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44. Breakup

Sharynn POV

She knew she was in a mess.

She had feelings for Richard, even though she cared a lot for Trenton. What was she supposed to do? She went to her mother for advice.

"Mom, did you always know that Dad was the one?"

"Yes," her mother said without hesitation while she helped her with Sunday dinner after church.

Not sure why she asked when she knew that would be the answer. She guessed she wanted to hear something else from her. That maybe there were several guys she had an interest in but her father happened to be the first to say something. Or that her first crush broke her heart or something.

Her parents had been together since high school. They each had not dated anyone else. They dated through college and never even broke up. Married soon after they graduated. She never remembered her mother or father discussing other people they liked growing up.

It was the way her life was supposed to be with Richard.

"What about before dad?" She was stubborn, she had to ask. Maybe there was a boy years before her father that she might have ended up with.

"It was always your father, even before I knew I liked boys, I knew your father was the one for me."

She rolled her eyes at that. This was no help! Was Richard supposed to be that for her, and because he messed up years ago, they were derailed, only to come back together?

"Why are you asking me this?" Her mother cut the oven off so that she could take out the lasagna she prepped before church which was now piping hot and done.

"Ummm-"

"Don't ummm me, little girl, use your words."

"I just wanted to know how you knew if you never even dated anyone else. Maybe Dad was not the one but because you never even tried-"

"Why would I if your father gave me everything I needed? Not saying our lives together have been perfect, but whenever there is an issue, we work it out, not run away from it." Her mother put her hand on her hip. "The problem with you young folk is, you give up too fast. Despite the highs and lows that come with any relationship, you hit one little rocky road and you give up."

For sure her mother was talking about her and Richard. His cheating was considered a rocky road?

Maybe he had changed.

Richard was the man she planned her life with when she was younger. She planned the wedding, planned them buying their first home, planned them traveling the world, and planned when they would have a family. They would have three children. Two girls and a boy. She already had their names.

She never gave up on that dream and now Richard was offering her a chance to get back on track with that dream.

What about Trenton?

Could she have a life with him? She cared for him, but did she love him? He was so different from Richard it was like night and day. Richard was tall, slim, model-good looks, and had more money than he could spend in a lifetime. While she found Trenton attractive, he was short, and a bigger guy...which she found sexy hence why she called him her teddy bear. He made decent money, but not enough for the lifestyle she wanted.

He was not her ideal guy in any way.

Richard was everything she always wanted.

It had been a week since their Lake of the Ozarks vacation, and she had been giving Trenton the icy shoulder. Ignoring him as much as she could while she thought things through. She busied herself with work and her grad classes, coming up with excuse after excuse

"So are you going to tell me what's wrong? Did I do something?" Trenton walked into her office and closed the door, even after she told him she was busy all day working on a report.

She did not know how to break his heart.

"Ever since we got back from The Ozarks, you've been this way...never want to spend time with me."

She looked up from her laptop, took off her glasses, and tried to form the words to say what she had to say.

Trenton placed his hands on her desk and leaned closer to her. "Babe, we're good, right?"

"I don't know if things are working out. With us." There, she said it and maybe she could make it easy by ripping the band-aid off with no pain.

She tried to read the emotion on Trenton's face, but it was hard to read. He did not even move, just kept his focus on her face.

"Trenton-"

"Richard, right?"

"It's not like that. I just think-"

"Don't bullshit me! I've been trying to make you my world because of how I feel about you but it's always felt like it's not enough. Because I will never be enough. Not when you compare me to Richie Rich."

"What do you want me to say?"

"I thought you were better than that Sharynn." He stood back from the desk. "I love you. But I guess that is not enough for you."

He turned, walked away and opened her door then left.

She did not know how to feel.

Or if this was what she really wanted.

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