I started dreaming about that human again....My special friend @-@ *coughs* yeah...I missed him more than I miss anyone in school..

Every month, he's in my dream..The last one, I saw him in my dream he said..

"You told me you'll wait for me."

I think he was sad in my dream.

later on, I was in a basketball court or something — the event is still confusing, but I can hear songs.Then I saw my...my best friend.. my classmate I guess — beside me...We talked a little then when I looked back, I saw my special friend sitting alone...I was about to walk towards him, but I woke up in real life.

It was sad.

Even though the dream looks normal

I felt sad.

I think I still wanna talk to him as friends — nothing more, nothing less.

Are you seeing this now? if you are..I'm sorry, I was arrogant and..mean and rude to you...If I ever hurt your other friends, I didn't mean that.

...

...

Those are my regrets.

regrets Im not sure if I did

but somehow I think I actually did

I forgot some moments I shared with everyone

But good thing they were written in my other books

I don't pretend to be sad..

That kind of "sad" I was feeling before

I realized it was not the worst

But the feeling I am feeling right now

I can feel it is called "depression"

Eversince I feel depressed, I started to see things that are not real

and hear things that are not true

And it is so frucking real

sonewhere near my heart feels heavier

it feeks like someone's squeezing my heart then my eyes feel like crying

Yes, I can be very emotional..

I am not really weird, but I think that's just how humans see me...

I still wanna be friends...

I hope everyone's doing fine, and I hope I will be doing good.