❝why do some things stay the same,
when some don't?
now we're all queens on the screen,
happy and torn; there we'll stay
young and beautiful.❞
— mø, new year's eve

♥

A MILLION WORDS JUMBLED INTO A KNOT in the back of my throat, and I couldn't seem to untangle it... to find anything that didn't answer the irrational question that always seemed to linger in the back of my mind.

What would Levi say?

I had a gut feeling that if I told this girl that she was gorgeous, she would punch me in the throat. I also had a feeling that she wouldn't take it very gracefully if I asked her... if she liked meat. Maybe Levi could tell that she liked dick, but by the soft, seductive smile on her lips, I was worried her preferences leaned more toward... cutting my dick off.

But I mean, Levi did always say I couldn't read women. Meh.

Everything blurred as the door fell closed behind me, hitting my back and nudging me forward a clumsy step. I cursed under my breath, straightening to find her still fucking staring at me, shrouded in the hazy veil of smoke that... drew me closer, inch by... inch.

Silently, she offered me the cigarette, and I shook my head.

Something in the back of my mind screamed at me to run, but nooooo. Like the idiot that I was, I didn't. It was like my instincts short circuited, and I was left with nothing but sheer insanity.

"Mhmm. I know I'm not wrong," she said quietly, as if the prospect of her ever being wrong was simply impossible. Yeah. I was completely fucking mesmerized by an entitled bitch, and instead of throwing me off, that fact reeled me in deeper.

Fuck. No. Not again.

Levi was right. I was into bitches.

Her eyes flashed, and for a second, there was a trace of something violent crackling in the darkness. Between us. But then everything softened—the edges of her lips and the dangerously sharp shards of light in her eyes. Lazily, she cocked her head to the side and hitched herself up onto the picnic table. "Your name is Nick."

"Um, yeah, I'm a Nick," I stuttered, so fucking awkward that Levi could probably sense it from inside. Yeah. Levi was probably groaning, knowing, just knowing, that I was fucking this up.

Her brows rose. "A Nick? Or the Nick?"

Fuck, she was practically setting herself up for a trademark Levi line. I knew Levi would say something that would border on offensive, and welp, maybe I didn't come off as being completely disrespectful, but the inane talent of saying something stupid definitely ran in the family.

Because my dumb ass didn't think before I sputtered, "Actually, Nick is consistently in the top 50 baby names for boys, so I'm just... one of the many Nicks, I guess."

Yep. I was seriously rambling about the statistics of popular baby names in front of a girl I'd never wanted to see again. Crude? No. Slow as fuck? Yeeeeerp.

She blinked once.

"Even in 2019," I continued nervously when she didn't say anything. "So I guess there's just going to be a loooot more Nicks in the future."

"Oh, joy," she snickered, rolling her eyes. "The things I have to look forward to."

Heat rushed to my cheeks. "I'm Nick. I'm t—"

"Oh, I know. I know exactly who you are, Nick."

My breath caught in my throat as she inhaled, exhaled, simmered in that chilly haze of smoke. There were too many soft shadows spilling from the sky, cast across her tinted cheeks, her glossed lips, her glittering eyes; it seemed to embody her, string her together into an empty darkness, capture her in a fragmented moment—as if she barely existed beyond broken bones and broken hearts.

This girl would break my fucking heart... and enjoy it.

A teasing smile tugged at her lips. Her gaze held me hostage as she went through the motions, twisting a strand of hair around her finger, biting her lower lip, fighting off a smile... before beckoning me closer with a jerk of her chin. Fuck, it made me dizzy.

Maybe she did know exactly who I was because all those little taunts made me lightheaded. Was I weak or was she just... dangerous?

One side of her lips quirked up.

Dangerous. Definitely fucking dangerous... in the sexiest way.

"I know that you're not the brightest Nick of all the Nicks."

Yikes. Big fucking yikes.

She'd have to copyright that before Levi stole it.

"No." My cheeks warmed. "Not really."

"Because you... followed me here," she drawled so fucking softly that a shiver ran up my spine. "Because you thought... that slap was a clear indication that I wanted you, yeah?" Smoke billowed, twisted, faded between us. "Because you're an entitled, arrogant asshole."

Fuuuuuuck. Maybe I'd let this girl hit me again.

I masked the completely fucked up cocktail of terror and arousal with a nervous laugh. "Men, huh."

"Or maybe..." A soft edge traced those innocent words into something threatening. "Maybe... you wanted to try your luck a second time?"

My head spun. I swallowed hard, fighting off the dizzy spell as she hopped off the picnic table to close the gap between us. Suddenly, space and time didn't exist because she was right in front of me in this fucking moment.

"Well, Nick, go ahead," she whispered, her lips inches from mine. "I promise the second hit will hurt a hell of a lot more."

Did she... want me to?

"I... I didn't..."

"Hey, Nick!"

My heart stuttered at the sound of his voice, but she didn't move, didn't back away, didn't even blink. No. Beyond the thin wisps of smoke fluttering up between us, her lips curled into that soft, secretive smile that scared me in all the right—fucked up—ways.

"Nick," he hissed again, the door creaking open wider behind me. "Nick, you need to..."

I whirled around, and it felt like coming up for air. I could breathe again. My vision cleared, my heart steadied, and the world didn't seem so hazy. I blinked at him. "What?"

"Hey, sorry, but there's... uh, a situation inside," Fallon muttered, shifting on his feet uncomfortably. "It's Levi."

—OF FUCKING COURSE IT IS LEVI. 🤦🏽‍♀️

Yeah. He's one of those people you can't leave alone for five minutes. LOOOOOL anyone have any ideas what he's up to?? 😅😅