Chapter 14

       That atmosphere in the staff room was stifling. Sarah and I were the only people in the room and I could have cut the tension with a knife.

"Aaron King?" She blurted.

"Can we not?" I looked at her with dead pan eyes. I don't think I slept last night, not a wink. I had too many thoughts flying around one mind. I felt I couldn't take a break from it.

"I could barely sleep last night." Sarah sighed. It was if my mind was speaking for her. She couldn't sleep last night? I wanted to scoff while the bags under my eyes laughed with me. "Why are you looking at me as if you want to murder me? Has Aaron King been rubbing off on you?"

"Sarah, honestly, I wish you'd fuck off." Even I was shocked at my reply. It wasn't like me to be so mean to other people. Maybe Aaron was rubbing off on me. "I'm sorry." I sighed. "I didn't sleep last night either, I just don't want to talk about it."

"None taken." Sarah holds up her hands with the sandwich she was eating grasped loosely in her fingers. "You needed to grow a pair of balls anyway."

I wanted to scoff again, but I knew she was right. I was getting frustrated at myself, I hated the woman I had become. In fact, I don't think I ever liked the way I was.

Without replying, I stood up from my seat. I needed to get back to work. I placed my rubbish in the bin.

"I'll see you later." I said to Sarah, who was leaning back in her seat, tapping away at her phone.

"Chin up, Chloe." She said. "One day you'll get out of this mess." I wanted to smile but I couldn't seem to muster up the energy.

I left the room, rubbed my hands across my trousers and got back to work.

It was dinner time for the inmates so I went straight to the hall. It was bustling as usual and I felt as if my head was too far in to fantasy land to be useful.

Whilst I was standing in the corner of the room, keeping an uncareful watch across the hall, a thought came to me. I hadn't thought of Aaron most of the day. Yet, as soon as I did, every part of my body stood to attention.

Where was he? He was always so mysterious, but I don't think I'd ever be able to miss him in a room. Do you think he felt as shitty as I did? I suppose he always felt shitty being cramped in all four walls.

I was starting to hate this place too.

"I fucking hate women working a male's job." I heard a voice coming from the table ahead of me. Phillip Douglas, behind bars because he was a rapist. I looked over at the table and his eyes were looking right at me.

I wanted to retreat, yet all I could feel was a simmering anger.

I ignored him.

"Women are only good for one thing." He stated. I heard more snickering throughout the rest of the table. Phillip was still looking right at me.

The anger was bubbling up inside me. I could feel it within my veins. It was never like me to want to rip the head off the shoulders of someone else, but right now, I wanted to.

That's why I always thought I'd be good at this job. I was sensitive, yes. I was easily walked on, yes. But I wasn't fazed by many things or many people. I could cry about it and then forget it and move on with my life.

"Whores." He said. "Sluts." He continued. I looked right at him, my anger elevating to dangerous levels. The twinkle in his eyes were prevalent and I couldn't seem to forget about it. "Is the little flower angry?" He taunted.

I knew what he wanted, he wanted a reaction from me. He wanted me to go over there, he wanted me to cause a scene.

I wasn't going to do it.

"What you going to do, flower?" He continued further. "You're nothing but a slut."

Without thinking, without being able to control my body, I moved forward at speed. I was fuelled by anger and anger alone. I had lost all sense, all common sense.

Once I got to the table with a group full of men watching me with smirks along their faces, I slammed my hands down on it with force. I managed to rattle the table, but the men didn't seem rattled at all.

"Don't you dare fucking speak to me like that." I hissed. I was red in the face, I was sure. "Or I will make your time in here absolute fucking hell."

The smirks fell off the faces of the men, but not Phillip's. He was enjoying this. Of course he was enjoying this. He loved terrorising women. Why was I scooping down to his level?

"I love hell." He laughed.

Before I could reply again, a body came up beside me. I was so close to shouting the hall down. The last thing I needed today was this. I was ready to blow and I couldn't handle the emotions within me, bubbling further and further to the surface.

I think I was having a break down.

"You heard her." Aaron. "I would shut your fucking mouth before I break it." He seemed so calm, so composed, and so... scary. How did he do it?

"Do you really think I care what you say?" Phillip stood up and made his way towards Aaron. Fuck. What had I started?

"I think you should." Aaron replied. "Do you want me to tell everyone here about Strawberry Fields in 99?" He said. I had no clue what he meant by that, but it seemed to have worked. Phillip backed off. "Have some fucking respect for the people who work here. And for fuck sake, have some respect towards women."

He didn't even reply. He was gone before anyone could say another word. His mates followed him briskly out of the hall.

I could barely move. Aaron was behind me taking up all of my oxygen. And what the fuck did I think I was doing? At this point, I don't even think I cared.

"Alright, sunshine?" I heard Aaron's voice behind me. He moved towards the bench and sat down as if nothing had happened. How was he so bloody calm? I felt like a shaking leaf and I wasn't sure whether that was the anger or because I had too much adrenaline in my veins.

It was probably both.

"Well, I can say it is a shock for me to see you like that." He smirked while he looked at me with a twinkle in his eye. "Who knew you could be so bold?"

"Thanks." I rolled my eyes.

"Don't be insulted." Aaron replied. "I've just never seen you like that before. It's not a bad thing, I'm just happy you're starting to find your feet with people who don't deserve your kindness."

"I don't think it's kindness." I sighed. "Maybe I'm just not cut out for a job like this." I rubbed the bridge of my nose.

"I thought that at a time." He said with no bother in the world. It's not like he was hurting my feelings or anything. "But you're getting there, Chloe. It's not like I want you to change but I hate to think of people taking advantage of you. That really fucking angers me."

"I did all the training, all the exams and the experience, but nobody teaches you to be so tough." I said. "I expected it, of course I did, but I'm always hopeful I could do it."

"And you can." He interjected. "You're human, that's all." He pushes the tray away from before him. "You seem very miserable." He was tracing the line of the wood in the table.

"That's because I am."

Aaron didn't say anything. He got up from the table and walked straight out of the room. I sighed.

Well, he could have replied. I was left feeling a little deflated, but I think I was just too tired to care.

I moved back to the corner of the room, grateful that nobody had suspected a thing. Maybe people just didn't care? I was hoping that was true. I suppose it would be a lot easier for me if nobody did care, that way I would never get found out.

I sighed. I was set in a negative mindset that I just couldn't get out of. A goodnights sleep may help me tomorrow. I was hoping that was true.

Before I could upset myself further, Aaron came strolling back in to the room. He commanded every room he entered, and he was just too beautiful to take my eyes off.

Why are the beautiful things always the hardest to have?

He came strolling up to me.

"Here you go." He handed me a piece of paper. "I'm the miserable one, not you." Without another word, he turned his back to me and left the room.

Does that man even eat?

I shook my head. What was this note he had given me? I opened the little piece up and held it between my hands.

Come to the stock room on your next break. Don't be sad.

It was ever the short message, I didn't expect anything less from him, yet, it seemed to mean so much. What had he got planned? Did he really care that much about me and my feelings?

I still was miserable but he had managed to pick me up enough that I smiled.

See, how can I stop something with someone who made me feel the way he did? It just sucked that we couldn't have a normal relationship, a relationship in the future where it wasn't compromised.

Truth be told, I didn't think there was a future with Aaron and I, but I wanted to live in the moment, I wanted to love in the moment and not take the consequences.

Maybe I would do that later on.

_________

Just a small chapter for now:) I'll be updating the next chapter very soon.

Many thanks for the patience!
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