PRESENT TIME

"Hey, I'm Zelena. I'm an addict." Zelena Lincoln stood in front of her NA group. Rue had just shared, but now it was her turn. Rue talked about how she met someone and how that someone had helped, and Zelena figured it was Jules. After what happened at Nate's party, she's been somewhat keeping her distance from Jules.

"Hi, Zelena." She heard the chorus of everyone speak.

"And I've been clean for 60 days." Zelena slightly lied. It's been 60 days since rehab, but she hasn't been clean the entire time. [i'm pretty sure euphoria has like big-time jumps we don't even notice bc 6 months went by between the first and last episode]

For the record, Zee and I weren't not... not telling the truth. We've both actually been doing very well. Because the morning after Zelena's date with Nate, she went to the hospital to check on Tyler, where he was still in a coma, and then she spent much more time with Nate. The other night, she and Nate threw a party at Nate's house; she got high and dozed off into a high sleep, which, when you fall asleep while high, it's a night of very, very deep sleep, and she basically disappeared for 16 hours, and Benjamin was not happy.

FLASHBACK

Nate Jacobs had just dropped Zelena Lincoln off at home after waking her up at around 5 am when he woke up to go to the bathroom. Zelena tried to make it back to her room quietly, but then the hall light came on, and Benjamin was standing in the hallway, and he was not happy.

"Where have you been?" He asked. Zelena stopped and turned around to face her brother.

"Sorry, my phone died." She lied.

"Bullshit. You're doing drugs." He said, and Zelena rolled her eyes. Whenever her brother accused her of doing drugs when in fact, she wasn't doing drugs, it made her want to do drugs to spite him.

"I'm not doing drugs." She responded calmly.

"Then where have you been? And why weren't you answering your phone? And why are you sneaking into the house." Benjamin asked, walking down the hallway towards his sister.

"A, I was with someone. B, I wasn't answering my phone because it died, as I said. And C, I was sneaking into the house, so I didn't wake you up. Can I go to bed now?" Zelena asked.

"Who were you with?" Benjamin asked.

"It does...-It doesn't matter, Benny," Zelena said.

"It matters, Zelena. It matters. You're doing drugs." Benjamin said, and then he took a deep breath, getting closer to Zelena until they were almost face to face. "I will not allow you to walk up into this house at 5:30 in the morning and lie to my face. So tell me the truth right now. Where were you?" Benjamin asked.

"Benjamin, I don't want to tell you everything that's going on in my life. If you want to drug test me, just drug test me." Zelena said, shrugging her shoulders. She wasn't in the mood to argue with her brother. She was pretty irritated from being woken up by Nate, and all she wanted to do was go back to bed. Benjamin considered her words.

And he did drug test her.

FLASH-FLASHBACK

But Benjamin wasn't the only one who was upset with Zelena.

Zelena Lincoln and Nate Jacobs lay in his bed after another party was thrown, and Nate saw Zelena getting high again. Her back was facing Nate, and his back was facing her because he was angry. Not at her, but her behavior. He hated watching her destroy herself and feeling helpless.

"I'm not kidding, Zee. I'm not trying to almost lose my best friend for the third time. I don't want to watch you fucking kill yourself." She heard Nate say, and when she heard his voice, she turned to face him, and his bare back was still towards her, and she frowned.

"I know, Nate... I'm not trying to kill myself." She whispered back.

"We've been through so much together, Zee... and the thing I'm scared of the most is losing you, and I just...-I can't like...-" Zelena cut Nate off by wrapping her arms around his torso and laying her head down on his back.

"...-I know. I get it. I get it." Zelena said, grabbing his hand, which Nate took and squeezed.

"I can't keep being around you if you don't stop using drugs, Zee. I can't...-I can't sit by and watch you destroy yourself; it hurts too much." Nate whispered, and Zelena frowned. She didn't want to give up drugs yet, but she also didn't want to give up Nate because he's been around a lot longer than the drugs.

She was at a crossroads.

"Okay..." She whispered.

"I mean it, Zee," Nate said.

"Okay, I promise... I'll stop. I just need you to do me a favor, again... and you're not gonna like it." Zelena whispered. She knew when she got home that Benjamin would drug test her.

"Are you fucking serious, Zelena... you need my pee again?" He asked, and she sighed.

