I'm that type of packer that packs everything because I overthink things.

For example:

What kind of dress should I wear? If we're going somewhere fancy, I have to be dazzling.

What color is Davin wearing on the way there? We have to match.

Does this bathing suit show too much skin? Does it make my butt look big?

Could I wear these shoes in the sand?

Flip flops are a no-go. Last time I did that, sand went way up my leg and into my vagina. Hell no.

See what I mean? It's been hours since I started packing and have not one outfit in this suitcase.

I go down to take a nap, neglecting my luggage and clothes that are scattered all over the floor.

My eyes close and I drift off into paradise. My toes are digging in that deep, white sand and my body is stretched out on my towel.

I have an adult beverage in one hand and Davin's dick in the other, casually thrusting and teasing him. It'll work until we get back to the condo. At that point, he'll rip me apart.

Or he'll rip me up now because his hand is going up my thigh and, before I know it, he's at my-

"MOOOOOOMMMMM! MOMMAAAAAA!!!!! Nick won't give me my toy!"

"Well, tell Noah to stop wearing my underwear! That's nasty! You're too young to be playing with dolls anyway!"

There they go again.

Nobody told me that raising two prepubescent boys would be this much of a struggle. Nobody said that a smart ass ten-year-old and a disrespectful 12-year-old would give you problems.

And now, there are small problems every fifteen minutes. Nick wants his space, Noah's too old to play with action figures (according to Nick), Nick being picky about his food at ALL meal times, Noah crying whenever Nick calls him names, Nick screaming bloody murder when Noah even looks at his Playstation...

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Nick's stepping on Noah's action figure as he cries and kneels to the floor, attempting to pick it up from under Nick's foot.

Two of the smartest boys in the world but so petty at the same time. I thought having boys would be a little bit easier and that Nyla would be doing all of this.

Guess I was wrong.

As soon as I walk into the foyer, not even for two seconds, I hear "You pussy ass nigga! That's why ya daddy ain't here for your stupid ass!"

I'm standing here shocked as hell. That did not just come out of that little boy's mouth. We don't talk dirty around the kids unless we got code words but we haven't used those in a long time as you can see.

Noah's sobbing makes me rush by Nick's doorway and ask "What in the world is going on? And who said you can talk like that, boy? Watch your mouth."

"Man, ain't nobody got time for this. Take ya lil' toy like the punk you are," Nick says while kicking the action figure away from his door and almost slams the door.

I catch the door and push it open. He's not getting away with this behavior. I knew it was coming but not like this.

"Watch yourself, little boy. What's your problem?" I lean on the door frame as Nick rolls his eyes and takes his clothes out of his drawer.

"Nothing. He just get on my nerves. And you can't tell me what to do or say. You ain't my momma so get out of my room."

"Boy, are you crazy? I'm still an adult in here and, last time I checked, I pay bills in here. Therefore, I can step into any room I want. If you don't like it, you can leave-"

"Trust me, lady. I've been trying to leave since the day my dad married you."

Nick's lost his entire mind. I want to jerk him up so bad but then I remember something...

Nick hasn't been around as often anymore, giving him more time to be with his mom. Shockingly, Davin's been seeing his mom a little more as well and not just because it's court-ordered. When Nick goes back home, Davin stays longer than expected...

There's no telling what Nick's mom is putting in his head, what he's seeing when Davin and his mom are together, and what he sees his friends doing at school. He wants what his friends have, which are two-parent homes with their biological moms and dads. They're happily married and in love.

Nick wants that for Davin and his mom too.

I hold my hands up and leave the room, as if to hold up my white flag. I refuse to argue with a twelve-year-old that's still trying to deal with a rough divorce between his mom and dad.

Speaking of his dad...

"Ayyyyeeee! Y'all all packed up and ready to go in the morning?"

Here comes that fine piece of chocolate with his golfing outfit on and his gear over his left shoulder. He's always so cheerful and shit after he plays golf with my dad and his buddies.

"You need to talk to Nick. There's something wrong with him" I say as I step to the side and let Davin go up to Nick's room.

Nick is already exiting and is facing Davin with the most bogus ass pitiful look.

"Nick, are you alright? What's going on?" Davin asks as he looks Nick over.

