Chapter 29

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

Rien immediately went to the employee's area to gather his things. Nilingon n'ya ang direksyon ko at iminuwestra na sumunod ako sa kan'ya. In my drunken state, I nodded slowly and followed him. I feel like throwing up; I usually just feel like this when I'm in a car, pero mas malala yata ang pagbaliktad ng sikmura ko ngayon.

When I followed Rien to the employee's area, nakita ko na may kwarto pala siya roon. Iba ito sa stock room nila. . .they had their own quarters, it was probably a resting place for them if they're too tired to go home. It made me think that Eastre is a good employer.

There were other rooms inside the employee's area, pero pumasok lang ako roon sa kwarto ni Rien. It was spacious enough for three people, it had white walls and a ceramic material for the flooring. Ang kama n'ya ay queen-sized na may makapal at mukhang malamig sa balat pa na comforter.

Is this really an employee's resting area or a whole hotel room? Hiring pa ba ang East Drive? Parang gusto kong mag-apply kahit waitress man lang! I could save a lot of money if I had a resting place this comfortable and big.

Medyo naniningkit na ang mga mata ko. I really feel like throwing up. . .at nahihilo na talaga ako. I already feel hot all over, I want to. . .rest already.

Humiga ako sa kama ni Rien, and even when the air conditioner was on, I felt my skin scorching from the effect of the liquor. Nilasap ko ang lambot ng kama n'ya habang pumipintig ang ulo.

"Nacia. . ." a baritone voice called me. "Uuwi ka na rin ba?"

"Nakauwi na ako," I answered back.

"This isn't your room."

"Mas maganda 'to sa kwarto ko," sagot ko sa kan'ya. "Ikaw na lang matulog sa kwarto ko. Maliit lang 'yon; pang-isang tao lang pero maganda naman ang foam."

He chuckled lightly. "Is this the first time you drank this much?"

Unti-unti akong tumango, pinapakiramdaman ang unti-unting paglagay n'ya sa akin ng kumot.

Tinanggal ko yung kumot dahil naiinitan talaga ako. I was scratching my skin and I could feel my throat burning up. Lalo akong nairita. I wanted to feel my own skin but it feels like my body is no longer with me. My sight is fragmented, I could only hear noises.

Sa sobrang irita ko ay unti-unti kong nilagas ang sarili kong pananamit. It was easy because I took off my black blazer first then proceeded with my dress but I was stopped mid-way because of Rien.

"What the fuck—" Rien's voice came nagging in my ears. "Anong ginagawa mo?!"

"Ang init!"

"Bakit ka naghuhubad?!" He sounded like he was panicking.

"Ang init nga!" ulit ko at unti-unting naluluha na ang mga mata sa sobrang irita sa nararamdaman ng aking katawan, I feel like being bathe in sunlight!

"Fuck," Rien immediately turned off the lights. "Shit."

"Why?" I drawled.

"Anong ininom mo?" He sounded like he was about to reprimand me.

"Si Cardi B!" sagot ko at natawa.

"What?"

"My favorite writer. . .is Cardi B," I nodded and stared at him. "Her lyrics? It's magical, it's sensational, and it's a game changer. She changed my life and made me realize that sometimes all you need is to wap."

"Nacia?" aniya na tila hindi makapaniwala.

I laughed louder and started to rap off-sync. "I said certified freak, seven days a week, wet ass pussy, make that pullout game weak, woo!"

"What the fuck. . ." Rien widened his eyes as his lips parted. "Diyos ko po. . ."

"I love Cardi B. . .so much," naiiyak kong saad. "Cardi B please go home, iwan mo na ang Palawan. . .come back to me."

"Tangina talaga ni Ryou," he sighed and I saw him muttering another curse. "And you took it without thinking twice?"

Tumango ako. I love you, Cardi B!

Rien's voice came off as more commanding. "Whenever you drink something, ask someone first, someone close to you, kung anong tama n'on. Bacardi is too strong, you should have opted for a mild drink."

"I have no one to ask. . ." my voice slurred.

Rien tsk-ed at me. "You have a bartender. . .who's currently your friend. Hindi naman malayo ang agwat natin kanina."

We're friends?

