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ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING
iii. MIDTOWN JUBILEE

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   RILEY STARK LOOKED NORMAL. She acted normal. She seemed completely normal for the five days that followed. Peter wasn't sure what he did wrong the other day when he brought up the Midtown Jubilee. All he knew for a fact was that he said something to have upset Riley. He couldn't quite see it in her body language, considering Riley was trained to hide her emotions. Instead, he had sensed it. Still, the past was in the past, and now, Riley seemed to be back to normal as far as he could see.

   Contrarily, what he didn't know was that Riley had been in a complete state of frenzy for five days straight.

   Pacing around the condominium she had been living in, Riley continued to fire one question after another. "Is there any way we can soundproof the place before the jubilee tonight?" questioned Riley. "Are you sure there isn't any way for me to leave the city by then? What about the jets?"

   "I'm afraid all of Mr. Stark's private jets are out. Traffic has been backed up since this morning due to a Government official being in the city for the jubilee. Apparently, Senator Collins is alumni to Midtown," explained JOCASTA. "We could try soundproofing the condominium, but it most likely will not be ready by tonight. Maybe you shouldn't have procrastinated this for so long, Miss Valor."

   "I so don't have the patience for your sass right now, JO," grumbled Riley. She ran a hand through her hair. She had been betting on being able to borrow one of her parents' jets to leave Queens for the evening, but that plan turned out to fail. "Is there really no way to get out of here?"

   "I'm afraid you're stuck."

   She groaned irritably. She had five days to prepare for the Midtown Jubilee. She had more than enough time to figure out some way to get out of town or soundproof her home. She couldn't believe she didn't think about if her plan failed. That was one of the first things she learned in her training! Riley had been hoping she could just leave the city for the night, but things didn't seem like they'd be going her way anytime soon.

   The problem wasn't going to the jubilee or avoiding people attending the celebration. As a matter of fact, Riley Stark would have loved to go. It was the first time she'd be able to experience one. The problem at hand was the fact that there were going to be fireworks.

   It was a pipe dream and a widely famous misconception that the Avengers were completely invincible. Sure, they could fight bad guys with just their fists and cool suits alone, but they weren't necessarily indestructible. They all had their share of trauma. Tony Stark dealt with plenty of PTSD and anxiety, as well as Steve Rogers. Bruce Banner struggled with self-hatred because of his creation of the Hulk, and Riley couldn't even begin to list out every trouble Natasha and Thor faced. Point being: every single hero, whether they're just a normal human or an Avenger, faced some sort of trauma.

   Riley, for example, dealt with PTSD for a long time. She blamed being thrown into such a cruel and relentless world at such a young age for this. She never really talked about it, but it was something that was very prevalent in her life. That was why she skipped out on all the pep rallies at school and hated loud noises. Even when the Washington Monument nearly went tumbling down earlier in the school year, she nearly froze up completely due to the explosions occurring all around her. Hell, an explosion was what killed her mother and made Riley an orphan. Explosions, specifically, were never something she could just brush off.

   Riley's PTSD also meant that she really hated things like fireworks.

   She didn't expect Peter to know about it, of course, nor did she expect to react the way she did when she realized there would be fireworks at the Midtown Jubilee. She nearly froze up entirely. Perhaps it was because she knew at that moment that the evening of the jubilee would be a long night for her indeed.

   "Incoming call from Mr. Stark," JOCASTA announced, bringing Riley out of her frantic thoughts. "Would you like to answer the call?"

   "No," immediately answered Riley. "Nope. No way. I cannot talk to him like this, not during his and Pepper's anniversary. I'll... I'll be fine."

   "Declining the call—Oh! Incoming call from Mr. Stark," JOCASTA announced again. "Should I decline the call?"

   "Yes, please," mumbled Riley. She started to walk throughout the condo, searching for a room that was good enough to hide in until the jubilee was over. "JO, if I ever procrastinate something like this again, yell at me please."

   "Will do," said JOCASTA. She paused before announcing for a third time, "Incoming call from Mr. Stark—"

   "Decline it, JO," interrupted Riley. "I have more important things to be worrying—"

   Boom.

   Riley tensed. Her breath was stuck in her throat, her body trembling already. The world was frozen. No, the world hadn't stopped. It was merely moving so fast that everything looked as though it were paused.

   She hurriedly paced toward one of the many windows. Looking out, Riley could spot the park in the distance where the people gathered around for the jubilee. She glimpsed down at the watch on her wrist. 8:03 PM. Was it really time already? Wasn't it a little early to start doing fireworks?

   "I gotta get out of here," she mumbled to herself.

   Boom.

   Riley squeezed her eyes shut, her mind fogging over.

She remembered the first time she was sent out on the field. She was young and hardly had a grip on her powers. She knew how to turn invisible and could somewhat generate forcefields if she focused hard enough. She had absolutely no clue how to use her powers as efficiently as she knew she would in the future, but it certainly was a start as good as any.

