My untouched car beeped behind me, signaling it was locked as I walked slowly up to front doors of the hosptial. Yeah, maybe I was delaying myself, but I didn't want to go up there. It was what I had to do to stay out of trouble.

My boots clicked aginst the ground below my feet. My stomach was strangely in knots, why, I have no idea. Its not like seeing her means anything to me. It's probably because I know if I screw this up, her parents will press major charges aginst me.

I approached the front desk, my intentions to just get in there, put on a little act, and then get out as fast as I could.

"Paisley Evans." I said monotoniously, eyeing the nurse.

"She's in the ICU, room 246." The nurse said, pointing to the elevator.

"Thanks." I mumbled under my breath and went to the elevator, pressing the 'up' button.

After waiting far too long for an elevator, the doors finally opened, revealing a single, fragile looking old woman. She looked nervously at me as I stood on the complete opposite side of the small elevator. I could see why she would look at me nervously, with my tattoos and all, but it's not like I intentonally want to go around and hurt people. It just...happens.

I was relieved when the doors opened and I could get out of there. I went in the direction of the arrow pointing for 240-260, the knots in my stomach tightening, if that was even possible.

A group of people stood outside her door. Great. I was hoping I could just sneak in and say sorry and then sneak back out. But what was I thinking, of course her parents would be by her side. Most parents are like that.

Her parents are probably pissed at me, too. They probably want me nowhere near her.

You have to do it, though. I thought. This would cause me a lot more problems if I didn't do it. I walked up to them, a little spring in my step, because if they say they won't let me see her, then I'm kind of off the hook.

"Hello, uh, I'm Harry Styles. I was wondering if I could see Paisley?" I said, and immediately everyone in the group turned their eyes towards me. There was two middle-aged women, a girl that looked to be about my age, and a man, that I presumed was her dad. One of the woman's eyes raised in shock.

"Uh...uh, you want to see her?" She asked, her eyes traveling over to the man, as if they were having a silent conversation.

"Yes, I uh, think it's only appropriate after everything that has happened." I said. I had to make this as believable as possible. "I want to apologize." I said as sincerely as I possibly could, trying to fake regret in my voice.

The father's eyebrows rose, as if he didn't think it was a good idea.

"Please. I, uh, I've been thinking a lot about her lately." I lied. I hadn't given her a second thought since I left the hospital, except to mentally curse out my parents for making me see her. The lie seemed to work, though, as her mother's eye's turned soft and kind.

I almost felt bad that I was faking all of this. Almost.

"Okay. We might as well go right in, then." She said, motioning to the closed door. She went through first, and the knot, that somewhat disappeared as I lied my way throught her parents was back. I don't want to see her. I don't want to see what I did to her.

"Paisley, you have a visitor." I slowly walked through the door, behind her mother. I couldn't see her yet, as we hadn't yet rounded the corner.

"Who is it?" The soft voice spoke. Before her mother could answer her innocent question, she came into view, and by the widening of her eyes, I knew I was the last person she was expecting.

She lay in the hospital bed, the sheets all twisted around her. She had a breathing tube in her nose, and I flinched when I saw a needle connected to an IV in her hand. Her face was recognizable, but it had scars gracing all her features. She sat in what appeared to be a very uncomfortable position and just stared at me.

Her eyes met mine, and all sorts of feelings came back to me as I saw those shocking blue eyes again. I swear I could see her mangled body laying there in front of me again.

Her mom left and she finally spoke. "What are you doing here?" Her voice brought me back to the surface. She didn't sound mad, which was good, she sounded...confused?

"Uh..." I said, totally blanking as she looked me up and down. I started walking over to the chair next to her bed. She had a kind expression on her face, but I could see her becoming more and more guarded as the seconds passed. "I uh, wanted to talk to you."

"Oh." She said. It was silent for a minute, as my mind raced, trying to decide what to say.

"You, you look like you're doing well." I said. I didn't think I would be this nervous. She means nothing to me, so why am I having such a hard time putting on the same act I did for her parents?

"That's a compliment that gives me no pleasure." She said, her voice a little more stiff than it was before.

"Uh, well, I'm Harry, if you didn't know. We go to school together."

"Yeah."

"Well, I was the one that... hit you." I said, shutting my eyes as I said it.

"Yeah, I know that."

"I just wanted to say that, uh, I'm-"

"Harry, why are you here?" She asked, and I looked at her straight in the eyes again, confused as to why she cut me off.

"I-I'm here to apologize." I said. Why in the hell am I intimidated by the broken girl laying in the hospital bed.

"Really?" she asked, a look of disbelief on her face.

"Yes." I said, probably too confidently, and she was silent for a minute, staring straight at me, studying my face, as if to see if I was telling the truth or not.

