Once again, welcome to the semi-creative workings of my mind! This might be my favorite thing to do when I finish writing and posting a book; spilling all of the behind the scenes tea! There is some good stuff to tell when it comes to Matt and Hannah...so let's get started.

Writing Matt

He was such a dog in the first two books that I was seriously scared to tackle his redemption. I wasn't sure I could do it. But he weaseled into my heart at the end of More Than This. I NEEDED to give him a redemption arc because I knew he wasn't done healing. I knew so much more needed to happen in his life for real, true growth to occur.

Writing Hannah

She's a pistol but she's also got a soft heart. Loving Matt took her by surprise and I knew he would shake up her world. I just didn't know how much until I started writing them. I'll get to the drama, but building her character was a surprise to me. When I originally crafted her in MTT with that infamous morning after scene from Matt's POV, I planned her to be a random hook up. She's was supposed to be easy and clingy. Matt's worst nightmare.

Well, she was but in a totally different direction. She had a heart. She took care of him. And she put him in his place. I remember thinking, whoa who is this girl? When I wrote her, she took over the entire scene! That's not side character. She had heroine energy from the start so I figured she deserved an entire book!

Writing the conflict

I should make some kind of crazy "evolution of conflict" flow chart for this because if you only knew how nuts it got!! I always knew his dad would die and that would be the catalyst for some deep grief that pushed him away. But when I realized that Hannah would get pregnant, I knew that the two events together would be combustible.

At first, Matt wasn't going to pull away after his dad died. Hannah was going to be his rock. But it was going to be finding out about the baby right after the funeral that pushed him away. His fear of fatherhood was going to be the thing that did it.

But then that scene happened, the one in his bedroom with Hannah right after his dad died. And I knew, things needed to be different. He was going to push away for other reasons, and the baby would pull him back in. It was a reality check for him.

Writing that one scene...and then that other one

This being a college romance is different than the Fallbrook High stories. I'm not a spicy author, as you are probably aware (although Broken Lullaby brings the spice 🌶🌶🌶) so I felt the need to tread cautiously. They are older, but to be honest I'm not a fan of hook up stories or free love culture so I didn't want them to run immediately to bed. I had to have them fully together, fully connected and pretty fully committed first. That's just me.

And then that second scene had to be emotionally charged to the 10th degree. His pain needed soothing, and Hannah was really the only one who could be there for him. It's not uncommon in grief to need physical human connections so that scene made sense in terms of his headspace.

Writing his redemption

I had to get this boy some therapy. I wanted that chapter to feel real without being over the top. I also knew what he needed to work out and did that swiftly in one session.

Reality isn't like that. Matt's self awareness would not have happened that quickly. I made my guy able to read himself well, even in MTT when he finally saw his dad's character in himself and was horrified. That's the energy Matt brings - a desire to be better. He just got lost on the way for a little bit.

Writing to music

As always, I had a playlist before I even started writing this story. Matt came with a built in sound from MTT. Depeche Mode and Nirvana remained very inspirational.  But I needed to figure out Hannah. As you heard, she was the Cranberries and the Pet Shop Boys with some Garbage to top it off.

New Order's Blue Monday was a total game changer for me. It felt exactly like Matt's spiral downward. EVEN the in-stereo sound effect of spinning in the song inspired me. It was all about Matt knowing what he's doing, self destructing like no one's business, and hating himself for it. The only way he was going to pull out of the storm was the desire to be a better dad than he had.

Writing Fallbrook Hills

I'm so excited about adding more stories to this universe! Three stories strong in Fallbrook Hills, I never imagined while writing Garret and Amber's story that this is where they would take me. When I was writing April and Nico and realized that I could integrate Inevitable into the same universe, I went a little nuts. So now I have an entire universe of people, a town, backstories, origin story ideas and not enough time to get them out there. 

Well, as the saying goes, every journey begins with just one step. So I will "one step" it all the way to the finish...

How about a little peek at what's coming next? 

This is a snippet of one of the first chapters of All It Took, Jeff and Alison's story:

1.Alison

I'm sitting in the bleachers waiting for the dumb concert to end. This is not my band, and certainly not my music, but I am a good friend so I'm here. Misty is nothing if not quirky, in every aspect of life, and music is no exception.

Who in their right mind listens to freaky clowns playing heavy metal? If that is indeed what you can call this crap. I'm here in a plaid flannel and boots. Clown-girl next to me has full face paint and her clothes are practically shredded. How did I get myself into this mess?

Oh, right. I owed her a favor. I need to remind myself never to forget my keys and lock myself out of my apartment at three-thirty in the morning. If Misty hadn't picked me up at zero-Dark-o'clock and let me crash on her couch until my roommate got back from out of town, I wouldn't be surrounded by my worst nightmares. Honestly I don't think I'll be able to sleep for the rest of the year.

It's only February.

"I'm going to the bathroom!" I yell into Misty's ear. I need out of this circus and the bathroom is my only escape.

"What?" she yells back.

"BATHROOM!"

Misty finally nods in understanding and steps back so I can shove my way past more freaky clown fans. They look creepy but at least they step out of my way so I can exit the row.

I finally make it to the stairs. We're in row X, the only tickets either of us could afford on part time salaries. It was a long way down and steep, on top of how high we were. My stomach coils in nerves, not exactly enjoying high places. Especially ones surrounded with, yeah, clowns.

I make it exactly six rows before I loose my balance. I'm sure it's just my perception. I'm not really falling, but I instinctively reach out to grab the rail as I feel that feeling, the one where you know gravity has taken over and your face is about to make friends with the concrete.

My hand misses the rail and I gasp, awaiting the inevitable pain on its way. But I never hit the ground. I never even fall half way. Something has stopped my fall, something warm, and strong.

Something not painted to look like a clown who wanted to eat me.

I look up into the face of my rescuer and audibly sigh. Thank goodness for the decibel level, because the gorgeous face staring at me would have turned to run the other direction if he had heard it. Tall, brown hair and eyes, a little dimple in his chin...this guy is, wow.

No face paint to be seen on him, or any ripped clothing. Just a dark blue button up shirt with the hint of a white T-shirt peeking out. I quickly glance down to see black washed jeans molded around strong thighs. My heart rate just increased by a thousand.

And he has boots on. I think I'm in love.

STORY COMING SOON!!

Don't forget that Broken Lullaby (ebook version) will be FREEEEEEEE  from October 31st to November 4th on Amazon and the paperback will be on sale. Got the Kindle App? It's free to download! Check my bio page for a link to the Amazon book!!