ALEX'S POV:

As soon as she left, I screamed out of anger. There is no way I said she was a slut. I never intended to. I never meant. It was just a slip of the tongue. She was someone, who occupied the whole of my heart. Every corner of it.

How can I just hurt her like that? I have promised her that no matter what I will never be the reason for her tears. That I will keep her safe and happy. Then how can I just do that?

I banged my fist on the table. Liquid pooled from my hand when it was forced to the corner of the table, but I don't care right now. I was going through over pool of emotions right now.

But how can she say we are just some reckless affairs?

I know, she knows that we are not. We are more than that. We always have. She wanted to be exclusive in my life, and she always has been. There will be no one like her, to take her place in my heart.

I closed my eyes in frustration and a few flashbacks flashed in my mind to what happened today in the school.

FLASHBACK TO A FEW HOURS BACK

I walked into campus feeling happy and cheerful. She was the reason for it. Yesterday was awesome. I finally told her about my feelings. And my mind flashed back to her beautiful face. Her beautiful figure was just beside me. Her laughs were only for me and her eyes were only looking at mine. Nothing could make me happy as much as she makes me.

As I walked towards the lobby, I spotted Mike, Shawn & Bellamy outside the class, gossiping about something. But they aren't looking the same. I guess they are discussing something serious.

Mike and Bell were younger than me in age, but we always get along together well. Shawn and I shared the same class while Bellamy and Mike shared only the paediatrics class. However, looking at her reminds me of yesterday's incident. Bell's confession. And Mira's jealous face.

No matter how much she denies it, I know she loves me. I just wanted to hear from her. She had this typical lifestyle she says, but deep down I understand she was just a bird, caged by some dark past. I wanted her to take as much time as she needed. And when she finally will feel comfortable, to tell me what bothers her too much, she'd get me by her side.

However, I don't know if I could keep my calm when I will know the person who has dared to hurt her is still breathing. I would use my scalpel in a manner, that is the opposite of saving lives.

I would unalive any person, that has or would dare to hurt her.

Maybe I have gone mad or something. But if so, she is the reason. She wanted to make me do things, that I'd never thought of. There is this strange urge of protection towards her. That almost makes everything looks black and white, to her.

I have promised that I'd take care of her, protect her and love her. So what will I do?

As soon as their eyes met mine, I let out an awkward laugh. Especially I wanted to talk with Bell. We need to talk and clear something out. I knew she had always liked me from the very first day but I have never provoked her in any manner. I see her as my friend or rather a sister. I always make her feel so. But I wasn't sure, so I couldn't tell her directly.

As I remember the last incident in our lobby, I tried not to be too harsh on her. I haven't seen her since then. It was after weeks after her parents got divorced. Mike was always there for her. Mike and Bellamy seemed a little uncomfortable seeing me. Maybe they both misunderstand me.

"Hi... Guys... what's up?" I tried to blend in, but suddenly Bellamy hugged me out of the blue. My hands were up in the air careful not to touch her the wrong way. I looked up and saw Shawn was as surprised as me. But Mike's face dropped. I know he liked her.

Maybe I would never just stand and watch Mira hugging someone else in front of me. I love her too much.

Everyone started looking at us. We are in the middle of the lobby. I gulped, knowing I have to tackle her in a way that she wouldn't get hurt. I don't want her to have another pressure after her parent's divorce.

"Bell... I..."

But before I could say anything, "Why are you with her? I can offer more than that. Just give me a chance." She said, confusing me. She was still hugging me. "I will not only give you sex but I will... love you. I love you, Alex. I really do." Her grip tightened.

I looked up at them all confused. What is she talking about?

"I know you are just seeing her for sex. I can give you what she can... But more. I will do everything you want; I would be anything you like. I... I love you, Alex. While she's just with you for sex."

What is wrong with her? And why are Mike and Shawn standing there like just that? "What are you talking about?" I asked finally pushing her off me. She looked up at me with her hazel-coloured eyes. They were wet and gloomy.

Maybe she is going through some trauma, after her parent's separation. She needs help and I am ready to help her. She is my friend.

"Bell... I don't understand what are you trying to say... but if you need help with... mmm..." and before I could speak any further, she kissed me making me shocked as well as surprised. As soon as I realized what was happening, I pushed her, and she fell straight to the ground.

"Are you okay?" I asked concernedly. I didn't want to do that to her, but it was too much for me. I walked a few steps towards her, but it was too late; Mike already had her. I saw the love and affection for Bellamy in the eyes of Mike the same way I have for Mira. Mike made her stand on her feet and asked, "You, okay?"

She nods her head slowly, but I could see she was not. She needs medical help. And not just for any physical harm, but for mental one. She is not in her right mind, and I want to help her as a friend.

Shawn was standing there lost and trying to calm us down.