Napangiti naman ako. Wow, I have a best-selling author as a friend. A legit one. Hindi tulad ko na bestseller lang dahil pinapaubos na ang mga libro ko.

I heard ice clinking inside against a glass. Unti-unti kong dinilat ang mga mata ko at naramdaman ko na inangat ni Rien yung kumot patungo sa aking balikat.

"Open your mouth, Nacia," utos n'ya sa akin.

I slightly widened the airway of my mouth and I found myself following his lead.

Naramdaman ko ang malamig na yelo sa dulo ng aking dila. Somehow, it relieved the heat that I was feeling. The coldness of the ice slowly helped to ease my discomfort.

"Suck on it," he commanded and gently picked a towel to wipe his hand. "It'll help you feel cool for a while."

I really did play with the ice on my tongue. Unti-unti ako nakaramdam ng ginhawa. I can't believe it. . .ilang lasing na kaya ang inalagaan ni Rien? He knows how to take care of them. . .of me.

"Busy ka. . ." I muttered after feeling cool.

"I would have come to you if you asked me to. . ." sagot n'ya sa akin. "Hinihintay lang kitang magsalita na gusto mo na umuwi."

"You would ditch your work. . .for me?" Halakhak ko.

Rien's silence stretched over my laughter. Bago siya unti-unting napabuntonghininga.

"Sana umuwi na si Kiran mula sa Palawan," aniya.

Suminghap ako. I love you, Palawan!

"Why? You miss him?" tukso ko sa kan'ya. I feel my cheeks warming. "I miss my Kiran too. I miss Palawan."

"Nakapunta ka na ng Palawan??" he asked.

Umiling ako. "Hindi pa."

"Lasing ka nga," halakhak n'ya.

"Bakit mo. . .gusto umuwi na si Kiran?" I asked, still dazed. Kaagaw ko ba siya kay Kiran? Ang pogi naman ni Kiran. . .dami kong kaagaw sa kan'ya.

I love you, Kiran. . .

"Baka kasi wala na siyang ma-uwian," Rien uttered meaningfully. "Kung patuloy mo akong sinusubukan nang ganito."

I was about to answer something but my skin radiate more heat, kaya halos ma-iyak ako sa sobrang init.

"Rien," I cried as soon as I felt like my whole body was burning. "It's so hot."

"Tanginang bacardi 'yan," Rien cussed and I could hear the frustration in his voice. "That's a strong drink. . .and you downed it like you're not even scared of being tipsy."

"I felt liberated," tawa ko kahit mangiyak-ngiyak na. "Because for the first time? I get to make decisions that won't affect other people. . .I get to drink because. . .I can? And people won't. . .make me feel shit for it."

Natahimik si Rien. But he sighed and I saw his shadow move. "Para kang bata na ngayon lang nakatikim ng alak."

"I don't drink."

"Obvious," Rien spat out. "Walang taong kakaibiganin ang bacardi. Ikaw lang yata ang ginawa pang ka-talking stage yung alak na 'yon."

I easily took off the dress and sighed in relief. I finally felt comfortable. Dahan-dahan kong naramdaman na lumalakas yung aircon. Nakapikit ako at madilim ang paligid kaya wala akong makita. Yet, I heard some buttons being pressed so I guess Rien changed the temperature of the room to make it cooler.

"I'll get you some water. . .and cold compress," mahinang sambit ni Rien. Unti-unti kong dinilat ang mga mata ko kahit pilit na pumipikit ang mga talukap nito.

He was facing the door, as if he never looked in my direction. His huge frame carefully opened the door as if he's trying not to let anyone see my state.

Tuluyan na akong nagpahele sa antok at pagkalasing. The scorching feeling was slowly doused off as I felt someone dabbing a cool towel over my face.

Nagising na lang ako na iba ang t-shirt na suot. I slowly gathered my hair in a bun and looked around. I saw a basin on my side, with a towel swimming in the middle of it. May isang pitcher din doon ng tubig at isang timba na mukhang p'wede kong sukahan kung sakali.

Tumayo na ako nagunat-unat. My head was still spinning and I was flinching as I tread my steps carefully. Lumabas na ako at muli akong namutla nang maalala ang mga nagawa ko kagabi. I wished it was a total blacked out for me; sana ngayon na lang ako naging invisible!

