Namjoon was the best thing that ever happened to me.

        We took long walks together, went to the movies together, I was always over at his house when I wasn't at Rachel's and even his smile would brighten up my mood. You would think as much as we are going out to spend time with each other, you would say that we were dating.

        Wrong.

        I loved Namjoon, but it seemed we would always be just best friends. We acted like it too, even though he doesn't know what my real feelings are. We would wrestle each other, pick on each other, and do what all best friends always did.

        Sometimes though, Namjoon would joke around with us being in a relationship and always ending with, "Wouldn't that be just weird?" He laughed. My heart sank as I agreed. He threw arm around around me, making my pulse go up.

        "I love you, Sungmin." Najoon said. "Let's be best friends forever." Ouch, that kind of hurt. Being friend zoned and all. I took a shaky breath in. "I hope so too." I looked at the ground.

        "Sungmin, is something wrong? Did I do something?" Namjoon studied me. We were both standing in the school hallway. Before I could answer, Rachel came up and give Namjoon and I a back hug. Rachel saved me from me lying to Namjoon. Namjoon's mood changed as he turned around and said hey to Rachel.

        Namjoon's mood always changed though when Rachel shows up. He would smile at her differently than he would smile at me. Looked at her differently than he looked at me. He even acted different when she was around. Sometimes it made me uncomfortable that they may like each other and haven't told me. So that afternoon I came to settle it when I went over to Rachel's.

        "Do you like Namjoon?" I sat in her bed awkwardly. She stopped in her tracks.

        "Why wouldn't I." She said. I held my breath. Crap she does like him. "He's our best friend." I let out my breath. Thank God. Rachel looked at me as I began to bit my lip and fold my hands together. She studied me until she popped up the question.

        "Do you like him?" She came over and sat next to me. I didn't responded, but only putting my head down to hide my blushing. Rachels gasps and stood up, pointing at me.

        "Oh so you do like him!" I lifted my head, with my eyes wide. "No! Well... I... I... Fine I do." I let out. Rachel sat back down and clutched my arm.

        "How cute, wait till he finds out." She squealed.

        "No You can't tell him! Rachel you have to promise never to tell him!" I looked at her. She smiled and promised.

        "But, why won't you tell him." Rachel questioned.

        "Because I'm sure he doesn't feel the same way and if I do tell him, I might lose the friendship we have now." I bit my lip hard.

        "Oh..." was all Rachel said. We sat in silence for awhile until my phone buzzed of a text message.

        Namjoon: Hey, I'm bored. Want to hang out at our cafe? :)

        My heart skipped a beat. Rachel leaned over and read the message. She smiled from ear to ear.

        "Don't you say a word about it Rachel!" Rachel giggled and pushed me to stand up.

        "Go." She said. My face turned red and I replied to the text.

        Me: I'd love too. Be there in 5.

        I reached the cafe, the one we always go too. It was like our secret spot, but not really. I looked around to see if Namjoon was here yet. Then my eyes caught him through the window, sitting on one of the couches. I smile and fix my hair.

        I walked in and made eye contact with Namjoon.  A smile spread across his face. I smiled back and sat down next to him.

        "Hey." Was all he said.

        "Hi." I said back. He looked at me and smiled, showing his cute dimples. I melted a little inside and looked down to the floor.

        "Do you want some coffee? I'll go buy you some." He offered. "No thanks, I don't drink coffee." He threw one arm around me, hugging me tight. I shut my eyes and bit the insides of my cheeks. He lets go and smirks.

        "You know what I just thought of?" Namjoon looked at me.

        "What." I said.

        "We have been best friends for a couple months now and you have been over to my house so many times and I have never even been once to yours." He added on. "Can I come over today?" He asked.

        "No!" My mouth spoke faster than my mind. He looked at me in alarm with one eyebrow up.

        "I mean, it's not possible,  you can't..." I rambled on. I didn't want to get him involved with my parents, my terrible life, and my history. He deserves better. I've always been so cautious when I let people in my life. But usually when someone does come in, they leave getting hurt. I am literally a nightmare waiting to happen.

        I looked over at Namjoon, whose puppy dog eyes were still on me. Big mistake. I gave in.