"Last time, Nate... I promise." She whispered before kissing his shoulder. Nate sighed before letting Zelena's hand go. She watched as he picked up a nearby bottle and walked into the bathroom, but how she knew he was upset.

He shut the door with a hard slam.

FIRST FLASHBACK

Zelena finished emptying Nate's pee in the cup that Benjamin had given to her, and when she finished, she handed it to him, where he put it down on the counter and put the strips inside to test the pee. When Benjamin saw that the tests returned negative, he sighed, feeling a little bad that he was always accusing her of doing drugs, but he was still pissed.

"You're still grounded until I don't even fucking know," Benjamin said, walking out of the bathroom, and a few moments later, Zelena walked out after him.

"What else is there?" Zelena said as she went to her room. "Told you I wasn't lying," Zelena said before entering her room. She first reached into her pants and unstrapped the bottle from her leg before tossing it on the ground, and then she grabbed her phone and texted Nate.

zee 💍:
thanks for saving my ass like always
i love you

But Nate never responded.

PRESENT TIME

So, with Nate and Jules on our backs, we decided to stay clean, and we have been for a while. Not 60 days, but for a while. But we've also been coming to these meetings for longer. Hmm, I don't know. Zelena just didn't want to depress anyone. Plus, we really have been trying, and that counts for something.

"Two months ago, I woke up from a coma. I didn't know what happened, but from the looks of my older brother's face, I knew that... whatever it was, whatever I did... it wasn't good. It scared him. It really scared him. And, uh, at that moment, I decided to at least try and change because I owe it to him. I owe my brother everything. The hardest part, uh, has been... feeling like I owe it to myself. And, uh, maybe that'll get easier. I hope it will. Thank you." Zelena said, and as everyone clapped, she took her seat back next to Rue, and Rue grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

I was thankful to have a friend there with me. To have someone that I could trust. To have someone who understands what I'm going through and is going through it with me. An accountability partner? We just can't get dependent on each other. It's just been a really weird couple of weeks. Zelena noticed that while she and Nate were together, he was always on his phone. Same thing I noticed with Jules. They were on their phones all the time.

Like all of the time.

―

"I can't believe I haven't even told you how insane Benjamin is being," Zelena said, rolling her eyes as she and Nate walked to his truck hand-in-hand. He opened her door for her and started on the way back to her house. "All week long, he's just been going on and on... getting on me, visiting Tyler, I just think what happened with him is stressing him out." Zelena said.

Nate glanced over at her as his phone kept buzzing from the notifications that he was getting. He was talking to Jules on a gay dating site because it was a part of his plan that he was putting together, a plan that Zelena had no idea about.

"I just don't get why he's taking his stress out on me. I mean, I've been clean for a while now, you know that." Zelena said, and Nate nodded his head.

"Yeah. That's like, not cool for him to be all over your case like that. But like you said, maybe he's just stressed about Tyler still being in the hospital. What happened to him, by the way? I meant to ask when you asked me to drop you off there." Nate said.

"Oh... someone broke into his house and basically beat him to death, but we don't know who yet. He's starting to come back to consciousness but can't speak much." Zelena said, and then she heard Nate's phone continue to buzz; and she could hear it the whole time and was ignoring it, but now it was starting to irritate her.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Nate said.

"Yeah, it's whatever... but you know, if I tell Ben to get off my case because the more he accuses me of using, the more it makes me want to use just to spite him, that's going to turn into a big argument," Zelena said, and then she heard the buzzing again, and she sighed. "Who keeps texting you?"

"My dad." He said.

"Okay, well, do you want me to respond? He's texted you like 15 times, and your phone will not stop buzzing. It's irritating." Zelena said back, right as Nate's phone buzzed again.

"No, I'll just... call him later," Nate said, taking his phone out of the cup holder and putting it under his leg. If it really were his dad, he would've had no problem letting Zelena respond to Cal for him because she's done it before. Zelena looked at Nate suspiciously because something inside her told her not to believe him.

But she didn't push him on it... for now.

―

─── AUTHOR'S NOTE
whew, so after nate's episode, i felt super bad for him because obviously, you know, his issues very much stem from his father, but then after the ShyGuy118 shit, I was like... this dude is genuinely psychotic... but I still like love him... well the psychologist in me loves the complexity and deepness of his character.

don't forget to vote/comment.

xoxo.