In which we are not going to make fun of this cryptid's name.

Fouke is apparently pronounced "foke," as in, rhymes with "poke." I will not be mentally pronouncing it that way as I write this article.

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TIMELINE

1908 - the first report of the Fouke Monster is recorded

June 1971 - the first widespread report of the Fouke Monster is recorded

May 1971 - Newspapers begin widely reporting on Fouke Monster sightings

1972 - "The Legend of Boggy Creek" is released

1972 - a man sees a short monster crossing the road

1973 - a skeptic sees a short monster crossing his field

1991 - a Fouke Monster-like skeleton is found

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LOCATIONS

Fouke, Arkansas (duh)

Texarkana, Arkansas

The Sulphur River Bottom, Arkansas

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DESCRIPTION

The Monster has red eyes (guys, come on, be more original) and a hairy, seven-foot-tall bod. His chest is three feet across, so we have another swol cryptid on our hands. He is described as being pretty speedy and, according to some reports, has a tail. Several reports also say that the poor guy kinda stinks, but what do you expect? He lives in a bog!

They know the monster's shoe size, which shouldn't surprise me, but, you know, it kinda does. He has three toes and is a whopping 14EE. Which means this guy has feet.

The Fouke Monster is sometimes referred to as the "Boggy Creek Monster." Why they wouldn't refer to him by that all the time is beyond me. They're cruel up there in Arkansas.

In most of the sightings, he's either crossing roads or standing at the edges of woods, so if you're ever driving by Fouke, Arkansas, watch out for Fouke Monster crossings, and scan the trees just in case.

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FIRST SIGHTING*

Now, this is a scary one. The Jersey Devil, as you'll later find out, was obviously reported to have killed a whole bunch of people, but that story has evolved into near myth-like status. This one's pretty fresh.

A Fouke family was supposedly attacked in their home by the Fouke Monster. One of them, Bobby Ford, was admitted to the hospital for minor scratches and shock - and, I would imagine, a fair amount of emotional duress. Ford would be the one who supplied the first description of the Fouke Monster.

According to Ford, when he freed himself from the monster's grasp, he ran so quickly towards the front door that he didn't even need to open it, he just blasted through the wood. Which...is hilarious.

I'm sorry, but it is! It's like those cartoons where people break through brick walls and leave a perfect imprint of themselves behind.

Ford's wife, Charlotte, saw the creature's arm and his hunting companions shot at it as it fled into the woods.

The sheriff found strange footprints and scratch marks on the porch of the Ford residence. This would actually be part of why the Fouke Monster got so infamous - law enforcement supposedly found this proof.

A reporter by the name of Jim Powell visited the Ford residence after hearing their story to find the family moving out. They had supposedly lived there for about a week but were abandoning the property immediately after their encounter with the Fouke Monster (I don't blame them). Intrigued, Powell reported on the case, launching the Fouke Monster into infamy.

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FOLLOWING SIGHTINGS**

IS THE CRYPTID SHORT?

In 1972, a man saw a hairy, bipedal monster cross the road in front of his car. The key distinction about this sighting, however, is that the man reported the creature as being rather short. Now, we know from Mr. Ford that this cryptid is an absolute giant - so this man might have just seen a very hairy, vertically challenged man.

OKAY, SO THE CRYPTID MIGHT BE SHORT

In 1973, a farmer, known to be a skeptic, sighted a hairy not-human crossing his field. However, like the last sighting, he reported the creature as being short - four feet tall, to be exact.

Maybe Ford just didn't want to admit that he had his ass handed to him by a vertically challenged cryptid.

IS THE CRYPID DEAD NOW?

Two hunters found a near-complete skeleton while in the woods. It was only missing a skull, claws, and tail bones. They suspected it of belonging to the Fouke Monster and gathered the bones to show people.

Okay, um. You find a seemingly human skeleton of a (freakishly, to be fair) tall dude, lacking a tail or claws or anything saying that it's not human...and your first thought is cryptid? My first thought would be, oh my god, it's a body!

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MAJOR MEDIA APPEARANCES

"THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK"

You'll see this film reappear later on because some people think it's about the Jersey Devil. Nope - it's about our good old friend the Fouke Monster.

This movie was apparently a "drive-in sensation," which, if modern media is anything to go by, means people liked to get it on to the story of the Fouke Monster. (God, I hate myself.) It made $25 million dollars, though, so go off, I guess.

It only got five out of ten stars on IMDB, but it's a cult classic, so if you've ever wanted to join a cult and happen to also love cryptids, here's your chance.

SEVERAL TELEVISION DOCUMENTARIES

Our good friend the Fouke-ster has shown up in the following TV documentaries: "Monsters and Mysteries in America," "Finding Bigfoot," "Mysteries at the Museum," "Monsterquest," "Lost Tapes," and "Weird Travels."

I'm surprised I've never heard of him, seeing as he's so popular. Oh, well. He seems to have done well for himself with or without my recognition.

MERCH

The Fouke Monster has merch available in several different online stores: www.foukemonster.net, www.legendofboggycreek.com, and www.foukemonstermart.com. So if you're looking to spend some money on cryptid merch, rep your favorite beastie, hop over to one of these online stores.

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POSSIBLE HISTORICAL SOURCE

THE SASQUATCH

Pretty much anyone who knows anything about the Fouke Monster points out the obvious similarities between it and the infamous sasquatch. The Fouke Monster has been called such genius nicknames as the Sasquatch's Cousin and the Southern Sasquatch. You can read more about the Sasquatch later!

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MEME

This is a screenshot from an actual video you can watch with your own two eyes. It's called "Lost Tapes Season Two Episode Three: Southern Sasquatch" and it's a very old cryptozoologist television show episode.

Watch it if you want stunning visuals such as the funky guy below.

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FURTHER READING

"Sightings," www.foukemonster.net

"The Fouke Monster," www.thelegendofboggycreek.com

"Fouke Monster," www.encyclopediaofarkansas.net

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*While this isn't technically the first sighting, as you can see by the timeline, it was the most important, so I put it down as the "first sighting."

**One interesting thing I thought I should note about the reports of the Fouke Monster: nearly all of them come from the town of Fouke itself. You might be thinking, well, duh, but actually, after cryptids become famous, surrounding towns suddenly have a ton of "sightings," trying to cash in on the phenomenon. That hasn't really happened with this cryptid - virtually all the sightings come straight from Fouke itself.