"You say that you're no good for me cause I'm always tugging at your sleeve..."
Ghost - Halsey

°°°

[17] fragile hearts

Claire did work on Tuesdays. And so did I. But it wasn't like I had anything better to do considering it was summer. I could easily ask my parents for more days off, but I knew that they needed all the help they could get around here and I was willing to do that.

It was kind of slow at eleven. David was sitting on the counter, my mom was upstairs taking a nap, and my dad left to go get some food we were running low on. Claire was sitting at a booth in the corner, pouring salt on the table and drawing shapes with her fingers.

I walked over to her and sat down, "It'd be best if you don't let my dad catch you doing that," I grinned. "He'd yell at you for wasting precious salt."

"Good thing he isn't here then, isn't it?" She said, looking over at me.

"You put your hair up," I pointed out. It was in a simple pony tail, but I could see the shape of her face more clearly now without all the hair covering it up. I debated whether or not I liked it up or down better. Then I wondering why I was even thinking such ridiculous things.

"Oh, yeah," she said, a finger playing at the end of her pony tail. "I figured I'd try something a little different."

"It looks nice." I said, smiling kindly at her.

"Um, thanks." Claire stood up. "I'm just gonna go use the bathroom."

"Okay," I said and watched her walk away.

David wasn't cooking currently considering to our slow pace, so he walked over to me and grinned. "Nolan, since it's slow right now, do you want something to eat?"

"Oh, I don't want to trouble you though," I said. "Plus, I can always make myself something to eat in the kitchen without you doing it."

"Yeah, but you cook all the time. You should have a break, David."

David just patted my shoulder and let a smile stretch onto his face. "It's perfectly fine, okay? If it wasn't, I wouldn't be asking you." David turned on his heel and made his way back to the kitchen, "I'll cook some burgers for us. Tell Claire I'm making her one, too." Before entering the kitchen fully, he turned and winked at me.

°°°

"Thanks for the burger, David," said Claire, wiping her mouth and standing up to go throw her trash away.

"It's no problem," he smiled. Claire sat back down and I chewed the rest of my burger. It was pretty quiet at the diner except the soft music we always had playing. No one was even here at the moment, so we didn't have much to do except just sit around. But David had went back to the kitchen so he could clean some of the dishes. Claire and I began to clean off of the table we had eaten at. Just as we had cleared the table completely, my dad walked through the door holding two bags full of groceries.

"We're running slow today, I see," he said, setting the bags on the bar.

"Yep," said Claire, walking over to him and helping him put up the groceries. "It hasn't been too busy, but I think it will later."

"More than likely." He agreed.

David walked out of the kitchen. "About time you're back. I made you a burger in case your hungry."

"Oh, great. Thank you." David went off to get the burger and my dad turned to look at me.

"Is your mom still sleeping?" He asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah." I nodded. "Do you want me to go wake her up?"

"No," he shook his head. "Just let her sleep a little longer. We can wake her up at three o'clock."

"Alright," I said. I got the broom and began sweeping the floor. It didn't really need it that much, but it was something to do.

"Crap," said my dad, face palming.

I stopped sweeping and looked at him. "Are you okay?"

"No, I just realized that I forgot to buy a couple things." He sighed and raked a hand through his graying hair. "Could you and Claire please go get them?" He asked, writing down the things he's forgotten.

"Yeah, sure." I said, looking at Claire. She was watching my dad write down the small list.

"Thank you," he said to the both of us. "I think this should be enough money to buy them," my dad said, holding out some money for me to take.

Claire smiled at him in return before turning back to me. "Wanna take my car?" I nodded and we walked out. The weather was pretty warm when we stepped out. I had been cooped up in the diner all day I had gotten used to the cold AC running and now I was outside the warm weather was feeling pretty good.

As soon as we got in the car, she turned on the air conditioner and began driving. It was kinda weird being in the car with her, we didn't usually talk outside of the diner so this was new. We didn't really know what to say to one another, so Claire just turned up the radio and we listened to some music to fill in the silence.

We arrived at the supermarket fairly quick. There was a popular pop song playing that I didn't care enough to know the name of, but Claire began humming a bit to it as we made our way to one of the aisles.

"How come your dad forgot so many things?" asked Claire, grabbing a big bottle of ketchup.

"He's forgetful, I guess," I said and grabbed the pickles.

"Guess so," she sighed.

We got the rest of the things my dad had told us to get, double checked it, and then went to the counter to ring up all our supplies. As we walk out, I spotted a familiar girl and boy walking by us.