Noah's coming out of his room, attempting to rid his face of the heavy rainfall that fell from his eyes. Hope appears in his eyes once he sees Davin in the foyer, like he was his saving grace.

You wanna know what this five-headed munchkin says?!

"Dad, Noah keeps wearing my underwear and ruining my clothes. He keeps peeing in them when he goes to bed at night. I don't think he has anymore. I told Ms. Journee and she didn't do anything about it. She just yelled at me."

My jaw drops to the floor and my eyes grow to the size of tennis balls as he's giving this terrible sob story. I look over to Noah and tears are building up in his eyes while he's holding his action figure tightly.

There's something about that action figure that makes Noah feel better. I can't even remember where he got that thing from.

Forget about that toy. Remember that smart-mouthed bully that your husband's supposed to be talking to?

Right. I want to roadhouse kick him so bad but I forget that he's just a kid...

A fucking smartass kid you just want to shake some sense and respect into sometimes...

Davin walks over to Noah and asks about the situation and Noah admits to it! That's when I become astounded!

"Noah, you need to start talking to us. Closed mouths don't get fed around here. We can get you some more underwear but you don't wear your brother's underwear. It's disgusting, Noah. Don't do that again. We'll get you your own later."

Davin's tone is very unsettling. It's sterner than it was when he was talking to Nick. That bothers me to no end because he's been talking to Noah like that lately.

Davin walks into Nick's room and shuts the door, leaving Noah to cry silently as he holds his action figure to his chest tightly.

What is up with this toy? Where did he get it from?

Nyla quickly runs to her brother and hugs him as I walk over there but Noah doesn't want her hug. In fact, he pushes her away and shakes his head.

"Hey, Nyla. Why don't you go back to your room and draw a picture for your brother? You know he loves your pictures," I say to make Nyla feel better.

I'm telling you, Noah has almost every drawing Nyla's made on his wall. He loves his little sister...unlike another boy in this house who shall not be named...

After she nods happily, she skips back to her room and I kneel down to an ashamed-looking Noah.

"Why didn't you tell Davin that he's being mean to you? I was there and watched him pick on you, sweetheart?"

Noah sobs even louder as I talk to him. He wipes his tears away so quick and turns his back to me.

All this crying and silence reminds me of one person. That double-crossing, tear-jerking, emotionally illiterate, poet that just so happens to be his daddy. It didn't matter how many times I told him to speak up. You never knew what was going on until it was too late...

And now, it's happening to Noah. Noah won't say a word when he's upset. In fact, he tries to walk away but I catch him and hold him in my arms.

Then, I'm reminded of where that action figure came from...

A few months after that mediation, Noah got something in the mail for his birthday. He looked at the box and didn't want to open up anything else but that box. When he opened it, he held it close to his heart and smiled.

Davin read the address and card, figuring out that it was from Noah's father. It was a heated topic around the house for days on end. We got into arguments over it and everything.

My heart sinks as I put two and two together. He misses his father.

"My sweet boy, you have to start speaking up for yourself. You have to tell us how you feel. Remember that nobody can take away your voice or tell you how to feel. The only way to fix your problems is to talk about them. Okay?" I say before wiping a few of his tears away. Maybe a tear or two falls down my face too.

Noah nods before he wipes his face roughly and departs from my embrace. He continues to hold that toy close to him and shuts his room door, just to cry even harder.

Noah's always been this sweet, cheerful, innocent boy. His teachers and friends always brag on him at school, our families always want to keep him and spend time with him, and he never fails to spread love wherever he goes.

Ever since we moved into this new house and Nick's been staying away, it's been different. It breaks my heart seeing Noah like this. It makes me want to cry seeing him like this.

"Baby, you ready for tomorrow?" I hear Davin call from behind me before wrapping his arms around me.

I shake my head unknowingly still thinking about what happened in the foyer. Noah looked up to Davin and he disappointed him.

He hurt my child all over again. Just like Nick did.

Thinking about all of this, I release myself from Davin's hold and say "Davin, I'm sorry but Nick can't stay with Nyla and Noah at Angie's house."

****

So tell me what you think of this chapter?

Rivalry against the brothers?

Is Journee really jealous of Nick's mother? Do you believe Davin's messing with her?

Did Noah deserve what Nick did to him?

Thanks for being patient with me! See you in the next chapter!