What's going on, Luce? Why are you sitting in the hallway, acting like we didn't just spend the past week flirting in the messenger and laughing together? And what's this bullshit about me leaving the RFA when this is over? You don't get to tell me what to do with my life, especially if you don't want to be a part of it!

God, I'm getting sidetracked. I just want to know what's going on with you. I don't know how to help you if you don't tell me what is wrong! Please, Luciel. My heart has been through enough already without you bruising it further.

*soft whimper*

*deep breath*

Okay, look. I've been through too much to give up on you now. I don't think you know how much I understand you, Luce. How much I know about hiding behind a cheerful facade, behind jokes and smiles and good thoughts. It's such a delicate balancing act, isn't it? Aren't you tired of it? Because I am.

*muffled muttering, possibly due to covering her face with her hands* God, am I actually doing this? Fuuuuuck.

If I tell you my story, you have to promise me something, alright? You have to promise not to see me any different. I want you to see me as a whole person, someone you can talk to and laugh with, not a broken mess that can't look herself in the eye, let alone pick up the pieces again. I don't want you to see me like that, to look at me with pity in your eyes and think: "poor thing." I--God, I can't believe I'm actually going to say this--I want you to love me, not feel sorry for me.

*another soft whimper*

Okay, I can do this.

Dark backstory coming up. If you don't like discussions and descriptions of abusive relationships, then this next chapter probably won't be for you. It is based on real-life stories from family members or close friends, and I promise I haven't embellished or Hollywoodified any parts of them. Abuse isn't a joke, a quirky backstory, or something to glamorize. It's a shitty, very common thing that happens to people, and it's very serious.