I was supposed to say no just to prevent myself from getting any closer to him, from feeling any other way about him.

We're just two adults trying to co-parent, nothing more and can't be anything less no matter how hard I try.

Anything more than that is foul and disrespectful to our spouses, even though they've disrespected us.

However, I took the bait; a fish falling for the bait of ecstasy.

I'm drowning in a sea of bliss as his hands wrap themselves around my hips, fitting themselves around me so perfectly. His soft touch, from my backside to my hips, makes my eyes roll to the back of my head.

I'm lost in his warm arms, resting heartbeat, and that scent...

His cologne sends me back to the very spot where we met, the first moment I knew that he'd be the one to change my life somehow. That one moment that made me never forget about him is what got us here now.

This is so wrong. I shouldn't be doing this.

Why am I not pushing this man off me? Why am I still resting my head on his muscular chest? Studying how fast his heart is beating? Wanting to know his breathing pattern and if the same love he used to have for me still lives within him?

If only we could find out with just one ear to someone's chest.

I wondered about all of this until everything consumed me and I never looked back. From the building's décor to the live jazz band to Tripp himself, I'm captured by it all.

My mind is in another world; a world where everything is flourishing and beautiful to the eye. Fresh flowers, clear waters, light blue skies with vibrant clouds painting it, and crisp leaves from healthy trees that sway in the cool breeze. The sun is picturesque as it makes everything come to life and reveals the lovely colors of the world.

This is all I've ever wanted. This is what I've been craving for the past several years.

This is what I fell in love with and it takes a special person to create this world in my mind. I can't make this up all alone. I've tried and all I've ended up with is gray skies with chopped down trees and pollution throughout the space.

My world was destroyed.

My eyes met his as we rock slowly to the smooth jazz piece that's slipping through our ears. His fingers seek to intertwine with mine and I, suddenly, allow access. He takes the lead in our slow dance and his head rests on top of mine delicately.

There's nothing to be spoken aloud because we're speaking telepathically. We may be hiding our true feelings for each other but we still communicate with each other in a way that makes us connect on a whole different level.

I don't want to stop looking at him or let him go. By the way he's holding me, it seems that he feels the same way. That warms my heart.

My palm rests on the back of his neck and I feel the goosebumps. The hairs respond to my touch and that excites me. The warmth of his body encompasses mine and I smile at the feeling.

What was once an ice box is slowly melting, ready to begin a new life.

Tripp must've caught me smiling because he reciprocates.

That's not supposed to happen.

Be still, my beating heart.

This may be wrong but it feels oh so right and I refuse to let this feeling go. If this is a dream, please let me continue sleeping. Don't wake me up.

Feeling a bit embarrassed and guilty, I press my face into his chest and giggle a bit, thinking about all of the shit we went through over the years just for us to end back here.

All this time, we could've been together and, possibly, married by now. This whole feud was so stupid and created over nothing. So why did we choose to go our separate ways if we still craved and needed each other?

Our relationship was unlike anyone else's. I know that every relationship is different but this was something special. What seems so corny and stupid to others was magical to us.

Damn it. Now, I'm feeling guilty and getting worked up over something that's happened in the past.

He lets go of my hand and presses his hands against my cheeks, lifting my eyes to his. I want to kiss him so bad.

"Relax and stay present. At least, for me."

Absolutely. For you.

My heart is beating a hundred miles a minute. Those last two words sounded so sweet, dripping from his lips with ease.

Relax and stay present, Journee. For him.

I wrap my arms around his torso, tightly, and lay my head against his chest again. There's nothing else I can do but breathe deeply and follow his lead.

There's so much going on right now. Entangled emotions flutter around us, thousands of thoughts swim around to find an entrance into our minds, and body heat rises between us.

As bad as I should be fighting this, I can't. I'm attached now.

Could he just be a distraction from my cheating husband? Could he be the side nigga that I needed in my life? I can't be doing this out of revenge.

Could I be craving the same attention, that Tripp is showing me right now, from my husband?

Davin is his own person but would I want him to be like Tripp? Am I trying to make him like Tripp? Is that why I was slowly becoming uninterested?

Nobody could be like Tripp but the same effort he's put into his marriage is the same effort that I want Davin to put in ours. I can't keep pleading Davin to be the man I need him to be. All he can do is be himself.

I can't continue to tolerate this lack of effort from him, especially when he's putting all of his energy into other women.

So, what can I do but leave him? While it may be a nasty battle and I may lose a plethora of things, at least I'd be at peace.

"Come back, J," Tripp whispers as he shivers down my spine with that deep tone.

I hope I don't seem so desperate and over dramatic but I'm melting over almost everything that Tripp is doing. I just can't fight my feelings and he seems to see that. It's hard to push this man away from me. Whatever he has makes me want to be closer to him.

If I could live in his arms, I would.

You can feel how much love is embedded in these arms and heart of his. Never-ending. Life-changing. Pure. Breathtaking. Addictive.

That's probably what drove me to agree to this idea of us being 'friends' again. I don't feel depressed and undervalued around him. I feel safe and secure.

"Alright, ladies and gents. It's time for us to take an intermission but we'll be back in about 15 minutes. Please enjoy your meals and time with your loved ones."

Wait a minute. Is it really over? That went by so fast.

I step out of Tripp's embrace, leaving this instant high, and take in what just happened. A shade of guilt falls over me and I remember why this shouldn't have happened.

I relived a fantasy I've had since the last day of our summer trip all those years back, only disappoint myself and think about my current situation.

Well, I guess it's time to wake up and eat.