Dahan-dahan pa akong lumabas dahil hindi ko alam kung sino ang bubungad sa akin. Yet, as soon as I opened the door, I could feel someone's stare on me. Nilingon ko ito at nakita si Rien na nagaayos ng mga baso at nasa bartender's counter na ulit.

His eyes pierced through me. Napalunok naman ako dahil alam ko na malaki ang kasalanan ko sa kan'ya dahil imbis na makapagpahinga siya ay parang naperwisyo ko pa yata siya. Eastre wasn't around the area, it was only Rien and the relaxing music that's currently playing in the background.

Sarado na ang East Drive dahil halos tanghali na pala. Ngayon ko lang napansin na malaki pala talaga ang buong lugar, and now that I'm scanning the area, I feel like cleaning this every day is quite tiring. Kaya siguro sa gabi lang ito nagbubukas dahil halos kalahati ng araw ay nililinis ito.

Tumikhim ako at unti-unting umupo sa isa sa mga stool. Nakayuko lang ako habang pinaglalaruan ang dulo ng t-shirt na suot ko. The clothes fit me perfectly. Hindi rin panglalaki kaya gusto kong malaman kung nanghiram pa ba sila ng damit o bumili, kung bili man ito ay babayaran ko na lang.

"Jazmine was the one who helped you changed clothes," sabi ni Rien na tila ba nabasa ang nasa isip ko.

Umangat ang tingin ko sa kan'ya. "Jazmine?"

"Si Jaz, isa sa mga kapalitan ko na bartender rito. She's a woman, so you don't have to worry. Kakauwi lang n'ya kanina."

"Ah. . .pakisabi thank you," mahinang sambit ko at nahihiyang pinantayan ang titig ni Rien. "Thank you rin sa pag-asikaso sa akin kagabi."

Huminto si Rien sa pagpupunas ng mga baso. He eyed me suspiciously, I could feel that he wanted to reprimand me but he's choosing not to. Mukhang malalim din ang iniisip n'ya dahil malayo ang tingin n'ya habang nagaayos sa likod ng counter.

"Kapag iinom ka sa susunod, dapat kung anong kaya lang ng katawan mo," sabi ni Rien at binaba ang mga baso, "and drink only when someone can help. . .to take care of you. Halata na kapag pinabayaan ka lang ay magigising ka na lang na lumalangoy sa sarili mong suka kinabukasan."

My whole face blanched as I imagined it. Gano'n ba ako ka-alaga-in kapag nalalasing? Well, to be fair, hindi naman talaga ako mahilig uminom at nadala lang ako ng tukso kagabi. I never thought that I'll be enjoying it as well. Kung umiinom naman kasi ako ay palagi kong kasama sina Ruby at Mineth, kagabi lang yata ang unang beses na uminom ako na hindi sila ang kasama.

"Sorry," I said, shame slowly engulfing me.

Umiling si Rien. "Bakit ka nags-sorry? Hindi ka naman naging abala. Pumayag din naman ako na isama ka kagabi kaya. . .I'm partly responsible of you."

Muling umangat ang tingin ko sa kan'ya. "Kanino pala itong damit? Babayaran ko na lang o isasauli."

"Okay na 'yan, huwag mo na isipin," wika n'ya at lumingon sa akin. "Tinupi ko na rin ang mga damit mo at nilagay sa isang paperbag. Kunin mo na lang mamaya."

I bit my lower lip. "I'm really sorry."

"Okay nga lang. . .just don't drink when I'm not around," he said, and his lips jutted a bit. "You're pretty handful. . .but quite funny when you're drunk."

I looked away as the embarrassment stayed on my cheeks. "Nakakahiya."

"Kaibigan mo kagabi si Cardi B. . ." halakhak n'ya.

Oh my god.

"Certified freak," Rien grinned, at napailing.

My cheeks felt warm as I shook my head. Hindi ko naaalala ang lahat kaya nahihiya ako kung anu-ano siguro ang pinagsasabi ko sa kan'ya. I was hoping that I wasn't as talkative last night. Pero mukhang marami akong nasabi!

