September

Skye

"Skye!! Over here," Ben called out my name from across the beer garden, gaining not only my attention but also that of those on surrounding tables. Once upon a time that would have made me slink away in embarrassment, however lately I had been thriving in the attention.

Ben and I had been hanging out more and more along with his group of friends. Admittedly they are all a few years younger than me, and definitely wilder than I ever was, but I think I was taking it in my stride and fitting in well.

For months my life had been a constant routine of Monday to Friday work, then Friday to Sunday drinking and partying. I'm sure if I saw a psychologist like my mum had been wanting me to, they would say it's a coping mechanism where I'm shutting out my real problems. They would be right, I wasn't  in denial about it, I was just unwilling to do anything to stop it. The flow of orgasms from the thrill of random one night stands didn't seem to be negatively effecting me either.

I slid onto the empty chair at the bar table at the same time as a drink was placed in front of me. "Looking hot tonight Skye," Katie, one of Ben's and by association now, my friend says.

I had opted for a pair of high waisted pants and a black lace cropped cami. It was a basic outfit, certainly covering up more than usual, but still drew attention to my waist and tits, meaning it had its desired effect to gain attention.

"She could pull at least five guys just walking in here the slut," Ben said pointedly staring at my cleavage. "Are you even wearing a bra?"

"Shut up Ben. You're just jealous I won't let you have a taste." It had become a well known joke between all of us that Ben and I would never ever hook up, yet the comments about each others bodies and sex lives were slung between us constantly.

"Babe, you couldn't handle a ride on this dick," he retorted.

"Will you two just fuck already?" Tyler shouts across the table which caused us both to share a disgusted look at the idea.

"That would be like fucking my brother," I scowled. It honestly would. Ben has been the rock I needed the last few months. He pulled me out of my shell and thrust me into his world holding my hand along the way. It's the distraction I've needed.

The conversation shifted around me, I listened in, but i was also scouting the crowd to see if there's anyone hook up worthy around. Ever since I let myself fall into bed with Chris, there had been a string of random hook ups. Sometimes we would just make out in a corner, occasionally I may have been known to have a quickie in a bathroom, or if I'm really feeling it, we would take it home. There's or mine, I wasn't fussy.

It wouldn't happen every weekend, I'm not that much of a slut, but it was often enough that my number grew considerably. Given it started at two, Michael and before him was Adam who I was with for three months the summer between year 11 and 12. In a blur of summer romance let him unceremoniously take my virginity on a park bench with our friends drinking UDL's and Jim Beam on the swing set all of fifteen meters away. It was over in three minutes and completely unsatisfying. We got better at it over the rest of that summer though, and yes, moved things to a bedroom too.

My phone buzzed on the table in front of me, snapping me out of memory lane. Figuring it was probably my mum or brother, who if I didn't respond within five minutes they would start calling me, I checked it right away.

Lizzy- Hey Skye, long time no speak, I miss you. Do you think we could hang out soon? Hope you're doing ok.

A pang of guilt rushed through me, making me reach for my drink and guzzle it down in just a few mouthfuls. Lizzy has been my best friend since the first day of high school. When mum sent me to an all girls high school that none of my primary school friends were attending I had no one. That first day, Lizzy was also all alone so we sat beside each other. From then we were inseparable. Twelve years of friendship. We shared everything with each other.

Until recently.

I felt like a terrible person for pulling away from her. Like I said, she was there for everything, especially when Michael died. She picked up the pieces of me and held them together. The only problem is, Lizzy reflected everything that was my old life. She didn't fit into this new version of me and honestly if she knew the person that was sitting at this table right now, I don't think she would like me that much.

I'm not sure I liked me that much. It was easier this way though. It was easier to be this whole other person. The slutty Skye who likes to drink and party wasn't hurting and she wasn't alone, at least physically. She can bury her guilt in a strangers sheets mixed with alcohol and bad decisions where she can't see it or feel it.

It was easier than sitting in that damn house all alone where even though his things were gone, the ghost of him was still there. Every where I looked there was Michael. There were hopes and dreams of a life I spent so long building. Being someone else meant disassociating myself from those memories. Even if it was just long enough to forget for a night. One day at a time.

I closed out of the text without replying. I ignored the string of grey boxes, and serious lack of blue replies in that text thread. It was just another thing to feel guilty about.

"Who's up for shots?" I called out across the table to a chorus of cheers. "Perfect, I'll be back!" I said as I stood up and shoved my phone into my back pocket. Alcohol was always my answer to the guilt trying to be heard knocking hard on my door.

"Don't get lost on some poor unsuspecting cock before you return with the shots," Ben grins at me.

"As long as it's not yours," I stuck my tongue out at him, new Skye already pushing the text from Lizzy into the back row.

We moved on from the beer garden to the nightclub sometime after the table of guys beside us with mullets and try hard moustaches tried mooching onto us girls. Their sloppy beer breaths not doing it for us at all. I don't know when or how the mullet became a thing again. If we're bringing back looks from the past, at least choose the boy brand era.

The club was packed. The music vibrated through my entire body as Katie and I grind against each other in the middle of the dance floor. I had been a good girl so far. I'm not sure I could say the same for the rest of the group. We lost Ben to a flaming red head with tits for days not long after arriving and I knew Katie was working on her chosen suitor for the night by the way she is moving her hips against mine.

"I'm going to go to the bar," I yelled into Katie's ear and she nodded, but didn't follow, likely choosing that moment to strike on her prey. I wasn't drunk, but was certainly tipsy enough to be heading that way. I ordered a Vodka 196 from the bartender accepting my drink as a tatted hand landed on the bar beside me.

