6: lace is sexy

FAITH

I woke up alone in my room, thank goodness. I was actually afraid to wake up with a stranger inside my room, probably watching me sleep with that dark piercing eyes or rummaging my things and throw snide comments about my stuff.

But my room just felt the same. There were no signs of that drop-dead gorgeous but creepy stranger who just appeared inside my room and tried to kill me twice.

Gaya ng madalas kong ginagawa kapag nagigising ako, una kong tinitingnan ang dingding kung saan nakadikit lahat ng larawan namin ni Jack.

Surprisingly today, staring at it doesn’t feel the same anymore.

Dati ay namomotivate ako sa araw-araw kapag nakikita iyon. Now it just brings so much pain.

Bumangon ako at isa-isang tinanggal ang mga larawan na nakakidikit. One photo was during the acquaintance party when I was a freshman. He was my escort nang panahon na iyon at parehas kaming nakangiti sa larawan. I can recall what happened that night. Sumayaw kami sa mahinang tugtog at nakangiti sa isa’t-isa.

Binuksan ko ang drawer at naglabas ng maliit na garbage bag. I don't have the luxury of time to pull out each photo and recall every memory. Mas lalo lamang sasama ang kalooban ko kapag ginawa iyon.

Inaamin kong mahal ko pa rin si Jack, but I love my morals more. He has a family at may anak sila. Ayaw kong maranasan ng anak niya ang masalimuot na pagsasama ng kanyang magulang. As much as I want to keep Jack to myself, hindi ko iyon magagawa.

I know he would chose his family after all.

Apparently, I was just a side chick...  For few years, how stupid of me.

But no time to scold myself over it, I have to pack and get things ready. I’ll drop by some clinic, pick a schedule with a shrink then move my things back to the dormitory. In few days, the second semester of my junior year in college will start and there’s no time to slack off.

I packed my usual things, making sure my essentials are inside my luggage. Pagkatapos mag-empake ay naligo ako at naghanda. After blow drying my hair, nakarinig ako ng mga katok.

“Faith? Anak?”

I put down the comb and opened the door. “Mommy.”

She looked around the room at ngumiti nang makitang nakahanda na ang mga dadalhin ko. Her eyes were sadder today, for surely some reason. Humakbang siya palapit sa akin at niyakap ako.

“Okay ka lang My?” nagtatakang tanong ko sa kanya.

She pulled away and smiled. “Nanay mo ako kaya kung may problema, do not hesitate to tell me okay?”

I knew it. Alam niya ang nangyari sa relasyon ko kay Jack. She must be as shocked as I am, after all, nakilala ko si Jack dahil sa kanya. Jack’s mother was my mom’s client before regarding some legal stuff about inheritance.

My mom’s a lawyer who lost her husband due to some accident four years ago. I know mom had moved on but the impact of my dad’s death may still be affecting her in some aspect. Sa ngayon, mukhang medyo okay na siya. In fact she’s in a relationship with a prosecutor she met in one of her trials.

“Ayos lang ako my,” paninigurado ko sa kanya.

“I... I scheduled you for a psychotherapy,” sabi niya at hinawakan ang mga kamay ko. “Please don’t take it negatively Faith--”

She stopped when she saw me smile. “Thank you my.” Well, I guess she took the initiative to schedule me for a therapy. Hindi man niya sabihin, alam niya ang suicide attempt ko. Now that I looked back, I feel sorry for being so selfish to the point na naisip kong magpakamatay.

A therapy is what I needed the most for now. The impact of knowing I actually wreck a family had some effect on me. Plus I’m seeing an evil man inside my room who seemed to hurt me few time.

“Anong nangyari sa leeg mo?” tanong niya nang mapansin ang pasa ko.

I tried to hide it with my hair. “Wala my--”

“Faith, did you try to hang yourself?” she asked, worried dawning her face.

Maybe I did.

I don’t know.

Maybe I got this when I went to the bar to follow Jack.

Or when I tried to jumped down the high-rise building.

But what's clear in my mind is that I was choked, by... well... this inexistent man named Orion.

Siguro nga ay iba ang naging epekto sa akin nang mga nangyari. I’m seeing things and imagining weird people.

