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Chapter XXIV ✠ Abandon All Hope

Gareth and Una rode awhile longer until they could see the back doors of the castle. These doors were more heavily guarded than that of Una's own court.

Now that Gareth knows that Una is the north mountains' queen, he knows that he can't abandon her at the town healer's house. He has taken her straight to his first Cousin Llewelyn's castle for the best treatment. She lives in the lavish castle, which Una could not comprehend the size being so large.

"Queen...I mean, Una. It still vexes me how you have made it here when your journey is north? Do you not find it auspicious, especially being that my father is dying as we speak."

"Perhaps as you said before, it is the will of the Gods...your God." Una corrected herself.

"I seem to have forgotten that you Celts have not been completely converted to Christianity," Gareth said with a queer eye on Una.

"I hope I have not offended you," Una said bluntly.

"Not at all. So long as you are not sacrificing my men to your Gods, I see no harm in it. In fact, I find it quite intriguing that you have been untouched by the word of our Lord. It has been said that the quiet people in the northern mountains have stayed the same for a millennium while the outside world continues to progress. I have been converted from my pagan ways. Once you realize that all your Gods are a part of one entity, it will be so much easier to call upon divine intervention without the need for blood and alters." Gareth proposed, putting his hand on his heart.

"I appreciated the kind offer, but I am loyal to my Gods, and I will not turn my back on them for a false idol. And I do not sacrifice my people. Only barbarians believe that it is necessary to kill in the name of sacrifice. That was thousands of years ago when we didn't have anything else to offer up. We may be different than you, but I assure you that my people have changed."

"Do you not find it barbaric that we murder so many in battle?" Gareth said, his smile gone.

"I will say that I do not like bloodshed, but it is a necessary endeavor so that more lives will be spared in the long run than killed."

"So, you agree that killing is wrong?" Gareth said, dismounting the Mercian horse.

Una gathered her thoughts and had to think diplomatically, with her emotions aside. Una hated to kill more than anything, but she hated even more that if she didn't kill, her people would surely perish by the rape and plunder of the Mercians and Vikings.

"I disagree with it, no. It is necessary for some instances. If we did not kill, I would have had a sword through my neck for trespassing on Mercian land, being that I am from the west of Offa's dyke. If we don't kill, we will surely be killed, and along with everyone we ever loved." Una said.

Suddenly the large wooden doors, guarded by two very robust looking men, were opened. Out poured a tall and thin woman. She rushed over in a blink of an eye, even startling Gwen. She looked a bit like Marged with her large curly mop of red hair. Only she wore a veil tied around it.

"My liege, my liege! It is a sad hour. The boy doesn't look like he's going to make it. Ye need to hurry with the lady if this is her friend."

Before Una could react, Gareth rushed to her side and threw his arms up.

"Come on. We must go!" Gareth begged Una.

Una stared down at him, startled as much as Gwen. Was this woman talking about Frey? Una could feel herself grow cold with distraught.

"Quickly! Hurry!" Gareth beckoned Una.

Una hesitated, but she slung herself into Gareth's arms, hurting her neck again. The pain doesn't feel nearly as bad as if she let Frey die. Una knew this was her fault if they hadn't followed the river down to the Severn. If only they stayed north, but the fear of running into the kingdom that slaughtered Eurion still haunts Una. She won't let that happen again. As of now, she can see that it has snuck up again to reap again, and Una cannot outrun or avoid it as she thought she could.

"Lead us to him, Agnes!" Gareth demanded.

Gareth held Una in his arms so tight. She had trouble taking deep breaths. Her neck was jarring too much, and her foot, but she needs to see Frey. After what seemed like an eternity running down a long hall, they approached a door. Gareth hit it with his boot, and the door swung open. Instantly they were met with the stench of cauterized blood. Without blinking, Una jumped down out of Gareth's arms.

"Ahh!" Una shouted in pain as her swollen ankle hit the cold stone floor.

Una fell onto her hand and knees.

"My queen!" Gareth shouted, forgetting yet again to call her Una.

"Leave me be!" Una insisted as she crawled over to the bed.

There stretched out was a very pale-faced Frey. Outstretched was his thin arm. Una gently grasped it and sat herself up next to him.

"Frey," Una said quietly.

Agnes quickly left the room. Llewelyn was standing there with her bloody hands clasped in front of her. Her head was down, and her eyes closed. Sion was holding on to her sleeve and covering his mouth.

"I'm afraid I have done all that I can." She said softly.

"Where is your healer at!?" Gareth shouted.

"Old Blake, well...He passed away a month ago. I meant to get a new one, but..." Her voice trembled.

"Why didn't you take him to the town!?" Gareth demanded.

"He wouldn't make it in time. I had to..." Her voice shook.

"Don't you realize that this is Una's friend!?"

"She knows he is royalty. I told her, Gareth! Leave her alone; she did the best that she could!" Sion shouted back.

