"The hardest part of being at Cooper's estate was pretending to stay calm, all the while knowing that any day could be my last."
-Isla Blume

TEMPEST

All the passengers of the Mayflower gather in a great hall at the head of the ship for the social, where Emperor Oshiro and Yuri will welcome everyone alongside the higher ranking officials on duty for the trip to Janus. My parents, while diplomats, didn't make the cut for top officials at the head table, who are shaking hands with passengers who choose to greet them, so I meet my parents toward the buffet once I've arrived.

I didn't know what to wear. I know it's trivial, but I didn't want to stand out. Neo is probably in the room somewhere, serving people or tending to Yuri. And then, of course, there's Yuri, who—like me—may be programmed with a bomb should his emotions become too unstable. I wonder if he knows about what Gunther Quail did to the Perfects generation, I think. I wonder if anyone knew. But they must have, right? Otherwise, how would Esther have found out?

My mind is reeling, as one final doubt enters my mind: Maybe Neo was right that this is all one big conspiracy. He's older than me, after all. He may remember the war, at least a little, while I definitely don't have any memory of it at all.

I feel uneasy as I push through the crowd, mumbling "excuse me" and "sorry" as I walk. I tuck my sleek black hair that I've straightened for the event behind my ear, and pick up the skirt of my plain, black cotton dress so as not to get it stepped on. The neckline dips into a V that I've occupied with a long, gold necklace. It was re-purposed from one of Celia Rivera's armor designs from the war. At the end of the thin, gold chain is one singular golden spike, a little weathered now. That is the only sparkle I wear, which is tough for me, as I love to stand out normally. Not tonight... maybe not again for the next thirteen years.

Oh man, this is going to be a long trip.

I find my mom and dad munching on some fruit at the end of the buffet, and mumble the rest of the way to them. Mom opens her arms to me, and I walk into her embrace without any argument.

"Feeling more at home? Or is this just an act?" she whispers as she holds me.

I shrug. "I just need a hug."

Her tone changes and she tightens her hold. "Okay."

I pull away after a few deep breaths in her arms, and move my gaze between her and Dad as I ask, "What do you know about the Perfects' DNA?"

Dad shakes his head. "That information is kept in Hicksmon. Your mom and I knew you were ours, and we didn't really care to find out who anyone else was."

Mom tries to stifle a guilty look. She looks to the ground, trying not to let her lips move from their relaxed position, but failing.

"You know about the explosives, don't you?"

"What?" Mom asks, genuine shock showing through her wide eyes and furrowed brows.

"That the Perfects are implanted with them?" Their faces are blank. "You really don't know, do you? Esther left me a message saying that was the case."

Mom scoffs. "I don't know about that. Where did she get that information?"

"She didn't say." Could Esther have been misinformed? The tension in my chest dissipates. If Neo and Mom and Dad all don't believe this crazy idea, maybe it really is just that: Too crazy to be true.

Mom smiles. "Just try to enjoy your night. I'll call Bea and Isla when we are done here to see if they have any idea what Esther is talking about."

"She didn't want us to call them. She said she was running away to Japan to meet us."

Concern fills Dad's face, as he hands off his plate of fruit to Mom. She turns to him and nods. "You're calling?"

"Yeah," he says. He places his hand on my shoulder as some sort of half-hearted pat on the back or something, and gently pushes his way through the crowd and back to their room to call. As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew it was the right thing to do. Esther ran away from home with some crazy idea in her head about explosives and conspiracy. She should be found, and our family needs all the information they can get to find her. I shouldn't have believed her, or kept her secret for as long as I did.

My guilt must show through, because my mom hands me a honeydew slice to chew on instead of my thoughts, and says, "You did the right thing telling us."

I inhale deeply and let the juicy sweetness of the fruit calm me before I respond. "I'm not sure about anything I'm doing anymore."

Mom sort of smiles in confusion, but before she can say anything to try to make me feel better, Emperor Oshiro turns on a microphone that sounds throughout the room's speaker system. He is an older man, thin and gentle in stature, but one of those people who has commanded so much respect throughout his life, no amount of aging could chip that away. Everyone silences as soon as his soft voice asks us to "come together."

"Thank you," he says as the room turns to listen to him. The grey walls and illuminated in different colored lights, but he and the other officials, including Yuri, who I do my best not to look at for fear of how that might make me feel, stand on a raised platform where a long table has been set up for the officials to sit on a panel of sorts.

People in the room begin moving, and as I look around I see that the other passengers are taking seats at set tables that had been hidden behind bodies when I first entered the room. Mom takes my hand, pausing before she guides me to one of the nearby tables where I can squint to see our names have been written on place cards. She gives me a look as if to ask if it's okay for her to hold my hand, so I smile and close my eyes in a subtle nod. I'm the one making my life harder... not my parents. At least, not anymore. I follow my mom to the table and take a seat at the place where a small, folded card written in a fancy script reads, "Tempest Becker."

