Knocking a few times and calling out his name he was about to go back to bed when the door to the adjacent room finally opened.

Yawning in the doorway, standing in just his boxers he flipped his hair back with his hand, "Hey, you ok, anything wrong?"

"Can we talk" he asked.

"Yeah, sure" he replied opening the door further.

"About today, in the men's room. I want to apologize" he began, sitting in the nearby chair.

"I should be the one apologizing. I crossed the line" he replied.

"No not really.....well maybe....I just don't know" he started to ramble.

"I took advantage of the situation, of you. You're vulnerable right now with all that's going on. I'm not that kind of person, ya know. I'm sorry, very sorry" he explained.

"Can WE talk" he sassed a bit.

"Damn it, yes. I'm sorry, please tell me what you want to say" he replied.

"First, stop saying your sorry. I know I'm handsome and irresistible, you couldn't help yourself" he smirked causing a bit of a chuckle between the two of them. "I want, no I need to explain some things".

"Okay, I'm listening" he responded.

"First..damn this is gonna be even harder than I thought" Tim told him, nervously rubbing his hands along is pantlegs"..there is something you need to know about me".

Chance didn't say anything, just waited.

"When I was younger, maybe 10 or so, I began to notice things, things that were different about me. Other kids I knew were sneaking looks in magazines or store windows of scantily dressed women, ya know giggling if they saw them in underwear displays. Even worse when it was bikini season. I mean I guess I reacted the same too but I also liked looking at the guys in their swim trunks. I tried to push the thoughts away and I did, for awhile. Then I found muscle builder magazines. I was a scrawny kid so my parents didn't think much of it thinking I was just trying to learn about bulking up. Where I came from kids that looked like me would get bullied in middle school let alone high school. But in reality, I enjoyed looking at their bodies" he explained.

"Can I get you a bottle of water or something " Chance asked when he stopped talking for a minute.

"Yeah, sure" he replied, hoping not to lose his nerve.

Taking the cold bottle he quickly downed about half of it. His mouth and throat had become very dry from being nervous it felt good sliding down. Taking a deep breath he continued.

"I...um...found myself enjoying looking at those magazines more and more. I would take them into the bathroom, you know like most boys that age would, do things that felt good" he admitted feeling a bit embarrassed.

Thinking back Chance remembered those times, thankful he had a barn with a loft to hide in while he discovered himself.

"I...I started noticing the boys in the locker room, intrigued by their bodies as they changed for gym class. I stared alot but mostly fantasized alot about what they felt like. I started to feel  confused, like their was something wrong with me. It was like, it was ok to look at guys in books I didn't know but these were my friends, classmates" he stated.

"Every kid goes through the same thing, it's a time of sexual awareness. I'm sure they were doing the same thing" Chance tried assuring him. "Did you ever, ya know, touch one of them".

"Dear God no, I would have gotten a worse beating than what Wayne did to me" he replied. "No I would just go home, take out the magazines and pleasure myself..until"

"Until? Until what...please don't tell me you were molested" he replied fearful that his actions earlier had triggered a painful memory.

"No...no thank God no....until my father found me one day. I came home from school to an empty house, not uncommon, he would be at work and mom would be at church or volunteering somewhere. I was in my room, I thought I'd locked the door, as I was just about at that point fully naked upon my bed my dick in one hand and the other holding a picture of a man, he walked in".

"Damn, what happened" he asked noticing the tingling he felt of the image that flashed in his mind.

"Alot of screaming, yelling. He ripped up the magazine, called me a fag, a freak. Yanked me off the bed by my hair" he replied as tears escaped his eyes.

Reaching out to him, he gently raised his hand to wipe away the tears.

"We hardly spoke at all after that. To this day I'm unsure if he ever told my mother or maybe he did and that was part of the reason for their divorce. But after that I vowed I would never allow those feelings to surface ever again" he explained taking another moment to catch his breath he found he'd been holding in.

"You've been keeping this secret for what twenty years or more? But what about Caroline, did she know" he cautiously asked.

"No, she didn't. There was something about her when we first met. I just knew she was the one, she changed me. We were each other's first in so many ways. Everything felt natural with her, I loved her with everything, ya know" again he stopped to catch his breath as more tears escaped.

"Then...then you came along. Damn, that first day we met, you took my breath away. I had all I could do not to react like a giddy school girl" he confessed.

Chance blushed at the comment, he'd felt the same towards him. "Why didn't you say something"

"Seriously, room full of guys and you want me to blurt out 'Nice Ass' in front of them" he sarcastically replied.

"Yeah, ok well not then but before like when I was dealing with the tumor" Chance asked.

"Because, like I said I hid those feelings away, pushed them away, deeply away. But I had this overwhelming need to take care of you, like I was drawn to you specifically. Besides I had no idea who you were, how you felt. But all those times holding you through your explosive episodes, comforting you those feelings all resurfaced. But I held true to the vow I'd made to myself when I was younger. Besides, I never knew the real you till this whole mess with Jenika." Tim stated.

"So what happened at the courthouse, you're not upset?" Chance asked.

"Yes and no" Tim replied.

"I'm confused " Chance stated.

"No, I'm not upset you kissed me. I've wanted you to for I don't know how long. But...' he hesitated.

"But what" he asked.

"I'm a mess, this whole ordeal with the divorce, the beating, the blindness. I'm broken and you deserve so much more than me" he replied hanging his head.

Chance stood before him, pulling him up to stand. Cupping his face with both hands he gently wiped the tears from his cheeks. "You deserve so much more,  you're not broken only bruised, let me take care of you, let me truly love you" he whispered before softly kissing his welcoming lips.