───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

"YOU BETTER GET YO CRUSTY MUSTY ASS OVER HERE RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY OR YOU'RE ABORTED!" I shrieked into the phone, leaving an autistic voicemail for my number one hoe. The game was set up, and everyone was just now joining.

/thanoisthicc69 has joined!
/tapemedaddy has joined!
/greenmight has joined!
/rockhard has joined!
/rejectpikash!t has joined!
/hippityhoppitybish has joined!
/floatypotato has joined!

The pounding of someone at my door made me whip my head around and get whiplash. I screeched as the door slammed over, revealing an out of breath guy.

"Gaming week..." Magnus huffed, clenching his ass cheeks as he gripped the door. I materialized a green appendage from my arm and yeeted him over to me, making him smack a bean bag.

"Bitch it's about time. The thot gang is joining." I pointed to the screen to show him, to which he nodded, almost impressed.

/darknessismylife has joined!
/betterthenallmight has joined!
/daddyissuesarehot has joined!
/pinkypie has joined!
/tentaclehentai has joined!
/iwhipmytailbackandforth has joined!
/sugardaddy has joined!
/robotic-policeofficer has joined!
/frenchfriesarefab has joined!
/hardcorerockthot has joined!

"Holy shit, your class are actual gods." Magnus whispered, as if ushering a prayer. On the screen, they were working together to make houses or just straight up abominations. A classic really.

"You know, I don't think most of these people know how to play." I snickered, adjusting my headphones and mic. He connected his controller to my xbox, or the thot box, and logged in, a smile on his face.

/nibbatelojones has joined!

"Had to do it to 'em." To which he immediately went through my chests, yoinked a sword and started slaughtering my classmates. I turned on my microphone and instantly regretted it.

"DON'T SAY THE N WORD."

"SPARE COOCHIE MA'AM?"

"WHO THE FUCK IS KILLING ME?! I WILL DESTROY YOUR BLOODLINE, YOU FUCKING BIT-"

/nibbatelojones has killed betterthenallmight

"IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!"

"THAT IS ONE LONG DONG."

"THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER!"

"I'M FINNA GET A BIG TIDDY GOTH MINECRAFT GF BOYS!"

Slowly, I took off my headphones and gave a sigh. Not only was I now deaf, but the lads were all evolving into top tier Minecraft gods. I dashed over to my house, ignoring the TNT infused peen and the many people being slaughtered around it. The sign above my house read 'The Crack Shack', which highly was the most perfect name in the world.

"Oh my god, I'm finna say the n word to these plebs if they don't stop hitting my dog." Magnus screamed, holding the controller as if it were an aeroplane flying.

/betterthenallmight was slain by daddyshrek.

"THAT FUCKING DOG! I'M GOING TO MURDER IT IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO ON THIS CURSED SERVER!!" I winced as the screaming of Bakugou infiltrated my headphones, even though they were on the floor. I could also feel the floor shake. The crusty male to my right cleared his voice before putting on the headset.

"Aye (BLEEP), don't touch my dog, homie." His voice was unusually deep, and the fact he spoke the language of the hood gods made everyone shut up. I fell back, crying as I laughed and rolled around. He gave an innocent smirk before taking off the headphones and chucking them to me, which was filled with earrape.

"Do YoU hAvE a N wOrD pASs?"

"HOLY SHIT! HE'S BLAAAACK!"

"IT'S THE CHOSEN ONE! LEAD US MASTER!"

"GIVE ME A PASS! PLEASE SNOOP DOG!"

"IS THAT A THREAT?!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY ON THIS CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER?!"

"CREEPER!"

And on queue, the distinct sound of a sizzling explosion blasted from the headphones, making me choke on air as I wheezed.

/nibbatelojones was blown up by creeper.
/sugardaddy was blown up by creeper.
/tapemedaddy was blown up by creeper.
/betterthenallmight was blown up by creeper.

"GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!" I wiped a few tears from my eyes, crying with Magnus as we both lost it at Bakuhoe's rage. I kept slapping the floor and rolling around, dying from the chuckles. I picked up the headset and fumbled with the mic, trying to hold in my giggles.

"Could everyone please come to the crack shack now. I have a surprise." I announce, reigniting the chat between my classmates.