It was Nina and Rick, the two people along with Clarity who I'd went to the party with. Correction: the party where she and I kissed. Nina was smiling at whatever Rick had said prior to their conversation. Rick's eyes flickered towards Claire and I, then he smiled widely. "Nolan! Nina, babe, look -"

Her eyes traveled to mine and she smiled. "Haven't seen you since the party. It's lucky I remember you considering I got super drunk. Maybe it was your hot looks." She teased and Rick rolled his eyes.

"You better stop talking like that," he warned playfully and I felt a little uncomfortable. Claire was silent beside me and I wondered what she was thinking.

I turned to her, "They're just a few people I know."

She just nodded slightly and smiled politely at them. "Hi, I'm Claire." They both introduced each other to her and Nina sparked a conversation with her as Rick kept looking at me.

I swung the bag of groceries in my hand slightly and looked down, "Um, so have you seen-?"

"Clarity?" He smirked. "Actually, yeah. As a matter of fact, she's back at the apartment right now with a hangover."

The small hope that she might be back in their car disintegrated. I tried not to look too disappointed by his answer, but he noticed. "If you really wanna see her or whatever, come to the apartment sometime. She spends more time there than anywhere else anyways. Plus, I can manage the company and you're pretty cool so it's fine."

"Alright, I'll keep that in mind." I probably looked needy an desperate to talk to her. I mean, I am but that didn't mean I want him to know how much I was. Which was actually a lot.

"Well, hopefully I'll see you around," he said, smiling. "Nina, ready to go?"

She looked up and nodded. She waved at the both of us and walked into the store with Rick.

"Well that was something," Claire said, watching them walk in. "Ready?"

°°°

I really hadn't thought this through, I thought as I made my way up to Rick's apartment. It was the right apartment, I hoped since it was based all on memory. It had been two days since I'd seen Rick and Nina, and those two days spent considering if I should go there or not.

Of course Rick had said I could come by - to see Clarity or possibly hang out with him or something. What if he was just saying that to be nice? Some people do that, just say something nice and not really mean it but still do it anyways.

I cursed at myself for taking so long, just standing at his door. If it was taking this long just to knock on the door, it'd suck if one of the main person I wanted to see wasn't here. Not like I didn't want to hang out with Rick or anything, but I just really wanted to talk to Clarity.

Finally, I got the courage to knock on the door. After hearing a few curse words and banging, the door finally opened. It was Clarity, her gray eyes dark, hair down and messy, and her makeup was badly smudged. My heart was beating faster and faster and I felt a smile curve my lips.

"Oh," she said, surprised, "Nolan? Why're you here? Have you come to talk to Rick or -"

"Um, no," I cleared my throat. "I've come to talk to you."

Realization crossed her face, and she nodded. "Alright then. Give me a second and let me put on some shoes." I nodded and sat down on the steps. After a couple moments later, she came out and sat down beside me. There was a small gap between us.

"So what do you want to talk about?" asked Clarity. She surely knew what I wanted to talk about, wouldn't she? I bit my lip. I didn't know how to say it. Just blurt it out? Make hints to what I'm talking about?

"Um," my voice sounded weird to my ears, but she didn't seem to notice. I felt my face grow red, and I suddenly felt foolish for wanting to talk about it. I mean, yeah, I was super confused about what was going on between us now, but what if I was making it out to be too big of a deal? But I'd like to know what the kiss meant to her, especially if it meant as much as it meant to me.

She glanced over at me, and I guess she could tell what I was thinking because she sighed. "That's what you want to talk about."

"Well, i-if you don't want to -"

"No, you need to know," she sighed again. "Look, we kissed. And yeah, it was not a bad kiss. But that doesn't mean I want to date you."

I felt like I'd just been stabbed straight in my chest. "Well, why'd you kiss me in the first place?" I was kinda hurt and my heart felt like it had sunk down to my stomach, but I was trying to understand her reasons.

"Just because you kiss someone doesn't mean you have to date them," she answered.

"Then what are we?" I asked her.

"You're Nolan and I'm Clarity. We aren't together. We're barely even friends. Just two people that's hung out a few times. And that's it."

°°°

look here, a new update. I'm tired of making excuses as to why my updates are so slow. I've just had lack of motivation and inspiration for this book..

I will finish this book though. I don't know exactly when but soemtime

What're your thoughts about Clarity and Nolan's discussion about their kiss?