Bruce

"Perseus and my third anniversary's coming up." Loki explained to Clint, Tony, Pietro, Steve, and I.

We were walking down the busy New York street to help Loki find what he was looking for. Apparently the Norse god already picked out what he was going to get his boyfriend, but wouldn't share, wanting to keep it a surprise. Loki dragged the visiting Hawkeye, below twenty Pietro, bickering Tony and Steve, and best friend me to aid his worries before he bought it. It was quite amusing for the silver tongue tone to be so anxious about buying a simple gift, but the fretting god was also starting to get on some nerves.

Vision, Wanda, Natasha, Thor, and Perseus were hanging out in the tower. Perseus just finished his latest mission from the director and wished to relax. This allowed Loki to wiggle his way out of the building while the team entertained the Guardian. My thoughts were interrupted by the genius himself who snorted loudly at Loki's store choice.

I felt my eyebrow rise up in confusion, a blush forming on my cheeks,"Why are we here, Loki?"

The Norse shook his head in confusion,"This store was chosen by google to hold what I wish to find for Perseus."

"Did you put this on my search history?" Tony demanded, receiving no response in return.

Without waiting for our interference, Loki disappeared inside. We all shared looks before following the god into the store. Loki was already at the front desk conversing with the male who was bluntly checking the trickster out. Said person just ignored his obvious attraction and grew steadily frustrated as the boy evaded his question.

"Sir, can I interest you in any of these materials? They're on clearance and are no trouble putting in, quite pleasurable taking out if I do say so myself." The worker winked flirtatiously, leaning closer to Loki.

"No!" Perseus' boyfriend growled, annoyed,"Just tell me where you keep your vibrators, and I will be on my way."

I flat out chocked on my spit as that word came out of Loki's mouth. Pietro ran face first into Steve's body who had frozen in shock. Tony on the other hand whistled and Clint just bawled out laughing, doubling over from the force of his amusement. The boy on the other hand just frowned mockingly and grabbed Loki's hand to lead him deeper into the store.

"Loki!" I hissed, quickly following,"What are you doing?"

He tilted his head, confused,"What ever do you mean? Perseus is often very tight in his muscles, and my hands get tired pushing into them to coax them to relax. I thought he'd appreciate something to be able to continue like I can't because he does make the loudest appreciation sounds when I do work on him."

"TMI! TMI!" Pietro groaned, shutting his eyes and putting hands on his ears,"I don't want to hear anymore about your sex lives than I need to."

Clint chuckled loudly, very entertained by this situation,"Just buy the toy, I'm sure Perseus won't expect this at all."

"I don't think you should get this for the anniversary though." Steve cut in quickly, quite red in the face,"Maybe Valentines Day."

"No." Tony snorted,"Please get this, and let me be there when you give it to him."

"I'm not sure Loki, but whatever you think is best for the mark of your 3rd year commitment, you do." I told him truthfully.

Loki frowned at all of us,"I do not understand. This isn't a sex aid, why are you all reacting like it is?"

My eyebrows furrowed,"Vibrator, Loki?"

"That's what we Midgard people call a specific toy used for sex." Tony input helpfully.

Loki's frown deepened,"I do no wish for carnal pleasure as a gift. I wanted to get Perseus something to relax his muscles. He always asks for a massage after work, and his neck and back muscles are so tense. I want for him to not hurt, but I always have to stop before he can stop hurting, this can help him."

"Massager, Loki!" Pietro practically shouted,"A massager, it's not a vibrator! Get Perseus a massager!"

"Or at least a coupon to a place that does massages." Steve recommended quickly.

"Please get him a vibrator too though." Clint pleaded, holding his stomach from all the laughter.

Loki suddenly narrowed his eyes mischievously,"We shall see."

***

"How was shopping?" Perseus hummed as we entered the room, munching on a piece of Swiss cheese.

He sat atop the counter island, ducking under the hanging pans. Natasha was sitting at the table in front of him, sipping a glass of soda sophisticatedly. Thor, Wanda, and Vision were sitting at the dinning table playing a board game. They all looked over as we entered, their eyebrows raising at the present in Loki's hands.

My group held their breath as the sneaky god handed the packaged surprise to his boyfriend. Perseus looked suspiciously at it, glancing inquisitively at Loki and us all. He turned it over a couple times in his hands, testing the weight and wrapping. The Agent accepted the chaste kiss form his boyfriend on the cheek, focusing on the gift more-so though.

"What is it?" Perseus asked curiously, taking the ribbon off.

Loki smirked at Perseus, waiting until a small part of the item was showing before responding,"A vibrator."

The reaction was immediate. The Agent jerked back so hard, he lost his balance and fell off the island. It was like in slow motion, his eyes widening to the largest degree, his mouth in a small surprise "O" of shock. Perseus' feet flew into the air, and his arms flailed wildly to catch himself. The package fell onto the counter, and the Agent instead hit several of the hanging pans above him.

With his body, the whole shelf went with him. Life restarted and a loud crashing sounded along with Perseus' yelp as he hit the ground. A curse sprang from his lips as one of the pans nailed him in his jewels, but he was still too shocked to recognize the pain. The Agent hauled himself off the ground to grapple with the counter and hold himself up.

His face was so red, and he looked ridiculous holding his crotch tightly and looking downright appalled at his boyfriend. The one whose two words caused the reaction displayed by the usually collected man. Said man swiftly grabbed the present off the counter and hid it behind his back, glaring at the smug Loki.

"Do you even know what a vibrator is, Loki?" He hissed, clearly embarrassed.

Loki nodded his head eagerly,"Yes, the boy working showed me how to use it. I don't recommend having it on while sleeping though, it was very stimulating. You wouldn't be able to sleep, but you can control it from a little remote that comes with it!"

I couldn't help but snicker at the look on the Agent's face. It was hilarious, and the people who were with Loki and I earlier were trying to hide their laughs. The people who weren't with us though looked just as baffled as Perseus. Loki leaned forward so his mouth was in Perseus' ear, whispering into it.

Perseus subconsciously licked his lips' staring off into space. I laughed as Perseus grabbed Loki and dragged him across the island to kiss him roughly before pushing the god off of it onto the floor. Loki kept grinning even as he fell, getting up instantly and kissing the side of Perseus' annoyed face apologetically. The Agent ignored him, exasperatedly rolling his eyes. Then he ripped the present open the rest of the way and began waving it in Thor, Natasha, Wanda, and Vision's faces.

"It's not a vibrator." Perseus explained looking quite relieved,"Loki got me something to massage myself with. He was just being a complete, and utter ass!"

"Don't act like you don't like it, Perseus." Loki teased, trailing his finger up and down Perseus' arm.

The Agent just rolled his eyes,"Happy Anniversary to you too, Loki."

Tell me what you think...
12/17/17