"Lupin? Hey, Remus, you okay?"

He was not being held down anymore, that was the important part. He was sitting up and rubbing at his face and threw himself into his arms barely before he even knew it, and only realized after a few awkward pats he was hugging Regulus he was so deliriously happy to be free.

Regulus was fighting every instinctive urge to curse this weirdo off of him as he looked desperately around the blank stone passage. It was narrow, deserted, filthy with grime, dust and cobwebs, no windows in sight, and had a spiral stone staircase at either end. No way they were at Hogwarts. "Um, Remus?"

"Sorry," his brother's boyfriend whispered, sort of released him, and just fell to the floor, still gasping in air. He yelped and tried to jump back, no clue if it was a full moon or what to do here! Remus still had a trembling hand hooked onto his shirt and the other was red even in the faint light, but he kept rubbing at his face with it anyways.

He wasn't changing though, he'd watched that enough times to be positive he shouldn't be full blown running and screaming for help at least, so he went back to sort of awkwardly patting him on the shoulder and offered, "should I, um, go?" He wanted to go find Sirius, but last he saw they hadn't seemed to be on the best of terms and he didn't want to make this worse.

"No," his hand tightened in his shirt and he swallowed uncomfortably, but his breathing was finally evening out and he was looking more properly around now, he even went to inspect his other hand in his own mild surprise. "Please, just, give me a second."

"Okay," he said lamely, half his mind cringing at the look Mother would give him if she saw a werewolf sprawled on his feet and what she'd tell him to do about that, the rest of him trying to figure out how he'd gotten stuck with Sirius' two friends back to back and couldn't work up the nerve to say anything to either of them. It's not them he really wanted to ask this of anyways, not even Peter could answer.

As if mercifully summoned from the shadows, a black dog came galloping around the corner like a death omen, but both smiled in relief to see Padfoot switch back.

"Moony!" He stumbled on the uneven floor and collapsed beside him, reaching for him automatically. "Hey, it's okay, you're out, just let it out Remus."

Regulus found himself finally released, and with even less of an inclination to leave as Remus curled up against Sirius. His brother kept making soft gentle noises he'd never heard in his life, took the oddly injured hand in both of his and murmured a soft apology and finally when it was clear Remus was calm, there was a sweetness in his teasing voice that sounded foreign to him but was so familiar by now for the way he usually talked to and about his friends. "I'm gone for five seconds and you're hooking up with my brother? The scandal!"

Remus buried his face farther into Sirius' chest and muttered something that made his brother smile, but then look up at him and it was all gone. He just looked, sad. He opened his mouth, stopped and looked back down at his boyfriend, and then back at him and mouthed, 'sorry.'

He didn't know what he was sorry for, and he didn't really expect an answer right now. Instead he uneasily cleared his throat and asked, "should I, um, go find, James?"

Remus was finally sitting up and looking around properly for the first time, taking in the awkward air, but Padfoot spoke firmly first, "not alone, just give me five seconds. We need to go find the others." Then Sirius turned back to him still just holding him gently in place, "Moony?"

"I'm good," he lied, trying to force his feet back into some semblance of working order. Sirius had already bounded back upright and was trying to support his weight before he got the first muscle in his leg to work. "I'll run the length of Hogwarts right now, fit as a fiddle."

"What's a fiddle have to do with this?" Sirius laughed lightly but didn't call him out, instead glanced down at their clasped hands and guiltily tried to pull back now. Remus just held on tighter and made sure he wasn't using the wall for support as he started walking. Sirius sighed in relief and gave Regulus a little nudge to get him moving as well, before getting in front of both of them and leading the way up the stairs.

"Where do you think we are?" Padfoot asked like this was a morning stroll, even as they found themselves out in open air that had such chilly and powerful wind about it twisted up his hair, clothes, and words at once.

Remus pressed himself in closer, watching the flickering darkness for anything else that shouldn't be moving while Regulus trailed carefully close by eyeing the sheer drop to blackness below. The castle was crumbling before their eyes, even as they watched more pebbles began trickling away.

They rounded the next corner and found a lone cell waiting. The bars were rusted, it was still locked with nobody else around. The golden book sat inside.

"Well this just gets creepier by the second," Sirius groaned.

"I vote we don't open that yet," Regulus offered.

"Seconded," Moony agreed and he squeezed Sirius' hand like he really thought he was mad enough to do that without the others around yet.

He was tempted to at least open the door just to prove the two were freaking out over nothing, he wouldn't grab the book yet, but reconsidered it as a bad idea just as Lily, Alice, and Frank came around the same bend and sighed in relief.