"Please leave." She said suddenly.

"What? Why?" I asked, getting a little annoyed that she didn't want to at least hear my apology. She didn't have to accept it. Hell if I cared.

"Harry, what made you decide to come here?" She asked.

"I...wanted to...see you." I said, too hesitantly.

"Harry, I can tell you don't want to be here. I may look broken to you, but I'm not stupid. And I don't want you to be here unless you want to be here."

"I-" I didn't even get to say anything before she cut me off.

"Come back when your heart is in it." She said. There's no point in fighting with her, obviously she's not as naive as her parents and could see right through my act.

I nodded and headed right through the door without another word.

Luckily, the group of family wasn't waiting outside the room still, so I just slipped down the hallway and got back into the elevator. Heading back to my car, I was more confused than anything.

She had messed me up. I don't know what I was expecting, but that wasn't it.

Was I expecting her to forgive me? Or was I expecting her to threaten me to never come near her again? I'm not sure, but I feel like I would've preferred either of those to what actually happened.

She seemed so calm, for the most part. And she wasn't hostile towards me at all. She was kind, but also confident in what she wanted. The way she spoke to me with such emotion made an almost sickening feeling stir in my stomach.

"Come back when your heart is in it?" Her words rang over in my mind.

Well, fine. If she doesn't want to hear what I have to say, I shouldn't waste my time on her. I was trying to make an effort, kind of, but she just dismissed me like I was nothing to her.

"This is bullshit." I said to myself as I stepped into my car. This girl is messing me up. I need to just forget her and move on. I'm not sorry and I probably won't ever be. I did what my parents asked, so now I can just forget this ever happened and move on with my life. She's not actally expecting me to come back anyway. I convinced myself as I pulled out of the parking lot, trying my hardest to clear my head of any thought about her.

* * * * * * *

I walked through the front door, eager to tell my parents that I went to visit her. Then, they'd just drop all of the 'we're disappointed in you' act, and we could all move on. The kitchen and living room were empty, so I headed up the stairs in search of one of them.

"Rachel." I called. I briefly thought about calling her mom, just to get on her good side, but then decided against it. When she started acting like a true mother to me, I'd call her mom.

"In here." She called, her voice coming from the direction of my parents' room. I walked in to find clothes spread all across the bed, her suitcase sitting next to it on the floor.

"Are you going out of town?" I asked, already knowing the answer. They left every weekend.

"Yeah, we're going up to Portland to meet with some clients." She said.

"Oh."

"What did you need?" She asked, and for a minute I felt like I was being interrogated by her again.

"I went to the hosptial today and apologized..so." I said, looking to her expectantly.

"Really?" She asked, not even looking up from her packing.

"Yeah. I said I was sorry and blah blah blah, she said she didn't really have anything to say to me, and then she told me to leave. But I tried, and that's all you guys wanted me to do. I held up my end of the deal." I said.

"Great, Harry. We'll just have to settle with her family in court now, then." She said, still not even looking me in the eye. It's like they only care when I'm in trouble or going to bring bad attention to them.

"Okay. So everything's fine then? Will we have trouble in court?" I asked, just wanting to confirm that I was pretty much in the clear.

"Yeah. I don't think we'll have a hard time settling for something not too bad." She said.

"Okay. I'm outta here." I said, waving her off and heading back to my room.

I'm actually glad they're leaving this weekend. Most of the time when they leave, it's just a painful reminder of the fact that their work is most important to them, but right now, I'm mentally cheering that I'll have the house to myself for the weekend. Maybe I'll even have a few friends over.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, so I pull it out to see Niall's name pop up on the screen. All my friends know about the accident, and like me, none of them really care all that much, and since myself and my car are fine, we've sort of got this unspoken agreement not to bring it up again. It would only down the mood of our normal partying atmosphere.

The only difference is, they don't actually know how severe she was hurt. But I'd like to keep it that way. No one needs to know anyway.

He's texted me the address of some party they were all going to tonight. It was supposed to be some backyard rave or something. Apparently they had a pool and everything, so it was going to be sick.

I texted him back saying I'd be there, and deicded to shower so I would arrive at the party the same time everyone else did.

* * * * * * *

An hour and a half later, I was showered, I was dressed for a night out, in black jeans, and black button down shirt, with my hair swung across my forehead. The women always said that was the feature they find most attractive, so why not make them drool?

I headed out to my car and hopped in, ready to party. There is nothing I need more than to just forget about all that's happened, so that's just what I'll do.

* * * * * * * *

Harry, you idiot.

But you look really good in the gif up top so it's okay.

Does anyone actually read this?? Just wondering... ◡̈

Please vote and let me know what you think! (And by let me know what you think, I mean comment.)

Macy xx.