Dimitri: Hey, do you have any invisibility potions?
Daiki: No, but I may have something better!
Daiki: *grabs a small box* Nukes!

****

The Unnamed Duke: *takes picture of Dimitri's ass*
Unnamed Duke: *defeated sigh* Dang
Dimitri: Why did you take a photo of my ass?
Unnamed Duke: I didn't, this is a glow stick
Dimitri: I literally just saw the photo you just took of my ass
Unnamed Duke: No no, it was a misclick

****

Duke Forris: Now, you are engaged to her. Doesn't she look cute? *Holds up picture of a girl*
Child Unnamed Duke: *starts crying*

****

Huxley: *explaining how Aletris can do magic* Something brought you to this school Aletris Aynes. Call it what you will, fate, destiny-
Aletris: Dumb luck

****

Person: *looks at Aletris, Jink, Estia, and Dimitri* Stupid Americans
Aletris: Hey! We're not all bad!
Estia: *points at herself* I'm Irish
Dimitri: *speak a mix of Romanian and some unknown language*
Person: *looks at Jink* What's your excuse?
Jink: No excuse, I just-
Estia and Aletris: HE'S BABY!!

****

Person: *being transphobic*
Dimitri and Morgan: ...*le sad*
Aletris and Estia: *mean/agressive to the person* You take that fucking back!!!

****

Unnamed Duke: *sees Aletris with a girl*
Unnamed Duke: So you like her?
Aletris: yes
Unnamed Duke: *sees Aletris with a guy*
Unnamed Duke: So you like him now?
Aletris: Yes
Unnamed Duke: Who do you like!? Boys? Girls?
Aletris: Y E S
Unnamed Duke: ...
Aletris: ...
Unnamed Duke: Fella you are so fucking valid

****

Aletris' phone: *receiving call from: Daddy*
Sky: *snickering* You still call your dad "daddy"?
Aletris: *answering the phone, looking at Sky dead in the eye, with a completely straight face* Oh, hello Dimitri
Sky: *chokes*
*1 hour earlier*
Dimitri: Hey, do you know the best way to fuck with Sky?