"Royalty?" Gareth said, sounding shocked and looking down at Frey.

Before Gareth could shout again, Una could feel Frey gently squeeze her hand.

"Frey!" Una gasped.

His eyes slowly opened. They were cloudy and deep red.

"You...Nah." Frey gently said.

"I'm here, Frey," Una said, trembling.

She could see he was in terrible pain. His cauterized wounds were pouring out blood with every heartbeat, slowing progressively.

"I need...to tell...you," Frey said, gasping.

"Anything!" Una insisted, pulling her body closer to him, her neck stinging her.

There was a long pause.

"Kill my...father." Frey coughed, and blood spewed out of his mouth onto his bloodied tunic.

Una was taken back.

"What?" Una was startled.

"He killed...my mother...my.... real mother." He said with labored breathing.

Una felt tears in her eyes forming.

"What?" Una cried softly.

"My...real mother is dead. I... I saw him...kill her." He coughed again.

"And...With your sword." He added.

Una hesitated and squeezed his hand harder. Has he gone mad?

"What, I don't understand!" Una began to cry quietly.

Una felt like the breath was being sucked out of her. She could barely wrap her head around this unhappy and tragic situation.

"I... lied." He said with a gentle grin that quickly subsided as his face contorted with pain.

"What do you mean, Frey?" Una begged as she reached her arm up and grabbed his hand with both of her hands.

"He didn't...want...the sword. I did when I found you." He said softly.

Una remembered him stabbing her. Did he purposely shallow penetrate her on the wrong side, as acting the whole time.

"What? Why?" Una begged.

Una felt her jaw clench. Was this really happening right now?

"So... I could...kill him. He came back...after he killed your father...without the sword. I was devastated...I wanted to kill him...with your sword. It was my...father's sword...my real...father's. It belongs...to the real...king...my father." His voice calmed.

"Your real father, his sword?" Una asked.

"That's why...my real mother...died. She told me...I was the true king, not my uncle. He...he took...my father's...crown.... and....sword...and my mother. He slashed her...in front of me...I was a child. I was so scared, I thought.... he was going to kill me too. But said for me to keep quiet...so I did."

Frey began to weep, and his tears made his eyes burn, more than the blood.

"He finally had another son...after many...daughters...born three years ago...to...his third wife. Now that he had a legitimate heir...he could kill me. I ran away...the night he was born...and got lost. I almost gave up...until I found you...and the Gods saved me...because...you have...my father's...sword. I... knew you.... could...kill him. I... wanted...take the sword...but then...I knew....you could...kill...him and I...wanted ...you to... that's why I stayed...and the others... left. He said...Cynan was...the only man...who could...ever kill...him. I had grown...too...weak. And you...Una...are so...so...strong." He barely got out.

"I... I don't know what to say." Una said, feeling her chest about to burst.

She began to sob. She knew Frey was dying. She could see it in his eyes. You could feel it in the air.

"Please, Frey," Una begged him.

Suddenly a soft bloody smile came across Frey's face.

"Please...take...this. It... will.... protect you." Frey uttered soft and low.

He struggled to reach down his leg.

"Oh, Frey, why?" Una said with tears.

"My boot...the inside top lace." He coughed again.

As Una crawled down to his leg. There was a small satchel tied securely to the first loop inside his boot. Una quickly pulled it open and reached in. She could feel a cold piece of jewelry against her hand. Una gently pulled out a long golden necklace chain.

"Keep it...remember me...please. It was given to me... by... my mother... I kept... it secret." Frey began to cry.

Una dropped it and scrambled back over to Frey. She watched as Llewelyn jerked Sion by the arm and rushed out of the room with her hand over her eyes.

"No." Una choked up.

Una barely knew him, but she knew him well enough where it will rip her heart out if he does pass.

"It's unfortunate...Una Elisedd. I wish...I had more time...with you." He cried soft tears with his eyes open.

Una couldn't breathe.

"Frey, please. No...no, don't leave me. Don't do it, please." Una begged him as she wrapped her arms around him.

The pain in her neck and foot surged, but she didn't care. Someone could cut her through with a sword at this moment, and she wouldn't budge. She couldn't let go. She wouldn't.

"Una, you...are too kind...for this world...for your people.... for your Gods. I wish...I could have...told you...earlier... I acted...like...a... fool. I... am... a fool for...thinking we had...time. I... was too scared...but how I felt...was scarier. I... still feel...scared. I... wanted you...to fall for me.... but it...backfired." He laughed with a bloody cough.

"You're joking." Una laughed.

"How...how could anyone possibly love a monster like me?" Una wept.

Why was he saying such cruel words to her, Una thought.

"It's easy...to see...from here. You're beautiful...and benevolent....and brave...and brutal all the same." He laughed as tears fell down the sides of his cheeks.

