7. Please

I can hear this song coming to me.

All of you who have nowhere to go,
Hope is in your hearts.
When you overcome the night of sadness,
I am sure you will come out
Holding the strength to live on.

((The Everlasting Guilty Crown -Egoist))

-----

"Rei-chan?"

I didn't answer. I stayed with my face turned away from her, my eyes closed--I pretended to be asleep. Acting like I didn't hear her, I remained silent.

"Hey, Rei-chan," Sae spoke up--was it so obvious I was awake? "I got a 100 on my test today! I placed first in my class and year!" she cheered, trying hard to sound happy. She did sound happy, but there was a vague strain in her voice.

I shuffled, getting into a more comfortable position. I didn't open my eyes--I ignored her as I pretended to still be in deep sleep.

"Rei-chan?"

-----

"Rei, we've got tonsa homework!" Yamamoto Takeshi whined, slumping against my bed as he rested his face on his crossed arms.

I didn't respond. I just stared at him boredly, not even thinking of how to respond. He noticed, and looked up.

"You okay, Rei?"

I pulled my knees to my chest, resting my hand on them, then my chin. I looked at him, wondering if I should answer that question. Instead, I asked him, "Hey, Takeshi, what would you do if one day you realize your whole life has been a lie?"

He seemed taken aback at the suddenness of the question. He stared back at me for a while--with a face like huh?--then chuckled.

His signature laugh, which seems a different form of familiar now--now, I recognize it as the laugh of Yamamoto Takeshi, an anime character; instead of the laugh of an annoying childhood friend--and I felt that loss physically, a form of pain I couldn't describe.

"Well," he slouched against the hospital bed, "I don't really understand, but does it really matter? I mean, we complain about having mountains of homework, but we still finish it before class the next day because we don't wanna get scolded."

"I really don't see the correlation," I couldn't resist saying.

"I guess." he laughed in response.

I sighed. Asking this guy was pointless--he's too happy-go-lucky. Or even, what was I even expecting. That question was way too vague. Humans aren't mind-readers.

"Rei," I turned to Takeshi as he suddenly spoke up, "Get well soon, kay?"

I bit my lip.

I don't want to.

But he was giving me that face. A face that was unusual to see even in the anime--a stern, sad look that showed only concern and worry, no hint of his trademark grin.

I swallowed my negativity and nodded.

"Okay."

-----

I stood up. No one was around right now--it was the dead of the night, but I was awake. I could seem to get myself to close my eyes today--I was feeling restless.

I want to go back to my world, I thought. A place I could express myself fully as the sporty one of three local clowns. A place where I could be as free as I could, doing whatever I wanted and being wherever I wanted.

And what did that bring you? A stupid death.

My fists clenched at the passing thought. Shut up, I reminded myself. I loved that world. I'm not a reality-escaping gamer or NEET. I'm perfectly fine being a real-lifer, thank you very much.

What can I do in this world? This world has a set path it has to take. I shouldn't meddle with it--I'd rather not, honestly.

Your life would be living Dante's Inferno, I tell ya.

Void. That dark space. He's the one that sent me here. He said something about me being one that would have rathered stay dead instead of revenge or passing on?

He may not have been far off. Right now, I feel no burning desire for revenge. I admit I want to hunt down those people that killed me, despite knowing it's pointless. But in all honesty, I just want to see my brothers again.

Screw revenge. Screw reincarnation. I just want to go back to my old life. Am I acting childish by being so homesick? I want to go home.

I want to live as Drew Cite again.

But what about Ninomiya Rei?

-----

Sae and Sui didn't stop showing up at the hospital. They showed up every time, each time with a smile more strained than before.

Sae brought news of their day and wishes of an early release, all which I'd responded with a fake smile. Each time she saw my fake smile, she seemed to know it wasn't real. her face would fall and she'd become disappointed, then bounce back up, trying not to cry as she pretended to be her chirpy, happy self.

Sui, on the other hand, seemed more and more reluctant to come visit. She never smiled once, always sitting by the side and waiting for time to pass, not once looking at me nor speaking up. It was as if she knew exactly what I thought of them now--mildly tiring to deal with--and was trying to respond to those thoughts.

And they're five, as hard as I try to believe. They're sharp. Or maybe I'm just so readable.

As the twins left to buy some drinks, the phone rang. Mama Lula's phone, which she had left by me in case Ninomiya Yuuichirou, the father of the Ninomiya household, called. I had been tasked to receive the call. As per habit, I picked it up quickly.

"Hello?" I spoke first.

Rei, is that you? Are you alright? I heard you had an attack, I'm so sorry I wasn't able to call sooner. Look I'm headed back right now. How're the kids now?

His bombardment of question left me a little stunned. Realizing the silent was for my answer, I panicked. What should I say? What would Ninomiya Rei say? "I'm fine, dad." I told him. However, my train of thought stopped right there.

I'm fine? Like hell you are.

"It wasn't anything bad, really." I laughed dryly, "The doctor told me everything I needed to know so--"

Rei.

I stopped. I could feel tears falling down my cheeks. Huh? Why? I don't even--why am I--

What happened?

