- Evangeline -

I'm picking my way across the debris of my mind castle. With my index, I bend over and tap a rock. It rings hollow. I lift my head up and sigh.

I push myself in an upright position and shake my thoughts away. There is no use wallowing in my own despair. No, I don't want to go back to the Castle in Epoh. I really, really don't want to go back. But yes, it's what is best for them - for us. It's what's best for the rebels, and it's what's best for Methron. I have a duty. I have to do it.

Knock knock knock !

Even the sound itself is happy. I pass my fingers in my hair and pull back. I really don't want to see her right now.

I took too long to answer, so she opens the door.

"Hiya, Eva- What's wrong ?"

"Nothing," I reply hurriedly, letting my arms drop. "Nothing."

"Sure ? Yah don't seem that good."

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I smile, and she lets the subject go. I don't want to talk about it with her, and besides, I'm not even sure I can tell her. The mood at the meeting earlier seemed secretive. About the meeting... Why would Dæor push me away like that ? Wait, no - why am I so surprised ? He can have his privacy. Just like I need mine.

"Aline, do you mind getting dinner for me ? I'm still not allowed to go into the dining room."

"Yah know yer allowed. Yah just not... Encouraged."

"Same difference," I toss as I fall back on the bed, one arm crossed over my eyes. "Please ?"

"Yeah, no problem," she answers. I hear her footsteps. She's walking away, and pauses before closing the door. She's gone.

I roll over to my side. I feel so tired.

*****

Sheso, I feel so much better. My eyes are recovering - I can see again. Well then again, it has been a week since the rebels beat me up.

I slide my feet across my bed and lift myself up. Delicately, I lift my shirt and prob the bruises carpeting my side. Immediately, my fingers snap back and I softly tut. Not a good idea.

Dropping my shirt, I move over to the ring of coal in the corner of my room. My makeshift fireplace. I had to beg for this one.

The fire is blazing, and I pause for a few seconds, just sticking my hands out and reveling in the heat. It feels nice. But I have things to do.

I drop a brick in the fire and get up slowly. I still have a few bruises on my legs, but they're healing much faster than the ones on my side. I walk over to the chair leaning against the wall, before gathering my clothes and layering them on.

If I'm being honest, I haven't done much these past few days. I couldn't. Keiti, Gail and the others haven't yet decided what to do. On one hand, I need to be trained to be prepared once I'm in the Castle. But on the other hand, they need to be careful with regards to the other rebels. So, since I've spent the last week doing pretty much nothing, I have constantly needed to remind myself that I am a rebel. A full-time, certified, real member. I use little things, like these clothes. For the first time in years, I'm not wearing white. I pull on my bright red shirt and smile. It feels incredibly good. I also wear pants. Pants ! On a woman ! The King would recoil in horror. But boy, are they comfortable... The brick should be warm by now. I move over to the fire and grab it. Ouch ! It jumps around in my hands for a few moments until I'm able to wrap it in a band of cloth. I press it against my bruises - not too hard - and lean back on my bed.

Knock knock knock !

"Come in, Aline !" I exclaim with a smile on my face.

"Good mornin' ", Evangeline," she trumpets as she strides in. "I got great news !"

"Go ahead," I prompt as I tap a place next to me on the cot. Gladly, she sits down and starts to explain: "I meet with Keiti to talk 'bout yah 'nd how yah'ld train. They think yah can begin now, that things are calmed down now that those," she pauses, "bastards got what they deserved. 'nd I told 'er yer wounds are better, like yah told me. So yer starting today !"

I blink. Oh. I wasn't expecting that.

"I'm gonna bring yah tah the training room 'nd yer gonna try out a few weapons. Don't worry, there'll barely be nobody there - ain't gonna be like last time. They're all in a meeting 'bout our next attack."

I raise my eyebrows. "What attack ?"

"Dunno, I ain't at the meeting. Duh."

A real weapon... Real training... And real attacks. I suddenly sort of feel excited.

"Back to yer session thing, we're all pretty much asked to have basic knowledge of weapons here, but everyone has a favorite, one they're better at and train with more."

"What's yours ?"

She smiles. "Daggers," she answers, a twinkle in her eye. "It's the best."

I laugh. "We'll see about that."

*****

She lets my elbow go and points to the rack. "Here are yer options," she explains. There are so many different weapons: a bow, a couple of daggers, a sword, a crossbow, a mace, an axe... "A scythe ?"

"Yeah, don't ask," she shrugs. "Don't even know who uses that one. So, what tempts yah ?"