She remembered how she felt. She was beyond horrified. She remembered feeling jealous knowing that the other agents that had been recruited at a young age due to parental abandonment or because they were born into this business didn't have to experience things she would have to quite yet. They had time. Most child agents didn't face war and destruction until they were much older, but for Riley O'Dair, she had to start at the age of six-years-old.

She remembered where exactly she was. She was hiding. Explosions occurred all around her on the battlefield and all she could do was hide. She felt weak and insignificant, but she was a child, after all. It was normal for kids to be scared!

She had hidden her shaking body underneath a pile of rubble and kept her eyes shut. She had turned herself invisible, but her whimpering was loud enough to call attention to her.

"Shut up."

Six-year-old Riley opened her eyes to see a red-haired woman crouching in front of her. "W-What?" whimpered Riley. Tears stained her youthful face as she poked her head out.

"I said shut up," repeated the woman, her voice cutting through each word. She shook her head, mumbling to herself, "Unbelievable. When I was her age, I wasn't this weak." The redhead looked back at where she naturally assumed Riley was. "Just stay put while the adults handle this, alright?"

Riley quickly learned, after that day, that this woman was Natasha Romanoff, otherwise known as Black Widow. She also learned that this world was going to have to take getting used to.

The second time Riley saw Natasha was, coincidentally, the second time she was sent out into the field. She was seven-years-old. S.H.I.E.L.D. had thrown Riley back into training for another year to prevent events of the past from happening again in the future. Still, had Natasha's words not offended Riley, causing the Latina to become better out of spite, there was a high chance that Valor wouldn't have faced the world again until she was much, much older.

Riley and Natasha continued to meet through the same unusual situations. Riley would always break down sobbing due to her undying trepidation. The destruction and explosions were what always got her. Sure, each time she went out, she was slightly less scared, but it was still there regardless. And every time, Natasha would blatantly judge her for being unable to handle herself, not realizing that Riley was a child that was definitely nothing like Natasha was when she was the same age.

It wasn't until Riley was eight-years-old when she finally got Natasha to stop despising her, even if it was just a little bit. Riley being able to hold her own for once impressed Natasha and resulted in Valor being trained by Black Widow herself. It was how they became so close to the point that Riley considered Natasha her family.

Still, Riley O'Dair would never forget the boom-boom-booms that kicked off their relationship from the start.

   JOCASTA's voice was what brought Riley back. "Miss Valor? Are you alright? Would you like me to call Mr. Stark? Or would you prefer Miss Potts?" 

   Riley slowly blinked twice, temporarily returning to reality. She reached up toward her head as it started to ache. "JO, the episodes..." started Riley, sounding almost far-off. "The episodes are starting."

  "Perhaps I should call—"

   "No, I can... I can handle this," Riley said, stumbling toward the couch. "I'm positive—"

  Boom.

   With the blink of an eye, Riley Stark was in an entirely different universe.

The fight that traumatized Riley O'Dair the most was the attack on New York in 2012. She was 11-years-old, a little bit stronger, a bit tougher, but still that same little girl she was before. The only difference was that Riley, who had taken a distinct liking toward a man called Tony Stark, hid her fear with sarcastic remarks and poorly timed humor.

The majority of the time, Riley was very mature and serious. The other agents liked to claim that Tony Stark tainted the girl, but Riley O'Dair didn't care. She adored Tony Stark, as well as the other newly assembled Avengers.

She had been in charge of defense rather than offense when it came to the attack on New York because of her ability to create forcefields; however, when a shit ton of Chitauri aliens are coming at you, you find that you don't really get a choice in the matter.

With a shriek, Riley created a forcefield when one of the Chitauri army shot its gun at her. She rolled off to the side when it ran at her, swinging its gun blindly. Riley turned invisible, ran up behind it, and killed it in one full swing.

"Take that, you ugly booger!" Riley yelled. She made a face at the goopy texture of the deceased alien. "Jesus fucking Christ, these things are gross."

"Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" Clint asked Riley through his earpiece.

Riley, without missing a beat, answered, "Well, my mom's dead, so I don't think I do."

"Lord, Stark, you've really tainted the poor child," Steve's voice came in next.

She laughed as she bolted to protect the escaping civilians. A forcefield appeared before them. She tried not to flinch every time she heard a building fall apart, another explosion, and anything that so much as went:

Boom, boom, boom...

Each one caused Riley to tense up. She had always reacted this way due to her manifesting and worsening PTSD, but after the attack on New York, Riley O'Dair was never quite the same again.

   "Uh, you said your name's J... JOCASTA, right? What should I... What should I be doing? Hey, wait, do you happen to know Karen?"

  "Karen?"

   "The voice thingy in my suit. It's what I call her," a squeaky voice explained. "Ah, never mind. Anyways, what exactly should I be doing?"

   Riley's eyebrows furrowed as she snapped back into reality. The voices she had been hearing sounded so far away when they were actually a lot closer than she realized. She looked up from where she had been laying on the couch with her hand violently gripping the pillow next to her.

