He grabs the lamp off the table causing  the cord to rip out of the wall before smashing it on the floor. Why is his frist instinct to break everything in sight?

"Stop it!" I scream.

He doesn't turn to look at me before grabbing a vase and breaking it against the brick.

"Hardin you are going to break all of our stuff! Please stop it!"

"This is your fault Tessa! You fucking cheated on me!" He shouts back and grabs another vase.

I scurry into the living room to join him and grab the object from his hand before he can break it.

"I know it is! I am sorry! I am so sorry Hardin, please just talk to me." I beg.

I can not hold my tears back any longer.

"Please Hardin." I cry.

"You fucked up Tessa, so badly!" His fist slams against the wall.

I knew this was coming and honestly I am surprised it took this long. I am thankful he chose that wall to hit, the brick surely would have damaged his hand much worse.

"Just leave me alone damn it! Go away!" He paces back and forth before slamming both hands against the wall, not punching the surface this time, thank god.

"I love you." I blurt, I need to try to calm him but he is just so drunk and intimidating.

'You don't act like it! You kissed another fucking guy! Then you bring Zed to my fucking house!"

My heart lurches at the mention of Zed's name. Hardin humiliated him.

"I know.. I am sorry." I fight the urge to call him out for being a hypocrite. Yes, I know what I did was wrong, so wrong but I have forgiven him for hurting me repeatedly.

"You know how fucking crazy, how absolutely fucking mad it makes me to see you with anyone else and you go and do this shit!"

"I said I am sorry Hardin.. what more.."

He pushes the chair over and there is a pounding at the door. Great, now the neighbors are going to be involved.

"Hardin! I swear to god if you hurt her!" It's Zed.

He really does have a death wish.

"You have five fucking seconds to leave Zed or so help me god I will fucking kill you!" Hardin screams. The veins in his neck are turning a deep purple and he is beginning to resemble a monster.

"I'm not leaving, open the door or I will call the cops!" Zed challenges.

"Tell him to leave now." Hardin instructs.

"Zed.. everything is fine. Just go please. It's fine. I will call you tomorrow."

Hardin heads toward the door and I grab his shirt in my hand.

"She won't be calling and your time is up." Hardin warns and pulls himself out of my grip and grips the door handle.

"Don't Hardin, or the cops will come." I beg him.

"Just give me two minutes, that's it and he will go."

"You barely know him who the fuck does he think he is coming here and trying to play the god damned savior?"

"One minute, that's it and he will leave. Just stay here, unless you want to get arrested."

"One minute." He snaps.

I hate him like this.

When I open the door Zed is pacing in the hall.

"You shouldn't stay here, he is a fucking psycho." He says.

I close the door and pray that Hardin didn't hear that.

"No, he's not."

"Yeah he is, he is in there smashing shit. I can hear it."

"He is angry, drunk and angry."

"Exactly, who knows what he is capable of."

"He wouldn't do anything to me."

"You don't know that." His eyes are full of worry but I don't like the way he is talking about Hardin.

"I really appreciate you worrying about me but I know him better than anyone, he isn't going to do anything except yell and break stuff. Please just go home, I know you have good intentions but I really need to be able to calm him down and you aren't helping that. I am really sorry but please go."

I feel terrible telling him to leave especially after Hardin being so cruel to him but it's not a good idea for him to stay. I hear Hardin's boots hit the floor and I beg Zed again.

"Fine, I will go. He needs to get his shit together. Both of you do." Zed says in a low voice.

"I know." I agree with him and walk back into the apartment.

 "He's gone?" Hardin asks.

"Yes, he is gone."

"I am surprised you didn't leave with him."

"Stop it."

"You fucked up."

"I am sorry Hardin, I wasn't thinking clearly." I speak as soft and slow as I can manage.

"Sorry doesn't erase the image from my mind. It's all I can see." He tugs at his hair.

I walk toward him and stand directly in front of him. He reeks of whiskey.

"Then look at me, look at me." I bravely put my hands on his face, forcing him to look directly at me.

"You kissed him, you kissed someone else." His voice is much lower than it was seconds ago.

"I know I did, and I am so sorry Hardin. I wasn't thinking. You know how irrational I can be."

"That's not an excuse."

"I know baby, I know." I am hoping those words will soften him.

"It hurts." He says, his bloodshot eyes soften.