"You're alive!" Lily in particular looked oddly thrilled to see them, and she was just acting bizarre lately.

"Uhhu," he confirmed. "Seen the others?"

"Yes," she rolled her eyes, "we saw them and just walked right past."

Sirius grinned and would have happily returned the sarcasm, but James and Peter came around the corner only a few moments later whispering to each other.

"Everyone's alive!" Sirius mock cheered. "Let's get this show on the road and out of this place!" He turned without further ado and used reducto to blast open the door. Obviously this was the best course of action, if there was some booby trap he was activating it from a safe distance.

The door swung open with a bang and covered them all in dust while Sirius smirked nobody had died and went forward, making a grand show of grabbing the book and finally dropping Remus's hand.

He looked up in triumph to see Moony was not laughing along. James at least was fighting back a smile while the others just looked like they'd call him an idiot themselves if they weren't still sniffling. He huffed and decided against putting this off, instead thrusting the book towards Lily and asking in general, "any clue where we are? I think I'm going to go find out."

"We're in Nurmengard, there was a-"

James watched him ignore Frank answering and grabbed Remus, pulling him back out of sight. "I get the feeling they weren't done talking," he said into the awkward silence. He wished he could follow them and had no clue how long he was supposed to stay out of it. They hadn't said he couldn't come this time... He took an uneasy step and watched Peter, who was sitting down with his head in his hands. He and Regulus were talking quietly to each other, so at least he wasn't going to pass out from exhaustion for what he'd done. Lily was reading the chapter title. The Theif. The lone prisoner that Nurmengaurd housed was Grindelwald, some long ago History of Magic class bubbled to the surface, what had he ever stolen?

She seemed okay, or she was just being her usual stubborn self and pretending she was. Nobody had any chocolate to offer and she seemed like she wasn't going to pass out as she read the first sentence. He took another uneasy step and hesitated again.

Sirius released his arm back at the first descending staircase, right on the edge of inside once more but pressing in close so that nobody but the wind could hear. "Look, I know I can be a dick," and Remus had to bite his lip hard to stop a smile, "and I'm sorry."

"Me too," he couldn't stop a sad smile now as Sirius took his hand again, rubbing his thumb gently where it had stayed on the chair.

"You're sorry I'm a dick, or you're sorry you can be a dick too," he clarified with his own smirk.

"Both," he sighed, watching him in complete fascination. "I don't know what's wrong with me." He felt constantly on edge lately and for some inexplicable reason getting Sirius' undivided attention without a single misunderstanding between them was somehow making it worse. Padfoot holding him to his side and worrying about him should have been the best comfort in the world for as awful as he'd been feeling at that moment.

Sirius was concentrating very hard on their hands now, brow furrowed as he kept at the gentle motion. "Natural reflex I suppose, I imagine you did something similar to Tonks when she pushed into you before that hospital wing mess. I shouldn't have grabbed you like that, and you snapping was natural. You lashed out Remus, but I know you. My ears still ring sometimes from the thrashing you gave us when you found out about our Animagus, but you can't stop me from caring."

"You know I don't think you're stupid," Remus made sure he heard that in the torrent of wind. "I, that was a shitty thing to say, I don't even know why it came out."

Sirius did not impulsively answer, still staring at their hands, and that scared him more than what he'd just been strapped down to. When he did, it was still in an extremely casual way. "People do awful shit when they're pisssed, I know that better than anyone," he finally shrugged. "It usually comes out because you have thought it, at one time or another."

"I think you're an idiot five times a day," Remus smiled and teased and Sirius finally smiled and looked back again. He knew he should say something about their apparently broken deal, but had no clue where to start. He still felt immensely guilty, would he ever stop being inhumane to Padfoot? "Probably best I get used to the stupid thing though," he whispered before he could stop himself, he was definitely the one who deserved a way to keep his trap shut lately.

Sirius froze, and Remus realized he'd let himself relax a little too much.

"Shit, never mind, don't worry-" he tried, but Sirius had already pulled back and did not look happy at him as he held his face. His hands were warm even in the blistering cold, he fought off the urge to bury his face in his neck.

"No, no, what the hell did that mean?" The fire he'd promised in retribution burned in his throat.

"Just," Remus looked miserably away, Sirius released him but his hands hovered by his shoulders. He didn't think it would hurt this bad to say it out loud, the ease he'd forced himself to acquire in the suffocating feeling as a solution finally came to him. "Just in case."

Padfoot looked livid. At him. He let his hands fall to his side and even took a precautionary step back. Remus couldn't meet his eyes anymore as he pressed himself against the low wall, felt another few bricks slide loose. He'd never been afraid of Sirius even at his worst tempers, and somehow Sirius still returned that in kind on him? "Better safe than sorry."