When I lift up the place card to take a closer look at my name, I notice something else... a message written on the inside fold of the card. I pull it close to my body so that only I can read it, just in case it's a message from someone my mom doesn't know I'm talking to. Someone like Neo.

"Meet me in the observation room after the social," the note reads, though it isn't signed. Whoever wrote it must have assumed I would have known. The guilt consumes me all over again.

"What's wrong?" Mom asks.

"Nothing." I crumple the note in my palm and tuck it into my dress sleeve.

"Welcome to the Mayflower," Emperor Oshiro says once the room has settled. Dad's seat is still empty. He must have gotten a hold of someone in Hicksmon. I'm anxious to hear what is actually going out over there. Down there? Out there?

The emperor continues, "You have all sacrificed a great deal to be with us here today, and the ship officials and myself cannot thank you all enough for participating in this next exploration of our species. Roberts' crew traveled to Janus many years ago, and returned without a single memory of their travels. There is no promise that this trip will be any safer or more productive than theirs, and yet, here you still are. Thank you."

He pauses for applause, which is promptly given as soon as he pulls the microphone away from his mouth. Yuri is sitting beside him, clapping along with the rest of us, and I can't stop myself from looking. He is wearing a similar suit to the one he wore before we took off, and as I'm admiring how handsome he looks, his eyes find mine in the crowd. I want to look away, but for some reason, I can't. He stares at me without smiling as his father continues talking about some blah-blah-blah gratitude for blah-blah-blah, I'm not listening. All my senses blur in Yuri's sight.

He still hasn't smiled at me—and I have no idea what my face is doing either—but now my guilt turns to anxiety. Does he know about Neo? Is Yuri upset with me that I stayed on the Mayflower? Or is he just trying to be professional?

Mom nudges me, allowing me to break from Yuri's gaze. "Listen," she whispers.

"Yeah, okay," I say.

"Our scientists have brought with them some very promising equipment. If they are able to put their theories into practice, they may be able to build a Faster Than Light Drive for our ship, allowing the sacrifice you made for thirteen years to collapse into a matter of moments. With this possibility, we may be able to reach and colonize Janus before you age another year. They built prototypes back on Earth, so we are very hopeful that they will transfer into an applicable device for the Mayflower."

He moves himself away from the microphone again, cuing applause, and I glance back at Yuri by the emperor's side. He's no longer looking at me. His eyes are glued to the floor in front of their table. I check if there's anything there to see, but don't see anything. Yuri must be feeling just as anxious as I am... but why?

Now I hope the note is from him. I guess I will see.

"Isn't that exciting?" Mom asks.

"What?"

"The FTL Drive... isn't that exciting?"

"Oh, yeah. Definitely."

She smirks. "C'mon, you were so upset with me that your life would be wasted away on this ship, and now we may get to see the new world in a fraction of the time we had planned to spend in transit." The applause begins to die down, so Mom whispers, "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing. Just... it's just a lot of information at once." I'm not lying, I'm just too overwhelmed with everything to react.

Then Dad sneaks his way back in, and I take a deep breath, making room in my body for more news to undoubtedly be overwhelmed with. The emperor continues with more news about the trip, but now I'm too busy focusing on Dad to hear the words coming out of the emperor's mouth.

"So," I start to whisper when Dad sits at his seat beside Mom, "what did they say?"

He exhales. "What Esther told you is true," he whispers so only Mom and I can hear. "A boy from Esther's graduating class spontaneously combusted after Esther's friend Kayleigh hacked into the DNA database and released it at graduation. Esther found out her real identity and ran off. They haven't found her yet, but the World Alliance is after Kayleigh for her crime."

Mom curses beneath her breath, while I suddenly find myself needing to catch mine.

"Does that mean that I might...?"

"Spontaneously combust?" Dad responds. He gulps. "Yes, I believe so. We'll need to test every person from your generation on this ship to make sure we are safe, because... it gets worse."

"How?" Mom asks, her whisper nearly rising to interruption volume.

"Some of the Perfects... some of them are equipped with nuclear-level explosives."

I struggle to breathe. We are floating in space and any one of the Perfects—Yuri and I included—could set it off, killing us all. Before I realize what I'm doing, I find myself standing up in the middle of the room. I'm gasping for air, clutching my neck to loosen it somehow. Yuri stands from his chair, a look of worry and confusion on his face.

I have to calm myself down before... before I go off. Maybe. Before I maybe kill us all.

My parents leap up and escort me out of the room. I think I hear Yuri command Neo to go with us. It's all a blur.

So much for not standing out.