"I am so sorry, Bell; I didn't mean to push you like that..." I tried to apologise, and take her to the medical ward. Maybe with the right guidance, she could get back to a normal life again.

"Do you think you can do this to her and get away with it?" Mike snapped in anger removing my hands from her. I have never seen him get mad like that. Maybe love can really change a person.

"I am sorry Bellamy I didn't mean that." I tried to apologise again and settle things.

"And what about you hurting her all these months? You know that she likes you and still chooses to ignore her." Mike shouted at me in her voice, making me stop. "Do you think I don't know about your affair with that lady?" he yelled.

And that is where my world stopped. Do they know about...

No, that can't be. How will they know?

Right now, I do not have any idea what was going on. Still, I tried to keep my mind calm and listen to what he had to say. I need to know how much they know. And if things needed to settle down. I don't want these things to reach Mira. I know she'd get tensed up.

"You are wrong to think that I will let you hurt her. What are you doing with her? For sex? Do you think we don't know about you and Valeria? She is the reason you ignore her, right? I saw you yesterday outside Coleman's restaurant with her. We all know about the rumour about how slutty she is..."

Thank God, they didn't know it was Mira. But at the same time, he is talking about her. I don't know what rumours they are talking about, but for now, I need to settle this first.

"Mike, you have no right to talk shit about people you don't know." I kept my voice low as much as possible.

"Oh, I know all about that slut who sleeps around with guys for some horny ass. She got a good reputation, Alex. And I don't think that a guy like you'd like to stay with her." The corner of his lips twitched with a tiny smirk and I hated him for talking shit about Mira.

They don't know her.

"Here" he extended his hand, holding a diary. My Diary. I use to write my daily journals in that. It was an old habit. Since my father left and I needed to take my emotions out. "You left it behind a few weeks ago. That is when we got to know about your first night with her."

I clenched my jaws controlling my anger, but he was provoking me. "I bet she is addicting. That is why you must keep seeing her. Right? But look at Bellamy, how hurt she is... How much you have hurt her, choosing that fucking slut over...."

That was when I lost it. I punched him right in the face making him fall to the ground. That is where it all started. Us fighting. But my anger took off as soon as he talked shit about Mira. I punched him until he bleeds and would probably end him if Shawn had not stopped me.

Although they didn't know it was Mira, they accused Valeria of being a slut. Whatever they say, it was all about Mira. I cannot stand it when they discuss her personal life choices. Everyone has a choice in life. She has to and I respect that. Most importantly I love her bold side. Valeria. I am thankful I met Valeria before I met Mira.

That afternoon I got called by the Dean and got suspended for fighting. Mr. Anderson, have seen my diary to look after what I was written about Valeria, but thankfully I stopped after our first meeting. I didn't had the time. It took everything to win her back. But there was something strange in his eyes when we said about Valeria...

Does he know about...

No, Mira, said it was a long time back. As far as I know Mira, she likes to keep her personal and official life separate.

But nothing matters to me now. Mira was more important to me.

She still is.

END OF FLASHBACK

I ignited my Bugatti and drove to her apartment. I need to settle things between us. I just cannot let her go. She is misunderstanding everything. I need to tell him what really happened. It was not me. I could never think of anything to hurt her.

As I start driving, it started raining all of a sudden, and just as everything turned upside down in just a day, the rain has to make an appearance too. But luckily, due to the rain, the traffic isn't there as always. I could make it in twenty minutes to her apartment.

I rang her bell and soon she opened the door. Her eyes widened to see me there... Anger was slipping away and I was left only with worries and regret. Drops of water were dripping from my body, due to the rain that soaked me when I ran from the car to enter her apartment. I was panting but still, I didn't care. I need to see her. She just cannot end us like this.

"Tell me we are not just having a reckless affair," I pleaded to her, almost crying and begging. I've never wanted anyone in my life as much as I want her.

"Alex... what are you doing here?"

"Just answer the goddamn question! What are we to you?"

She kept looking at me with her dark cloudy eyes. They were speechless at this time. I've excepted maybe a hug? An apology? But was I wrong the entire time? They have nothing more than pity for those.

I couldn't recognize if she is the same Mira, who use to laugh with me. That sunshine was now covered with ice and it is freezing me to death.

Tears fell from my eyes as I asked once again, "tell me you feel the same way I do Mira! Tell me" I begged. My voice almost broke with the pressure in my chest. "Please" I whispered hoping that could come back to me.

"I am sorry if I hurt you... but trust me, it was not me who took the name of Valeria... It was Mike, and he found my diary... And he read that... I never provoked Bell; she is a sister to me... this all is just a misunderstanding..."

But before I could complete, "I am sorry I can't." Her little words cut through my ears like a knife.

With the last hope in my eyes, I fell to my knees. "I love you." That was my last straw. I didn't want to lose her. She was mine. I can't accept her ending us like this... She needs to understand... She is mine... Only mine...