   She looked up, puzzled. She recognized JOCASTA's voice, but who was the other one? Wait... She knew that voice anywhere.

   "Peter...?" She stared at the boy. "What are you, what are you doing here?"

   Peter flashed Riley one of his award-winning smiles. "Mr. Stark called me," he explained. "He sounded real worried about you. He kept saying something about how the fireworks are really triggering for you."

   Taking this in, she mumbled, "And he didn't want me to be left alone."

   "Uh-huh."

   Riley pressed her lips into a line. "How long have you been here?" She looked down at her watch. 9:06 PM.

   "Uh... about 15 minutes. The fireworks show is halfway done," Peter explained. "When I came in, you were in the middle of an... uh, I forget how Mr. Stark described it. He sounded too frantic for me to understand him properly."

   "Episodes," Riley started, "That's what I've always called them." She rubbed the back of her head, standing up slowly. "Everyone deals with their traumas differently. I have episodes." She wandered into the kitchen to retrieve a glass of water. Peter followed shortly behind her. "Sometimes I get violent, other times I just freeze up. The violent part is only ever preferable when I'm in a fight."

   Peter rubbed the back of his head as Riley took a long sip of water. Her head was pounding. "You know, you could've told me you had PTSD, Ri," Peter pointed out. "I mean... I sorta knew a little bit about it because of everything Karen's told me, but... you know what I mean."

   "Well, you found out, didn't you?" Riley dryly replied. She sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm not exactly pleasant when I'm like this."

   "That's okay!" Peter optimistically told her. "I just wanna make sure I can be here for you."

   She bit back a smile at the kindness Peter was showing her. "I appreciate the thought, but I can handle..." She couldn't lie to herself like that. "I can sorta handle myself."

   He followed Riley back into the living room. "Are you sure? Because I don't think you're sure," opinionated Peter. "Mr. Stark explicitly said that you shouldn't be alone when you're having these episodes." He paused. "You should've told him about the jubilee. He said he had to find out from Happy. Mr. Hogan tried to come up here, but the traffic wasn't letting up... so he called in his favorite neighborhood spider."

   A sigh left her. She wanted to be alone. She didn't want anyone, not even Peter, to see her in such a vulnerable state. It just reminded her of the first time she went out on the battlefield. All she wanted to do was be alone; however, she knew... well, everyone knew that this was certainly not one of Riley's better ideas. Somehow, she was glad Tony recognized that. She was even more glad that out of everyone he could've called, he called Peter.

   "Alright, alright." She sank down on the floor. She pressed her back against the couch behind her. "Fine. You really wanna help?" Peter nodded. "Just... talk to me."

   "Talk to you?" repeated Peter, sitting on the floor next to her.

   "Mhm." She hugged her knees, resting her chin on them. She was still extremely tense. "Sometimes I blast music to help me distract myself, but it doesn't always work. I'm always trying to figure out different ways to control my episodes." Peter nodded at this. "So... um, did you really leave the jubilee just to come here?"

   "Duh," answered Peter. "Don't make it sound like such a bad thing, Ghostie. It's no big deal. It's not like I'm dying anytime soon. We'll just go to the next one in 25 years. Besides, as a wise friend of mine once told me, 'You're apart of the village now, and I would do anything for the people in that village.' Well, it goes both ways. Whatever you need, I'm on it."

   Riley hummed. "And if I asked you to hack into the Pentagon for me?"

   "I'd do it and then tell you that you need to find new hobbies."

   Riley couldn't help but laugh at his response. It was nice. Laughing really did make her feel just a bit better than before. Now that she was thinking about it, she was never not laughing or smiling when she was with him.

   For the hours that followed, Peter Parker and Riley Stark talked and talked and talked. It seemed that all they could really do was talk. Riley talked about her life as an Avenger and stories she never got around to telling Peter. They talked about their wildest dreams and conspiracy theories about the most random things.

   It seemed that all they could do was talk, and, frankly, it was calming for Riley.

   Whenever they heard another firework go off, Peter would patiently sit beside Riley and simply observe her. He would notice how tense she became. It was as if she had turned into a statue of some sort. Her muscles would tense, her eyes would widen like a deer in headlights would, and she would sit unbelievably still as she went through one of her episodes. Peter was just glad these episodes weren't the violent ones Riley had mentioned before.

   What had been bothering him was the fact that she had hid yet another important fact about herself. Why? Did she not trust him? It didn't make sense. They had known each other and been friends for nearly an entire year, yet she was still hiding things from him. Why?

   Was Riley scared of opening up to people? Was she afraid of scaring people away? It made sense to Peter. He had listened to all of her late-night rambles very carefully. It was certainly plausible. However, what bothered him the most was the fact that she could actually think that she could scare him off.

   Pulling a blanket off of the couch and placing it over Riley, Peter knew one thing and one thing for sure.

   He wasn't going anywhere.