        I began telling him about my parents and how they always fight. My siblings who now left me, and most importantly my history and what i've been though. If I can last recall, I counted at least eight times where I was in a situation where I could of died.

        Namjoon listened closely and I never realized I talked for so long that the sun went down now. I even told him the most painful stories that I have never told Rachel about. By the end I was in tears. Namjoon pulled me in his arms to comfort me.

        "In all our friendship, I would have never guessed..." I cried even harder, now some peoples eyes were on us. I broke away from Namjoon and wiped my tears.

        "Sorry." I said.

        "No worries, it's good to cry once in a awhile." He took his fingers and wiped the missed fallen tears off my face.

        "Hey, then wanna come over to my home." His face lighted up. "We can watch a movie or something."

        "It's late. I should probably get home." I said. But no matter how much I wanted to say yes I had to give up spending time with Namjoon to go and face my dad.

        "Oh that's right." His voice lingered out. He knew exactly what I meant. It seemed easily now too, not to lie about my life anymore to him, making excuses, but at the same time it can still be dangerous.

        "Yeah..." We both got up. Namjoon paused and looked at me.

        "Hey, since I can't walk you home, can you walk me home then?" He said cutely. I nodded.

        Namjoon didn't live far away from Rachel's house. Actually It was just right across the street from her. Namjoon and I took the long way. He seemed to be so interested in my life, so I went on and told more stories to him.

        "Man, you're a tough girl then." Namjoon pointed out. I rolled my eyes. Namjoon smirked and hit me with his elbow.

        "I like tough girls." I blushed with my pulse rising. He thinks I'm a tough girl and likes them. I smiled to the ground.

        "I guess that's why we're friends." Namjoon said. My smile dropped. Of course I should of known, friendzoned once again.

        "Yeah I guess." By that time we finally reached his house. We walked up to his door and then he turned to face me. I held my breath as he looked me in the eye. He leaned in closer to me and put his hand on my arms. This is it. I think he is going to kiss me. I leaned in closer also and smiled up at him. He did the same.

        "Be safe going home." He said. I mentally face palmed myself hard. It felt like my heart just shattered into a million pieces, of course he wouldn't kiss me. We are just friends. I nodded and backed up, feeling stupid for falling for Namjoon's misleading affection. Namjoon let go of my arms, dropping them to his side.

        "Bye." I was about to turn around, but stopped when I heard Namjoon say my name. I turned back to him, Namjoon embraced me. I hugged him shortly, we both said goodbye, and I walked away as he went into his house.

        "Where in the hell have you been?" I walked through the door of my house to my dad with his arms crossed, one hand holding a beer bottle.

        "With a friend." I walked pasted my dad, who grabbed me by my arm tight.

        "You should've called, Sungmin." My dad barked. I can see had too much to drink tonight. I know he's drunk, because when he's sober he could care less if I was dead or alive.

        "Since when do you care about me going out, you could care less if I was dead. Just go back to your festive drinking and i'll be in my room if you need me." I said with an attitude. After I said it, I realized I made a mistake and would be paying for it. I was right.

        My dad took his hand, that held his beer bottle and hit me across the face. The bottle busted, leaving pieces of glass on the floor. I took my hand and touched my bleeding face. My dad reached his hands, wrapping them around my throat tight. I was struggling for air.

        My mom walked into the room and ran to my dad to pull him away. My dad let go, turned around and nailed my mom in the face with his fist. She staggered back and I ran to catch her before she fell on the glass filled floor. My dad on the other hand began to shout and throw more empty beer bottles.

        "Go to your room and don't call the police." My mother said between her gritted teeth. I nodded and ran to my room. I locked the door behind me and went into the closet. For some reason I felt safe when I was in there, but really I was never safe. I pulled out my phone and dial Namjoom's number.

        "Hello." Namjoon picked up.

        "Namjoon, listen to me. You have to call the police." I said.

        "Why can't you call them." I took a breath.

        "Because my mom doesn't want me too and I promised. Plus, what if my dad finds out..." I heard a crash coming from the kitchen. My face was stinging from the hit where my dad slammed the bottle to my face.

        "Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did your dad hurt you?" Namjoon asked me. More crashes came from the kitchen.

