"Put you in jail for something you didn't do."

––Afterglow, Taylor Swift

Freedom is a terrifying word.

When I think of freedom, I think of two things. First, I imagine being completely and utterly happy, able to go where I want, do what I want to do, and be who I want to be. Freedom appears to be an exhilarating experience. However, on the other hand, I see freedom as a daunting thing. Images of large mountains towering over me fill my mind, threatening to crush my insignificant body into a million pieces––I am nothing, compared to the rest of the world, and being out there alone means I would have no power against it.

And finally, after I fantasise about being free, I remember that it's not possible.

Because there's only one way for me to escape this hell of a life. And that means going out into the night.

In case you're confused, here's the dilemma.

Going out at night—––illegal.

Why? People do not get to keep their colour once they go out at night. We call it the 'colour-draining', where everyone loses any colour they have in their body and becomes monotone. As well as that, we are stuck in the darkness, no longer allowed to go into the day.

Touching another human being (unless you have gone through a bunch of paperwork for birth-giving reasons)—––also illegal.

It's all messed up, I know.

Don't even get me started on the colour-draining. They say it's horrible, that it feels like you're going to be imprisoned for eternity, stuck in the monotone.

You'd be trapped in the darkness.

"It's not getting any better is it? " Solis's hushed voice snapped me out of my thoughts, he stole a glance at the cuts and bruises on my arms.

"If you're talking about my history project, then you're right," I replied, sarcastically––pulling my sleeves down further to avoid any continuation of this conversation.

Solis scratched the back of his head with a pained l0ok on his face. "No, Ophie, I mean–,"

"I know."

How could I not know he was talking about my family? It's literally the most enjoyable topic to discuss when walking on a seaside cliff with the only person who cares about you.

"It's not gonna get easier if you don't tell anyone," Solis muttered under his breath.

NEWS FLASH: once again, I was being told things I already knew. The bruises on my arms were enough proof of what my so-called family had done to me.

But how do I explain it? How do I explain that my parents tried to kick me out in the hopes that I'd get stuck in the night? And how do I say that they hit me every chance they get and shove insults down my throat like it was supposed to make me a better person?

"Ophelia," Solis said, his tone sharper this time, "Did you hear me? You need to report this."

Easy for him to say. He has no parents.

"That's not much better, sweetheart," the voice in my head told me.

I froze in bewilderment. 'The voice' wasn't exactly my conscience, it was like it was a person of its own. I'd been hearing it since I was around six years old. I named it Lily and pretended she was an imaginary friend.

However...As I got older, Lily kinda annoyed me. It became more creepy than friendly, having an actual voice inside my head––especially since I vaguely recognised it, but couldn't tell from where. She disappeared for a few years.

And now that I was almost eighteen years old, she had returned.

Don't reply to her, don't reply, don't reply to her.

"Shut up," I silently replied to her.

Another reason why I can't talk to anyone about my issues. If they found out about the voice, I'd be labelled as crazy.

"I'm not reporting it, Solis. I don't need to," I smiled at him to make it believable. "Relax."

"I'm very relaxed," he scoffed, "I've never been more chill in my life. All I'm saying is you need to talk to someone about this."

"I don't."

"You do."

"Don't."

"Do."

"Don't."

He frowned.

"Woah there," I took a step back in mock surprise. "Did I just see Mr. Sunshine, annoyingly optimistic, literally the human version of Apollo, frown?"

"Yeah, I'm full of surprises," he rolled his eyes, fighting back a grin. Ha! I knew he couldn't stay serious for long.

"I'm being serious, though," he said.

Oh. Never mind.

"Lia, please," he said, earnestly, as we passed a small bonfire, "you're hurting yourself."

"I'm making myself stronger," I stopped walking. Solis sighed. An angry, frustrated, 'I'm done with this' sigh.

"This isn't making you stronger, it's unsafe!" he threw his hands up in the air, beginning to shout.

Yeah, after being friends for fifteen years, this was the first time we'd ever adequately acknowledged this topic. And it wasn't going the way I wanted it to.

I wanted it to end.

"What do you know about what's unsafe for me, hm?" I mumbled; Solis pursed his lips, holding back another outburst.

"I'm only trying to help, I care about you and it's about time you––"

"I can't tell anyone!" I yelled, making a hand gesture so wide I whacked him across the face.

I didn't know my strength.

I'd broken the law.

I touched someone.

Not only that, I hit my best friend.

Solis lost his balance from the impact of my slap––and the shock of it. That was when he fell into the small fire we were beside.

Ok, well maybe I'm being a tiny bit dramatic. 'Cause he didn't exactly fall into the fire, more like his leg brushed against it which caused the flame to spread.