“Faith, sumagot ka--”

“Mommy, wag mo na lang pansinin ang pasa ko okay? Baka parating na ang menstrual cycle ko sa buwan na ‘to,” pagdadahilan ko. As far as I know, my period ended last week at malabong magkaroon ako ng pasa sa leeg.

Unless I was really choked... that I almost die.

Nag-aalalang napatingin pa rin sa akin si mommy sabay buntong-hininga. “I’ll drive you to the dormitory after we see your therapist, is that fine?”

I gave her a reassuring smile. “Sige po.”

*** 

Bago ako hinatid ni Mommy sa dormitory ay dumaan kami sa doktor. There was a sign on the door with the doctor’s name. Pagkapasok ko ay pinaupo niya ako sa couch na nasa harap niya. Nagpakilala siya bilang si Doctor Emily Montgomery. She started a light conversation at hindi ko alam kung ano ang meron sa kanya at mgaan ang loob ko.

Maybe that’s what doctors like her do best.

I opened up about what happened to my relationship with Jack, my suicidal attempts and hallucinations. She tried to ask more about the hallucinations so I tried to recall as much as I can remember about Orion.

She didn’t judged me when I gave her a name. She just tried to figure out the things I couldn’t grasp. She did it without a hint of sarcasm or anything. I can feel she really wanted to help me.

Natapos ang session namin na may ngiti. They have this ability to make you feel comfortable with them. She scheduled me another session and I’m more than willing to go.

Paglabas ko ay naroon pa rin si Mommy. Agad siyang tumayo at sinalubong ako. “How’s your session?”

“Okay naman po My--” I almost dropped my scarf when I saw the man with that toothy grin.

Orion.

He leaned on the glass, sa labas ng clinic at kumakaway pa sa akin. I have to shake my head few times and see if he’s just really my hallucination but he was still there, probably judging me that I certainly looked stupid.

Napasinghap ako at sinubukang ifocus ang atensyon kay mommy. “I’m scheduled for another session my.”

“Good to know, gusto mo bang samahan pa rin kita?” she got her things and walked towards the car park.

“Hindi na po,” sagot ko sa kanya. “My second session is probably on the first week of my class. Hahanap na lang ako ng vacant sched ko para pumunta rito.”

We walked towards the car. I tried to ignore Orion who’s still following me with his gaze. He was still standing outside the clinic, leaning on the glass with his hands on his pocket. Nagtuloy-tuloy lamang ako sa sasakyan, chanting to myself sooner or later, I won’t have hallucinations of him.

Nang makaupo ako sa shotgun seat ay saka ako nakahinga nang maluwag. More sessions and I’ll be over it, I thought. Umikot sa kabilang bahagi ng sasakyan si Mommy and asked the guard to help her leave the parking area.

Tinanaw ko siya na kausap ang gwardiya nang may kumatok sa bintana sa gilid ko. I almost jumped in my seat when I saw Orion.

He looks different today.

He’s in coat and tie, unlike the previous hallucinations I had. He wore casual clothes unlike the formal ones today. If he’s real, I would have thought he’s some big company CEO who went out after his lunch meeting.

Ilang beses akong kumurap at mas lalo naman siyang ngumisi sa akin. He signaled me to roll down the windows pero mas lalo akong nanigas sa kinauupuan ko. 

Oh, what’s taking mom so long?

At muntik na akong mapasigaw nang kusang bumaba ang bintana and Orion’s head leaned closer.

“Where are you heading angel?” he asked, looking at the backseat kung nasaan ang ilang mga gamit ko. My other luggage was in the compartment but he still figured out I’m going somewhere with that little bags back there.

Unless, the car’s compartment is transparent and he can see through.

Napasinghap lamang ako at kinalma ang sarili ko.

“Lost your tongue angel?” tanong niya.

Tiningnan ko siya nang masama and this man had the audacity to wriggle his brow! His playful attitude is what I hated the most. I’m shaking in fear and I’m losing my head but he would just grin and wriggle his brows?

And why is he blessed with the best brows for a man? Maybe I have to blame my hallucinating mind for that. Maybe I couldn’t settle for less so I formed an extremely attractive man.

My mom didn’t see him, ako lamang ang nakakakita sa kanya. And he’s back to bothering me again. Why did I allow my mind to do so gayong kagagaling ko lamang sa unang session?

Maybe that’s part of the healing process.

