"I'm scared. I'm scared."
I lie in a corner of my little brothers bedroom as he plays with his toys, completely oblivious to what's going on in my mind and what's happening to the blackness which is now my soul. My heart a mere black whole with chains.
"I'm scared"
My mom keeps yelling from downstairs to my father.
"I'm scared"
Just end it.
"I'm scared"
Kill them!
"NO!" I scream out as I begin to claw at my head trying to free myself of this poison.
My brother briefly stops jamming the tiles of the piano to look up at me before passing on to a different toy with a slight "dah!"
Things will be better without them!
"Get out of my head! I don't want you there" I get into an impossibly tighter ball on the floor that's as cold as the voice in my head.
Father hits me.
Mom yells at me.
My sister reminds me of the horrible truth.
My little brother needs to be protected.
Grandma died.
"No. I don't want to remember"
My father beats up my mom as a little child is hiding under the bed, screaming and crying.
Wanting to do something but she's to weak to do anything.
"No, no more memories. Please"
I breathe in and out ragged breaths with tears staining my face, flowing into a never ending stream.
You know how to end it. What are you waiting for Kayla?
"No! I won't hurt them! They're my family"
More memories flash through my mind.
My sister telling me the truth for the first time "You weren't even supposed to be born".
Going to school and having to pretend I was happy when I was breaking on the inside.
"I'm scared. I'm scared"
I can't take this anymore.
"I'm scared. I'm scared"
I rock back and forth with my arms folded tightly around my legs, hugging them to my chest.
I'm crying.
I'm weak.
And don't forget worthless.
"Stop!"
"Kayla?"
I jolt, nearly exiting my ball of shame.
But I slightly relax as I see It's just Ralph.
I dig my head back in between the crook of my arms and my knees.
"Kayla what's wrong?" I feel him come closer and kneel in front of me but I still don't look up at him.
There's no way he cares.
"Kayla?" He gently lifts up my tear stained face till it's level with his.
"Kayla what's wrong"
I finally give in.
This darkness is to much; it's consuming me from the inside out.
"I'm scared" I finally admit out loud as my voice cracks causing two new rivers to flow down my cheeks.
"I'm scared..."

***

My brother and family have gone to sleep and I'm once again curled up into a ball on the cold floor in a dark scary corner but there's something new.
A bright warm color trickles down my hands that cling to my insane head, staining my hair as I rock myself back and forth.
"Scary corner..." I mutter as I stand up and examine my bloody hands.
"Scary..." I bend down and pick up the red knife.
"Corner" I stand to my full hight again and walk out of the picture.
I'm done being scared.

Thanks to my lil sis Martinao99 for the idea.

Okay! So this was a brief killer chapter I just felt inspired to write as I listened to Ice Nine Kills and Pierce The Veil.
So....
That's about it my lil Ace's!
Akray out!♠️