        "I'm so scared, Namjoon." That's all I said. Tears began to spill from my eyes and I began to cry. I never cried though theses times anymore which is weird now that I am. I could hear yelling, and my dad hitting my mom.

        "I'll call the police and i'll be right there."

        "Namjoon don't come-" But it was too late, Namjoon already hung up. He will probably get my address from Rachel.

        I took the phone and looked at it. My blood was wiped across the screen. Then I heard a gun go off. My heart picked up and I had to do something. I walked, grabbing a small pocket knife off my table for self defense.

        I slowly approach the kitchen, the knife hidden in my hand. I peer around to see my dad having a gun in his hand, his back facing me. My mom had a pan in her hand and meet eye contact with me. It seemed that she was holding her stomach, then it was bleeding. I nodded my head giving her a sign that I have a plan. She slowly nodded and I count to three with my fingers.

        When I hit three, I charged at my dad from behind, throwing my arms around him. I used my skills of fighting that my brother taught me when we were little. I took him to the ground and sat on top of him, restraining his arms. My mom comes and hits him across the head with the pan, making him go unconscious. I get off of him and take the gun out of his hand. And thats when my mom fainted.

        By this time the police charged in taking my dad off the floor. The police took me outside to question us as nurse's came to tend to my mom. After giving my side of the story to the police, I heard someone call my name out.

        It was Namjoon.

        He ran up to me and gave me a huge hug. When we broke apart he cupped both his hands on my bloody face. I began to cry.

        "You're not okay then."  Namjoon took me back his arms.

        "We have to take her and her mother to the hospital to get checked out." A police man said as he came up to us.

        "You can get a ride with us." The police man added. Namjoon nodded, taking my hand to lend me to ambulance that just showed up.

        The car ride was silence. Namjoon put his arm around and pulled me close to his chest. It was nice, but bad timing. My mom laid on the bed, with a mask on her face and a nurse who kept applying pressure to her wound to stop some of the bleeding. I slowly fell asleep in Namjoon's arms until we got to the hospital.

        When I got to the hospital, the nurses cleaned up my face. It wasn't that bad as it looked. They only had to pull out a couple of small bits of broken glass. On the other hand though, my mom was pretty badly hurt. She had far more bruises than me, not to mention where my dad shot her in the lower stomach. Once I was finished and was good to go, Me and Namjoon stopped by my mom's room. She was faintly awake laying in the hospital. I ran over and grabbed her hand.

        "Mom..." I let out tears.

        "Go...go... stay with him at his house for awhile until I get released from the hospital." She was pointing at Namjoon. My eyes got wide.

        "Namjoon's house?" I looked over to Namjoon. He only shrugged.

        "Your father is... is... going to jail." Well that part didn't surprise me at all.

        "I love you, Sungmin." That was all she said before she closed eyes and the monitor went to a long beep. Nurses and doctors rushed in, only pushing me and Namjoon out of the room. They shut the door, leaving me and Namjoon out in the hall. I stood still, soulless.

        "It's not your fault." Namjoon put a hand on my shoulder.

        "Not my fault?" I looked at him.

        "My mom could be dead in there and you say it's not my fault!" My voice rose, tear coming from my eyes.

        "Sungmin..." He tried to pulled me into him. I pushed him away.

        "You don't get it do you? Do you really pity me because of how crappy my life is? If you are then stop it. This is no community service Namjoon" I'm about to lose it, I feel it in my bones.

        "I don't pity you, Sungmin. You can't help of what just happened." Namjoon eyes burned on me.

        "I could have saved my mom, but no, I hid like a coward until I hit my breaking point to go out there and face such a devil, my dad. That's the least I could do." I turned and began to beat the door and then the wall. I screamed and cursed everything I could think of to curse at. Which wasn't much.

        My feelings broken, I feel like I have no heart anymore that it was ripped from my chest. I fell to my knees. I couldn't do anything about any of this, but cry. I have no control and that's what makes me mad. Namjoon squats down, grabs my shoulders and pulls me up.

        "Come on, I'll take you home so you can pack some clothes and we will head to my house." Namjoon lead me down the hallway. This is it. My mom could be dead and I'm convinced she is dead and my dad's in jail. Lastly Namjoon could be the next person that I hurt. I need to distance him before it's too late.