“Any problems Angel?” tanong niya.

“Go away Orion.”

He pouted. What? Why does a pout seemed so good to him although it contradicts what he seems to be. Man was brutish, I could tell. He also seem to be the type who had a ad temper, the sort of a bratty kid who would throw a tantrum anytime he wants.

And he’s extremely dangerous or so it seems.

Saka lamang ako tila nakahinga nang maluwag nang bumalik si Mommy at naupo sa harap ng manibela. “Put your seat belt on Faith--” her gazed suddenly passed me, and looked straight at the window. “Oh, hello. What can I do for you?”

Napakurap ako nang ilang beses. Si Orion ba ang kausap ni mommy? With a cheeky grin, Orion went to the other side of the car.

She can now see him too?!

"Hello madame! Are you Faith's mom?" tanong ni Orion. Well, he got my mom with his single smile.

Yes, he is definitely charming.

"Hello, I'm Rosalie Del Valle. Kaibigan ka ba ng anak ko?" tanong ni mommy at pinasadahan ng tingin si Orion.

She can definitely see him!

Pero bakit hindi niya ito nakita sa kwarto ko?

"Yup! Angel and I are friends," he replied emphasizing the last word. "Going somewhere?"

"Yes, ihahatid ko siya sa dorm niya. Classes will resume in a week," sagot ni mommy. She sounded friedly with him, unlike the others. Kapag may mga nakikilala si mommy ay medyo cautious siya sa simula. Siguro ay bahagi na iyon ng pagiging abogada niya.

But with Orion she seemed so comfortable.

"What a coincidence! I'm heading to my dormitory too— which happens to be where Angel's dorm is," sagot niya. He shoot another sharp tooth grin. "Can I get a lift?"

I said no the same time mom said yes. Sabay silang napatingin sa akin. Hanggang ngayon ay naguguluhan pa rin ako. So he's not my hallucination? He's real and he's...

... He's right inside the car now, comfortably sitting on the backseat.

During the drive towards the dormitory, I can feel his gaze piercing through my back. Ilang beses na ring nagtama ang tingin namin sa rearview mirror. Hindi ako comfortable sa kabuoan ng biyahe.

On the other hand, mom was so entertained. Ilang beses na siyang natawa sa mga sinasabi ni Orion. O have to remind her over and over sa tuwing naka-go signal na ang traffic light dahil masyado siyang naaliw sa kausap.

I was silent the whole trip hanggang sa marating namin ang dormitory. Mom received a call kaya hindi na niya ako natulungang mag-ayos ng kwarto. She left immediately to meet a client.

Ngayong kami na lamang ni Orion ang naiwan ay medyo naasiwa ako. He grinned, like always.

"I thought you're hiding."

I blinked at him. "Hiding? Kanino?"

"I don't know. Why were you with a shrink?" tanong ulit niya.

I pulled my luggage abmnd enter the dormitory. Kinuha naman niya ang pinakamalaking maleta at nagkusang hilahin iyon papasok.

"To get rid of you," sagot ko.

"That's mean, why do you want to get rid of me? You should feel honored. Not everyday I enjoyed the company of humans. Most of the time, I do things that can spread my empire, or I'll go pissed off my father—"

"Labas na ako sa problema mo sa daddy mo—"

"Not the literal daddy issues you have in mind. It's just that my dad's a dick."

I tried to ignore him but he really got daddy issues. Nang magsimula siyang magkwento tungkol doon, hindi na siya tumigil pa.

"You know, if they find a new favorite, wala. Ekis ka na— what?" he narrowed his eyes at me when I tried to grab the luggage he held.

"This is my room, thank you for walking me here."

"So?" he arched a brow.

"You're not allowed—"

He grabbed the keys from me and slid on the doorknob, successfully opening it. Nauna pa siyang pumasok sa loob kaysa sa akin. He threw my luggage on the dusty bed and looked around.

"Oh come on! Even here, your room is boring? I've seen your collection of underwear angel, they're sexy but your room isn't."

He what?!

"You ran through ny underwear?!"

He nodded fast. "Yup, nice set. By the way, lace is so sexy."

This... This man! He's unbelievable!

He suddenly pulled something from the back pocket of his pants. My... My tiny black lace panty!

I am going to kill him!!!

#

ShinichiLaaaabs✒️