13

They say everything has their own purpose, to live and to serve. Every story has an ending but some of them are tragic. People will feel love and hurt. We can't take the fact that this world is living in bustling chaos. But there's one thing that I'm sure of, and that's me.

I barely lost myself, but look at me now. Strong and independent. I thought I'm gonna suffer for my whole life with this mental illness but luckily I defeated it. I'm free now, free from worries, pain and anxiety. Whenever I remember my past I can't stop my tears flowing with happiness.

And now. I'm starting to reach my dreams with my Father. Even though I couldn't see him, I always feel his presence in my heart and that makes me awaken myself to fight.

The breeze is cold, waving like an ocean in the atmosphere. My heart is beating fast. I stared at his eyes as he approached me. He gave me a genuine smile. "God didn't bring you this far to leave you. He's always watching you above like your father does," I smiled and nodded as he said those words. I still remember how we met, he's a really responsible guy. He's Heewon after all.

I blink twice when he gave his medal on me. Now, I'm wearing his achievement. Magkasalubong ang aking kilay na pinagmasdan siya. "Do you want to achieve more thing's with me? More than yesterday?" I just find myself hugging him. Ramdam ko ang paninigas niya dahil sa pagkabigla. No words came out from me, but I guess he know my answer.

Dad and Mom both smiling. Napangiwi ako nang makita ko kung paano sila mailang sa isa't isa. They almost spend their life together but I can see how uncomfortable they are now. Everything change, even the way they looked at each other. "We are proud, jixie especially your father," pagkasabi ni Dad ay niyakap niya ako ng mahigpit.

Nang pinakawalan ako ni Dad mula sa kanyang bisig ay nagsalita si Mommy, "Do you want us to celebrate in your dad mansion? I know he's missing your presence there." I just smile as my answered.

We made our way there. Naabutan namin sila lola at lolo na nasa labas. I looked at Mom. Does they planned it?

They greeted me with congratulations until we went inside. Hindi ko namalayan ang pag ngiti ko. How can I not smile if my whole family, even my grandma's and grandpa's, are here in my new home. I'm looking forward to living here. This mansion has a big space in my heart. If someday I'll leave this place, I'll make sure it will be full of love from other people.

Hindi ko mapigilan na lumuha sa kanilang regalo sa akin. Naluluha silang nakangiti habang pinapanood ako na pagmasdan ang malaking larawan na ngayo'y nakasabit sa gitnang bahagi ng pader. It's my Father picture. Wala akong ideya kung saan nila nakuha ito, ngunit nagpapasalamat ako at ngayo'y malaya ko ng pagmasdan ang mukha niya.

Everytime I walk in the direction of his picture on the wall, I always stop and stare for a minute. I really looked like him, the way he smiled, his aura and his expression.

Many things happened. Years passed, I completely healed. I achieve many goals in my life on my own. I even spend my time doing things that I want to do. Now, I have become an attorney that I used to dream about. Serving and giving the justice that victims deserve. In many years of serving, I finally found my peace but there's something that is pulling me back to the past. It still puzzles me.

Tumigil ako sa pagbabasa ng mga kaso ng napansin ko ang maliit na kalendaryo na nakalagay sa aking lamesa. Mabilis ko na kinuha ko ang phone at tinignan, napatayo ako sa bigla. It's already three in the afternoon. Sinimulan kong ayusin ang mga gamit ko at tinahak ang pinto paalis.

Tumayo ang secretary ko mula sa kanyang pagkakaupo at sinalubong ako. "Move my appointment today," I said while rushing my walk. Hindi ko alintana kung nakasuot ako ng takong as long na makapunta ako ng maaga roon.

"But attorney--"

Tumigil ako sandali sa paglalakad at humarap sa kanya. Huminga ako ng malalim upang pakalmahin ang sarili. "Just do it, okay?" wala na itong nagawa kundi tumango. I immediately went in my car and started to made my way there.

Kung dati ay mabigat ang loob ko sa bawat pagkakataon na dumadalaw dito ngayon ay nabawasan na. It's the reality, I can't stopped things that will happened. It's been a three years when she died. I know she's with my Father now.

Maliwanag pa rin ang paligid. Dala-dala ko ang malaking flower bouquet para kay Mommy. It's good that there's flower shop near here so I still have gift for my Mom. Yumuko ako at umupo. Hinaplos ko ang pangalan niya na nakaukit sa lapida. Helen Abella 1977-2019. I know she's happy now. Nilagay ko ang bulaklak sa tabi niya.

Tumagal lang ako ng ilang minuto at umalis na din. I exhaled as I closed my eyes. When I opened my eyes. I saw a sign in the sky. Suddenly memory from my past pooped. Napangiti na lamang ako ng maalala ko iyon. Does Mom and Dad want me to have my own family?

Natatawa ako na umiling. Naglakad muli ako hanggang sa marating ko ang aking sasakyan. I saw Dad standing in the garden of the mansion, I walk toward him. "You're late again. Guess, they give you a sign again?" napangiwi ako sa tudyong tanong niya.

Napabuga ako ng hangin. "I can live my life alone," I defense.

He chuckled. "Don't you want to have a mini version of you?" natigil ako ng ilang sandali.

"Time is running, don't waste your time. Go find him, I know he's waiting for you..."

"What about you dad? You're not going to forget mom? It's been a year, dad." I know that dad still has feelings for my Mom but it's not enough to make my Mom give up his love for my Father.