"Please don't. I have already done so many mistakes. I do not want to do it anymore. Just-- go home, Alex---Please. We can't violate any other terms of the contract anymore." She begged with her stern yet broken voice.

Does she only see us as the contract? I don't think so. We are always more than that. And I know she just needs time to understand that I am not going anywhere. We are not over. We can't be. She is hurting as much as I am. I just need to...

"Is everything okay?" A voice came from behind breaking my thoughts. A male voice.

I frowned and asked in confusion, "Who was that?"

She seemed nervous. Something is wrong. There is no way she is cheating on me now.

And then I saw him coming out of her house. Mr. Han. My world is shattered into pieces right now. I never believed or expected her to be like this.

Is this even true? Did she lie about all of us? But if she did, did she have to cheat with that Fucking Han? Why? Why does God hate me so much?

Is she sleeping with Mr. Han fucking So Il behind my back?

This motherfucker...

I do not want to believe this but I have no choice. I cannot just ignore what I am looking at.

"Alex?" He said while frowning. He was wearing a formal suit and neat attire. He was standing behind her with a straight and confused face. His chiselled face worried. Worried about Mira. My Mira.

"What is he doing here?" I asked Mira in anger.

I cannot believe that she is cheating on me behind my back. Oh, wait, why the fuck am I saying cheating? She never considered me her boyfriend. I was just her game.

"Ale--Alex Listen to me. You need to calm down and go home right now. I will meet you tomorrow, okay?"

"No... It's not fucking okay Mira." I yelled. My veins popped off due to the rush of anger. "I cannot leave just like that. You want me to go home so you can fuck this man right here!" My fury was becoming a rage. The anger in my veins caused them to pop up a little. I can feel how angry I am right at this moment with her.

"Behave yourself, Alex." She shouted trying to shut me down. But I was not going to shut it up today. This was enough. Enough of her.

"Why? Why are you here?" I asked directly grabbing his collar at this time. I knew Mira wouldn't tell me anything, so I needed to take it out of him. "Tell me, why are you so after me? My happiness? Aren't you happy to take away my father from me? Why do you have to keep making appearances in my world?"

But to my surprise, he was utterly calm at this point.

"I think you should listen to her. Tomorrow you are gonna regret this."

"I don't fucking care. Tell me why you are here?" I demanded. My eyes were probably spitting fire by now. I wanted to kill him right there. Mira grabbed my hands and tried to calm me down but it was too late. "Are you sleeping with her?"

I went fucking mad at this time.

"Tell me?" I demanded.

Just then I got a tight slap on my face as all other sounds fainted and I could hear only the sound of a ring... In my head.

Mira slapped me!

I looked at her unbelievably. She slapped me. For him. This is what she is. Valeria. I have always feared this day. When she would not need me anymore, what would I do?

So, this is it. Is this what it feels like? Terrible and broke?

It would be a waste if I stayed there any longer. I have received my answer now.

I cannot believe she did this to me. I cannot believe my ears. But eyes never lie. Her eyes told me how sorry she was really. I closed my eyes and let the lone tear fall away. I chuckled sadly as I stood up. Lost.

"So, this is our goodbye then?" I asked sadly as she kept staring at me with her teary eyes. I nodded to her silence. "If you are happy with him, I am happy for you.".

I know Valeria does not need me anymore. That is what she is. I didn't hesitate any longer and left her without turning back.

MIRA'S POV:

As I watched him go away my heart clenched with the sharp pain that I never expected to have again. I hated to see him leave. I wanted to stop him, hug him and let his warmth soothe my nerves. But all I did was watch him disappear from behind the elevator doors. This is the right thing to do. Right?

I fell to the ground as soon as he left. What did I do? I messed up everything. What do I do now? I can't live without him. But I cannot have him too.

I closed my eyes and let the agony take over me. I let the tears fall away. My heart was aching for him and everything else was disappearing from my vision.

"Mira? Mira? Mira?... Look at me Mira.... take deep breaths..." Mr. Han's faint voice slowly became my focus as it came to my mind but I was not in the state to reply to him or anything else. "Breathe... Just breathe..." His face worried looking at me.

But my mind told me that, I messed up everything due to my broken past. It was my fault.

I think I am having a panic attack... again.... It was so hard to breathe... to see him go away... to think that everything has come to an end once again and...

Before I could think anything else, everything blacked out.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Love is a big word to describe. What I tried to depict in this book was how love can manipulate us. A forbidden romance always comes with greater risk. But also, forbidden love gives you something more than we expected.

They both were broke would before they found each other. It was awesome how they made it out of lust.

The thin line between lust and love says it all. For Alex Mira was always more than lust. And to Mira, he was always her control.

We need to understand that love cannot be controlled. It is the feeling we need to understand.