"Nothing, dad! Nothing happened!" I tried to sound happy, but my voice cracked and I sniffled, obviously crying. I desperately wiped them off with my sleeve, trying my best to stop crying--of all times to cry, this is a really weird time to cry, Drew.

To my surprise, the door suddenly opened.

And at the door stood a man. He donned an expensive looking suit, wore glasses, and had his hair slicked to the back--this man was, although slightly different and vague in my memories, Ninomiya Yuuichirou.

By his ear was his mobile phone, and he clicked the end call button before tucking it away into his pocket. Despite the scary disciplinarian face and expression he held, he rushed over to me and gave me a hug.

His chest was broad. Warm. His arms wrapped my whole body easily and held me firmly, leaving no space to escape--but I really didn't feel like escaping. This was a warmth I couldn't feel in my past life.

The warmth of a father.

And that day, I wept. I wailed, sobbed, cried for what seemed like an eternity, letting loose all I could and everything I felt into my father's embrace.

Today, I can be as much of a baby as I want. Today, Drew Cite will mourn. She will grieve about everything she lost. Today, she will lament of her own death. Today, she will spend her last day as the crybaby she always was.

But tomorrow, Ninomiya Rei will take over. Ninomiya Rei will live on, not as a ghost of the past, but as a boy that looks toward the future. Tomorrow, he will live on, with as much joy as possible--he will live his own life.

Tomorrow, Drew Cite no longer exists.

Tomorrow, I'll be Ninomiya Rei.

-----

"I'm home!" I called, raising my arms, stretching my limbs. I felt elated--one whole week cooped up in a hospital was so boring! I felt so elated stepping foot back home.

Sae and Sui rush out to greet me, leaping into a 'welcome-back' hug while screaming inaudible words I assumed were 'welcome back's. Taken by surprise, I lose my balance and drop on my back, unable to suddenly support the extra weight.

We laugh.

"Kids, mind helping me with all this stuff?" Dad called over signalling to mine and his luggage that was in the car.

"Yeeess!!" Sae responded cheerfully, dashing over. Sui followed obediently, and I was left on the ground, forgotten. I sit up, smiling at them as Sae tried to carry a luggage two times her size. Dad shrieked worriedly as she staggered as if she was going to be crushed.

Dad was going to stay with us from now on, apparently. He was worried that next time I get an attack he wouldn't be in a position to come back ASAP, so he decided to take a temporary leave--in which he told his boss he would either work from home or go over there during emergencies.

(By the way, his work place isn't fixed. The office is somewhere in Italy or something, but his work includes traveling to other countries so he's rarely in Italy anyways, he says.)

I'd told him that he didn't have to come over next time I get an attack, (in which he responded with the face of a puppy that's just been told to stay at home and watch the house, so I had to shut up and let him do what he wanted because THOSE EYES)

I flip the mailbox open, to see a few envelopes unread from the week I was away. Most were addressed to Dad, so they were probably work-related or bills--I don't know, I never look at them. Another was for Mama Lula, but the last one was addressed to me.

It was a small parcel.

I took the mail inside the house. I tossed the ones that weren't for me on the living room table, settling down on the sofa to open mine.

It contained a small box--it was the kind that jewellery shops put whatever you bought in--it wasn't very fancy, but it just gave me a weird feeling. Why would I get something like this? The box was completely black and had no other design; the exterior of the box was made of felt cloth--what's with this high quality product...

There was a letter behind the box, and I decided to read it first.

I thought you might want this back

...It said. All I could think in response was that the words were handwritten in amazingly pretty handwriting. Nothing else came to mind--the writer, the sender, the contents of the box...I had no idea.

Hesitantly, I picked up the box and lifted the lid.

And inside were two hairpins--two bobby pins that was each adorned with different coloured gems. One was a red gem, the other was a blue gem.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Why is Void being such a nice guy?" I wondered out loud.

-----

-----

AN: Finally, it's over! No, not the story. The story has barely gotten started. but from next chapter on, we're moving into canon timeline! It took me seven chapters, but I'm finally at the starting point, I could say.

(Actually, half of the reason I wanted to write this story was these seven chapters)

So I'll explain a few things here: In case anyone is confused--I don't think anyone is though--

The reason the main character refers to himself as a 'Ninomiya Rei' or 'Drew Cite' so inconsistently is because he himself is confused. He doesn't know which one he should be. Mentally, he is Drew Cite, but physically, he is Ninomiya Rei.

Up till now, he has been wavering--should he just move on, discarding his past life? Most people would tell him to move on and quit moping about the past. But this is all too sudden for him--all of a sudden, he's told he's dead and he's gotta live a new life as a completely different person. What's worse, he's completely alone here.

So yeah.

Also, if anyone forgot about those bobby pins at the end, it's in chapter two. They were birthday presents from her brothers, Eve and Zen. I guess Void decided that he'd send over something as a present--as a gift or blessing for him to have a safe journey from now on.

(By the way, Void does not have a set gender? Like, I have no idea. He? She? I've been using 'he' for now, but like, seriously, what gender do you think he'd be?)