected himself and my heart picked up a best.

His eyes flickered down a bit before he looked back up to meet my eyes, dark brown orbs holding me spellbound against my better judgment as he finished his statement

"–I'm really passionate about."

Oh, God...

I was awestruck, blinking back at Collins. I couldn't move, and I couldn't look away even if I wanted to. I just stood there, barely ten centimeters away from Collins, and stared at him in an unconscious daze.

What the hell does he mean by someone he's really passionate about?

And why the hell can't I seem to move my limbs?

What is this for God's sake? Hypnosis? Mind control? Witch Craft?

Someone snap me out of this!

"Collins?"

A vaguely familiar voice filled the room, jerking me right out of my daze just as I needed.

Oh, thank God! I jumped away from Collins, putting as much space between us as possible.

Collins turned around to look at who called him, and I followed his gaze to see Lase, the timekeeper standing at the doorway, eyes flickering inquisitively between the both of us and her lips turned in a teasing smirk.

I can't begin to imagine what would be going on in her mind, seeing the both of us in such proximity that left nothing to the imagination.

Gosh, this is so embarrassing. I averted my gaze from the light-skinned girl.

"Are you ready to bounce?" She asked Collins, completely disregarding me. I ignored that because at least, she wasn't asking any embarrassing questions.

"Just a second," He answered her, before turning back to look at me, making me wonder what more he had to say.

I averted my gaze from his.

"I found this after you left the health center last week," He spoke. I looked at him in time to see him slip his bag off his shoulder and reach inside. Then, he brought out something I recognized immediately.

Jesus Christ!

I snatched the book from his hand, fingers quickly flipping and scheming through the pages to see if anything was missing. Thankfully, everything was intact. I hugged the book to my chest, not believing that it hasn't been with me for almost one week and I didn't notice.

This book was so precious to me. So precious that it was a secret. No one has ever seen between the pages before, not even my friends.

I looked back up and met Collins' eyes, still unable to find my voice. I watched him stare down at me with a look akin to adoration, and I knew immediately that he had opened the book.

"You opened the book," I voiced out my thoughts, my voice quivering for reasons I didn't even know of. He shrugged, his lips tugged in a small smile.

"I did. Couldn't help myself," He admitted.

At this moment, on a normal day, I'd have snapped at him for invading my privacy, just the same way I had snapped at Hilary when she tried to open it after we got back from TK's party months ago.

But suddenly, I couldn't bring myself to even yell at Collins. I couldn't even find my voice again. Right now, I must have been looking like a little kid that just got her favorite teddy bear back.

It was exactly how I felt.

"Really nice sketches you've got there, Semeeha," He sounded proud, and I couldn't help the feeling of delight that filled my chest.

"You are very Talented." He finished.

My heart skipped a thousand beats.

For the first time in the longest while, I felt a sudden wave of self-worth wash over me, a feeling of pride build up in my chest. Not the empty kind that came every time I did something Mother liked, but the kind that made my heart swell.

I couldn't help it, couldn't stop feeling that I was finally worth something, not for anyone, but for myself.

All because Collins called me talented.

It was maddening, and not in a bad way.

The dark-skinned boy didn't wait for me to talk back before he turned around and started walking to meet Lase at door, before the both of them continued out of the class,

Leaving me to my chaotic, yet peaceful thoughts.

𝐀/𝐍

If you don't know the sketches Collins is talking about, then you should probably go and look at Semeeha's aesthetics again and guess🌚. Its pretty clear sef.

I should have introduced this side of Semeeha since, but it never seemed to fit in any of her POVs except this one. This chapter seems perfect to introduce that side of Semeeha because it's one of the key factors that will lead to the change in #Semins abi is it #Sellins dynamic🌚.

Besides, it may seem as though Collins is catching on to Semeeha's eating disorder. Too soon? I don't think so. Trust me, I know what I'm doing 😌.

Jidenna is already opening his eyes small small o! Let somebody shout Hallelujah!😭🔥. And he didn't even need Adela or anyone to spell it out for him this time. He figured it out all on his own 🥺✨.

We are finally getting a character development on his part. A round of applause for our baby boy. He's growing up.

We'll get to see how Hilary is fairing in the next few chapters🤧. Let's pray for our baby girl.

Till then, you know the drill. Kisses 😘.