Okay I've been gone conducting studies. Running experiments. Testing on innocent animals. Testing on myself. After all this scientific research, I have come to a revolutionary scientific conclusion.

Not just Mina. Not just Padparadscha. Not just Majin Buu. Not even Whitney and her god damned miltanks. Not Virgo. For fucks sake not even Kofuku, the greatest character in Noragami. All pink girls are perfect.

Perfect BESIDES MEI HATSUME HOT DAMN SHES PERFECT

Look at that FUCKING smile. She's FUCKING smart too she's no dumbass.

THOSE GOGGLES MUWAH! MWAH! TAKE MY MONEY NOW MEI.

IM GLAD THE DAY HAD COME THAT WE CAN ALL REJOICE, THE TRUE BEST PINK GIRL HAS BEEN SELECTED AFTER YEARS OF RESEARCH AND HARDSHIP. EVERYONE GIVE HATSUME A HAND!

I now present Mei with the certified Nobel Pink Prize. You have won. All of your worthy opponents fought hard, but clearly not as hard as you! What do you have to say?!

Doesn't even take a break from working gents! Nothing to say! Too busy making the word a better place! ONE FINAL ROUND OF APPLAUSE EVERYBODY.

OH LOOK WINNER OF THE CINNAMON ROLL GIRL CONTEST IS APPLAUDING HER

OCHACO URARAKA EVERYBODY!
ONE FINAL HAND EVERYONE!

TO ALL OF THE PEOPLE WHO COULDN'T MAKE IT TONIGHT, WHO WON MS. HATSUME?