"Tell me and I'll do it," I place my hands on her cheeks. She lifts one hand up and shows me the palm of it. "You have to pay for it, to the proper senses of the words."

"How much?" I don't refuse since it's my fault but she just smiles and shakes her head. "I was just joking..." she tries to move away but I wrap my arm around her waist and take some of the money bills I put every morning in my pocket. "Here," I hold them in front of her face.

"Well..." she stares at the fifty dollars I just got out of my jacket. "I was just joking but..." her happiness comes back and she grabs everything with no second thought. "Ah, there I see the happy girl," I chuckle but follow her outside of the building. "That's your fault."

"What do you always ask for money though?" I catch up with her small and slow steps as she's putting the money in the pocket of her cute pink faux fur coat. That's the first time I see her in it, that suits her. "Because...I have nothing..."

"You have nothing? What does that mean?" I bring my hand up to her coat, touching it but loving the fluffiness of it. "Yeah. I don't have money so...yeah..." she doesn't answer me clearly but her voice and expression reveal some shame as if she was embarrassed about it. We both sit down on our bench but I place my bag over my lap to take something out. "I can give you as much money as you need or want."

"No...cause if we ever fight...you're going to throw this back at my face and make me feel bad..." she speaks in a quieter voice and keeps her eyes on the students. "We won't fight again and even if we ever do, I'm not the type of person who uses some past words or actions against someone," I take the lollipop out of my bag to hand it to her. She takes as if this was normal between us and removes the wrapping to shove the candy in her mouth. Big as she asked for.

I keep on looking at her features with more attention but notice something different. I lean over her as this thing got me curious but I fix my eyes on her lips. "What have you done to your lips?" I point at them with some amusement at the sight of those. "Don't mention it please, I don't know what happened but they're swollen since I woke up..."

I smirk but keep quiet about it. "Are you sure you don't know what happened?" I let it out without being able to shut my mouth. "Yes. How would I know when I haven't done anything?"

My smug smile doesn't fade but I keep on staring at her while she's sucking on the lollipop as innocently as possible. I know she knows I'm watching, she's softly blushing. "You know what can make those lips swollen?" I bite my own ones but think about too many lewd things that are only happening in my head. I'm imagining her doing some pleasuring things to me right now but I need to stop this immediately. While I'm trying to conceal my smirk full of dirtiness, her eyes give me a judging look. "No, and I don't want to know."

"Come on," I put my arm around her neck and draw her closer to me, to take this opportunity and caress her fluffy coat. "I want to say it in your ear."

"No," she giggles but shakes her head like an adorable baby, staying in my arms without complaining or trying to get away. "You liked it when I whispered in your ear the other day, I know you're a dirty girl."

"That's not true...I'm innocent..." she tells me lies to pretend to be a pure child with holy thoughts when I know this is the whole opposite. "Oh no, you're not," I state the facts but boop her nose, my other hand enjoying the material of her coat uncontrollably. "How do you know that?"

"I know it, that's all," I shrug but never cease what I'm doing with my fingers running over the fake fur. She gazes up at me but pulls her lollipop out. "You know when a girl is innocent or not?" her eyebrows raise as she seems to not believe me.

"Of course I do," I nod with no hint of hesitation. "I can feel it in the way she touches me or talks about sex, that's easy to know whether she's still pure or not."

"Well..." I get her to be speechless, her candy going back inside her mouth shyly. "I didn't know it was possible."

"Look at you," I give a squeeze to her shoulder. "You're the definition of purity, but only 'physically' if you know what I mean because your mind isn't pure at all."

"Stop reminding me of it..." she pouts as if this was bad but I correct that idiocy right away. "What? Isn't it good to be a virgin?"

My poor self receives her piercing stare. "No, it's not...people keep saying it's ridiculous to still be a virgin at my age...I'm soon eighteen..." the look on her face shows some cute embarrassment about it when I completely don't think the same way. "Wait- I can't believe I'm gonna have this type of conversation with you but what the hell is ridiculous about it? That just means you're a good girl, what's wrong?"

"Being a bad girl is better," she surprises me with her reply I wouldn't have expected to hear from her. "Let me tell you that most of the guys like a virgin girl 'cause you know how we are, it boosts our ego when we make a girl feel extreme pleasure like she never did before and taking a girl's virginity is something that men like a lot since it's often something important for you all."

