YOU ARE AS SUCH: golden eyed and bleary. you got veins like the rough edges of a dried leaf in winter when you get mad and baby do you know rage like a second skin. wait. do you?
i'm writing you a letter―

rephrase: i am writing a letter in your address is in mind, but i never leave my room, so tough fucking luck. rephrase: i am writing a letter with your name in the corner, destined for the inside of my drawer. rephrase: i don't miss you.

i don't miss you―but occasionally i wonder what is it you're doing with your life? have you replaced me yet? can i be replaced? do you listen to music that we both like & think of me? i am a bleeding abomination of man. which, i do know, is dearly melodramatic of me, and yet. and yet. do you miss me? did you know that i bleed gold when you aren't looking?
it's my best kept secret.
i guess secrets don't matter? how does time work when i keep fluctuating in memory? when you are you and me simultaneously? can i ever find the line where you end and i begin?

REVISE: i lied. i miss you. i miss you in the way i miss winter being cold. in the way i miss being happy in the summer. in the way i miss the ache in my stomach when i eat. have you ever had cold water on an empty stomach because god it feels good.

IGNORE REVISION.

[what is God: A Revolution?
baby i am at war with:
me, myself, the world, you, my memories, this concept of self i haven't developed i made myself in someone else's shoes and now i can't find another pair as comfortable.]

OKAY? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN EXPLAIN YOURSELF?
there is a dark thing
festering between
my second
& third rib
and it aches
when i'm not looking
―can you fix
this ugly heart ?
it's half shattered and
poisoning the rest
of me.
did you know?
A REVOLUTION IS A FULL ROTATION OF 360 DEGREES AND -

maybe i become you; i look golden eyed and bleary in the cracked seams of the mirror.

revise: revise: revise: re: do you believe in redemption? or the sun in winter? hey do you think that we could
i don't know. hey. wanna hang out i
have this noose around my neck in the shape of your mouth; can you hold me like i'm bleeding?

( can you hurt me Like You Mean It?)

HEY I HAVE TO KNOW IF

WHEN YOU DREAM SWEET DREAMS

THAT ON OCCASION I

MAKE AN APPEARANCE.

AM I ALL SILVER

AND CUTTING TEETH AND

TOO SOFT FACE?

DOES MY HAIR SLICK BACK LIKE

I'VE BEEN PUT IN THE RAIN?

DO YOU THINK THAT COULD BE

A METAPHOR FOR GRIEF?

do you miss me like the moon longs for the sun; as the tides wade for the moon; hey would you― break that gold head of yours right open so that i could feed on the raspberry slurry of thoughts you keep in there? CAN YOU SAY THAT YOU HATE ME AND MEAN IT BABY I AM SO DO SORRY I MISS YOU MISS YOU CAN YOU PLEASE COME home?

do your eyes bleed blue at the thought of me?

revision: CTRL A. BACKSPACE.