"Uuwi na ako mamaya sa bahay. . ." he drawled then slowly looked at me. "Magluluto ako ng sabaw. Kung gusto mo sumama. . .p'wede naman. Pero p'wede rin naman kitang ihatid na lang sa inyo."

I blinked before deciding to settle with a nod. Nakakahiya naman tanggihan dahil mukhang may concern talaga siya sa akin. And besides, I feel like I need a good soup. Tumatalbog pa rin ang ulo ko hanggang ngayon. I doubt that I'll want another round with Cardi B.

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

I thought Rien would settle with a condominium since he works at a bar, malapit din sa BGC ang East Drive kaya naman nagulat ako nang dalhin n'ya ako sa loob ng isang subdivision. Pinarada n'ya sa isang lumang bahay ang kan'yang motor at agad naman akong bumaba nang mapagtantuan na nasa bahay na n'ya kami.

The house was two-storey with huge capiz windows, the whole structure was made with sturdy narra and it greatly reflected an old mansion during the spanish era. Hindi ko inakala na ganito ang bahay ni Rien. He seems to be. . .high maintenance but I never thought he would be a fan of antiques. There were intricate designs on the railings, kaya naman lalo akong namangha.

"La, nakauwi na po ako," sigaw ni Rien mula sa labas.

Unti-unting may sumilip na matanda sa malalaking bintana ng bahay na ito. I looked around and spotted a small garden, with a functioning fountain. Buhay na buhay ang mga halaman dito.

"Bakit di ka nakauwi kagabi, Cio? May nangyari ba?" nagaalalang bumaba mg hagdanan ang isang ginang. Her head had a crown of age, white strands peeking through some of the healthy black hair flowing down her shoulders.

"May sinamahan lang po," sagot ni Rien sabay tingin sa akin. "Si Nacia po pala, Lola."

Ngumiti sa akin ang Lola ni Rien. "Lola Marienne na lang, hija. Kumain na ba kayo? Nilabas ko na ang baboy. Magsisinigang ka ba, Cio?"

"Sana po," sagot ni Rien. Lumingon sa akin ang kan'yang mga mata. "Akyat ka muna."

Tumango ako at nagmano kay Lola Marienne. "Pasensya na po at wala po akong dala. Sa susunod ko na lang po na pagbisita."

Ngumiti siya sa akin nang may galak. "Nakakatuwa naman na may bibisita na sa akin bukod kay Cio! Nakakasawa rin kasi ang mukha ng kalbo na 'yan."

"Hindi ako kalbo." Kumunot ang noo ni Rien.

Lola Marienne pursed her lips. "Edi ano ang tawag sa buhok mo? Baby hair?"

Umirap si Rien pero may munting ngiti sa labi. Napangiti naman ako sa sinabi ni Lola Marienne. She seemed nice and friendly. Hindi halata sa mukha n'ya ang kan'yang edad.

I've learned that she was already 70 years old. Habang nasa kusina si Rien ay kinausap n'ya ako nang kinausap. We went through their sala and saw that even their furniture were old, gawa sa kahoy na may malambot na kutson lamang. Ang tanging medyo bago ay yung flat-screen na TV.

"Maraming kwarto ang nandito. . .pero walang mga tao dahil kaming dalawa lang naman ni Cio ang tumitira," sabi ni Lola Marienne. "Ayaw naman ni Cio mag-asawa pa kaya minsan ay labis ang lungkot ko."

"Bata pa po si Cio," sabi ko kay Lola Marienne. "Saka. . .mahirap ang mag-anak ngayon, Lola."

"Aanuhin n'ya ang malaking kinikita n'ya kung di naman siya magaasawa?" Lola Marienne sighed. "Sabi ko nga sa kan'ya. . .kahit iwan na n'ya ako, basta bumuo na siya ng buhay na ang iniisip naman n'ya ay sarili n'ya. Ewan ko ba sa batang 'yan, maagang naging matanda."

Nilibot ko ang paningin ko at napagtantuan na ganito rin ang gusto kong bahay kung sakali. It was peaceful. . .and had a sense of being a home to a person. Hindi tulad ng bahay ng mga Conjuanco na sobrang laki pero sobrang lungkot.