Frey had never met a woman like Una. All the women of his Kingdom couldn't have been more different than her. Una was not afraid to be her authentic self. Una was humble and kind to Frey, whereas the queen of Jorvik in York was rude and snobbish. Una wasn't power-hungry. She only sought to give guidance, not order, to her people around as Frey's stepmother did. Frey didn't lie about Una's father cutting down his mother, but that's what Frey wanted. He hated his mother and knew what would happen if he crossed Una's father, who was already fuming. Perhaps now Frey thinks that it is divine retribution that he was dying now. It was not his place to kill his stepfather. It was Una now. She had been given the rights now, and Frey had lost them.

Una could feel her eyes burning, worse than her neck and foot. Nothing could have hurt worse than what sorrow Una felt. It was happening again, with what happened to Darren and Marged. Now it was Frey, the last person she would believe that would leave her behind in the mortal world.

"Oh, Frey...you're hurting my heart." Una choked on her words.

Frey hesitated, but he had to tell her how he felt. He had been told his whole life what savages they were in the mountains, and they were everything but. Frey could tell that Una was her people's queen. They all loved her and treated her with the utmost respect. Everyone in Jorvik hated his King uncle. Frey looks back and realizes what a coward he was. He could have cut down his uncle, but he hesitated until an heir was born to take his place, and when he could have killed the king, he ran away.

"It's truly saddening...that...the Gods....won't let me...see that...sweet smile again...or hear that harmonious giggling...of yours...or watch you...turn your cheek to me...as we run...in the meadow...with the...glorious sun...shining down on us. You're not...a monster.... you were everything to...me." He gasped, and suddenly his voice fell and became silent.

Una's eyes widened, and she furrowed her brow as tears freely fell from her cheeks.

"Frey?" Una asked him.

She felt his arm in her hands, his pulse slowly grinding down to nothing.

"Frey!" Una screamed.

"Frey, no!" She shook him, trying desperately to wake him up.

His eyes were still open, the ice blue in his eyes fading. She put her hands around his collar and peered into his eyes. She watched as his head tilted back and turned slowly to the side when she pulled him up by his tunic. A steady stream of blood poured out of his mouth and spattered across the bed. Deep down, Una knew he had just died in her arms a moment ago, as she laid across him, but she wouldn't let him go. How could she let him go when there was so much to be done? The Gods wouldn't allow this to happen. They couldn't. It wasn't time yet. It wasn't right. Una needed Frey, and Frey needed Una.

"Please, don't take him! I... I won't forget this." Una said with growing anger.

She had never been angry at the Gods. She had only ever feared them.

"Do you hear me!" Una cried, looking up.

"Strike me dead if you dare! How dare you! How could you do this to me?!" Una bellowed out in a cry.

"You're supposed to protect me and guide me and give me wisdom. All you have done was give me sorrow and death!" Una screeched as she felt Frey's skin grow cold.

"I will never forgive you! Mark my words, you are dead to me, you traitors!" Una cried as she separated herself from Frey, releasing his warm hand for the last time.

Una stood there on her hurt foot and wept until her eyes were empty and her cheeks puffy and red.

"Una, please. Try to pray. Don't scream." Una could hear Gareth speak softly to her.

She turned in pain to the side and looked at him. His eyes were red. He had been crying too, and he didn't know Frey at all.

"Forgive me," Una said.

"There's no need. You've lost someone dear to you. Perhaps you need to seek forgiveness, elsewhere." Gareth said, gently opening the door to exit.

"I will not need their forgiveness any longer, Gareth. All the Gods are dead to me. They already abandoned me, so they won't notice now that I will abandon them." Una hissed as she watched Gareth step out of the room.

She turned back and peered down at her lost friend that was once the vessel of Frey Lothbrok.

"I just need your forgiveness." Una began to cry again, and she collapsed on the corner of the bed.

Her foot was twisted again, and it stung, but that pain felt like pleasure compared to having her heart ripped out. She was all alone now, in body, in mind, and spirit. She had been abandoned by it all, and all for what, Una wonders? Una clasps her hand over Frey's cheek, and she gently moves his soft pale-yellow hair out of his face and tucks it behind his ear. His eyes had dilated out now where she couldn't see his iceberg blue eyes. He was truly gone.

Una is touching a vessel. This wasn't Frey anymore. She hopes that Frey is okay on the other side, running in the golden fields of Fólkvangr with his mother. As much as she envisions him putting his hand on her shoulder at this moment, telling her it's okay. Una hopes he is running into his mother's and father's arms. She hopes he is not sad like she is. She wants him to be happy. He deserves to be satisfied after this cruel death. She sees him smile in her head, that beautiful smile. Frey may have been reduced down to nothing but bones running away, but he was still beautiful. Una can see him in her head. He suffers pain no more. His wounds healed, he is healthy again and full of life. It was beautiful that he spent so many years trying to find Cynan's kingdom but found Una and his father's sword. That's true love and devotion, which took so much courage and dedication. Now in this light, Una can see that Frey was strong all along.

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