He sadly smiled. "I'm near to forget her, just waiting for my death," kibit balikat na aniya.

Napatitig ako sa kanya. "Are you gonna leave me too?" I tried to make my tone in a sad mode. He always says those words, and it makes me mad. Does he really want to leave me alone?

"If you really want someone to accompany you, then find him. I'm not gonna leave you, not until I'm content to watch you afar." I stare at him for a second.

"I bake a cake in the kitchen. Do you want to taste it?" Dad really knows how to change our topic. Sabay naming tinahak ang daan paloob. Hindi ko maiwasan na mamangha kay Dad, he's really good at baking. He just learn by watching youtube videos, it's his habit. I hugged him tight as my lips were smiling.

I'm in my own office. I'm wearing eyeglasses as I read an article. Inabot ko ang kape na nasa gilid ng siko ko. I drink it while my eyes are on the newspaper. When I opened it, my assistant greeted me with a smile. "Attorney, there's someone waiting for you," She said. Ibinaba ko ang hawak ko sa table glass.

"Does that someone has appointment today?" Suddenly I asked. Tumingin siya sa tablet na hawak niya at muling tumingin sa akin.

"Yes, attorney. I background check them. They want your help, it's about their daughter's death." Sumandal ako sa swivel chair. The time was running, I saw how the arm of the clock moved like it was chasing something.

"Let them in," I said. She nodded and she did what I commanded. I talked for a minute with the family of the victim. This case is about discrimination and bully. I know it's difficult because the suspects are not of legal age, but it doesn't mean that they will never taste the power of law. I thought before that this thing will never happen again but seeing and hearing about this case makes me feel guilty.

I saw how this family wants to have justice for their daughter. Ruthless world, tragic ending. No one will experience a happy everlasting end.

"Salamat, aasahan namin ang pangako niyo," the mother said while crying. Promises, back then I used that this word will never to be turn into a reality. Ngayon ko lang napagtanto na ang mga ginagawa ko ay isang pangako. They used to wait for the promises to be real.

Nakauwi ako ng maaga, I cleared again my schedule. I really want to treat myself for winning a case again. Ito ang naging gawi ko whenever I won a case, celebrating with Dad or to be alone. I know that Dad is busy right now to our business so I didn't bother to invite him.

I booked a flight to an island. They invited us for our reunion. I appreciate it, they still remember me. So I just decided to go there now, I can celebrate with them rather than be alone.

Ilang oras ang itinagal ng byahe. I'm now in a private yacht. Sinadya kong magpasundo, I want to feel the salty atmosphere alone. The sunset is shining in the sky. I can't take my eyes off it. It is captivating.

Nang makarating kami sa pampang ay may sumalubong sa amin, binuhat nila ang iba kong gamit. Inilagay nila ito sa aking cabin. It's really tiring day. I let myself gain a energy by sleeping.

I slowly opened my eyes when there was knocking on my door. I looked out the window, the sun was getting higher.

Binuksan ko ang pintuan. Nanigas ako sa aking kinatatayuan ng sunggaban ako ng yakap ni Vessy. Naiilang akong yumakap pabalik. I still didn't clean myself, it's embarrassing.

Humiwalay siya ng yakap. She's still smiling. "I'm sorry, did I bother you? I really miss you, president." I smile as I shake my head. She always calls me president as if she didn't become one.

"The breakfast is ready. Do you want to join us?" Wala na akong magawa kundi ang pumayag. Sinabi ko na lang na susunod ako. I straightly went in the bathroom and started to take a shower.

Nagsalo-salo kaming lahat sa isang mahabang lamesa. All of them are now successful as I imagined before. I'm happy that they reach their dreams like me. "You're a really successful attorney, your name is making a big sound in our country," someone complimented me. I shrugged and chuckled.

"Yeah. Your same with attorney--" hindi na natuloy ang sasabihin ng may dumating na mga pagkain pa. Muli ay napailing ako. He almost say it.

Kinuha ko ang baso na nasa gilid ko at uminom. When I finished my food I went straight in my room. Iet myself to be alone again. It's so hot outside, I'll go outside when the sun is fading. Buong magdamag ay nanood ako sa tv.

Nang dumating na ang hapon saka lang ako lumabas sa aking cabin. Mas marami ang tao ngayon kumpara kanina. I closed my jacket when cold breeze greeted me. Nakatayo ako sa gilid, hinahayaan na mabaha ang aking paa. Pumikit ang mata ko habang dinadama ang kwintas na nakalagay sa aking leeg.

Mom, Dad. I can't wait to meet you two...

Tumigil ako sa paghaplos sa aking kwintas ng maramdaman ko na may tumabi sa akin. I looked at my right side. He's peacefully watching the sunset in our place. I looked away from.

I felt how my heart became wild. I never expected that my heart still beating again. "You still waiting?" I blurted. Sumasabay sa pag hangin ang paggalaw ang aking bestidang puti. He's wearing a simple white polo.

Dahan-dahan niya akong nilingon. "I didn't wait," he seriously said.

"I sought you in our yesterday passed but I never saw you. Even though I didn't find you, I am still waiting for you until our tomorrow." He looked at my hand. He's looking at the thing that I was wearing. Before I parted our day, he gave me this. Ring that symbolizes another tomorrow.

"The days want to end but our tomorrow will stay. I'm not leaving you in our yesterday. I'm keeping you today and tomorrow." Tears starting to fall from my eyes. I'm looking in his eyes, full of desire. First promise that someone made from me, he made it real.

                             END