"You, you can't be thinking like that," Sirius' voice was icier than the air. "The hell's the matter with you, you aren't going to do anything to me or anyone!"

"We don't know though," Remus couldn't imagine any higher hurdle to him than the unknown now, not after what he'd done and would do. "That, that baby in Tonks has probably already killed her if it doesn't come out some horrible hybrid thing when it does, and who knows what else I'm capable of-"

"Stop, just stop!" Siris finally snapped. "I said I'd listen and I did! That's not going to happen, you've never hurt anyone! Why can't you trust yourself, like I do?"

Remus still couldn't look at him. Never hurt anyone? He'd been hurting his friends for ages during full moons even before they were trapped in this endless vicious cycle of having to pin him down just to survive! He'd been escalating without either of them noticing on marking his territory on Sirius! At least now his boyfriend had to know and hear how much more dangerous he could still get, really consider everything, right? 'And do what?' the traitorous thought still lingered. As if you'd ever leave him for his own good, you're too pathetic to even entertain the thought.

Sirius slowly edged back to him and gently touched his face, waiting for Moony to look at him before kissing him with so much desperation he didn't know if he'd ever stop. Remus kissed him back, Moony barely stopped for breath and met him beat for beat. He just didn't know how else to get through to him, he wasn't afraid of him and he never would be, if he kept repeating himself he'd get it through to his boyfriend. He pulled back first though and said with quiet ferocity, "I need to speak to James. We're not done with this."

Moony stroked his hair for a few moments before finally nodding and not saying another word, still looking down at the drop in a way that terrified him. Sirius gave him one last peck before he went in search of backup.

Prongs, mercifully, was already halfway there to meet him just like always, looking hesitantly ahead and back before shuffling another awkward step along. It would have been hilarious if he didn't feel like hitting him.

"The hell did you two get up to there?" James smiled as he rushed forward and laughed. He finally lost his temper again, and even James couldn't stop the torrent of words pouring out.

"He was strapped down by your new favorite department with a muzzle in place! You know, the Control for Creatures Division he's now got in his head you'll drag his ass to if he so much as pinches me!"

The smile plunged away, he actually took a step back. "I'd never actually do it," he seemed offended he'd believed otherwise. "Break his jaw if he cheats on you sure, but I'd do the same thing to you! It makes him feel better," he added with his own scowl now, but still determinedly calm.

"You're not helping when you say shit like that James!" Sirius insisted. "He's never going to stop thinking of himself like that if you encourage him with empty threats!"

James insisted imploringly, "I love Remus too, you know that, but most werewolves don't hang around so many other people their whole lives. There could be, different obstacles he deals with. He'll be more careful about you so long as he keeps thinking about it like that, why is that beyond you!"

"I'm not saying we shouldn't look into it!" Sirius thundered back. "I'm saying stop bloody letting him not face this! He won't ever stop thinking of himself as some monster if you can't believe it first!"

"I don't," James snapped, shoving him in frustration, there was a crack and the floor dropped a chunk of walkway out from right underneath. Neither noticed. "Just because I'm not shagging him doesn't mean I don't care!"

"That's not the point!" Sirius howled, only his long time in this messed up space kept his temper in check from hitting him back, only because it was James held his wand from being drawn. "You take it back James, and you don't say it again!"

"Not so long as he needs it," James snapped, almost patronizing.

Sirius snarled like an animal and stocked off before he did something he'd regret.

He stormed past Remus and went barreling down the stairs, listening to the book in a desperate kind of anger. Ron was injured, Grimmwauld place was no longer secure, the trio were now more alone than ever, but they'd done it. They'd gotten the locket, they were one step closer to defeating Voldemort.

Pacing in the stairwell was only making it worse, he kept seeing Remus just hovering there on the edge, not going towards the others or to him. He didn't know or care what James was doing right now. He found himself laughing sporadically when he heard Hermione had packed tea but no food, forcing them to forage and cringed as the noise echoed back.

The reason for them even being here made no more sense, Voldemort had found Gregorovitch but someone had stolen whatever Voldemort wanted. Grindelwald? If there were more Horcruxes here it was a weird connection, but then, Harry's life was full of those. The others were probably up there puzzling it out as well. He knew he should go back, it's not as if this was making him feel any better, but he felt useless and frustrated and was pretty sure he'd just deck Peter on sight right now. So he stayed away, and kept pacing, and even began humming to himself one of their favorite songs, and tried to work past that into something tangible he could actually say to Moony or Prongs instead of just yelling like a brainless oaf.