"I'll have the same as her," he nods to the young chick who served me. My gaze followed the tattoo's on his arm until I reached his smirking face. Well hello there.

Mr tattoo traced my body in a similar way, landing on my chest for a beat longer than necessary before darting back up to my face. I knew in that moment I'd found the end point of my night.

We each chug our cans of vodka and then wordlessly he took my hand and lead me back to the dance floor. He hadn't even introduced himself to me verbally, yet his body was all over mine. It was different to other guys I'd hooked up with who were all too keen to tell me about themselves and usually what they wanted to do to me. The mystery drew me in more.

The beat of the music now vibrated through the both of us, the heat of the club and peoples bodies all smashed together on the dance floor made it hot and sweaty. I needed a breather. Mr Tattoos got the message when I slowed my movements and took steps away from the crowd. He took my hand and led me to a corner. It's not quiet but it's void of so many people and lights.

"What's your name beautiful?" He asked me, tracing his fingers softly down my arm, then back up across my collarbone and gently over the swell of my breasts causing me to arch towards him ever so slightly.

"Skye, and you?" I replied, tilting my head up, because what I wanted next was to kiss him.

"Jordan," he responded before reacting exactly how I wanted him to and lowered his lips to mine.

Jordan was addictive. We made out in the club for a bit, then he suggested moving the party back to his place. As per Ben and my rule, I made sure my location was turned on and got into an Uber with Jordan.

We drove out to the suburbs, thankfully the same side of the city I lived on. That meant getting home later wouldn't cost me too much. I had been stung a few times like that. We pulled up to a house with a number of cars out the front.

"I take it these aren't all your cars?" I joked, but was also fishing for a little more information on the house I was walking into.

"Nah, one's my brothers but he's out of town with his girlfriend. Then my other housemate and I guess he has a few friends over. Is that ok? It won't just be us," he asked and I respected that he checked.

"How bad can it be?" I smiled. New Skye was generally up for any good time. Jordan sure proved to be an adventure I kept going back to.

We walked into the house and Jordan led me out the back where a group of guys sat around a table. It stunk of weed, which made me screw my nose up. There was a bong in the middle of the table and I quickly noticed signs of other drugs that I assumed were the remnants of lines of coke. I wasn't really exposed to that world nor familiar with it enough to be sure.

Nerves took over me a little bit, I was into the drinking and partying, but drugs hadn't ever been on the table. Jordan introduced me to everyone, but I guessed noticed my hesitation. It's crazy how from that first night he was so in tune with me.

"Hey, we don't have to stay out here, we can go to my room," he murmured and I nodded. His room with him was something I was far more comfortable with, even though I'd only known him a few hours.

"Do you do any of that?" I asked him as he closed the door behind me.

"I smoke pot occasionally. But not the hard stuff so much. Have you ever tried?"

"No, never." I took in the room I was in. Bed, desk, TV. All dark Timbers, dark sheets and extremely masculine. Jordan's aftershave lingered in the air, the same one I had smelt when he kissed me in the club.

"We can stay in here. I'd much rather be getting high on you than on any of that out there," he winked and I laughed out loud.

"Smooth." I liked that he made me comfortable.

When he took his shirt off and stepped closer to me I was pleasantly surprised to find more tattoos across his shoulder and down to his chest. He kissed me hard, forcing me onto my back on the bed. We were going from flirty to fucking in forty second.

"I was looking at these tits long before I came up to you at the bar," he admitted. "I was imaging how you would squirm if I bit down on your nipple while tugging the other one and how wet it would make you."

"Oh fuck," I moaned when he pulled down my top and did exactly as he just said.

"Are you wet for me Skye?" He asked in a demanding tone and I whimpered. Of the hook ups I'd had, none had been dominant.

"Show me. Take your pants off and show me," I did as he said. "Spread your legs. I want to see."

It was hot. Jordan was hot. And as he watched my legs spread open on the bed, absolutely dripping he shed himself of his own jeans and briefs pulling his cock out. He revealed another tattoo low on his hip and was that? Oh fuck a piercing. My eyes widened and his grin got cockier.

"Have you ever been fucked with a piercing before?" He asked, raising one brow and I shook my head, totally intrigued. "I'll have you begging for more in no time."

Jordan hardly waited. He slid his fingers between my legs spreading my arousal around as he circled my clit. "So wet for me. Are you ready to feel my cock now?"

I nodded and he took his cock in one hand running it up and down my wet, throbbing pussy. The sting of the cold metal against my heat only intensified the moan I let out and when he entered me I barely contained a scream not even caring about the other people in the house. I could feel the piercing hitting my inner walls every time he thrust and I never wanted the feeling to end.

When I emerged from Jordan's room a few hours later, everyone was gone and the house was silent. He waited out the front with me for an Uber to arrive before making sure we exchanged numbers.

At the time I didn't know for sure if I was going to use it. We had lay there getting to know each other for hours after we had sex, we got along really well and not just physically. He was funny and hot. Neither of us wanted a relationship, but the sex was good. When I got a text from him a few weeks later, we met up again. We fucked, then we parted ways. He became the perfect booty call.

Jordan seemed to know I was going through something, but he never asked. Just like I never asked him anything about his life. Occasionally I hung out at his place, and sometimes he would come out with Ben and I. It was never deeper than friends and sex. Most of all though, it helped me to keep my old Skye away for a little bit longer.

A/N

You may have noticed this has all been in past tense so far (or I've tried to). It's been tough for me and honestly I've had this sitting here waiting for me to proof it because when I write I keep switching. After this chapter we stop looking back at the last few months and move forward to present day. I know it's not usually done and I may go back and edit later, but I'm also going to change to the present tense. Hopefully I don't confuse anyone!!