"But I want to lose it...I feel like...I don't care if it's just a boy I'm not particularly in love with but...at the same time, I want to because I feel like I'll regret it...I don't know..." she lets some of her feelings leave her to talk about it with me. I like this thing for some reason. "Don't do it with someone you don't love or you'll regret it. Trust me," I heave my foot up to the bench to place it right next to me but put the bottom of my trousers properly.

"Trust you? Why?" she lays her eyes on me. "Do you regret it?" she guesses the reason why I tell her this. "To be honest...I don't really care but I only had my first time because of the other guys who were making me feel ridiculous as a boy...I wasn't even in love with that girl and she wasn't either but I just didn't want to be a virgin anymore to be a proud dumbass in front of others," I fiddle with my trousers without changing of position. "I was even more proud after what the girl said but...yeah...I kind of regret the way it happened..."

"What did she say?" she gets curious about it when I thought she would want to put an end to this conversation. I lean over her to be a bit more comfortable and have my arm right next to her thigh but keep my foot on the flat surface to toy with my fabrics. "She said I'm thick and that I was good as fuck but she said that to her friends and then my own friends got to know about it and told me but she was seventeen when I was only fifteen...so...you can imagine how big-headed I was about it. That just started to be a bit annoying at some point..."

"About what?" she asks to know more while I can still recall everything. "About the fact that each girl I had sex with couldn't shut their fucking mouth and keep to themselves what they think about my dick. I know you all have something with big ones but even if we like to hear you all talking about it like horny girls, this is annoying to hear the same things coming from different girls over and over again. Some of them literally wished to be in my bed for one night just because of that when I just wanted to have a girlfriend who would love me sincerely."

"So...you lost your virginity when you were fifteen...?" she lets some shock exude through her words. "That's a bit young though..."

"That's very young," I tell her the truth with no shame since I know I was a jerk back then. "Having sex at fifteen is honestly stupid. I only wanted to impress the guys around me but people should wait to be at least eighteen and have someone they love to do it, especially girls. I can't believe that twelve or fourteen years old girl have sex...that's so wrong...and I say that because a girl can get pregnant which cannot happen to a guy."

"Yeah...that's true..." she nods to agree with me. "But when you love someone and that you're not a kid anymore...it's fine...you protect yourself and if a pregnancy ever happens because it can...it's hard to handle at first but it's okay if both love each other and that they're at least eighteen..."

"Yeah..." I acquiesce, wondering what I could say given the things going on in my head. "And honestly...when you love someone...who waits to be a certain age nowadays when you really want to do it with the one you love...? As long as you're not kids, it's fine."

"Do you think it's wrong to like older men?" she suddenly asks from out of nowhere but I look up at her from very close, feeling the fluffiness of her coat tickling my skin. "You like older men?" I smile but tease her about it. "Maybe..."

"Hm. Maybe. Sure," I chuckle but bend my head back to rest it on the bench and still gaze at her. "I just like men in their thirties or forties because they're more mature and look...manlier...in some ways. Just like some actors, like the one I talked about in a presentation...that's totally the type of man I would want...dammit...I like them more than young actors...I don't know why...I'm weird."

"You're not weird, that's pretty common for a girl like you to prefer older men but..." l like my lips before telling the ugly truth. "The problem is on the man's point of view. Being forty years old or thirty and getting with a seventeen years old girl is a bit...odd...you know...A virgin, seventeen years old girl attracting an old man, that sounds weird."

"Not necessarily attract but...you can fall in love with a person and not only sexually...no?" she purses her lips as she seems to be a bit disappointed by my opinion. "Well...I think there must be something going on with him to fall in love with a teenager but this can happen, I'm not saying this is only sexual but in most cases, they just want a sugar baby..."

"What if I want a sugar daddy...?" she mumbles but gets my heart to jump out of my chest. "You- Ya. No sugar daddy for you bad girl."

"Why?" she giggles but looks at me. "What's wrong about it? I could have someone who cares for me, gives me all his attention and pays me in return for what I give him...that's great."

"No that's not. If you want a sugar daddy, I'm here," I smirk but earn a stare from her eyes. "You're not old enough and...you already have enough of sex with other girls so no thanks."