My chest aches because he sounds like a child, a lonely, sad, child. I can't help but picture Hardin as a child, hiding away as his parents fight over his father's alcohol abuse.

"I'm sorry. Please forgive me."

"I knew better than to have a girlfriend, not that I ever wanted one but this is what happens when people date..or get married. This type of shit is why I need to be alone. I don't want to go through this." He pulls away from me.

"It won't happen again, I will never do anything like this again."

"It doesn't matter Tess, one of us will. That is what people do when they love each other. They hurt each other then break up or get divorced. I don't want that for us, for you."

"That won't happen with us. We are different."

"It happens with everyone, look at our parents."

"Our parents just married the wrong people that's all. Look at Karen and your dad." I am relieved that he is being much calmer now.

"They will get divorced too."

"No I don't think they will."

"I do. Marriage is such a fucked up concept, hey I sort of like you so let's move in together and sign some paperwork promising to never leave one another, even though we won't stick to it anyway. Why would anyone do that willingly? Why would you want to be tied down to one person forever?"

I am not mentally prepared to process what he has just said to me. He doesn't see a future with me? He is only saying this because he is drunk. Right?

"Do you really want me to go? Is that what you want is to end this now?" I ask, looking straight into his eyes.

He doesn't answer me.

"Hardin?"

"No..fuck.. no Tessa. I love you. I love you so fucking much but you.. what you did was so wrong. You took every single fear that I have and brought them to life in one action." His eyes begin to water and my chest begins to cave in.

"I know I did, I feel terrible for hurting you."

"You should be with someone like Noah."

"I don't want to be with anyone except you." I wipe my eyes.

"I am afraid you will."

"Afraid I will what? Leave you for Noah?"

"Not him exactly, but someone like him."

"I won't. Hardin, I love you. No one else, I love you. I love everything about you, please stop doubting yourself." It hurts me to think that he feels this way.

"Can you honestly tell me that you didn't start seeing me to piss off your mum off?"

"What?"

He waits for an answer.

"No, of course not. My mother has nothing to do with us. I fell in love with you because.. well because I didn't have a choice. I couldn't help it, I tried not to because of what my mother would think but I never had a choice. I have always loved you, whether I wanted to or not." I tell him.

"Sure."

"What can I do to make you see that?"

After everything I have been through for him how could he think me being with him is a way to rebel against my mother?

"Not kiss other guys perhaps."

"I know you are insecure but you should know that I love you. I have fought for you from day one, with my mom, Noah, everyone."

'"Insecure? I am not insecure. I am not going to sit around and be played for a fucking fool."

"You are worried about being played?" I am starting to get angry.

I know what I did was wrong but he has done much worse to me. He really did play me like a fool and I forgave him.

"Don't start that shit with me." He growls.

"We have came such a long way, we have been through so much Hardin. Don't let one mistake take that from us." I never thought I would be the one begging for forgiveness.

"You did it, not me."

"Stop being so cold to me. You have done a lot of things to me too." I snap.

Anger returns to his face and he storms away from me.

"You know what? I have done a lot of things but you kissed someone right in front of me."

"Oh you mean like the night you had Molly on your lap and kissed her in front of me?"

"We weren't together."

"Maybe not to you but I thought we were."

"Doesn't fucking matter Tessa."

"So you are saying that you aren't going to let this go then?"

"I don't know what I am saying but you are getting on my nerves."

"I think you should go to bed." I suggest.

Despite the glimpses of understanding that have appeared in the last few minutes, it is clear that he has his mind set on being cruel.

"I think you shouldn't tell me what to do."

"I know you are angry and hurt but you can't talk to me that way. It's not right and I won't put up with it. Drunk or not."

"I am not hurt." He glares at me.

Hardin and his pride.

"You just said you were."

"No I didn't, don't tell me what I said."

"Okay." I give in.

I am exhausted and I don't want to pull the tab on the grenade that is Hardin. He walks over to the key rack and pulls his keychain off while he stumbles to grab his boots.

"What are you doing?" I rush over to him.

"Leaving, what does it look like?"

"You are not leaving, you have been drinking. A lot." I reach for his keys but he slips them into his pocket.

"I don't give a shit, I need more to drink."

"No! You don't. You had enough and you broke the bottle." I try to reach for his pocket but he grabs ahold of my wrist like has done countless times.