It made me think of Kiran. Kung di siguro. . .kung wala siguro ang papa n'ya; bumubuo na kaya kami ng pamilya? Will we live in a condo? Or a peaceful home like this one?

Sa sala ay maraming pinakita na mga larawan si Lola, may mga photo album siya pero halos silang dalawa lang ni Rien ang magkasama sa mga larawan. My eyes were glued to a picture of Rien in his college days. Compared to Kiran's visuals, Rien looked more manly. His features were sharp but there's always a hint of warmth in his small grin. Hindi tulad ni Kiran na mahirap pangitiin.

Dumating na ang tanghalian at tumulong ako na maghain ng hapagkainan. Halos mamahalin ang mga gamit nilang plato, kaya naman ingat na ingat ako. Rien carefully placed the bowl of soup on the table and glanced at my way.

"Thank you," sabi n'ya sa akin. "Kahit ako na sana d'yan."

"Ikaw na nagluto eh," sabi ko at napakamot ng noo. "Saka, ito lang yata ang ambag ko rito. Hayaan mo na ako gawin ito."

He smiled. . .and it made me realize that Rien is slowly warming up to me. Hindi tulad noon na halos iwas siya sa amin pagkatapos ng meeting tungkol sa ginagawang script.

"Alam ng Lola mo na nagsusulat ka?' tanong ko sa kan'ya.

Tumango siya. "Noon. . .pero sinabi ko na hindi na ako nagsusulat dahil dinaldal n'ya sa mga kapitbahay namin noon."

My lips tightly pressed together before asking. "Bakit ba tinatago mo na ikaw si tocrescent?"

I saw how his face contorted into a mixture of emotions. Biglang kumunot ang noo n'ya at pakiramdam ko ay hindi n'ya alam kung paano sasagutin ang tanong ko. It was as if I had crossed a line. . .and he's putting a distance between us because of it.

"Kain na tayo," pagi-iba n'ya ng usapan.

Tumango na lang ako.

We ate in peace and Lola Marienne was happily sharing stories about Rien. Ako naman ay nakikinig lang nang taimtim at hindi maiwasan ang mapangiti dahil marami pa pala akong di alam kay Rien. I thought that tocrescent had an ideal upbringing. . .ibang-iba siya sa taong binubuo ko sa isip ko. Ang dami pala n'yang pinagdadaanan na halos. . .kasinghirap din ng mga naging sitwasyon ko.

Lola Marienne sneered after she took a gulp of her water. "Lasingero kasi yan si Rien."

"Po?" I widened my eyes.

"La, bartender. Hindi lasingero," Rien corrected, hindi maiwasan ang mapailing at mapangiti.

"Oh bakit? Ano ba tagalog ng bartender? Hindi ba't lasingero? Puro alak hawak mo?" Lola Marienne shot up a brow and glanced at him.

Rien exasperatedly sighed. "Kaya ka tinatawanan ng mga lasing sa kanto eh. Sinisigaw mo pa na 'Lasingero rin apo ko!', kaya palagi ako inaalok ng alak sa daan!"

"Ayaw mo yun?! Palagi kang may free taste!" si Lola Marienne at maligalig na tumawa.

Bumunghalit ang tawanan namin habang nasa hapagkainan. This was a nice experience. Nakalimutan ko na. . .sa Monday ay babalik na pala si Kiran sa opisina. My heart clenched at the thought that we still haven't finalized anything yet.

Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko upang mag-chat sana kay Kiran. Siya naman ang nagsabi na kapag may kailangan ay mag-chat lang. Hindi naman siguro siya magagalit kung ic-chat ko siya tungkol sa trabaho 'di ba? I just wanted to be honest. Hindi ko naman pinabayaan ang trabaho ko, sadyang mahirap lang kausap ang mga nasa opisina kapag wala si Kiran.

As soon as I opened our conversation, my eyes widened a fraction. My heart rapidly reacted because. . .I drunk texted him. Hindi ko ito maalala pero. . .base sa mga pinagc-chat ko sa kan'ya, sana ay hindi na dumating ang Monday dahil mukhang wala na akong mukhang maihaharap pa! Oh my god, Nacia! Bakit ka nagchat ng mga ganito?!

Nacia:
I love you, Palawan!