I bite my lip. "I... don't know," I confess. "Too many choices." She chuckles. "Yeah... But yah'll know when it's the one. You'll feel it," she finishes, wiggling her eyebrows. It's my turn to chuckle as I turn back to the rack. I let my hand float above the selection and close my eyes. I really don't know which to pick... Abruptly, I lunge for one. My hand closes around a hilt and I open my eyes. The axe. I turn around to Aline and she shrugs again. "Go fer it," she suggests. "Yah might as well."

Alright, then. I bend over and grab the hilt with both hands. I painfully lift the axe off the rack, and hold it awkwardly, my two arms extended and the blade only a couple of centimeters away from the ground. "What do I do know ?"

"Swing it," she offers.

Gritting my teeth, I twist my hip sideways whilst starting to move my arms back and forth, like a pendulum. Once I've gained enough momentum, I grind my back heel in the mat under my feet and swing the axe in a big turn around my body. But I underestimated the weight of the weapon and things quickly get out of hand. Instead of controlling it, it directs me. I spin around like a top before the axe escapes my hand and plants itself firmly in the mat. Dizzy, I trip over my own left foot and collapse on the floor. Stunned silence in the room.

The first thing I hear is Aline's hysterical laugh. She's bent in half, hiding her tears and holding her stomach. With mock arrogance, I get up and brush my hair away from my face. "Right," I voice. "Mock me." The display only makes her laugh harder, and I have to crack a smile. I turn around towards the axe, ready to try to pull it out, but someone has already done so.

His broad back is to me. Square shoulders, black hair already graying... My heart drops. I know who this is.

"Oh, Liam ! Thanks for getting that for us," Aline gratefully tells him, climbing back up to her feet behind me.

General Liam Olmund.

"No problem," he answers, smiling, and then his gaze turns to me. A chill goes through my bones. "Princess," he nods. "Would you like your axe back ?" With one hand, he holds it out to me. Almost immediately, Aline interposes herself between us to and chuckles: "I think I'll take that, thanks." She places the weapon back on the rack, and I purposefully look at her do it. I can't bear to look in his direction. All the more because I know his eyes are locked on me.

I know he defended me at the debate, I know. I also know that if he does anything to harm me, the rebels will protect me. I know that I'm safe.

But I don't feel safe as long as I'm anywhere near him.

He finally clears his throat and moves away from me. I breathe an inner sigh of relief. "Princess," he throws over his shoulder, bent over the rack. "I think you'll need a lighter weapon, at least to begin with." He brushes the different weapons with his fingertip before closing his hand on one. "Here, try this." He's handing a sword to me.

For a moment, I balk and mildly panic. How can I grab the sword and not touch his hand ? At my hesitation, he backtracks and places the sword back on the rack. "Or, if you prefer, you could use these daggers-"

"The sword is good, thank you," I lunge forwards and grab the hilt of the weapon before he has the opportunity to hand it back to me. I back up and turn my back to him. Out of sight, out of mind. I sigh. Now I can focus. I glance over at Aline and she nods. "Do what yah feel like doin' ", she advises. Leaning back against the side of the cave, she nods to me. The message is clear: the floor is all yours, Evangeline.

I take a deep breath. It's quite awkward, standing here. I both don't know what to do and need to think carefully about it. I don't want to ridicule myself, that's for sure. Lifting up the sword, I inspect it. My sudden movement causes the blade to catch the torchlight, and I find myself mesmerized by it. Abruptly, I forget the others in the room. I adjust my grip, and let the sword swoop down and back up. Closing my eyes, I try to remember. I haven't seen many people actually wield swords in my life. But I did last week - in this training room, before they punched the living daylights out of me. I need to remember what they did... With sudden determination, my eyes snap open and I lunge forwards. Fending off an imaginary attacker, I twist my hips and turn, attacking my opponent from the right. But oh ! he defends himself, blocking my blade. I do a circular movement with my wrist and twist his blade around. He is momentarily surprised, but knocks my blade away again. Darn; he's experienced. He shifts forwards, but I bend backwards and end up half on the floor in a bridge-like position with one arm propping me up. Using the flat of my blade, I smack my sword against his calf. The shock makes him trip and I use the opportunity to push myself back up. Extending my arm, I point my blade at the base of his throat. "Checkmate," I murmur.

Applause pulls me out of my reverie, and the opponent before me dissolves to mist. Aline springs towards me. "That was amazin' ! Yer awesome !"

I feel my cheeks go rosy. "Thanks," I mumble.

"Yer freaking incredible ! Repeat it !" She takes my two shoulders and shakes. My head rolls back and forth. "Say it !"

"Alright," I relent with a grin. "I'm freaking incredible."