"THE CRACK SHACK?! wHEEZE."

"dO yOu sMoKe h2O?"

"Does Shrek live there?"

"THERE BETTER BE SOME GOOD GOOD INSIDE."

"I am led to believe this is a trap..."

"WHO SHIDDED ON THIS SHEEP?! IT'S BROWN!"

I watched as everyone dashed inside, the sounds of chests opening becoming earrape. Most had... interesting skins. I think Kaminari's was a pikachu with a hot pink bikini on. I snickered, standing a good twenty blocks away with Magnus, who was besides me. With the flick of a lever to my right, the sound of redstone activating making me grin. Soon after, the familiar sizzle was evident.

"What's that sound..?"

"OH SHIT! IT'S THE COPS!"

"RUN WEEBS! RUN!"

/thanoisthicc69 blew up
/tapemedaddy blew up
/greenmight blew up
/rockhard blew up
/rejectpikashit blew up
/hippityhoppitybish blew up
/darknessismylife blew up
/betterthenallmight blew up
/hardcorerockthot blew up
/daddyissuesarehot blew up
/pinkypie blew up
/floatypotato blew up
/tentaclehentai blew up
/iwhipmytailbackandforth blew up
/sugardaddy blew up
/robotic-cop blew up
/frenchfriesarefab blew up

"WHAT THE FRICK FRACK?!"

"I KNEW IT!"

"WHAT?!"

"SOKODU I SWEAR TO JAH!"

"BRUH."

"I'M GOING TO STRANGLE YOU! FUCK THIS SHITTY SERVER!"

/betterthenallmight has left the game

"DUDE I JUST FOUND THE COOCHIE!"

"Fuck..."

I fell back, gasping for air while Magnus was choking on air, wheezing his lungs out. I struggled to sit back up because of my fat ass and the fact my gut was stinging from the laughter.

"YOU BITCH!" I felt my blood run cold when my door was slammed open, revealing an anger radiating poodle. I fell back as he jumped on top of me, trying to strangle me.

"HELP! RAPE! I AIN'T READY TO GO YET!" I shouted, wrestling as I fought against the distressed porcupine. He was saddled on me, yelling profanities as he strangled me like Bart Simpson. I looked back and saw Magnus, just sitting back and watching, eating popcorn and speaking into the mic.

"Alright gang, it's me, the black guy, giving a play by play of what's going down in Y/N's dorm room." He shoveled another fistful of popcorn into his head. "So... this anger issues guy has just burst down her door and is currently strangling her. Oh, she's asking for help." I scowled, making a T for time out, however, that wasn't helping.

"THAT FUCKING MINECRAFT SERVER SUCKS! I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET FUCKING SHITTY HAIR CONVINCE ME TO GODDAMN PLAY!" Teeth gnashing, he growled down at me, the smell of smoke in the air. Wheezing, I activated my super speed and watched as Bakugou's movements slowed down and his vocals warped.

I pressed my lips together, rolling the thot over so that I was straddling him. I also removed his hands from my neck, which really wasn't even strangling me hard. Because choke me dadd-

I blinked and watched his face contort into anger, then confusion, and then a dark shade. I gave a triumphant grin, giving him the old circle finger.

"Get obliterated, bitch boy." I declare, standing up from the defeated furry. Kicking the air, the spastic member of society stands up, giving me a glare, to which I returned. "1v1 me on Minecraft. Oh wait, you suck at Minecraft."

"1v1 me in real life. Oh wait, you suck at real life." I gave a gasp, holding my chest as I reached out. My legs gave out as I fell backwards, landing on my hottie thottie onlooker, hands covered in buttered popcorn.

"Are you all goods, brother?" Magnum dong whispered, watching the creature carefully as it made it's way out of the room. It stomped and huffed, glancing back to give a devilish smirk. Even the lava boy could admit, pee pee hardening powers had activated. He looked down, looking in shame as the girl had curled up into a ball of misery on his lap.

❝WE'VE BEEN TRICKED,
WE'VE BEEN BACKSTABBED,
AND WE'VE QUITE
POSSIBLY BEEN BAMBOOZLED.❞

－

a.n

Try and name every username.
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