Chapter 38 - Goodnight Beatrice

— Tris

Feeling the familiar feeling of a cold, hard surface as I wake, I wonder if I have started over.

I woke up like this once before. I recall. I was on the floor of a bunker after a group ganged up on me in a spar.

I hadn't remembered much after that moment, until again, I had woken up on a different cold hard floor, to find my mother in a cell next to mine.

I inhale, feeling my face as I exhale sharply, pain radiating in my body.

Struggling, I try to sit, my hands finding tiles on the walls.

My old cell didn't have tiles.

I sit, halfway upright, my head slumped on the tile wall. I focus on my breathing, by head barely keeping up with reality.

Each exhale I take could be understood as a groan, my leg feels as if it's on fire, and I feel my whole abdomen bruised.

My vision is fuzzed, but I see bars that keep me in.

The bars have a familiar feel.
The last time I looked at these bars, I was so skinny I was almost positive that if I could stand I could slip through them easily.

However, unlike last time, I am not bleeding out.

The bars are the only opening to the cell, compared to the latter where my mothers cell directly attached with open bars.

I miss my mother.

I sit leaning against the wall for what could be days, swaying in and out of consciousness. There is an IV going into my left arm with a clear liquid dripping into my arm.

I consider ripping it out, but I decide against it.

Hope that it's something helping you, Tris.

Helping you or killing you. The dark side of my mind remarks.

I still decide against ripping it out of my arm.

As I sit, vivid colors flash through my mind.

I remember so much.
Yet, nothing makes sense.

I remember learning to spar vividly: the cool metal in my fingers and the loud clanking of metal against metal in a duel.

I was good at it.
Real good.

The memory continues, spar after spar, success after success.

Then a memory begins of fighting an older man, probably in his late thirties.

I just know that he was an instructor, but I do not know a name.
Maybe I never knew his name. Maybe there is no name to remember..?

I'm good at sparing, but so is he.
Each attack he throws I block, and each attack I give he blocks.

Then suddenly I remember who he is.
He was in charge of the New York program.
I did not know his name, but he was brought in specifically to duel me; to see my strength and coordination in person.

The duel raged on for hours. I remember someone calling out that it had been three hours and another asking if they should stop us.

Both of us had a trait that no one else in this program had.

It was a trait that Dauntless initiation taught me.

How not to give up.

I purposely let down my guard, throwing an act I had began to plan in my head when someone called out five hours.

Getting in a tough hit to my ribs, I gasped.

Pain is temporary, Beatrice.

I knew that if I didn't kill him, his program would end up killing me.

Blinded by the thought that he might win, I allow him to gain another blow to the other side of my torso.

The crowd begins to gasp, knowing that I defeated each one of them until they were unconscious in a duel, they were glad at the idea that I may suffer and loose.

Everything was going as planned.

His shield was nonexistent.
And I took my opportunity.

I was short, he was tall.
He was much stronger than me.

The staff was not in fact pointed, but I had a feeling that with enough force I could obtain my goal.

I grip my pole tight and point it to the right side of his chest and using some form of momentum the pole goes through his chest.

The last thing I see is the pole entering his body in one place and exiting out of his upper back before I am tackled to the ground.

.

I wake with the sound of screaming and yelling. I hear glass smashing and people falling to the ground.

I know I'm not in a dream anymore.
This didn't happen in the past.
This is happening now.

They're breaking out of the prison.
I just know what's happening.

"Beatrice Prior!" Someone screams.

Suddenly a group of people are outside my opened cell door.

I'm numb, and all I do is look at them.

I know I should try to fight.
I also know I have no hope.

The first thing I feel is a slice.

I release a scream I don't recall as mine as a blade is pushed through my skin from my jawline to my chin.

My leg.
Please don't know about my leg.

Those are my only thoughts as a kick to my back causes my world to go dark.

+ + +

"You were tried not guilty as soon as the prison outbreak began. West was the only one who pressed charges on those fighting who were formally rescued from the building, and he was murdered immediately as the people from the prison gave up on you and sought out him. Most of them were killed in the process, the rest being shot after the murder," A Candor man stands near my bed.

"Where's Tobias?" My voice is weak.

"I'm sorry, I'm not sure who that is."

"Derrick? Please tell me he's dead."

"He suffered from a stroke before even making it to the prison. He had severe heart disease, and he was dying when he showed up. They tried to save him, so they could get information from a trial on him, but it was too late..." the man's voice fades as he continues to speak to me.

I fall asleep, unable to control my actions.
The last thought in my head being the knowledge that I am the only person left with knowledge of the New York Program.

I am the only person here to interrogate.

I am the only person with a reason not to be trusted.

.

When I awake again, my hand goes to my face before I open my eyes.

I feel a bandage where I know I was sliced, but a hand takes my hand as I open my eyes.

"Dad?" I recognize a man with dark hair and green eyes. He could possibly be my father, but I cannot see very well.

"It's me Beatrice." I know for sure it's him upon hearing his voice.

"Don't strain," I feel his hand on my shoulder, and I didn't even realize I was attempting to sit up until my back it's a mattress again.

"You're in Amity, you just got moved here from Candor two nights ago, and your mother and I just got here today. Tobias is in Erudite. He is okay."

"He's okay?" I feel as if I may be in peace serum, I'm not completely sure if I am smiling or not, for my face feels numb.

"He's okay, and so are you." I feel his hand on the side of my face push away a tear I didn't know was there.

"Why is my face numb?" I ask.

"They just stitched you up a few hours ago. You're probably still numb from the novocaine they numbed you with."

"My whole face?"

"I'm not sure honey," he chuckles a little. I see him smile.

I need to visit my parents more.
I've missed them.

"Did they find my leg?"

"Nope. They did an ultrasound and your tendonitis is gone too. You're probably sore from exertion though."

I smile.

Everything is fine.

"Hey Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Am I on peace serum?"

"Probably."

I don't answer for a second.

"And Tobias is okay?"

"Yes dear."

"He's in Erudite?"

"Yes, I talked to Cara on the phone, he is in good hands."

"And this is Amity?"

"Yes."

"And I'm high on peace serum?"

"You're proving it more and more by the second." I hear laughter in his voice as I feel my consciousness grow.

"Hey Dad?" I say quick.

"Yes Beatrice," he sings.

I sit up before asking , "Can I sit up?"

"Why is my stomach wrapped?"

"You had a bad bruise, and they were worried you were bleeding internally, however you weren't, they were shocked to understand. You have to have your stomach iced again in twenty minutes to reduce the swelling. That's my job, and I had just taken it off before you had woken up."

"Is it bad?" All my questions are quick and I don't control my words.

"Take a look."

I lift my shirt and see a towel over my stomach. I lift it up and see a dark purple mass from my hip to my bellybutton on my right side.

"Damn, that's bad."

"Watch your mouth please." He reprimands me knowing I'm not controlling what I'm saying.

I think he is humored.

"I'm sorry, but look at it!" I can't control my loud voice.

"Calm down honey," he shushes me.

"It's reallyyyy fucking damn purple Dad." My eyes don't leave my stomach and I don't recognize my voice.

"Okay honey. Watch what you say please."

"I'm sorry dad!"

"It's okay dear, just lower your voice."

"My face is numb."

"I know."

"Tobias is okay?" I ask out of the blue.

"Yes, he's fine."

"He's fine?"

"Yes. Tobias is okay."

"Hey Dad?"

"Yes."

"I'm going to sleep. Good night."

"Goodnight Beatrice."