Hesitating, I tried to make a decision. Did I rush forward to help him, and risk touching him again? Or did I just leave Solis to struggle?

I shouldn't have taken so long to decide.

Fortunately, he got the fire out. Unfortunately, he did that by falling off the short cliff we were on, into the sea.

Watching him fall off that cliff was the scariest thing I'd ever seen.

☀︎ ☀︎ ☀︎

Twenty minutes later, I was at the police station, arrested for touching and almost committing manslaughter.

"What's my sentence?" I whispered. At least I knew it wasn't Solis who turned me in––it was some creep who'd seen the whole thing through their car window.

The police officer gave me a grim smile. I hated that look. It's how people look at you when they want to show sympathy and seem like a decent human being but they quite honestly couldn't care less about what happens to you.

"From now on you're a Nightwatcher," she said, "sorry, sweetie."

A Nightwatcher.

I could only live in the night.

No colour.

I would never see Solis again.

"I can't be a Nightwatcher," I said, more to myself than to the woman in front of me.

The lady smiled again. "I'm sorry."

But I don't think she understood. I couldn't be a Nightwatcher. I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't. The clouds in the sky darkened at the thought of it and sunrises and sunsets disappeared and the sea dried up and stories the stories about the dark from when I was a kid came rushing back and I couldn't live in a world where the only colours on my person would be black, grey, and white. I couldn't be trapped all over again. I moved a hand up to my hair, the blue, purple, and pink tips of it felt as though they were disappearing already. The one thing that I had control over, the one thing that made me feel like I had power over my family was that one day when I came home with the tips of my hair dyed. They were furious. But I was confident, I felt confident, like a human being who could make her own decisions.

And all of that would be gone by sunset.

"You need to come with us. We need some personal information and all that," the officer beside me said, "come this way."

I followed her in a daze.

"Wait here," she said, pointing to a chair, "I'll be right back. Don't touch anything."

So I waited.

And I waited.

And waited.

Wow, the floor was looking real floory now.

Yes, and that's a very interesting tree outside the window.

You can tell I was beginning to get bored.

That's when I noticed a sheet of paper on the desk. It looked like a boring, official, letter or bank note, until I noticed the heading.

HOW TO ESCAPE THE DRAINING

A STEP-BY STEP-GUIDE

I would be lying if I said my hand didn't immediately reach forward to grab the paper. Unfortunately, that's when the officer decided to come back in.

Great. Just great. Perfect timing, police lady.

"Right," she said, "I'm going to need you to fill out these documents and then I'll get someone to accompany you to the draining."

"Alright," I mumbled, my mind still on the 'escape paper'.

After years and years and years of writing my name, date-of-birth, and address and all that jazz, I was finally let go. Let go to experience my final moments of daytime.

It was only half an hour till sunset.

☀︎ ☀︎ ☀︎

So, there I was, sitting against a tree near the same beach where the incident that caused all of this happened. I watched the sunset. I hated it and loved it all at once. And I realise that for the rest of my life, I'm going to need to appreciate the colour in the world around me, as I will not have any.

Fine. I'll admit it. I was scared. Terrified even.

I didn't want to be stuck all over again. I needed a way to escape this.

I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I turned to see the bright, brown eyes and reassuring smile of my friend. He had a little golden retriever in his arms as well––Fish, his dog (well, more like our dog at this point).

"What are you doing here?" I cried, "you only have a few minutes to get back!"

"I'm not going back," he grinned, sitting down beside me, "a world without colour is better than a world without my best friend, my only family."

Speaking of family, did you say goodbye to your parents?" he asked, placing Fish in my lap. I stroked his fur as he playfully licked me.

But I could only think of what he said.

"A world without my best friend, my only family."

I smiled for the first time in weeks.

"I don't have any other family," I said, "I don't know what you're talking about."

We both sat in silence for a while. And I made a decision. I would go through the colour-draining. I would go through it and until my eighteenth birthday, which was only in about a month, I would figure out a plan to get that paper from the police station. Then I could escape the dark and Solis and I could go back and I wouldn't have to live with my parents because I'll be legally an adult.

I would never have to be confined anywhere again.

"This is the last time we'll ever have any colour," I said, deciding to keep my plan secret for now.

"Maybe the darkness will free you," Solis whispered, as if he'd said the most natural and definitely not poetic thing ever.

The world goes dark, and the only thought I can hear during the draining is that line.

"Maybe the darkness will free you."

Maybe it would, maybe it wouldn't. But until I found out, I wasn't taking any chances.

a/n – first chapter done!! please please pleaaaase tell me what you think, i'd love to have your input. have a nice day/night :)