This time is different because he is so angry and for a second I begin to worry.

"Let go." I challenge him.

"Don't try to stop me from leaving and I will let go." He doesn't let up and I try to appear unaffected.

"Hardin.. you are going to hurt me."

His eyes meet mine and he lets go quickly. He raises his hand and I flinch, sinking back away from him. His hand moves to his hair and his eyes flash with panic.

"You thought I was going to hit you?" He nearly whispers and I back away further.

"I..I don't know, you are scaring me." I knew he wouldn't hurt me but this is the easiest way to get him back to reality.

"You should know I wouldn't hurt you." He glares at me.

"For someone who hates your father so much, you sure as hell don't have a problem acting like him." I spit.

"Fuck you, I am nothing like him!" He shouts.

"Yes you are! You're drunk off your ass and you left me at that party! You broke half our decorations in the living room, including my favorite lamp! You are acting like him.. the old him."

"Yeah, well you are acting like your mum too. A spoiled snobby little bitch." He sneers and I gasp.

"Who are you?" I ask and shake my head.

I don't want to hear anymore from him and I know if we continue to argue while is this drunk, it will not end well. I turn to walk away from him. He has taken his disrespect to a whole new level.

"Tessa.. I am .." He begins.

"Don't." I spit and head to the hall.

I can take his rude comments, I can take him yelling at me because hell I dish it out right back to him, but I don't like the way he is behaving tonight and we both need to distance ourselves before one of us says something even worse.

"I didn't mean that." He says and follows me down the hall.

I close the door and lock it behind me. Maybe we can't make this work. Maybe he is too angry and I am too irrational, I push him too far and he does the same to me.

No, that isn't true. We are good for each other because we push each other. Despite all the fights and tension between us, there is passion. So much passion that it nearly drowns me, pulling me under and he is the only light, the only one to save me regardless if he is the one dooming me. I love him more than anything and he does me. No matter what terrible things he said out of anger tonight I know that he does. He has changed so much for me, he is not the same as he was before. He poured his heart into writing me that letter and he is not to blame for this fight tonight.

"Tess, open the door." Hardin taps the wood softly.

"Just go to bed, please." I cry.

"Damn it Tessa! Open this door now, I'm sorry okay?" He shouts and begins to pound at the door.

Praying that he won't bust through the door, I force myself up off the floor and pad over to the dresser to dig through my bottom drawer. When I see the white of the paper relief washes over me and I go into the closet and pull the door closed. As I begin reading, the pounding at the door is drowned out, no longer existing. The ache in my chest dissolves along with my headache. Nothing exists except this letter, these perfect words from my imperfect Hardin.

I read it over and over until my tears stop along with the noise from the hall. I desperately hope that he didn't leave but I am not going out there to find out. My heart and my eyes are too heavy, I need to lay down.

Taking my letter with me, I drag my body to the bed still wearing my dress. Eventually sleep comes to me and I am free to dream of the Hardin that scribbled these words on a blank sheet of paper in a hotel room.

When I wake in the middle of the night, I fold the letter back up and place it back in my bottom drawer before opening the bedroom door. Hardin is asleep in the hallway, curled in a ball on the concrete floor. I don't know whether I should wake him so I leave him alone to sleep off his intoxication.

By the time morning comes I change my clothes, putting on sweats and an old t-shirt of Hardin's. Fighting or not, I earned the right to wear his damn clothes. My nerves are getting the best of me as I walk out of the bedroom. The hallway is empty and the mess in the living room is completely cleared. Not one single piece of glass left on the floor. The room smells of lemons, and the brown whiskey is no longer splattered across the wall. I am surprised Hardin even knew where the cleaner is stored.

"Hardin?" I call, my voice hoarse from all the yelling I did last night.

No answer.

I walk over to the kitchen table and there is an index card with handwriting on it.

"Please don't leave, I will be back soon." He wrote.

The thousand pounds of pressure lifts from my chest and make a cup of coffee and sit down at the table to wait for his return.

(Please vote and comment:) Ily!! This is the last post for a few days, so if you get bored go back and vote for the other chapters  jk ..unless you want to hah. I will be posting on ig and twitter to keep in touch with you guys because I will miss you! My instagram is imaginator1d and twitter is imaginator1dx