Again. I'm considered as a damn playboy with no heart. "Stop saying that shit...I don't have sex for fun and I only do it when I have a girlfriend. The only time that I did it without any feelings was when I was fifteen for my first time and once with a guy but then I grew up, I started to have girlfriends and I was doing it less often to show I'm serious with a girl but see where this shit got me? Now I'm just a dumbass that bitches dump with no regret."

"You sound like someone I hate...I'm pretty sure you're playing it the victim with exes that are the problem only when you're the one at fault..." she raises her eyebrows but mentions something I never heard. "No. I'm serious. I never cheat, I never look at another girl when I'm in a relationship and the only reason that my exes gave me when they left me was that I was too clingy, not manly enough outside of the bed and too childish because of my jealousy or love. I'm not the type of guy to act like a victim if I do something bad or wrong."

"They left you because of things like that?" she glances at me to show some astonishment while keeping the lollipop in her mouth. "Are you sure the problem wasn't the girls you were picking?"

"That is exactly what I've been thinking since then," I scoff with bitterness in my throat but deviate my eyes somewhere else. "Have you already got a boyfriend though? Since you told me I sound like someone you hate."

"I don't even want to call him an ex. He was nothing but just trash and I should never have let him use me..." she expresses her emotions for the first time to me. I honestly thought she never had a boyfriend. "He kept on making me believe in something he knew would not happen and lied to me while he was still in love with his ex he was always calling a bitch. I trusted him but I shouldn't have. He was even getting mad at me when I was complaining about the fact that he wasn't even texting me once when his ex was talking to him and that it was making him feel sad. I remember once, he didn't talk to me for a whole day and when I finally got him to tell me the truth since he pretended there was nothing wrong, he said he just received a text from his ex and had to sleep thorough the day because he wasn't feeling good afterwards when I fucking saw him playing nonstop on the damn PS4 with his friends. On that day, I stopped believing him for good and I gave up. He kept on talking about his exes all the time and I never said anything cause I was scared to be the one overreacting but when you like someone and see he only wants someone to comfort him and nothing else, you can't take it no more..."

"You did well, weak guys like that who can't let go of their fucking exes are a waste of time. They make you believe they're over it but they're just using you to not feel alone," I totally feel the same way than she does about this. "Did you break up with him though?"

"No...he's the one who told me in a last message that he was lost and needed time and that he didn't want to lose me but...he made me cry just the day before then we made up and he was sending some texts as if nothing had happened but he did this shit again to me on that day so...I was so done with it that I just left without saying anything...I never answered but I cried for days...that was the first guy I trusted and...I was just dumb 'cause I was always there for him even when he was telling me that he wasn't feeling good because of his ex...I was too naive..." her voice sounds more sorrowful but breaks my heart to hear it. I don't like to know this baby was played with. "Does this guy leaves nearby? 'Cause I want to beat the shit out of him right now."

"No..." she shakes her head but smiles. "I'm trying to forget that and not think about it anymore now. The more I recall the thing he told me and the more this hurts so...yeah...let's stop talking about it..." she gazes down but since I cannot bear this sadness on her face, I straighten up and get my foot back on the ground to put my arms around her body and press my lips on her cheek. "My poor little girl..." I peck her cheekbone but caress her arm again, only to play with her fake fur. "If a boy hurts you again, tell me and I'll destroy his face. Alright?"

"Hm..." she doesn't look up but only blushes while sucking her candy. I run my fingers through her hair but cannot help smiling. "You're not in love with anyone now, are you?"

"Maybe..." her answer tells me yes. "Are you?" she returns the question but I shake my head. "I'm not. Does that boy love you back though? Because that's the most important," I slide my hand down to her ear, toying with her earring but keeping my eyes fixed on her. She shakes her head, making me feel a bit hurt by this answer. Loving someone but not being loved back is painful as hell. I'm thinking about Jisung now, I wonder if he's the one she likes. "Who is it?"

"You don't know him..." she replies in a monotone but gazes up. "Anyway...Jisung is here, I need to talk to him..." she changes of behavior in a sudden and grabs hold of her bag to stand up. She leaves me without telling me more or giving me the time to say something. This leaves me cold.

There's something obvious that she just set in my mind. The more I think about it, the more it's evident that I know the guy she likes, I know him very well.